Week 6: Silver vs. ribbit - (Silver wins!!)

[Vulgar]

LGPA Season 1: Week 6

Silver ribbit


Check ins: Tuesday (Midnight Eastern time)
Poems Due: Friday (Midnight Eastern time)
Votes due: Sunday (Midnight Eastern time)


Topic:

Choose your topic from the Topic Thread.

Good luck.

[2tripple0]

We meet again

[2tripple0]

ive got it all under control
im like a station that i advice the protocol
shit is getting difficult im afraid the system is on overhaul

the amount of information being displayed by this system
im seeing double like i was having a vision
its important to the reality of all our children

and still acuire the needed fuel to continue
i keep a long staff who make entrances to introduce
i doubt that you would mess with this house cat in my venues

and im spitting real you be committed to my design
my apparatus is industrious the way i capitalize
im an endorphin keeping my happy doped up and stabilized

i decided to end this tragedy early
its been too long since i engineered my tapestry
it needs work im still sitting up late thinking my target was his infinity

how much time should i spend on this topic
im at a meeting hello my name is x and im an alcoholic
i can tell the future but best believe i keep it tarnished

--

[Dope girl]

THE CHILDREN ANGRY
I FEED THEM
HOMELESS PEOPLE DON'T HAVE NOWHERE GO
I GIVE THEM A HOME
POOR COUNTRIES DON'T HAVE NOTHING SO I Give them donation people hurting I rescuer them
PEOPLE DON'T GOT NO CASH
I give them money
PEOPLE around the world dying
I HELP THEM SURVIVE
PULL THIS THREAD

[8===D~~~~(}:]

stop it- innovator

[Adonis]

Well this was less than stellar. I did however lol in a bit of a literal sense while reading final bar, that shit killed me. 2k I assume wrote about professor x in cerebro and doing a bunch of other shit. Story was jumpy though and just overall a tough read. I can't say silver had this go green tree hugger thing going on, but the final bar put it all in perspective as a big joke and a bit of diss to triple0.


V/ silver humor over story

[Objective]

2tripple0: I have no idea which picture you wrote to and have no intention to go to the threwad to try to figure it out. The story was abit chaotic but seemed to be about an alcoholic/addict that can foresee the future or whatever hating on the system, I'm not sure. The reality to our children, what kind of reality are you talking about? Did he kill himself or what? I'm having issues getting your text tbh, either way I don't know which pic you were going off of either so it's whatevs.

Silver: Same probs like 2triple0 with the topic, less wordy and your grammar still need to be polished some more. At least you had a clear message.

Vote - this is big words that doesn't really domuch when it comes down to it vs a slightly clearer message. Silver had a short poem, no structure needed there, 2triple0's was more sporadic with some rhymes here and there that didn't really compliment his poem other than just rhyming so it evens out. Close battle since I couldn't tell what picture either went for and I honestly think that Silver made more sense with her poem. 2triple0 shot himself in the foot and Silver edges it to gain my vote.