Half Wit It 0-0 Exis 0-0 - OPEN FOR FEED

[Adonis]

AOWL Season V, Week 13


SUMMARY OF RULES:

Verses are due
Tuesday at 9 P.M. Pacific/West Coast or Tuesday 11:59 PM Eastern / 6:00 AM Wednesday Central European/London
There are NO extensions.

Verses MUST be a minimum 10 lines or a maximum of 48 lines (or 650 words).

Votes are due Friday at 4:00 p.m. Western / or Friday 7:00 PM Eastern / 1:00 AM Saturday Central European/London Failure to vote will result in automatic sign out for the next week.

All competitors must vote on THREE battles

Read the full rules here! (http://www.netcees.org/showthread.php?t=119848)

Topic:
http://i.imgur.com/1TA6sIK.jpg


G/Luck

Half Wit It Exis

[Exis]

Are you fuckin' shittin' me lol...I'm against my nigga?

I won't even get a vote , he'll destroy me...especially with a pic right up his alley, fuck is wrong with y'all smh.

[Half Wit It]

I forgot all about this...I was drunk...

I'll try to show.

Nah, it's not like that Ex lol.
Look at it as a a collab my nigga.

[Exis]

Well here we go then lol...good luck bro.

Ayo,

She's obsessive
she needs him
yet suppresses her feelings
Ella stares vacantly out a window that's drenched as an expressionless being
with her index finger she writes a message
that'll get deleted
after only several seconds of leavin' it
saying ' I'm gonna end shit this evening '
wishin' the pane of glass she stands before would shatter completely
and she gets shredded to pieces
see Ella is broken hearted,
but the guy she thinks her heart is broken over really doesn't exist
it's just a friggin' fiction figure she's done made up in her wig
deluded,
confused
girl moves to the bathroom
removin' both shoes
in the most unusual of fashions
stumblin' her way down the hall
Ella finally makes it to bed
where she falls awkwardly backwards onto the mattress all bent
reaches across with her right hand
to get a knife from the night stand
transfers it to her left in one action
like she's ambidextrous but hasn't
fuckin' realised she isn't,
the ceiling is spinnin'
Ella's feelin' weird
really different
she's clearly not Wit It
her doc's in need of a visit
he always pray the outlook is brighter even if it's the middle of winter
intrigued so she listens,
she can hear the rain peltin' down as the electricity flickers
gettin' ready to fatally go
she puts the blade to her throat
doesn't understand she's embracin' a ghost as she's erased in a stroke
bit like an Ex does to bitches when he leaves 'em dead with a written
the only outcome achievable is where you end up the victim
pity you can't ask Ella 'bout this here
as she actually knows,
what it is literally like to be fuckin' played by one's dome.

[The Law]

Exis - The storyline and approach you took was pretty dope. Loved the way you ended it off. The imagery was nice as well, describing her message on the glass and that it disappears. Electricity line is another example of good imagery and use of descriptive words. For the most part the drop had a good rhythm, however, there was a few hiccups in the flow, at least for me while I was reading it. Other than that it was a solid drop with a good progressive storyline. A more what's happening in the moment approach than giving your character a background story throughout. Nice job.