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Sharp
04-16-2015, 04:00 PM
Introduction


Sup, AK and Sharp yet again with another mag. We're keeping it low-key now with how few people are in the league but that's picking up, which is dope. Hopefully last week sorted out the new heads that'll disappear after signing up and week 2 brings us the quasi-vet presence of knucklehead, AK, Split Eight and Sharp - add that to what we already had and we're only looking up. I contender matches will go up next week to battle Cashius for the title and once there's a champ match weekly cats should be all over this. Til then...


Music selections throughout mag courtesy of Allen Knight
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gk_y2KtQvqY


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57Ykv1D0qEE
(old school)



Reviews


Jilti vs Cymbicort

Allen Knight:This was ok, cym tried he had acouple solid lines but it wasnt enough to beat homo enraged jilti w/ his faggot style..this nigga jilti blood type is -faggot cover in glitter and scratch & sniff stickers.
he listens to brittney spears an admits it he would let her fuck him in the ass w/ one of her cd's he sucked off the blue ranger in 1995 an is proud of it, he is a yellow belt in karate but a black belt in jerkin niggas off, hhes the cornest nigga alive.....

Sharp:Cymbicort surprised me tbh. Haven't seen dude in awhile and when he was last here, he was writing at definite newbie level. He didn't do anything crazy but his punchlines were all competent and showed a sense of wordplay. That said the execution of those flips were ok at best. His atrophy line was the standout for me, while his AK flip was played as hell. The rest of his verse was competent but nothing hard-hitting. Jilti did his standard stuff, strong generic hits but nothing big. I think he needs more competition because this verse was alright but hasn't matched what I've seen from him. Overall, his drop was good enough to take it.


XLNC vs big baby

Sharp:This was a weird one. XLNC had expos like 2003 MLB. Dude brought expos for his verse like he wrote it on a whiteboard nahmean? Meanwhile big baby didn't really have the fire he brings for people he actually recognizes (I was hoping it'd be better for for him but this is how it worked out). Voters basically had to decide if bb's verse made them laugh at all or if XLNC's coherent attempts at punchlines were enough. Honestly one of the worse battles I've ever seen but I ended up figuring XLNC had the closest things to a hit and gave it to him. Votes were split and X got the slight edge.

Allen Knight:This wasnt a good battle tbh, baby was just being his wack self a 30 yr old azn dude acting like a baby online that should just show u what kinda problems he has, right now he prolly jerkin off to anime while eating eggrolls w/ chopsticks a real loser, X atleast tired even tho it was fuckin weird an not good lol, he won


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9mcE-txqoQ


Public Service Announcement


-Did you know: Shank Sinatra aka Shank aka Hank McCoy aka Alphabet aka Boredom aka AKER aka TooManyAliases has a history of biting?-

-Did you know: People apparently still bite in the year 2015?-



Fresh ur white inbred trash.. That's for sure
U the type to find a bitch trailer home then drag her back to yours



u from the deep south huh? inbred creep can’t even bag the nastiest of whores
ur the type to find a bitch, trailer home..chloroform her then drag her back to yours


and in the very next battle, as our own Allen Knight pointed out:





I put in work breaking the bank w/ the weight that I cake boss
If u have ya nose to the grindstone s’cus I’m holding it there sanding ya face off
ugly fucker, ur thunder struck when the god is out, I’ll drop this lout..
ironic that left hook gave u a crooked I & now I’m taking YOU to the slaughterhouse


Hes spent all week workin in his forum, can tell this gays scared
fuck putting ur nose to the grindstone... I'll stick his whole face there


You're one of the dopest, what the fuck are you talkin 'bout??
My left hook'll smash your crooked I so hard it breaks up slaughterhouse..


Moral of the story: lololololololol. Free personal shots at Shank if he can show his face in the next two months

https://warosu.org/data/vr/img/0013/24/1389410428156.jpg


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QFnOzuDTCA&feature=iv&src_vid=7Vn79WP0sJ0&annotation_id=annotation_4020146615

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80Cmg0CguEk&index=99&list=WL

Predictions


jilti 1-0 vs shank 1-0
Considering Shank has been caught biting on RB and might have bitten one of my old verses from the archives I don't think we'll see him for a few weeks. If they actually were to battle, it could be a solid battle that I would bet on jilti winning only due to shank's general inconsistency. If both were to show at 100%, it could be close but with how iffy shank is and how dependable jilti is with showing, you have to give jilt an edge.
Jilti: 65/35


Greed 1-0 vs Defiant 1-0
These guys could make for a good battle if both show up but Greed can be hot and cold with bars and Defiant can cease to exist for 3 months at a time. If it comes down to both showing at 100% I would actually give Greed the slightest edge, because I haven't seen anything from Defiant lately and he could have considerable rust. That said he's easily capable of taking it so it's not an upset for me either way. I'm hoping both show and if that happens I got Greed by a hair.
Greed: 55/45


Dr Dog 0-0 vs Knucklehead 0-0
Should be good. Split's battle career has been brief but enjoyable to watch. Dude can bring a good amount of that humor he has in discussion into battles and that plays out hugely for him. Knucklehead is a long, longtime veteran who can hang with the very best of text if he's motivated, which I think he will be but whether or not he shows can come into question. If it works out where both show I give knuck the edge, split can be a wildcard with hit or miss humor while knuck is usually good with punches, but this is still my pick for BOTW
Knuck: 60/40


Mutilate 0-0 vs Allen Knight 0-0
We know AK can be dope when he's feeling it and any sort of forum beef is usually motivation enough. Honestly I've never seen Mutilate battle before (at least under this name) but from the way he carries himself I know he's no stranger to text. Allen is still one of the best active battlers and honestly I'd be hard pressed to bet against him, especially if I don't know competition. But I do know Mutilate has some experience and motivation, so this could be dope - hoping for the best but with what I know I give AK a good edge.
Allen Knight:70/30


Ammo 0-0 vs Sharp 0-0
No idea how Ammo is as a battler but best of luck dude.


Amen 0-0 vs Cymbicort 0-1
If this troll account has the energy to show I commend the effort. Otherwise its cymbicort by noshow.
Cymbicort: 75/25

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Vn79WP0sJ0




Eye Candy


https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B-TOjjkIYAEs8jb.jpg:large
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-G2VohhZiTVw/AAAAAAAAAAI/AAAAAAAAABc/nBkI4TlV_T4/photo.jpg
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0p154bdYK1qlqt47o1_500.jpg
https://s-media-***he-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/2b/fd/1e/2bfd1e27385324b411eb0c50b0349f8a.jpg
http://media-***he-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/15/2a/62/152a6214b7d9fdefa6c6454146fed10f.jpg
https://s-media-***he-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/76/a0/f5/76a0f562e5d0ed4fd19970e3e88ef39a.jpg
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8o8cgQ2Mc1qj552mo1_500.jpg




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gR0ggCjURhY


WTF's


WTF at RB stealing the Ultimate Battler from us
WTF at Shank aka Alpahabet finally gettin outted for bitting when he been doing it for years.
WTF at Knucklehead and Split signing in. this gonna be good
WTF at only like 9 ppl in the league lmao
WTF Wiz Khalifa new mixtape being fire an no one sayin shit.
WTF at Aaron Hernandez being guilty of murder
WTF at me an sharp the only ones that care about battling anymore.
WTF at jiliti still being a faggot.
WTF at des talking shit about nbl an all leagues failing then starting up the 1-2 punch, like a faggot he is.
WTF at bags pissing on the vagpit anime chick


Outro


Dope. Tbh week 1 didn't phase us, the first week of nbl has always been full of noshows since netcees.com went down (RIP). Just keep doing what you're doing and we'll keep giving you a place to battle and mags to read. The more the better too. Anyone ghosting, quit being a bitch and sign in. If you're on the fence just join, the moment good competition shows up more follows. Til next week.

Sharp
04-16-2015, 04:04 PM
jilti 1-0 vs Shank 1-0 Greed 1-0 vs Defiant 1-0 Dr Dog 0-0 vs Knucklehead 0-0 Allen Knight 0-0 vs Mutilate 0-0 Ammo 0-0 vs Sharp 0-0 Amen 0-0 vs CymbiCort 0-1 Muff Destroyer Orc ill nik-A @bagsworth bently Alvin Karpis big baby XLNC Hush ...the Munster Genocide Legion Malachi Strikta Urban Dialect YDK

jilti
04-16-2015, 04:11 PM
good work Sharp. Hopefully more comp in the coming weeks. Y'all gave me too much ammo btw

Mutilate
04-16-2015, 04:38 PM
Dope lol you always do good mags

Sharp
04-16-2015, 04:44 PM
thanks, appreciate it bro Mutilate. thats why me and allen do these
good work Sharp. Hopefully more comp in the coming weeks. Y'all gave me too much ammo btw

dude half of the mag is supposed to give people ammo like the WTFs are 40% current events people can flip lol


that said you got boredom on a week where he was fucking teething over at RB lol

El Muffin
04-16-2015, 04:47 PM
Outro offended me

So I joined lol

Sharp
04-16-2015, 04:49 PM
Outro offended me

So I joined lol

IT WORKED DIDNT IT


i thought of you as 'on the fence' if it helps lol

El Muffin
04-16-2015, 04:55 PM
lol. it's all good

No harm done

Sharp
04-16-2015, 05:56 PM
alright good no more feelings ITS BATTLE TIME FAGGOT

Defiant
04-17-2015, 05:55 PM
Nice mag bros buttttttt


Please dont predict against me again I told u im champing

Glossy Finish Dick Lips
04-17-2015, 10:07 PM
LOL @ these dumbass niggas thinkin I'd lose... smh, yo.