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View Full Version : ITT: Criminals Unite. Lets talk about your rap sheets.


Geno
04-14-2018, 12:58 PM
Of course im no criminal. Upstanding citizen nowadays. But...

Pick your most trying criminal offense that either jailed you or had you on the edge thinking you might do some time. We all have SOMETHING. Even if its a traffic ticket EVERYONE has broken law at least once lol.

So i caught a dui back in 07. Had my case moved from district to circuit court on behalf of my lawyers advice to get out from in front of the judge that would be before me in district court. Apparently that particular judge had a hard on for alcohol related teaffic offenses due to his son being killed in an incident related to drunk driving.

Lawyer said idc if your first offense this guy is drop the hammer on your head. Best to move up to circuit court. So i did.

Went in front of judge Pamela North who gave me a year probation. Well of course my drinking ass wasnt done. Went out pissed one night after arguing with the old lady at the time.. Got drunk. Hopped in mynoldsmobile LSS 1999 model. Last year it was made. Well. Needless to say a month after buying the car i totalled iy. Was doing 120 over a bridge ans didnt see the black envoy ahead at all. Well my tire blew. Sent my shooting accross lanes into oncoming traffic. It was late so no cars coming. But i was on a two way bridge and richoted off the one wall back accross swiping the fuck out of the gmc envoy and then damn near going off the bridge into the chesapeake. Somehow my car went from on the wall back to the road and i continued driving like holy fuck. Had a homie in the car with me. I lulled off on another rd and he jumped out and changed my tire to the spare. Well my drunk ass went right back the way i had come and police were there waiting for me. Caught dwi. Leaving scene. And several other driving citations. Several. What an idiot. Right? Ik wtf.

Woke up in jail. Car totalled. Went before pamela north again and ended up.doing my year back up time. In 08. Smh. Stupid as fuck. Needless to say. Thank god ive matured a bit and dont no more. Im a mess when i drink man. Especially back then. Anyway..

Who else has a story?

Elemental P
04-14-2018, 01:03 PM
I'm sure Hush the biggest baddest most gangster Gucci gang here. Breaking the law is stupid and I hope they all get shot while trying to pick they pants up faggots.

Geno
04-14-2018, 01:07 PM
Lmnop

Elemental P
04-14-2018, 01:09 PM
Nah I ain't the much a dick but foreal. People who break the law know what they're doing.
I smoke weed and pop pills I'm prescribed that's it. I have Itlian and Irish in me and I still sway from.the bullshit.

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 01:11 PM
Lmaoooo

Lol @ I'm Italian n Irish so I'm genetically predisposed

don't mk me eat u

Don't knock a Niggas hustle we all don't live with moms

Geno
04-14-2018, 01:14 PM
Nah I ain't the much a dick but foreal. People who break the law know what they're doing.
I smoke weed and pop pills I'm prescribed that's it. I have Itlian and Irish in me and I still sway from.the bullshit.

Ok. Big ups to the law abiding citizen. I commend you. Srs. But most of us have had something.

I feel the same way btw. Im to old for the dumb shit man. Have had enough of it in my lifetime. Believe me

GUDELJ
04-14-2018, 01:21 PM
Good thread, I’ll be tuning in the whole way through.

Geno
04-14-2018, 01:22 PM
Ya idk. Was bored. Thought maybe some lolz would be had. Seems no one wants to play. Whatever.

Delete thread.

Elemental P
04-14-2018, 01:23 PM
Yea I got stories and done stupid shit. We all have. I don't have to air it. I've had guns pulled on me before, that ain't gangsta. Some boys tried jumping my cuzin and got ran the fuck over. They we're all jacked on meth too. Something Muffin knows all about right g

Geno
04-14-2018, 01:27 PM
I wasnt talking bout gangsta shit man lol. Thats a whole different story. I was talking bout actual court shit thats documented. That u been through maybe learbed something from. Real shit. Not braggin or talking about your gangsta

Elemental P
04-14-2018, 01:52 PM
I wasnt talking bout gangsta shit man lol. Thats a whole different story. I was talking bout actual court shit thats documented. That u been through maybe learbed something from. Real shit. Not braggin or talking about your gangsta

Getting caught slipping ain't cool. Got friends that did too. Only thing I ever had to go to court for is not having insurance on my fuckin car lmao.

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 02:18 PM
Geno I've done and am currently doiing wild shit but never been hemmed up

Never been locked up for a good amount of time .. Not even a week

So I've lucked out

Only decent charge I caught I got expunged due to have a connect thru fam w/ the D.A where I was

Should of seen Niggas faces at. What was it thr 2nd appearance after pretrial when the notorious D.A gestured me of all ppl to come speak to him before my shit could even pop off

A handshake and a " don't want to see you again young man" later?

Out that bih

Thk god for well to do relatives that accomadated that old fart on many occasions

~RustyGunZ~
04-14-2018, 02:23 PM
don't mk me eat u


https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b2/ab/25/b2ab257a739eb5d0e361316db03c636d.gif

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 02:25 PM
Lmao Knucklehead

Hey seth xD

u mk me grin sometimes no homo

Flow
04-14-2018, 02:39 PM
My teacher brought up my dad once, sore subject an so i dropped the nut on him. Got put under house arrest for it being a first time offence. Was slick played alot of xbox etc. Then my mum cut the chord on me an so I started having the neighbour girl round to listen music an spy on the neighbours. Became totally obsessed that my one neighbour was some serial killer type because i have dillusions of grandeur an paranoia. Anyway bloke caught me one day so he starts banging my mum. Wasnt cool with that so broke my house arrest. This went on for a while an I was on last warning after breaking into the guys house. In the end he was a murderer so they give me a early release for good behaviour.

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 02:43 PM
My teacher brought up my dad once, sore subject an so i dropped the nut on him


Pause




must be a Welsh thing coz iono wtf that means other than u bussing on a nigga

Elemental P
04-14-2018, 02:46 PM
I spent one night in jail that's it. Petty larceny.

Flow
04-14-2018, 03:01 PM
Pause




must be a Welsh thing coz iono wtf that means other than u bussing on a nigga

Lol means headbuttin in uk

Danze
04-14-2018, 03:04 PM
Lol means headbuttin in uk

The ol' "Port Talbot Nod".

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 03:13 PM
Lol means headbuttin in uk


"Nut" here = semen or one of your balls

For ex : Catch this nut = bih waiting for u to ejaculate on her eager mouth n tongue

Man I miss her :( gawdddd

Lotta hoes cum shy

Cept the ones u don't give af about

Flow
04-14-2018, 03:43 PM
"Nut" here = semen or one of your balls

For ex : Catch this nut = bih waiting for u to ejaculate on her eager mouth n tongue

Man I miss her :( gawdddd

Lotta hoes cum shy

Cept the ones u don't give af about

Yeah you can bust yo nut in a girl to mean same thing. But sroppin the nut is totally different thing.

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 04:03 PM
Lmao " bust yo nut"

Haha I love you guys

You guys across the pond or an endearing but odd lot

Enbombz
04-14-2018, 04:36 PM
We created the language you just bastardised it.

Diode
04-14-2018, 04:47 PM
it helps to know and/or be related to ppl

Geno
04-14-2018, 04:52 PM
My teacher brought up my dad once, sore subject an so i dropped the nut on him. Got put under house arrest for it being a first time offence. Was slick played alot of xbox etc. Then my mum cut the chord on me an so I started having the neighbour girl round to listen music an spy on the neighbours. Became totally obsessed that my one neighbour was some serial killer type because i have dillusions of grandeur an paranoia. Anyway bloke caught me one day so he starts banging my mum. Wasnt cool with that so broke my house arrest. This went on for a while an I was on last warning after breaking into the guys house. In the end he was a murderer so they give me a early release for good behaviour.

Lol yhis sounds a lot like the movie disturbia lmfao

Geno
04-14-2018, 04:54 PM
Yo lmmfaoooo im so dead at dropoing the nut on that nigga hahahahaha wtf yo lmmfaoooo

El Muffin
04-14-2018, 05:11 PM
it helps to know and/or be related to ppl

Indeed.

Otherwise I'd have a record rtf now

Flow
04-15-2018, 04:23 AM
Lol yhis sounds a lot like the movie disturbia lmfao

Glad someone clicked

sral
04-15-2018, 04:58 AM
Pause




must be a Welsh thing coz iono wtf that means other than u bussing on a nigga

lmao in Wales they drop their nut in sheep

Geno
04-15-2018, 08:14 AM
Finna buss my nut on you sralars
No homo

El Muffin
04-15-2018, 03:40 PM
lmao in Wales they drop their nut in sheep

Headbutting sheep or inseminating

Or both

Hard to keep up with u niggas but I'm trying xD

Hush
04-15-2018, 05:09 PM
I'm sure Hush the biggest baddest most gangster Gucci gang here. Breaking the law is stupid and I hope they all get shot while trying to pick they pants up faggots.

You got a problem you lil bitch

El Muffin
04-15-2018, 05:20 PM
You got a problem you lil bitch

My man tryna tell me he gave me that smoke in that pic battle in the BA in pms

"I could post dis at different sites n get a different result"

Where

Oh that site where 5 of its esteemed legends bounced n came here?

LetsBeef and Illesty?

How about I mention some of your idols who got statues erected there n they over here chillin now may not post often coz life Yknow or they locked up (sho for example)

xD I love these yougyiins they always got the same hook

Wut they don't know won't hurt em

History lesson is needed lol

Amen
04-15-2018, 06:27 PM
My man tryna tell me he gave me that smoke in that pic battle in the BA in pms

"I could post dis at different sites n get a different result"

Where

Oh that site where 5 of its esteemed legends bounced n came here?

LetsBeef and Illesty?

How about I mention some of your idols who got statues erected there n they over here chillin now may not post often coz life Yknow or they locked up (sho for example)

xD I love these yougyiins they always got the same hook

Wut they don't know won't hurt em

History lesson is needed lol

What so called legends from LB? I bodied all of their top Dawgs there in long bar after a 4 year hiatus in like 08 lolol...

Trademark was the username there, peep game.

~RustyGunZ~
04-15-2018, 07:04 PM
What so called legends from LB? I bodied all of their top Dawgs there in long bar after a 4 year hiatus in like 08 lolol...

Trademark was the username there, peep game.

veritas in case you’re still cataloging this behavior

Amen
04-15-2018, 07:25 PM
veritas in case you’re still cataloging this behavior

Nah, he stopped like a week ago.

And yeah, it's truth - which is why I dropped the username. Go look faggot.

I beat everyone whos reputation was considered "great" back then.

This was in like 08/09 tho...

~RustyGunZ~
04-15-2018, 07:30 PM
My friend once threw a cat against the wall because someone told him if he didn’t he was soft.

That cat was the “great”est cat there.

GUDELJ
04-15-2018, 07:52 PM
veritas in case you’re still cataloging this behavior

Amen
04-15-2018, 08:42 PM
Oh word.

Chill Phil
04-15-2018, 10:16 PM
Haven't been arrested or handcuffed.

The closest to it I've gotten though was when I beat up my "liberty buddy," when we were in Japan. This happened the day after I had to go all Denzel Washington and storm a brothel to find him after disappearing for hours.

Anyways, the next night we went out drinking in the "honch" and we ran into some royal Navy dudes. I was talking to a chick, and his hating ass was trying to get her guy friends to fight me. They decided that I was cool but didn't like him, so they bounced. When I finally snapped and was like "why in the fuck did you cock block?" He exclamed that he would beat my ass. And he kept talking shit until I finally agreed to see him outside.


I talked him into having one more drink beforehand, and he slammed his down and continued talking shit while I sipped mine and think about how I was gonna handle it. I decided I was gonna uppercut him and knock him smooth the fuck out, cause he was drunk as fuck, and it would've been easy.to accomplish.

I finish my drink and we go outside. At this point I still didn't think anything was gonna happen. I'm walking in front of him, we get to a parking lot, and I turn around to face him. Dude's fist was already halfway at my head when I turned around. But it was a sloppy haymaker that landed on my skull about an inch above my left ear. I thought he broke his hand for sure.

I backed up from him about four feet and squared up. His drunk ass was like "yeeeaaaah," and he started hopping towards me. I noticed he was hopping a little too high and his legs were a little too rubbery for me to not go low. So, I timed his hop for right when his feet left the ground and Muay Thai shin kicked just above his ankle. As hard as I possibly could and with beautiful form (from the waist)

Dude almost did a full cartwheel in the air, and landed on his head! I got on top of him and rained down a right to his temple. I cocked back again to let loose some serious ground and pound, but when I cocked back, he curled up in a ball.

Then j realized that dude was my best friend and he was already submitting...so I got up and started yelling at him to get up and that he was fucking stupid. Then the military police came around the corner....

warthog.
04-16-2018, 01:54 AM
hmmmm, I killed prostitutes, ran over cops, and drop kicked pedestrians.

oh wait, that was in GTA.

El Muffin
04-16-2018, 02:10 AM
Quick! Throw a pokeball at it!

uh-oh
04-16-2018, 08:52 AM
Late to thread but i have 0 shit on my record after turning 18. Just a speeding ticket.

Misdemeanor assault as a juvenile which was to be wiped if i did community service and kept a homework journal which was my "sentence" in teen court where i was hilarious and killed with a jury of my peers

#thuggin

uh-oh
04-16-2018, 08:54 AM
I was also arrested a couple times but nothing came of it as a kid. B and e as a youth but we didnt break in the door was open. Just an abandone building we trashed lol. Also shot a bb gun at neighbors moving in but played it off like i was shooting at birds which i was also told was illegal but just had to apologise and had the bn gun taken

Ghost1
04-16-2018, 01:43 PM
I knew this thread wasn't for me from the title but first 5 posts itt furiously confirmed my suspicions at warp speed LMFAO

GUDELJ
04-16-2018, 02:49 PM
Stfu stupid idiot you ain’t shit

Ghost1
04-16-2018, 03:01 PM
introduce me to urself homie fagot

GUDELJ
04-16-2018, 03:07 PM
How about I introduce this cock to your whole family

Chill Phil
04-16-2018, 03:24 PM
How about I introduce this cock to your whole family

He has a daughter. And you'll surely go to prison and be targeted by the inmates for doing anything like that.

Ghost1
04-16-2018, 04:19 PM
thanks seadad that was helpful

Ghost1
04-16-2018, 04:27 PM
imagine my dismay when I search thru posts for 5min of my life only to find out that this fagot is penis pump mouth himself? zelph!? WHO TF CHANGED THIS FAGOTS NAME BACK

Allen Knight

El Muffin
04-16-2018, 04:38 PM
This nigga come back tryna run pockets

SMFH

ill nik-A
04-16-2018, 06:06 PM
Never caught A’s a juvenile. Plus I ain’t swearing shit here

Fuck dat. Pussy lips a cop. I’m good.