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Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:28 PM
Week 3 1-2 Punchline Magazine




Intro

Watsgood yah pussy ass niggas, its time for another edition of the 1-2 mag by yah boy Funeral Knight & have some help by the homie Aero, This past week was pretty fuckin dope only 3 N/S shoulda been 0 but some niggas can't write a bar in 10 mins LOL, anyway there was some real dope bars this past week. We have some dope sign ins like the Hoffer's Orc & Hush as well as some new comers to the site an league, this week looks fire. Ight, Lets get into this mag yah'll.

http://67.media.tumblr.com/ca2722d1f0c91e10292299fc458946f2/tumblr_nipg2bQ95n1tjx66ko1_400.gif




Reviews
By Aero


Barcotic vs Certain

Certain had a decent concept with Juiced Bar. I couldn't give it to him Bc I'm huge on wording. Barcotic had a nice concept but technically it doesn't make sense. You don't text in caps to convey you're in a loud place you text in caps to express yelling and you can do that in a library. Honestly, I may have sheep voted on this one. I really just wanted to say tie. Ultimately somesway I mean somehow Bar won. Lol he had better execution.

Aww Shit vs Pinot

Aww Shit is my guy from RWs but this nigga thought PGs was an okay concept. Either he doesn't respect this site or he doesn't respect the craft Bc that was unacceptable. Pinot had a dope concept and is prolly upset he had to use it now instead of waiting but it prob would've been used by next week. Pinot won easily.


Bags vs Bash

Bash arm bars was just weird. Just weird fam. Like arm bars really? Isn't it bear armS? You have the right to bare arm. Nah fam. Bags toss a round? When has a mentors been referred to as a round? You guys were just off. Bash won here. The 1-2 for bags is more of a struggle than 315.


Blanco vs Innovator

Blanco this was ok bar. A bit corny but I can dig it. Any bar about smashing someone's girl I'm a fan of. Innovator did you and Aww Shit go to the library and bounce ideas off each other? Taste victory? Trash. The only reason Inno won is Bc of Blanco's music video. He's still paying the price of respect for that.


Destroyer vs Witty

Destroyer lol wit knees was cool no doubt. You were what 26 when The Bodyguard came out? Witty I liked copping gats for poppin gats rhyme. The heaters concept is kinda played and punch didn't have enough sting. Des won easily I'm sure.


Infiltrate vs Cred

Infiltrate this was cool, I liked the execution. Didn't like Willis so much but holes in your core was nice. Cred this was cool for swag & flow I dig it. Infiltrate wins here.



Diablo vs 2tripple

Diablo this was ok, kinda disappointed it ended with an idiomatic phrase. 2trip I'm ok with a general type of bar as long as it's creative. This was a bit stale. Innovator won this but I'm sure it was close. I didn't check the votes.


Orc vs YDK

Orc you had a nice concept but it fell flat to me lol like the titties part was just silly. You could've cleaned this up. YDK whoa man, awful bar. First off all it sounds very gay. He tried to grapple you but couldn't get hard? Orc hard and Orchard is easily the worst nameplay in the history of text and its not even close. Orc won by a body.


Header vs Schadenfreude

Header - nah fam not this time, you love current events though
Schade - good concept, liked the delivery my only gripe is you should've said "I'll put the paddle on the pupil"



Cyrax Vs Aero
by allen

This was a real close match, Cyrax nameplay was pretty nice imo, i thought it was creative. Aero had a funny line w/ the whole bench jawn an bags. The votes went back & forth a little but then swang towards cyrax's way. He picked up the win here.




Power Ranks


1. Infiltration

2. Bash

3. Destroyer

4. Cyrax

5. Schadenfreude

6. Orc

7. Fagcotic

8. Pinot Grij

9. Aero

10. Bags


Honorable mention: Cred, Hush

Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:29 PM
https://usatftw.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/ufc.gif?w=1000


Top Punches
In no Order


Infiltration

gunbar bully? only til I pull up w/ the larger weapon; get bombed in seconds
fight til your Willis gone then see my team put drills to ur core, that's Armageddon


Orc

maaan YDK the kinda slob girls don't invite to the dance;
type to hear Gyno.. & think because he got Man Boobs there might be a chance


Cyrax

You can tell he's a queer... i'll leave him wet with a mag,
Once shells hit. you'll see this fruit starburst into pieces an left in a bag



Barcotic

some advice? don't fuck w/ mike, ur nothin like a badmon
everything u claim is a con,cert... stop typin punches like ur AT one



Destroyer


vest up. don't mean shit cuz des is gunning w/the shotty hard
& when u hear wit knees hit, trust it won't be from the bodyguard


Schadenfreude

this a lesson in punching, I see u try'n damn, can’t deny it fam,
should’ve saw it coming tho, now I have to paddle on a pupil - this an eye exam.


Pinot Grij


You’re a piece of shit, Shit – you deserve to die, no reason behind it
Don’t mean to Sully your image, I just hope you’re in a plane crash and he’s not the pilot






No Show Shine


Maximus


bitch, your defeat was predicted.. I'll leave this singer broken
we all knew you wood finish bad like inferior timber coatings


Chemist

Arrivederci smirk, there's no longer room for those in the bottom of the barrel.
hollow tip shots quick to put lotto in a box, ..that's italian foot apparel.


Greed


Stfu about my people, speak on my mans one time
And a killing spree going down, all from 1 damn punchline

Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:29 PM
http://static3.thesportsterimages.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/hardybomb-anim.gif

Previews

Bash 2-0 Vs Infiltration 2-0

This could def be BOTW right here, Last week bash picked up a big win vs bags but both bars weren't great tbh he needs to step it up here if he wants to win cuz he's versing Inf & i thought last week's bar was fire even tho i did a willis play before him lol but naw is jawn was dope he stepped it up from the first week & showed he got bars. I think this will be close but i got inf w/ the dub his bars are way harsher than bash's but anything can happen here.
Winner= Inf 60/40


Cyrax 2-0 Vs Chyeahhh!!! 2-0

This could be a good battle or can be onesided, the dude cyrax been droppin pretty nice bars the past 2 weeks tbh idk who he is but he got bars, just picked up a nice win vs aero who is good an contender for the title. Chyeahhh gonna have to drop nice cuz hes been winning but just sneakin by w/ ok bars. He hasn't dropped anything dope yet. I think cyrax wins this cuz dude dont seem like he'll slack so chyeahh step it up.
Winner=Cyrax 60/40


Destroyer 2-0 Vs Schadenfreude 1-1

This jawn can def be BOTW, both dropped nice last week, this will be dumb close in the votes imo. Des dropped a pretty good N/P on wit last week, hes in a nice stride right now. Schad drop fire last week frfr. I think this can go either way but i feel like schad will get this one i don't think he'll slack and drop something tough but des can win also he got the skills to match, this one to hard to call, g/l to both.
Winner= 50/50 anyones ball game

Bags 1-1 Vs Diablo 1-1

This is gonna be a lowkey fire battle. I think diablo is just shakin rust off an he might be good right now & drop nice but i think bags will be out for blood after last week. I feel like he slept on bash an paid for it but this week i don't think he will on lars. If both drops to there abilities this will be dope af. I think bags will pull out the win here cuz hes more well rounded battler than lars but shit i wouldn't be surprised if shit went different.
Winner=Bags 60/40


Aero 1-1 Vs Witty 1-1

Another dope battle, geez this week about to be fire. I feel like both are gonna come out swinging this week cuz of the losses they took last week. I hope that motivates them to drop some serious bars. Wit can come up w/ some creative shit, he gonna have to here. Aero been droppin alot of comedy bars alot lately which is cool i like'em but i feel like he'll come w/ a haymaker here. This one is mad close. I think Aero will win tbh.
Winner=Aero 55/45


Cred 1-1 Vs Pinot Grij 1-1

Nice battle here, i like the style clash. Cred is coming off a loss to inf but dude drop really dope so its nothin to be ashamed about but i did feel like cred slacked a lil in that battle tbh, dont sleep here i kno u got bars bruh. Pinot is nice w/ it i liked his bar last week thought it was creative, he needs to drop nice here to win. This one can be real nice & close battle. I think pinot gets the victory here but cred can win it also, cuz this can come down to style preference.
Winner=Pinot 55/45


Bracotic 1-0 Vs Orc 1-0


This can be a BOTW contender, i thought both there bars last week were good. Orc is dope he got bars for years & his wording is to smooth, them jawns just hit nice. He is one of the biggest threats to champ an maybe win the whole season. Faggot is good also if he wasn't sucha winy bitch i'd say some nice things but the soul just won't let me. All he'll do is if he loses he'll call eveyone a d/r faggots if he wins he'll some how say somthing about the votes not being good enough or some gay shit in his canadian pussy language that sounds like a wisconsin house wife. This one will be close tho either one can take this win, its to close to call. G/l to orc & faggot.
Winner=50/50 anyone can take it

Greed 1-0 Vs Maximus 1-0


Max n/s bar last week was solid imo he doesn't seem really rusty. He always does well in the 1-2 every season so i see him making a title run this year. Greed is ight, i wasn't feelin his bar last week tbh, idk if it was just a n/s bar or serious but it was really old concept but who kno's he could drop good this week. I think max wins this one hes just overall more well rounded battler than greed. Hopefully greed surprises an drop nice tho.
Winner= Maximus 60/40

Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:29 PM
https://66.media.tumblr.com/11e6beaa7de0acc5ac64216e5a494e03/tumblr_no5kx6Nm9u1sbzhteo1_400.gif


Innovator 1-1 Vs Kin 1-1p

This will be close both are at about the same skill level. Kin had a real good bar the first week of the season but last one wasn't so good. I think he'll step it up this week hopefully. Innovator is pretty decent & he's been droppin solid so far. This one is really hard to pick a winner but i think Innovator takes this hes coming off a win.
Winner=Inno 55/45


2tripple0 0-2 Vs Bishop Blanco 0-2

Bishop has concepts but his wordin is hurtin him for them jawns to hit, sometimes less is more bruh, ur being a little to wordy. 2 is gettin better i think hes gettin the idea now but needs to work on creativity & harshness but hes coming along. I got blanco here, he just better at the moment.
Winner=Bishop 70/30


Awww Shit 0-2 Vs Hearder Hearder 0-2

This is a weird one lol, we got faggot lip hemsworth & dude that kinda stuck in the past w/ bars. Aww wording is solid but his concepts are really dated needs to work on that think outside the box & don't be lazy. lip pratt is ok but always using concepts that no one gets lol like he seen some shit on twitter it got 1000 retweets & hes like boom thats a concept ppl will know smh. I got him gettin his first & only win of the season here tho.
Winner=liptopher columbus 55/45


Certain 0-1 Vs YDK 0-1


YDK stepped up & battled last min last week props to him but he dropped a super forced line on orc tbh, stay away from that cuz u seem like u can drop some bars. Certain imo had a dope concept last week if he worded it better & took his time instead of droppin it like a hr after i posted his battle if coulda been fire. I think he takes this one here he has bars.
Winner=Certain 60/40


Fraze 0-0 Vs Adonis 0-0

Last time fraze was battling he was doin pretty solid in the NBL, he had some good verses. Idk how rusty he is tho, i haven't seen him battle in awhile. Adonis idk wat skill level hes at tbh i never seen any bars from him hopefully hes good. I got fraze winning this cuz i kno what he can do.
Winner=Fraze 70/30


Chemist 1-0 Vs Slechtn 0-0

Chem had a ok n/s line last week hopefully it was just for a n/s win. I haven't really read anything from him besides that one, maybe he can prove me wrong an drop nice. Slechtn i don't remember tbh but he said he was here before but idk what kinda skill level hes at. I'ma go w/ chem cuz i seen a bar from him already but yah'll try to drop some fire.
Winner=chem 70/30


Hush 0-0 Vs R!cantheroyz 0-0

We got in one corner hush the dope hoffer he got bars, foreal any all types he can mix it up w/ personals, funny shit & gun bars...dude is lethal & a threat to champ an win the season. He's up against R!can whos been doin live battles recent there pretty solid to, last time i seen him txt he was decent but this is a tough task for him cuz he's gonna have to drop fuego to win here. I got Hush takin the dub tho.
Winner=Hush 70/30



ALTE 0-0 Vs TeckNeek 0-0

Never heard of either of these guys tbh so i can't really call the winner. Hopefully they both bring fire & impress all of us, g/l to both.
Winner=50/50 anyones to take

Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:30 PM
Sexy Chicks


http://798ba1b174f0e6a04a8efe01.thevladarcompany.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/JoJo-Babie.jpeg
http://cs424917.vk.me/v424917565/5579/I7HJfj5pAXM.jpg
http://www.cronacadiretta.it/files/album/289/mirgaeva_galinka_instagram_02.jpg
http://tiemposmafufos.com/hosting/upload/big/2015/05/05/554938a557255.jpg
https://bossip.files.wordpress.com/2015/10/draya-michele-tori-hughes.jpg?w=700
http://66.media.tumblr.com/0ebd06398cae6fdcbf0b29c8525e6529/tumblr_npdnxfaagb1rkxra2o1_500.jpg
https://s-media-***he-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/47/bd/d9/47bdd96ae5864df71f45efa88a19bb56.jpg
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http://picture-cdn.wheretoget.it/u584dw-l-610x610-blouse-clothes-midi+skirt-gold+belt-crop-stripes-black-club+outfit-birthday-heels-going-dress-sheer-mesh-bra-purple-gold-form+fitting-instagram-twitter-tumblr-club-skirt-pear+body-.jpg
http://i0.wp.com/admin.thenet.ng/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/demi-rose-15-481x600.png?resize=481%2C600
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Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:30 PM
Dope Mixtapes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-AMlEbFAy0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xwb-t0vNq9I
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUl7phkMCqg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INR80m99848
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fclxa7zPVFE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc9vbC4iJ44







WTF'S

WTF@ 4 teams winning by one point on sunday, crazy shit.
WTF@ the pats winning w/ out brady & gronk vs the cards, smh.
WTF@ all the fucked up 9/11 memes on the net, loll no chill
WTF@ all the sign ins this week
WTF@ ppl n/s one bar battle LOL wack
WTF@ half the ppl on line thinkin Cm Punk would win or even go the distance LOLLL





http://stillrealtous.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/swantonbomb3.gif



outro

There u have it yah goons, That wraps up another fire week of the most official magazine on the net. The 1-2 is startin to look real dope right now, yah'll just keep votin & showin, this bitch will be a real ill 16 weeks. Try to spread the word to ppl to join, lets get this shit packed w/ talent. Shout out to Aero again for writin up the reviews. From yah homie AK im out this bitch pz.

Hearder Hearder
09-12-2016, 09:32 PM
This was a good one

Except the battle reviews were lazy all it was was aeros votes copy and pasted lmao

Allen Knight
09-12-2016, 09:35 PM
Stfu, its a one bar league, what u want a novel u weirdo.

Cred
09-12-2016, 09:40 PM
Dope mag famlay

Certain
09-12-2016, 09:43 PM
Thank you.

Inno
09-12-2016, 09:56 PM
Another dope effort. Thanks for the read.

Props bro

Barcotic
09-12-2016, 10:01 PM
Barcotic had a nice concept but technically it doesn't make sense. You don't text in caps to convey you're in a loud place you text in caps to express yelling
exactly and u have to yell at a concert

that was the concept, duuuh

Barcotic
09-12-2016, 10:02 PM
good shit tho

better than knowp's mags lol

Hush
09-12-2016, 11:52 PM
Nice

Appreciate it

Ghost1
09-13-2016, 01:08 AM
Bash congratulated me for beating him as soon as I dropped my bar lol


Mentos don't need to be referred.to as rounds for the punch to work ....they r fuckin round



Please let's not give credence to what cronus thinks does and doesn't work. He's shit tier.



An any other weirdo Comments on why my bar didn't work....

I have his mother ....he now has to choose whether I kill her....or he kills himself


Vote against me fine

Bug do so with valid reason. U cornballs GARBAGE

I'M THE FUCKIN GOD OF THIS TEXT SHJT

PUT SUM RESPCK ON MY FUGGIN NAME OUT YEA

Allen Knight
09-13-2016, 02:18 AM
TALK TO THESEEE NIGGASSSS!!!!

https://media.giphy.com/media/PuQYUSzijBb1e/giphy.gif

Barcotic
09-13-2016, 05:15 AM
labeling literally anything circular as a round to make a concept is dumb n lazy af

so "talk to these niggas" all u want but u wrong

n stupid

Barcotic
09-13-2016, 05:23 AM
like

I'll hit u w/ a round between posts, that's a soccer ball

took me all of 2 seconds to think of that cuz it's whack af, just like ur mentos bs

Ghost1
09-13-2016, 06:53 AM
This is coming from the genius that brought us such doosies as Jean grey/grey jeans, kitchen counter terrorism, CON,cert & other such complex jewels

Cronus the thinking man's textcee lol

That's how I'd describe him for sure.........if I want to read some really creative and smart punches I know that I need only look as far as the nearest Barcotic battle

Definitely

So let's not waste his time w simplistic comparisons anymore

If the punch doesn't require u to switch ur sig or avy to help u sway the votes and explain ur punch to voters then it's fuckin worthless



BUT SERIOUSLY I'M NOT TRYING TO CON CERT I'M JUST AT ONE RIGHT NOW SO I HAVE TO TYPE REALLY LOUDLY ON THE COMPUTER W CAPS SO THAT EVERY1 ELSE WHO IS AT THE CONCERT CAN HEAR MY WORDS WHEN THEY READ THEM CUZ THEY WOULD READ THEM OUT LOUD. THEY HAVE NO INNER MONOLOGUE. PLUS CUZ IN THE MORNING I WAS AT A STAND OFF W COUNTER TERRORISM ....I WAS TERRORIZED BY THE COFFEE MAKER. Can't con cert. I'm at one.

Aero
09-13-2016, 07:18 AM
Dead

Slechtn
09-13-2016, 09:48 AM
that first asian on the pic though. damn who is she

nice mag knight

Barcotic
09-13-2016, 12:25 PM
ya u sure got me there bags

tldr

Ghost1
09-13-2016, 12:35 PM
Oh please. Every1 knows u fucking read it. Twice. U LOOK REAL COOL RIGHT NOW THO...I DON'T EVEN CARE BAGS I DIDN'T READ IT ......BUT I WAS UP AT 4AM RESPONDING AND READING EVERY POST U EVER WROTE

seems legit fagot cornbal

Barcotic
09-13-2016, 12:40 PM
that didn't happen

but k

fagt

Pinot Grij
09-13-2016, 01:45 PM
Ak says he's gonna post the mag tonight. Ak actually posts the mag that night. Ak is a good mod. Nice mag.

Aero
09-13-2016, 02:47 PM
Ak says he's gonna post the mag tonight. Ak actually posts the mag that night. Ak is a good mod. Nice mag.

Give me some rep fam I feel like you have enough rep power to take me to green.

Cred
09-13-2016, 02:50 PM
I almsot hit u wit sum rep Aero , if that counts

Aero
09-13-2016, 02:51 PM
Appreciate it. You're at 57 mil that will def help.

Hearder Hearder
09-13-2016, 03:00 PM
Yeah I gave up on the green rep dream a long time ago

Pancake sealed my fate

Barcotic
09-13-2016, 03:04 PM
I prefer the red

Ghost1
09-13-2016, 03:15 PM
typical reds smh

Hearder Hearder
09-13-2016, 03:22 PM
Aero why did they remove you from the hall of fame here?

Witty
09-13-2016, 08:06 PM
rep check.

Witty
09-13-2016, 08:06 PM
god damn.

Useless
09-14-2016, 02:59 AM
Repped Aero for the many sig lulz

sral
09-14-2016, 07:27 AM
lmao i remember Chyeahhh keeps a "NO'S" list for people he negs on sight

i kinda fuck with that idea

Barcotic
09-14-2016, 10:03 AM
posted Orc

gl

Witty
09-14-2016, 07:16 PM
Whoever negged me....LOOK AT MY REP...IT'S STILL HIGH AS FUCK.....YOU CAN NOT HURT ME!!!!

Cyrax
09-16-2016, 12:42 AM
This was a really good mag man, thanks for the read