1. Certain vs. Da Battlemasta Patrick - (Certain wins)

[Vulgar]

You've been enlisted for an abstract cause.

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Verses Due Sunday Morning.
Midnight Western / 3 AM Eastern / 8 AM UK.
(Extensions only granted if opponent accepts, anything else is unaccepted.)

Voting Ends Monday Night
12 AM Western / 3AM Eastern / 8 AM UK.
Exceptions can be made if a suitable reason is supplied
Remember The Earlier The Verses In The Sooner The Votes
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Peace


Topic:

http://pre00.deviantart.net/88ce/th/pre/i/2015/110/0/8/evac_by_delic-d8qg5e1.jpg

Certain Da BattleMasta Patrick

[Da BattleMasta Patrick]

Taking your chick in an abstract manner boy….

As far as BMP can see it’s a pic about the connection of my dick’s erection below ya chick hoes midsection.
See that ship? Tell me what is it shaped like, and aint it certain? See that other ship breaking? Aint that how I leave her cooch hurting?

Metal. Steel. Sky?
More like getting head and copping a feel.
Yeahhhhhhhh….Pats that guy.

Bro you falling through the sky, cuz you alone in ya home typing a poem,
While Patrick’s fat dick in her cooch on the low and leaving her mind blown
The sky represents how cloudy your priorities are bro,
you on the net 24/7 while Pat is dicking your hoe.
The clouds bring rain in due time as is their purpose, their reason,
the perfect metaphor for how I have her squirting while she screamin.
It is just natural. It is just factual. See that small ship? Its hooking up aint it?
And that is you falling out the picture, cuz my dick in her dicking her was better and celebrated.
Think about it. Study the picture. It is deep on so many levels while Pat convinces,
that my cock broke off her box and now she crumbling cuz Pat packing all dem inches.
You free falling. Where is your parachute you big dummy?
Gravity taking over and now you making a splash, like my skeet on her tummy.
The art work of the picture is very detailed and complex,
My hard work when I dick her left her derailed and a mess.
It made her ship break off in half, and that ship is her coochie
The man falling through the air is you, because you lost, because you a rookie
The little ship is my dick, which aint little, connecting my thang to her cookie
The force of the course of the source of the whores I coerce never shook me
Patrick the master of battling. Patrick had your chick keeping secrets with no tattling.
I am Certain you a trick. I am certain that you a Virgin, and certain that this picture paints your pain.
so use your smart words and grammar to try to prove you have a brain, but in real life, where it counts, you is only a lame. (fact)

watch this bitch, "the molecular phasing of the discombobulated metallic alloys went round and round...."
blah blah blah because you exited the ship, and you are falling to the ground.

So I ask, when a virgin falls flat from Pat's verses….does he even make a sound?
Patrick the mad scientist, bro my "Penis (pen is) wise" how I am "It" and left you "clowned".

That's a triple entendre bitch
just know ya hoe a straight goner bitch.

BMP 4 life.

[Certain]

The buzz signaled it.
A hum in the background, at a studious pitch,
loomed in the ship. Foretelling doom in a clipped loop.
Even as our ears became used to the hiss.
It grew louder.
Dropped an octave, a boom-boom and a swish.
Hovering through every notch and enclave.
We tried to ignore it. We were so stupid, remiss.
We tried to ignore the twisting steel losing its grips.
The outages came.
Usually, we’d assume things would return to form,
so we stayed true to the plan.
Grinding away, laughing but never too loose among friends.
Every once in a while, a funeral sets a mood of regret,
but mostly we ignored those who came unglued or just left.

We’d lost two ships in the past. A matter of suffixes.
Tried to ignore the old friends, avoid being stuck in the past.
We’d paint everything green, hoping for growth,
all the while, too stupid to see there’s no place like home.

But they were my friends.
The beards and the boys, the girls, even the oldest.
And as the band played on the deck, they needed this moment.
It became clear that a hero would go unnoticed.
But I dragged that lifeboat out of the hull,
filled it up with people from both ends.
Just enough air to fill lungs, hold it deep while they’re hoping
for a better day ahead.
While me, I take a leap mid-explosion.


http://i.imgur.com/8AIsnfa.jpg

[Geno]

Pat
Lol. Man.. why did you have to go this route? I keN thats cool.. u took a humorous approach, but its just screaking out 'lack of a better idea'. There were some funny moments. Ill give you that.. and then there were moments when i was like.. why am i even humoring this post? Lol. Nothing personal man, but it just seems that your really out of your element with this one bro. Could have done so much with what you had to work with and you just kind of threw something really uninspired together.

Certain
I really liked the style you wrote this in. You have a unique touch to your rhyme scheme imo. Its really becoming your own. The story was dope. the personal attatchment you gave it when talking about friends was nice. Gave it a realness. didnt overdue anything and was pretty straightforward. Had a couple of bumps in the flow of things as i read it that could have just been me.. but it made me double back to re read a couple lines trying to find what the bump was in smoothness if you know what i mean. I do that alot when im reading something that seems to have a nice smooth read to it and then i hit a hiccup.. i wonder ig its a flaw in my reading or if it may have been a flaw in the syllable lengths or something the writer did. In any event.. it was a minor thing.

Enjoyed both verses. But i could only take one seriously. Sorry patrick

V/certain

[Witty]

Just upping above the extensions and no shows, will get to this asap.

[UnbornBuddha]

Patrick: What can I say? This was obviously some type of comedic attempt to pass time rather than an inspired work that actually emanated from the picture. I mean it is what it is. Goofing around is fine, but it won't make you a better writer, unless of course you actually put more focus into your satire. Even so, I don't think derision and lampooning would have bested your opponent.

Certain: Reminded me of a derivation of Titanic, with a space flair. It seemed the demise of the character's home was a slow one, which meant there was time to lament the passing of close friends. In some parts, I felt it was a bit less dramatic than the mood it would have needed for the reader to have a more surreal and vivid experience while emerged in the story. After all, the place is deteriorating, so of course the expectation is for it to be more captivating and immersive. Nevertheless, the inward reflection amongst the destruction was amusing, and I particularly took great delight in the last stanza. A great finale to capture the image.

Vote: Certain

[Mr. J]

LOL

Kirkmaster St Patrick...

I enjoyed your verse for the comedic approach it took
if I was standing in a vinyl store listening to two amateurs on the mic this would be Godly to them
you caught me off guard but I should have expected that after the intro
you sir...are funny


Certain, I like the way you craft your verses..
the flow and constant imagery is well implied here
I feel as you could have done more but due to your opponents verse
you hold the edge for bringing the more serious approach..
I can appreciate the quality of your verse much more knowing your superiority here
and I look forward to our next battle..

v/Certain

he had the more serious verse and seemed more Abstract & Martyrish

[mayniuhh]

Abstract, Wes. The word of the day, Wes (and everyone else) is abstract.

Patrick wins easily to me, but I'll explain.


(abstract)

Other voters, let's the very clear bout one very important thing:

both stories are equally cliche.

As far as that goes, these two verses really are on even ground. Certain provided a spirited elaboration of the image. He gave these ships, that storm, those men and women, that evidence of wreckage, that cold uncaring atmos, that... fear, a home in finity. I felt... that. But to the honest, when I first looked at the picture, I already felt AT LEAST that much, so I found it difficlt to give Certain credits for that.

DBM is the greatness. I never read anything ever (likely from this likely alleged human before. I just love the energy of this verse. I didn't think there was a pulse to Certain's very clean but not at all abstract verse. PBM, unlike Certain, USED the picture to highlight what he probably already knew would be the problem with his opponent's verse. And sure, clownage ensues, but so does abstraction. I think the spirit of the tournament should matter when the verses are so close in quality for different reasons.

Please don't believe I'm ignoring Certain's obvious technical proficiency. I just don't think it's enough.

VOTE: DBM Patrick

[Clutbuck]

LOL Patrick was on some other shit here, Veritas vs DBP needs to go down at some point on this tourney!

The take on the topic was hilarious, comedy verses always seem to do well in the topical realm for some reason I've noticed. Maybe they're just few and far between so it's more noticeable? Regardless, the concept was pretty original. The execution fell a little short, mainly because the first six or eight lines seemed to really just repeat what had been said prior to them and not move the storyline on at all haha! I have to say this is one of the more creative entries submitted in round one, and I guess given the theme of the tournament that should be praised pretty highly. I'm more of a linear writer Iguess in comparison so we do differ slightly in that aspect. Funny as fuck to read, though, first I've read from you unless you're an alias!

Certain: This was a solid enough piece, well executed and with some great wording, very crisp. Your writers voice is almost always commanding and I think that's a huge strength of yours personally when utilised like it was here. A lot of emotions attaced to imagery which makes it very relatable to the reader. Two very different styles and approaches but I can't help but feel Certain took this comfortably. I liked the humour in DBP's joint but Certain had more overall that impressed me here.

[Woke]

BMP this was a fun read at the very least. Some of lines just came off as easy though, (coochie, rookie, cookie). I understand this was all fun and games which could have worked on so many levels, but you simply ran out of shit to say mid way through evidenced by the fact that you mentioned certain being the guy falling three separate times.

Certain, this verse was, well to be 100% honest just not that great. I will say you explained the picture well, but that's it for me. Even the rhyme scheme I felt had it's lows mixed in with it's finer points. The story as a whole was a bit uninspired to me as a reader. It didn't grasp me least, I had no connection to the character, even the action seen lacked any flair.

In the end, while certain had the better verse technically and mechanically BPM's had the entertainment factor and gripped me a bit more, although neither verse was my cup of joe

BMP

[MMLP]

I couldn't get in to DPB's verse, I don't think either piece was too abstract, Certain had a nice flow and was technically better. Both stuck to their pieces well, but on preference of style, I v/ Certain