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veritas
07-12-2017, 01:07 AM
Oxford. Cambridge. Harvard. Yale.
The educated elite replete with fail
compete to eat, no sleep in this jail
all pride to coincide with never tucking the tail
we are the sociopaths, we fuck and assail
we are the law, see us see saw on the scale
But They Live with plenty of bubble gum
speaking the frequencies of subtle scum
every day in every way getting dumber than dumb
turn on, tune in, tune out, get numb, then succumb
you hear the wardrums hum, but you would rather turn and run
so the blind remain blind and prophet cuts out his tongue.

NYCSPITZ
07-12-2017, 02:52 AM
much better

PancakeBrah
07-22-2017, 09:37 PM
The rhymes are like a B-Side to a white rastafarian's Def Poetry audioton. Content okay. Maybe trying too hard.

Mr. J
08-01-2017, 01:16 AM
Impressive work in such a short display
the bubble gum/subtle scum was funny fun.
otherwise I felt that you could add to this.
display your printing & how its written up.
either way I enjoyed that whole midsection
awkward work near the end though...
a perfect blend of idea and the prophesied

2tripple0
09-16-2017, 12:43 AM
I likedthending of this it was also veryasy on rhe eyes which is good a nice easy read with lots of meaning and i dont know wasnt lacking that much i guess rhyme scheme coulda been a bit stronger but i think it all meshed quite reasonably... goood drop yo....