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View Full Version : Summer Classic VII - Semi Finals Magazine By Strikta


Ghost1
08-19-2016, 09:35 AM
intro to the intro by Bags
look yo lol. I don't got time to format this shit. or put a bunch of google images thru out this bullshit. just imagine some neat picture separating each section ok fagot? also lol at strikta so fucking strung out he prolly think he actually wrote this shit/ I did reviews & previews, @schadenfrued did the intro, battler profile review, Punches of the week & a top 3 contenders section. Cred also did a top punches of the week section, which is because I didn't know schade had one already. I did the reviews and previews. this shit is an eye sore but this is what u get. aight lets goooooooooooooooooo




INTRO

Welcome to the laziest, most unorganized, half-assed & trifling Summer Classic in NC history.., speaking of which, everyone welcome Strikta back. The first round proved utterly uneventful battle-wise, meaning no bars were worth quoting. Plus the fact that half of these dickheads no showed..smh. And the second wasn’t much better, tbc. Therefore I’m declaring the Elite 8 (and Chemist) the true SC, that’s is if fools give this tourney some Life & drop at least a semblance of their best writing. Since We’re the ones idiotic enough to stick around, We the remaining battlers need to to bring some crazy bars; that way We’ll restore some of the prestige & honor that this great tradition deserves. Otherwise Aero & Cronus are right.., LMAO I’m bullshitting, those lames could never be right about anything - Life, Bars, NOTHING!! Anyway my point is We can get this shit corrected NCs.

REVIEWS


Reviews since schad interestingly said he would do them and did some other weird shit lol

John Hensley vs Jilti
flat out this battle was possibly the worst battle of the round. I dont want to be too hard on Hens here.,....id be 100% lying if i said there havent been multiple times in my nc stay that ive seen hens return and just absolutely obliterate people. Hes a former summer classic champ and on every top 10 list of text ever. period. that said and proper respects paid....this verse was boo boo. jilti came pretty jilti ish. in the end with hens rust and jiltis wackness this was a bit too close for comfort. if this actually got a real vote count hens may have lost. This coming round he will need to step it up/

Karaoke vs Veritas
possibly my fav battle of the round, veritas wasnt necessarily overly good here but his approach and delivery have been entertaining in this tourney to say the least. a bit of grit and grime added to his personal wit and charms have made his verses worth a read for sure but with an extended and notorious reputation on nc this was going to be an uphill battle against the likes of karaoke no matter how dope he came. karaoke is arguably one of the best battlers in regards to using that personal edge to his advantage if not the best. With a grocery list of ammo and an extensive history behind veritas he had a lot to work with here and really just rained down blows on V here.

Cred vs Murda sho
Admittedly i scheduled this match up for the fans. I think we got a pretty cool show here. Sho a little rusty but he still had some raw stuff....unfortunately for him cred has been consistently dropping fire for months and is really peaking currently. hes come into his style nicely and is beginning to expand on it offering more complex concepts and wordplays making him considerably threatening. sho was good here as said but i think his verse was a bit rushed and he may have dialed it in on a few bars where as cred did not let up.

Tic vs Kenny the OG
tic sucked. didnt drop the line minimum and the majority of the lines dropped were lazy. dude said he was busy tho so i mean fuck it, it happens. kenny however looked MEAN in this one. showing shades of his NBL verse against orc in the playoffs. same as cred kenny really been putting the time into dropping bars and its showing. you put in 100 plus hours into anything and youre damn sure to hone your approach and develop a solid plan of attack in regards to strategy. the whole tone of these verses have been on some bully shit. mush ur girls face and pocket check you type shit. this wasnt even close.

Destroyer vs Swerve
this was decent. Swerve came with the NCG fuck your whole life nothing is off limits even ur unborn child is a faggot approach and i personally dug it haha. unfortunately tho for his case you still need to be clever and drop strong connections, just saying ur gonne punt his preggo wife in the stomach with clete shoes on isnt enuff without a dope analogy or strong wordplay. des came with his newly honed style mixing humor with gun play and made short work of the hunchbacked canadian lotioned up loser swerve.

Schadenfrued vs Barcotic
this is maybe barcotics 5th straight battle in a row that was closed and turned into complete chaos do to his swaying....and then per usual every1 else was to blame. not going to review this battle acknowledging any of his bars. they were garbage. instead im just going to do a line by line break down for schade who was a good sport about having been victim to barcotics childish bullshit. likely since i will be involved in whatever text tourney or nbl season pops up next with the current state of modding i would like to make it clear you will not be participating in whatever it may be next. youre no longer welcome to battle here/

Just another..

FACTS.. this shit barely a match, u became laughably wack,
Sharp beat u w/ Ridiculous personal attacks, while yours are EXACTLY that.

this was cool, and strong since bar threw a fucking fit about this wen it happened.

An idiotically arrogant has-been, still think u the illest, u not
Cronus? Only had a couple important points in time - that’s a digital clock.

this is a fresh spin on a clock concept. and dope personal.

Fool look it’s not clever if u need visual aid just to sell a bar
s’like every useless diss u choose to spit ends up as google pics in yo avatar.

LMAO facts. sad shit.

We haven’t forgotten how u posted gay porn on our boards
like dog that shit was beyond PAUSE - yo fag ass been fucking on All-Fours.

damn personal after personal.

Get conniptions over any critique like we said u suck at rap,
buncha snaps, lip-smacks & claps, u need more Computer Love than Zapp.

this is so hard hitting due to the way he acted this battle alone lol

Sensitive fuckboy, bust yo pop toy, show if u bout it homie..
but my semi clap live, giving piggy back rides, there’s always a body on me.

WOOOO

Send my Canadian Boyz N Da Hood to go crazy w/ the heat
all within range get deceased, shit the Tre even lifting babies out the street.

yikes

Plus u passive aggressively change bars to make ‘em tough
but my clips extended as fuck, so keep editing bitch, I got the Director’s cut.

cool closer

..BODY!

Previews

Cashius vs John Hensley
real spit.....this is a clean body for cash. I feel almost bad feeding him to the cash man but hes gonna have to earn that legend name every time he shows his face. Cash is not outside of hensleys skillset by any means....if anything in their prime hens takes this......but judging by last week hens is far from his prime and cash is dropping verses on a weekly basis since january....good verses no less. cashius has endless ammo on hens here and i cant figure hens knows anything about cash....i mean the people that regular the site dont even have dirt on this guy so hes gonna have to really play to his strengths in regards to fresh concepts, strong wordplays and clean wording. cash will be coming for blood as any1 does when pitted against an outdated hero returned for glory. this should be a fire ass battle. i got cash here tho.

Cred vs King Karaoke
haha i set up some bangers this round for sure. This will be a gritty one for sure. Both competitors generally keep it a bit more straightforward with a grimy feel, theres not a whole lot of personals against cred but theres enough for kar to do work here. cred cannot win this battle without going personal and at this point there is crazy ammo against kar. this is one of my potential BOTW choices. probably going to edge it to kar here for a few reasons. hes more polished, he will have his opponent studied and can do what cred does with the gun bars but in addition we will see an aggressive personal approach here.

Kenny the OG vs Schadenfreude
this is the dark horse BOTW pick for the week. i only say that because these guys arent necessarily big names to an outsider....i mean its not hush, orc karaoke, cashius etc that people in the disc would even recognize....but any1 who has been actually participating in the league and this tourney as well knows that these 2 guys have been barring the fuck out. kenny to me is more agressive, has a more flexible approach with more weapons available in his arsenal whereas schade is pretty consistent in his general appraoch......this is not a bad thing necessarily tho.....hes been doing better with his personals and trying to expand it would seem on more complex concepts and angles. kenny is going to be more creative here with better wording and a harsher verse.

Destroyer vs Bash vs Chemist
well destroyer is well known, just got out of the finals in the nbl playoffs and has been easily making his way thru the summer classic without any major opposition, these other too chuckle heads have been lucky enuff to not have their opponent show in any single round. Bash is actually fairly decent and des should not sleep on him. chemist is the worst of the 3....if i were him id prolly try to find some old rudge1 or j hens verses to bite and hope no1 notices. des obv the heavy fav here, bash on his best day could take des on his worst tho so hopefully we can get atleast a mediocre des so that we can have a dope final 4/





Since this shit’s become the No Show Olympics, I’ll just review each of the remaining 8 (and Chemist)..

Chemist - Uses a “natural” style, meaning he rarely forces wording and/or concepts, but on the other hand, his writing comes across as extremely basic. Should work on adding more complexity, creativity & harshness to his writing, that’ll make more of an impact.

Cashius - The most consistently dope son of bitch on NCs w/ creative & original concepts, somewhat straight forward wording, yet he’s never lacking in harsh, hard-hitting punches. These attributes always make him a problem in any battle.

Bash - Has a fundamental style, as in his verses are technically sound & read well, but that tends to make his bars too predictable and/or boring. He should experiment more w/ his concepts & delivery, that’ll keep the voters more interested.

Schadenfreude - Best way to describe myself - I’m a fucking artist, which can costs me a victory. Tbh I tend to be really lazy & unfocused. Or I try too hard to be different & creative, causing my shit to get convoluted. I’m learning to write to win tho & I NEVER NO SHOW.

Kenny the OG - The big Homie, I’d describe him as the Tim Duncan of text, extremely consistent w/ admirable technical/fundamental prowess. The problem is that his material can be dull at times. But when the man’s inspired, he’s a difficult target to hit for any opponent.

Destroyer - The grizzled dark house of text. Fool could pull off an shocking upset against any of his better competitors or drop a stinker & get swept right out of the battle. But fuck all that, u just bet not sleep on Marshall Mathers’ older, angrier brother. Plus he’s got a baby on the way, so he’s proving mfers wrong everyday.

Karaoke - Has the meanest personal bars on NCs & is consistently the favorite to win any battle. I personally feel his delivery gets too statement-ish at times, but mostly the man haymakers opponents out of his way as he stomps into the finals of whatever tourney he’s in.

Cred - The Gun Bar King of NCs, no denying fool has some shit, not just gun lines, but the lack of personals can cost him against the best his competition brings. Although he does pride himself on ALL BARS, CUZ HE DON’T KNOW U NIGGAS, or whatever the fuck he used to say.

John Hensley - The Legend, he’s arguably been one of the best text battlers to ever do it, but as of late he’s been VERY rusty. Perhaps he’s washed up or quite possibly only just getting started. I suspect that We’ll all soon know which is the case, w/ certainty.

Grudgingly, TOP PUNCHES & why I chose ‘em

this is des' year... ur dead queer. Listen close while the boss talks...
I'm like 'fuck swerve' so much, i stay runnin over slow kids at crosswalks
- Destroyer
Overall decent verse for the ole guy, but that opener was hilarious, may or may not be a concept Swerve has seen before, but it has a Des humor to it, that always works for him.

Ur wife needs to start eating in portions or ur kids'll wind up being some orphans
It's ironic you post bible verses all day when you're a faggot of biblical proportions
- Karaoke
Could of went w/ a couple different bars, but this one’s just harsh as fuck, bruh..lol. Simple flip, but the shit landed harder than a bitter bitch.

Sensitive fuckboy, bust yo pop toy, show if u bout it homie..
but my semi clap live, giving piggy back rides, there’s always a body on me
- Schadenfreude
Idk, niggas were quoting that “PAUSE” joke too, but I like this more. Plus it seems as tho those personals I TRIED didn’t land.

Get the teeth slapped outcha mouth for rappin, jaw crack & a wisdom tooth gone
U'll be tellin a dental surgeon how i hit ur top row so hard that the bottom rung like the tier that ur on
- Kenny the OG
An unusually long-winded bar from Ken, but it’s still dope & very creative, imo.

NC's gun bar assassin just lurking for who I'm a smoke next
2 Arms Over ur Head put them Thoughts on the Board like a protest
- Cred
My favorite bar from the battle, the boy can come up w/ a billion different clever way to say he’ll shoot a mfer..lol.

As for me? You better believe the shotty rocks.
Bury ya, then leave the corpse covered in Lime like tequila body shots.
- John Hensley
And Hens had a few other decent joints, but this bar hit the hardest, imo.


Bars of the week (Part 2 by Cred)


Bash

U run w/ a crew of actors, if they challenge me the clips'll end em all
This tech'll lead ya castrate to the grave for thinkin they have the balls

Barcotic

ur a joker, in fact holster a gat & I'll still open ur cap
I'm off the wall, no Sugar Rush-schad.. 'cept u will get KO'ed if u go for the strap
n tbh dog u ain't a rasta mon, ur a stupid dork
if there's ever firearms on u, ur attending comic con as the human torch

Shadenfreude

An idiotically arrogant has-been, still think u the illest, u not
Cronus? Only had a couple important points in time - that’s a digital clock.
Sensitive fuckboy, bust yo pop toy, show if u bout it homie..
but my semi clap live, giving piggy back rides, there’s always a body on me.
Send my Canadian Boyz N Da Hood to go crazy w/ the heat
all within range get deceased, shit the Tre even lifting babies out the street.

Kenny the OG

Been duckin me since bragginwrites.com, oh well, the luck on ur side was necessary
But i was bound to get that old win & todays the day u run into that odell like a secondary
Let the milli rock u, drop u.. u stuck the landing musta rehearsed it
On ur summer olympics shit, to bad gettin the 9 from me's the closest ur ever gettin to perfect

Tic

You’ll Swim w/ the fish cuz I’m not the type to dwell
Point & shoot. You’ll have more Medal round ya neck than Michael Phelps

Destroyer

plus des bringin guns to the party, just to watch how this bitch handles
& when i spark and light up the cake, it aint gonna be with them trick candles

Swerve

Dude I busted too!!!! So if you’re thinking Swervey will falter,
That shit's a wives tale...like the one yours told you about you being the father.

veritas

Bitch, I made a career busting shots in stereo, that’s a parrot Glock
Bitch, You made a career from getting ginger props, that’s a carrot top!
Shit. Peep how I just merked you with a genius verse that made ya brain break….
That’s why I just lit up your lines to help you stay true to your namesake.

King Karaoke

You've been an outcast your whole life, everyone respects me from g's to gents
The only time you're part of the in crowd is when you're holding up signs at wwe events
You're afraid to ditch the psychiatrist gimmick, that ain't even half your fears
I guess it's hard to show personal growth when ur hair hasn't done that in years
U have Patrick Stewart toys not just because u resemble the movie star
The truth is your collection of Star Trek dolls prove just how spaced out you truly are

jilti

pop the shotty open, then dump ur body in the ocean
give u a Cap before entering the water.. olympic swim coaches
one right will end ur whole life, its the haunting truth
gonna see hands before lights go out.. thats the conjuring 2

john hensley

U don't get pussy, let's face it dawg, ur gay.
watchin' the LFL was the First Down Bitch he's ever seen in Lingerie.
Think ur dope beatin washups? I KNOW ur lame & no factor.
Like playin' wit a Pre Existing Injury, U just overcame an old Fracture.

murda sho

Heads start rollin when I let off 4's and leave u dead all cold & stiff
They say bullets have no names which is why these got Cred all over it
Ain't no more teaming up with annoying pricks...
I put the 'Gun Bars' in the squad u were way more concerned with the 'Boys' in it


TOP 3..easily

John Hensley - As I stated above, dude’s a legendary battler & that alone keeps him aloft at the top.

Cashius - The Amish Murderer, this mfer never fails to drop dope, giving him great odds to bet on.

Karaoke - Prone to go beast mode on bitch niggas..lol, fr tho if he’s present, he’s a problem.

Bash
08-19-2016, 10:44 AM
Props to yall for doin this

Aero
08-19-2016, 12:41 PM
Major props on this mag. It was a good read throughout. If Cashius wins this tournament he can make it on my top 25 of all time list.

Chamber
08-19-2016, 12:53 PM
Lol, dope mag.

Cred
08-19-2016, 01:12 PM
Haha, word this shit was hype asl. Rep to every nigga that contributed.

Chemist
08-19-2016, 01:36 PM
lol and chemist

Destroyer
08-19-2016, 01:49 PM
A mag?
This will not stand

Ghost1
08-19-2016, 02:23 PM
I'm drunk on strange pussy, sleep deprivation and questionable decisions

Deleting mag immediately

Destroyer
08-19-2016, 03:14 PM
Lmao

Amen
08-20-2016, 09:24 AM
If I beat des 2 times out of 2 battles, Bash can beat him, for sure.

Just saying.

Des on his come up after 30 years, tho. It's his year, guys.

murda sho
08-21-2016, 12:45 AM
Now niggas do a m... Y'all get on my damn nerves b

Chemist
08-21-2016, 04:59 AM
team underdog

Chemist
08-21-2016, 04:59 AM
if amen beat him, I can beat em lol

Useless
08-21-2016, 01:27 PM
Dope mag

Tic
08-22-2016, 01:10 PM
What were you thinking putting that Michael Phelps line as top punches? Bags

That line was worth about 9 seconds of brain activity.

Ghost1
08-22-2016, 01:58 PM
What were you thinking putting that Michael Phelps line as top punches? Bags

That line was worth about 9 seconds of brain activity.

the parts that I personally wrote in this mag give you zero credit for that wack ass verse. YOUR WELCOME.

blame cred or schad for trying to be generous I spose

ole gonzo ass wigga

Tic
08-22-2016, 03:11 PM
the parts that I personally wrote in this mag give you zero credit for that wack ass verse. YOUR WELCOME.

blame cred or schad for trying to be generous I spose

ole gonzo ass wigga
If there is truth to this, I commend your honesty.

Ghost1
08-22-2016, 03:19 PM
commend a dick faggot

Cred
08-22-2016, 03:22 PM
Yeah i picked the least suckiest punch bro :/

Aero
08-22-2016, 04:03 PM
commend a dick faggot

Sus.


Tic you begged to get in tourney only to disappoint? Mid tier fits you soooo snug. You love it.

Cred
08-24-2016, 01:23 PM
Lmao @ u faggots crying for a mag this whole tourney, now we got one n the chat n mag is dead

Ghost1
08-24-2016, 01:27 PM
lmao read my mind

battles due tomorrow btw

@battlers lol

Schadenfreude
08-24-2016, 02:21 PM
Lmao @ u faggots crying for a mag this whole tourney, now we got one n the chat n mag is dead

100%

Chamber
08-24-2016, 03:39 PM
*CLOSED*

No one deserves to win this.

Cred
08-24-2016, 04:14 PM
Lol

Hottest Vixen
08-24-2016, 09:15 PM
Congratulations to everyone

Kenny the OG
08-25-2016, 08:35 PM
Change of plans Schadenfreude. Sending 16 to bags around midnight, i cant be giving up tactical advantages. Text iz life. Ext is there if u need it tho.

Schadenfreude
08-25-2016, 10:02 PM
Change of plans Schadenfreude. Sending 16 to bags around midnight, i cant be giving up tactical advantages. Text iz life. Ext is there if u need it tho.

Well I'm about to post in a few.

KnowP
08-26-2016, 03:25 AM
whats good in here tho

sral
08-26-2016, 04:07 AM
sup knowp?

Cred
08-27-2016, 08:35 AM
Will get to voting later today.

john hensley & Cashius yall niggas need a drop already.

Cashius
08-27-2016, 08:41 AM
My verse was sent last night.

Cashius
08-28-2016, 03:42 PM
Yo, just take me out. I'm in the semis via 3 no shows. No thanks.

Ghost1
08-28-2016, 06:02 PM
If I take u out then w have a 3 way finals


-____-


U want me to neg u now or later ?

Destroyer
08-28-2016, 06:14 PM
Now
Dont take that dude out

Schadenfreude
08-28-2016, 06:30 PM
Yo, just take me out. I'm in the semis via 3 no shows. No thanks.

They're scared of u bro, besides it's HIGHLY unlikely that u'll get no showed again.

Barcotic
08-28-2016, 10:49 PM
lol u all deserve this

Chemist
08-29-2016, 01:02 AM
BUMPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP