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Sharp
05-13-2015, 10:40 PM
Netcees Battle League
Week 6





What up u slut faced whores, its yah boy AK & Sharp back w/ a another mag for the best battle league on the net today, this past week was nice & active w/ good voting, props to yah'll and we had some good battles, we have plenty of new sign in's and some vets, this week should be the best so far, so show u faggots & this will keep goin strong, lets get into this past week


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DhcBkdtNdQ


[Reviews]


Champ Match: Cashius 1-0 vs Sharp 3-0
[I]A Cinderella Story ending in a Bitch Slap
[Allen]
This was a dope ass battle both had fire, def BOTW. Cashius had a good verse the shar pei line was dope as fuck & grow outdoors bar was tough, Sharp had a dope verse to, the Jameis line was fire & C-span was sick, def a close battle had to re-read acouple of times, the votes went back an forth as they should cuz it was to close an this type of battle came down to style preference & voters felt cash more so he pulled out the W 6-3.


Contender Match: Mutilate 2-1 vs Allen Knight 2-0
Taking out the White Trash
Alright battle but Allen was the pretty clear winner tbh. Mutilate has a nice grasp on wording but the filps themselves are all done. Like a GOAT/goat flip, a giving out shots line, a seizure flip that's been done... there's just nothing there that benefits from the wording. Allen just had bars fro Mutilate. Everything was either quoteable or almost there. Voters gave him the KO win and Allen goes on to this week's champ match.


jilti 3-1 vs Drencrom Muff 1-1
[B]jilti wins by KO
This one kinda disappointed. Jilti had a solid verse that fell off a bit, while Muff was just trying to avoid a no-show. Jil didn't have anything bonkers but Muff was just inconsistent. His Delphi line was cool but the rest was mostly played. It wasn't bad but most voters felt jilti was the clear winner and gave him the unanimous win.


Junto 1-0 vs Defiant 2-2
Junto wins by KO
This was a nice lowkey battle, both guys had pretty good verses without anything too huge. Defiant had his down and out line and a few lines that were nearly quotable while Junto had his top 8 and Muff discussion lines. While most voters agreed it was close, they all gave junto the win with one extra quotable bar.


Sn00p 1-0 vs Killing Spree 1-0
Sn00p wins in a split decision
Cool battle, KS made it closer than most people woulda expected but he's a capable battler to say the least. Their verses were pretty evenly matched, about equal in consistency with the same amount of misses. Votes went both ways but most voters felt Sn00p's nameflips were more effective than Killing Spree's Avengers line. Sn00p takes the dub in a close one.


fraze 0-0 vs ispaz 0-0
fraze wins by KO
Okay battle. I think Eye slept on fraze because he basically came out of nowhere and paid the price. Eye had a nice catch fraze flip and then a bunch of played or just bad ideas, while fraze was more consistent and while a lot of stuff was played, it was all worded well. Not a huge battle but I think Eye will drop better after getting caught sleeping this week.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhDd9odnxRE


[No-Show Shine]


Wanderer vs Unfukwitable (NS)


Fuck this Lightweight Faggot, you goin home early again just standard
I've Wasted you with this first Bar - you always stumble out of em hammered
Claim to be dope but you a liar, got the chokehold on you so the truth transpire
It's no wonder all your bars so wack.. You need oxygen to make fire
Small Fish, got bars of lame gun talk, the ice beneath you startin to look thin
I'm sure your whole crew surrounded by metal - nobody ever told you that's a sardine tin
I'm after the win, you bite all your writtens faggot, an still they ain't good enough to archive a stash
Don't get me wrong you often Outstandin - by garbage cans tryna recycle trash
Don't consider the bars of a waster, this dude think corny lines are the best
I know you think your Cheese Greater - I just wanna see that many holes in ya chest
Are you depressed? deluded thinking you'd impress or that ya chances in a higher position
You so fuckin Shocked how I've made Light Work of you, they gonna be calling me Electrician


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cItut6QQyaw


[Top Punches]


1. [B]Cashius vs Sharp
I won't lie though...I see you fucking some of these broads hard...
But either shar pei for them bitches or they're uglier than those dogs are

2. Sharp vs Cashius
You're still champ cause jil blew it. For real, those stanzas sucked
Had Jameis'in everywhere... no surprise you looked worse than the Tampa Bucs

3. Allen Knight vs Mutilate
gotta Hanzo blade ready for the attack route
cuz Visa faggot & i'll swipe his face w/ the side till his life max out

4. Junto vs Defiant
Look when it comes to power rankings there's some very fine lines
I could make a case for 1st. You ain't been top 8 in the league since there were 9 guys

5. Defiant vs Junto
Girls the type to suck a dick n run, we dont ask 4 another try
So its ironic we call u a down n out, when she does it to every other guy

6. Sn00p vs Killing Spree
take 'em back to mine when i hit on girls. u make bitches hurl...
only chick wanting to go back to KS has to find a yellow brick road to a wizard 1st

7. Killing Spree vs Sn00p
Plus I blast Hulk size bullets out the Iron Man, that'll dead ya crew
One round'll have u out cold quicker than Hush, @ Avengers 2

8. Jilti vs Muff
this albino punk is a loner, cuz no girl can stomach the odor
such a foul smell from his Musketeers up even the toughtest of soldiers

9. Muff vs jilti
every verse is played af. You can tell guys horrible
He's just a bitch hallucinating off of rock fumes like Delphi 's oracle

10. Eyespaz vs fraze
i'll open the hatch. Get up and blast in stealth.
couple shots'll catch fraze.. but your name still ain't ringin a bell.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=meT_znGGtvs


[Battle of the Week]

Champ Match: Cashius vs Sharp
Cashius wins 6-3


Cashius


While I'm searching for pussy for taking down, you're looking for dudes to lay and pound
When a girl asks "What's your sign?" you hold up the one that says "Gay and Proud"
You're certainly whack, kid. Can't clash with Cash...that courage, you lack it
I understand why people think that you're Split...it's cuz your half nerd and half faggot
I got home videos of hitting pussy that would leave you pissing on yourself
If YOU'RE making a video with box in it...I bet that it's prolly similar to Zelf's
Hush wants to know how to grow outdoors...he's cutting and bagging on occasion
You wanna know how to grow outdoors too...
Cause your childhood was nothing but Dungeons and Dragons in your basement.
Bitches never flock...Ain't none of'em licking on your cock, kid...
If a chick is even seen with Sharper Image will plummet quicker then their stock did
I won't lie though...I see you fucking some of these broads hard...
But either shar pei for them bitches or they're uglier than those dogs are
Word on the street is you're hung 3cm...that shit is a joke, you twerp
I don't care how hard that Nine Inch Nails a bitch...it still wouldn't be known to Hurt


Sharp


Your champ run's 'bout to end in pain. Trust, Sharp'll waste you
Fuck ending on a sour note, this'll make Jamie Foxx's Anthem look tasteful
Said he wants a Karaoke win streak. That'd cut the league's progress
If C span goes for 10 weeks it'd be fucking duller than their coverage of Congress
I'm laid back and low key. As exciting as me? Please, b
After college I cleaned up my act... you picked up the personality of a squeegee
Those accomps are ALL NC2. Zero competition is what's spurring your climb
Face it. You're more dependent on new blood than the Red Cross during wartime.
You're still champ cause jil blew it. For real, those stanzas sucked
Had Jameis'in everywhere... no surprise you looked worse than the Tampa Bucs
You can barely drop a minimum. You got no motivation or you're a frugal cock
Your account isn't just missing drive. It makes me nostalgic for Google docs
You'd let your favorite battlers defile you. It wouldn't help anyway, bub
you want a trickle down effect...
But lookin at your bars its clear Bags is just interested in that anime slut





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UFkRFWMbFM



[PSA: Missing Textcees]

Please keep an eye out for these poor souls and help us bring our boys home.


DEON


Age: 27
Weight: Not to be underestimated
Last Seen: Evolving into a Burger King Franchise


http://images.t-nation.com/forum_images/9/a/9a0b5-fat_black.jpg


ALIEN


Age: Infinite
Weight: 12 parsecs
Last Seen: Phoning home while smoking a cigarette in Bagsworth Bentley 's bedroom



http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Alien_4dd46c_141274.jpg


KNUX


Age: 24
Weight: Plenty, brah
Last Seen: Comparing his muscles to other men's online


http://i40.tinypic.com/33cwztt.jpg


NAMIX


Age: 38
Height: Annoying
Last Seen: Giving unwarranted advice to anyone who could hear him


http://www.teamjimmyjoe.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/BAD_TATTOO_MUGSHOT.jpg


USERNAME


Age: 29
Weight: Too depressing to say
Last Seen: Drowning what was left of human shame into a 3rd big gulp


http://politicalscrapbook.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/fat-computer-nerd.jpg


KUNGFUGRIP


Age: 4 decades
Weight: Samurai sword
Last Seen: Being the waterboy on the set of kill bill 4 being paid in ninja stars


http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/7/7d/Master.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width/180?cb=20110105135506

STYK FIGURE


Age: 55 in dog years
Weight: german shepherd
Last Seen: stalking the local animal shelter late night in baltimore w/ a honey mustard bottle.


http://www.asianjoke.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/baby-eating-dog.jpg


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzTEQMMdl14



[Previews]


Champ Match: Cashius (2-0) vs Allen Knight (3-0)

[Sharp]
This should be close and dope. After Cashius nearly was upset in his second battle as champ I expect him to bring more than he has been, which he has to do if he wants to beat Allen anyway. The last time these two battled was on NC 1 (I think) and I'm pretty sure Allen got the dub. Both dudes have been keeping busy since then though, they're number 1 and 2 for most wins in the .co/.org era of netcees and have shown no signs of rust in the last few weeks. Picking a winner's pretty tough here – Cash done a lot in last two years but he's only really struck big on NC2. Allen hasn't had as many high profile battles since taking over modding when he does battle he's still deadly - he managed to be the first to reach 50 wins on NC.org. I gotta go pretty much equal, but if I had to choose Allen gets a slight edge for having beaten Cash before and I think he's deadlier with motivation. The only thing I really expect outta this match is it being dope.

Allen Knight: 55/45


Contender's Match: Junto (2-0) vs Sn00p (2-0)

[Allen]
Dope battle right here & def contender for BOTW, both are on there game right now.
Jun is dropping good verses right now, he is a threat to champ, but sn00p is also in forum
hes been real consistent. This one is close clash of 2 different styles, this one is hard to call tbh. I think it could go either way depending on who is harsher & fresher w/ concepts, which there both good at.

Winner=50/50 this is to close.

[Sharp]
Maaaaaaaaan idk how this one'll go but I'm really looking forward to it. These two have their own really different styles but get the same level of heat. I think it'll be a matter of consistency. I know they'll have flames but keeping it up will make all the difference. And both of these guys have their issues, Junto erring on the side of too simple while Sn00p will err on the side of too complex. Lately I think Junto has been a hair more consistent but that doesn't mean Sn00p is an underdog here. If I have to pick, I'd go with Junto with one more punch that lands.

Junto:55/45


jilti 4-1 vs Sharp 3-1 (Pics)

[Allen]
This will be onesided, jilti is horrible & i never read his verse anymore there like pouring
gasoline in someones eyes, Sharp had a nice showing last week but lost in a close one w/ cash, some think he won. He will destroy this faggot jilti. this isnt close

Winner=Sharp 10000/0

[Sharp]
This will be a good battle if only because we agreed to do this first pic battle on NC since like October. Props to jilti for agreeing to it cause he didn't have to, but I'm hoping it'll bring them back a bit. Gl jilti, let's make it dope.


Burd 1-1 vs Destroyer 0-0 (Pics)

[Sharp]
This battle could really easily turn into a 3-way between Burd, Des, and motivation. These guys have both had some dope verses but they've also just kinda shat their way through verses if they don't feel like it. This fresh start for text is prolly gonna be a good time for these guys but if one isn't into it, this could end up one-sided. Orc's been more active lately so I give him a slight edge but Destroyer could take this one if he's not rusty. Looking forward to seeing both of these guys in action though, especially if they do pics which both are great with.

Burd: 60/40


Tic Tac 1-0 vs Wanderer 1-1

[Allen]
This solid battle, wanderer no show verse last week was pretty decent, better than his verse the week before, i think hes shaking rust off, so he could be nice...Tic is good he's battles on rb an here he has some dope shit & could make a run to the title but he can be lil inconsistent sometimes but wen hes not hes a threat.

Winner=Tic Tac 60/40

[Sharp]
No sense tryna predict a battle that's already open (Allen did his predictions yesterday). Get voting!


Razah 1-0 vs Fraze 1-0

[Allen]
This one will be close both seem to be on the same skill level, razah no show verse wasnt bad but wasnt great still had acouple cool joints in there, maybe hes rusty idk. Fraze
wording is smooth but needs to be harsher an concepts lack a lil but hes still solid battler
he could be rusty to idk, cuz i never seen either one of these dudes before

Winner=50/50 anyone can take this.

[Sharp]
Going off of last week Fraze definitely has the advantage in wording. Razah was basically dropping a noshow verse so it's hard to say how close that was to a real drop, but he did have slashes at the end of his bars – hopefully his style isn't too dated that he can't hang but it looked like he had good ideas. Fraze had ideas that were pretty done before but worded well and if it comes down to concepts vs wording it'll be close. That said I give fraze the advantage just cause his last drop was better, but Razah's got a pretty solid chance as well.

fraze: 55/45


Eyespaz 0-1 vs pound 0-0

[Allen]
Never heard of pound....Eyespaz had a dissappointing drop last week only one nice bar the rest off, idk i seen him drop pretty solid verses on rb idk wat happen here. hopefully he makes up for it this week. i see that happening

Winner=70/30 Eyespaz

[Sharp]
Eyespaz will win by NS. I feel bad sticking him against the biggest NS liability this week cause I like his style and he's good for showing but that's the way it worked out.

Eyespaz:75/25


Neighbor 0-0 vs Nightmare 0-0

[Allen]
Nightmare is a rb dude but i wont say his name...hes pretty decent. Neighbor is dope has the best wording in txt alot say & he is harsh w/ it, this could be a cool battle, but i see neigh taking it, but anything can happen cant count nightmare out.

Winner=Neighbor 70/30

[Sharp]
I'll say his name lol. Cred right? Cool that he's here. Ain't really seen him battle before but he seems alright. Assuming neighbor isn't rusty though it could be onesided. If he is, who knows. Not counting Cred out but Neigh's the favorite.

Neighbor: 65/35


timeless 0-0 vs daGGer 0-0

[Sharp]
Yeah. timeless is a pretty good, multifaceted writer who can be hit or miss at times but is generally an effective writer. Great with sports bars tbh. daGGer could never be heard from again or the reincarnation of David Lama's wet dream texcee, but we never know, and odds are it's not always great. Fact is timeless has checked in and daGGer hasn't so I think timeless gets the NS win. If this battle goes down, I give time the advantage because he's a decent battler and idk what daGGer can do. I always wanna be proven wrong when I say this sort of shit but for now I gotta give timeless an edge.

timeless: 70/30


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fT3AHVtw1uc



[Power Rankings]


1. Cashius
Last week: 1
The returning champ earned his title against Sharp last week and could potentially beat anyone he faces. It only gets tougher from here so we'll see if he can keep it up.

2. Allen Knight
Last week: 3
Has beaten Cashius before and has a chance to do it again for an NBL title. Could definitely take down the champ this week.

3. Junto
Last week: 5
Can stamp his ticket to the champ match this week but has to beat a site favorite to do it.

4. Sn00p
Last week: 6
A great battler in his own right, the only thing really in his way would be having to fish for concepts and getting too stretched.

5. Burd
Last week: 7
A win would put him in the contender match. One of text's best, his main competition could be rust but if he gets past that, it could be a straight shot to the throne.

6. Sharp
Last week: 2
Gave Cash a scare in last week's champ match and could find his way back there if he keeps battling.

7. Neighbor
Last week: unranked
Is up against rust and motivation, but if he can get past that it'll be a problem for anyone.

8. jilti
Last week: unranked
Consistency wins battles and while he doesn't have the heat some other competitors do, he's never out of consideration for contender matches.


Honorable Mentions: Destroyer, Tic Tac


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR7q5ye2h5k


[Hot Chicks]


https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xfa1/t51.2885-15/s306x306/e15/10864787_847786778576243_1548609191_n.jpg
https://s-media-***he-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/d1/1c/d5/d11cd554c82cba6029483e3f86a0d4b3.jpg
http://static.dnaindia.com/images/***he/1944836.jpg
http://rollingout.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/WCW-Women-Crush-Wednesday-Instagram-Kate-Upton.jpg?769134
http://i.imgur.com/7m0p7WA.jpg
http://data3.whicdn.com/images/119725569/original.jpg
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vmyk7_ypYqc/VFMs8pf9j0I/AAAAAAAAClo/zkL_D_P7Kic/s640/1.JPG
http://realtalkny.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/@lira_galore2.jpg
http://raannt.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/samantha-hoopes-new-2014-sexy-bikini_raannt.jpg
http://i.cdnnaij.com/o/WejpoUaBfZmjJKWEQkZ0sqPp.jpg
http://i.cdnnaij.com/o/MYWqBxy0ALyC8Zcgaw2kTO82.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B9QXtvACYAAYp_U.jpg:large
https://s-media-***he-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/bc/2f/7c/bc2f7c2ec0d77c4158a92764227c84b3.jpg


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUrylVpV5V4



[WTF]

WTF AT THE HUSH AND MUFF BEEF BEING AWKWARD
WTF AT THE NBA PLAYOFFS BEING CRAZY DOPE
WTF AT JILTI STILL IN THE LEAGUE AFTER BEING CALLED WACK BY EVERYONE
WTF AT TOM BRADY SITUATION AN EVERY ONE KNOWS HES NOT GONNA GET SUSPENDED OR ANYTHING
WTF AT THE NEW BATMAN VS SUPERMAN TRAILER BEING CRAZY DOPE
WTF AT ALL OF RB TRICKLING HERE CUZ WERE THE BEST LEAGUE OUT
WTF AT ZELPS VIDEO POSTS
WTF AT BAGS STILL BREATHING OUR AIR


[Outro]

Shout out to all of you doing it as usual. Keep an eye out for a roast or cyph next week if that BA cyph gets closed. Shout out to God of War for motivating us to be better than RB (<3) and @Bags, Hush, and James Avery for giving us new things to flip every week in discussion.

Sharp
05-13-2015, 10:42 PM
jilti 4-1 Sharp 3-1 Sn00p 2-0 Junto 2-0 Killing Spree 1-1 Burd 1-1 Wanderer 1-1 Razah 1-0 fraze 1-0 Tic Tac 1-0
@ispaz 0-1 pound 0-0 Destroyer 0-0 Neighbor 0-0 Nightmare 0-0 DaGGer 0-0 timeless 0-0

Hush
05-14-2015, 10:45 AM
Dude
That where are they now section rocked


U bring a flavor of humor that no one else has to txt mags before
They are entertaining even if your not into the batted



Bravo

Tic
05-14-2015, 12:10 PM
Nice mag. Whereartthou section was dope.

Cred
05-14-2015, 04:32 PM
Dope mag. Props on the read bro bros

ill nik-A
05-14-2015, 09:54 PM
Where are they now was dope

iSpaz
05-14-2015, 11:43 PM
Dope

Burd
05-15-2015, 12:33 PM
dope shit. i'll try send u some stuff for the next mag

Sn00p
05-15-2015, 02:49 PM
yall dont get nearly as much recognition as u deserve for these mags. always dope and always on time. the modding of this league is mad underrated. props forreal.

Tic
05-15-2015, 07:05 PM
yall dont get nearly as much recognition as u deserve for these mags. always dope and always on time. the modding of this league is mad underrated. props forreal.
Word. Definitely been doing a real solid job.

jilti
05-15-2015, 07:13 PM
Sharp & Split do an excellent job with the mag

Sharp
05-15-2015, 07:47 PM
Appreciate the love guys

And splits been focused on the OM stuff lately, he's only directly contributed to one mag this season. Every thing else has been 50/50 me and Allen

That said he's a valuable figure in keeping text going

jilti
05-15-2015, 10:08 PM
Ok u & Allen.. good co-ed team

Split Eight
05-15-2015, 10:33 PM
Sharp & Split do an excellent job with the mag

I brought you the formatting lols

Sharp
05-15-2015, 11:14 PM
I brought you the formatting lols

That's why I said direct, we use your formatting but you haven't wrote any specific thing for a lil while so yes youre indirectly in every mag and I VALUE YOU COSMIC BROTHER

not that you're expected to write something every week, I just want allen and jilti to kiss and make up and saw an opportunity for jilti to acknowledge AK being good for text

Sharp
05-15-2015, 11:36 PM
dope shit. i'll try send u some stuff for the next mag

please do, that'd be dope. We always post tuesday nights (US time) so send anything by then and it'd be perfect

Junto
05-17-2015, 08:43 AM
always a quality read from you two cum swapping skanks

El Muffin
05-17-2015, 09:26 AM
*loads the Kalashnikov*