Any cooking job I go to, I'm instantly the man.

[Strikta]

I got skills w/ that blade & open flame BUT.. that ain't why.

I'm a charming motherfucker doe.

Already got this little thing grindin' all up on my meat in the storage room.. she badddd too sonnys.

I don't flirt tho.. I'm mean to them bitches & they love that shit. U can't be nice to these hoes.. they'll just think u a weak mufucka.

Everywhere I go bro... iono what it is.... they just can't resist.

[Split]

being nice works if u can pull It off right

[Boredom]

Aha word strik, I worked in a few kitchens cooking years back. Earls was that shit, soo many lil hunnies that were dtf

[El Muffin]

they cant resist that minty fresh breath homie

kills 99 percent of germs

[Boredom]

Bleach splashed

[Bodey]

she sounds liek a whore but get it

i never understood that either. girls being attracted to straight dickheads. i couldnt give a shit less about them. but it is true i have less of a reaction toward someone when they're super nice to me. especially the overly-nice ones. dickheads stick out more, they catch your attention. for some reason, girls need their approval. and mistakenly think sleeping with them is gonna get that. ahh to be young

i like me a good playful dickhead. the ones who arent totally mean and awful to a point of being turned off, but the annoying ones. that you like to argue with. that you can laugh with while being annoyed with them at the same time. couldnt get enough of that dumb shit. why oh why.

[El Muffin]

i need to start disrespecting these bitches man

strikta help a nigga out



srs im too nice to these chicks


all on how you were raised i suppose

[Strikta]

she sounds liek a whore but get it

i never understood that either. girls being attracted to straight dickheads. i couldnt give a shit less about them. but it is true i have less of a reaction toward someone when they're super nice to me. especially the overly-nice ones. dickheads stick out more, they catch your attention. for some reason, girls need their approval. and mistakenly think sleeping with them is gonna get that. ahh to be young

i like me a good playful dickhead. the ones who arent totally mean and awful to a point of being turned off, but the annoying ones. that you like to argue with. that you can laugh with while being annoyed with them at the same time. couldnt get enough of that dumb shit. why oh why.

U make a legit point.. the approval thing sounds about right. I USED to be nice to the waitresses & shit when I was younger... not anymore tho lol.. shit gets u nowhere & more than likely in the end they'll try to take advantage of u somehow mistaking ur kindness for weakness. Fuck that.

At my last job I made this girl cry because she was just a fuckin' moron & I got tired of her fucking up.. always on her phone when we were busy. I told her put that motherfucking phone away & tell that bitch ass nigga on the other end to quit calling u and coming up here or I'ma punish him. She put her phone in her apron & looked at me like I had 3 heads for like a minute straight. I said bitch u can quit starin at me like a fuckin idiot & run this food, or wipe a wall or something round this motherfucker. lmao this bitch got mad & tried to yell so I hit her w/ the 2 words nobody wanna here... ur fired. Tell me why she flips out & tells me her bf gonna be up here to beat my ass.. I just lol'd & said whatever... she stormed outta there.. I cracked a beer.... dude never came.. he knew better.

But that one minute where she stared at me like that.... I could see in her soul... she wanted me inside her right at that very moment.

[Strikta]

Btw Bodey I would be ur playful dickhead. ;)

[uh-oh]

im too nice yo

get friend zoned

if it wasnt for booze, i would prolly still be a virgin. when i get drunk i'll ignore chicks. be pretty disrespectful. not like dissing them. but just not paying them no mind. till they get the heart to corner da god and from there its oh shitttt thats my wang

let goooo

im just kidding dont let go wtffffff

word

[Split]

sarcasm /thread

[uh-oh]

black chicks dig nice dudes tho

and or they just dig fresh white boys. they give it up way more

gotta go way outta your way to get a white girl. black girls go out of there way to get with you tho

IN MY EXPERIENCE

[Strikta]

I used to do the whole friend zone thing, it's all about that different approach nowadays tho.. I test the waters.. I get into the bitch head yo.

I'm like the Ted Bundy of the foodservice industry, but w/out the rape/murder/abductions.

[Strikta]

black chicks dig nice dudes tho

and or they just dig fresh white boys. they give it up way more

gotta go way outta your way to get a white girl. black girls go out of there way to get with you tho

IN MY EXPERIENCE

Never told no lie.

[Bodey]

But that one minute where she stared at me like that.... I could see in her soul... she wanted me inside her right at that very moment.

lmfao we like to get beaten, what can i say. and i'm not knockin the nice guys, really. i've met plenty of assholes out there that win over the bobble-headed sluts, but not any real self-respecting girls--the whole package if you will. and if they do, it's because they're nice to them in private lmao i'm dead serious. in public, they treat their asses like any other bitch and the girls just take it cuz they know they're gonna ride it out later on, literally. i got one guy chasin me right now and he's nice but being too nice makes me wanna run away cuz already i feel like he likes me way too much... so as a person who has mad intimacy issues, i run away from that shit. i've never been the type to get into relationships. i feel like a dude in that way sometimes, like after i have sex with someone, i'm gettin dressed and gettin the hell outta there. i dont ever spend the night. and the guy NEVER wants me to leave. they always want me to spend the night. nope. runnin away. i will not let you get close to me and fuck me over so goodbye hahaha wow i never really knew how to put it but that's what it is i think. bbut i mean, dont get me wrong, i've had cool fuck-buddies before. like literally buddies. and i've spent the night with them. we'd have sex, talk, have sex again, then talk til the sun rose. then get breakfast. but we understood that that's all it was, it was just sex. still had good ass conversations, i mean we really were buddies lol. i'll know who to let in my head when it comes though. but for now, fuck all nonsense that messes with your emotions. dont need that extra stress right now

i mean i see my firends and view their relationships and it's like a second fuckin job. very few have what i'd consider "normal" relationships. where they dont have to be with each other 24/7 or get into fights about where they were at 8:42 at night, and it's almost 9, and where the fuck were you, why didnt you text. bla bla bla. again, fuck that nonsense. find a loyal fuck buddy.

[uh-oh]

bodey just stop talking yo

you got da god chubbing over here

none of what you said is the truth because those girls dont existtttt

your like the female me

[Strikta]

U & me would get along perfect Bode.

Real talk.

[Bodey]

oh it's true, believe me, i just dont tell too many of my other girl friends about it. and neither does the fellow friend of benefits. that's the coolest fuckin part. the nonchalance, the sneakin around, and then still acting like friends cuz relaly, that's what you are. i wouldnt recommend choosing a fuck buddy from your regular group of friends that are girls though. you gotta fuck them right away and become friends. if not, you'll end up fucking taht one girl that you were friends with first and itll be awkward afterwards. learned that one the hard way.

drunk guy friend "wouldnt it be perfect if we fucked?! we've always been mad cool"
drunker me "yeah you're right. why wouldnt this be awesome"

next sober day
.........
.....

[Strikta]

I never understood the awkwardness thing.. it never has been awkward for me after I bang a chick.. unless it was a chick I already banged moms.

That was the only time where I legit felt awkward after stabbing. That dinner table was fuuucked up from the daughter to the mom & husband.. even the sister knew what was up.. I just kept my head down & stayed focused on my plate.

If ur pipe game is on point, there's no need to feel awkward.... u made that girl secrete bodily fluids from pleasure u brought her.. in my head I'm like 'yeeeaaahhh'.

[Bodey]

honestly, i dont understand the awkwardness either. it's probably the feeling of regret crowding the vibes of the room afterwards. cuz that friendship was never the same afterwards. took me months to feel normal arond him again. and of course, he tried way too hard to make it seem normal. like out of his way. which made it worse

and damn, you really are a mother fucker.

[Joe Metts]

I got the cool funny fat guy routine down packed.

Im a dickhead in a joking way mostly just my personality though. Sometimes i get friendzoned some times i don't. Doesn't matter cause female friends leads to other females. Works out. I know most this site doesn't think big dudes get laid but its false. Would never claim to be a pimp but i do fine. Even Frank doesn't understand how i get some of the women i do. Its all about be comfortable and making them feel comfortable. Im older now. Looking for something more solid. Not crazy worried about how fly she is or whatever.


Only job i ever got laid at was when i was managing at home depot. Overnights were the jumpppppp off.

[Bodey]

yeah, really, as long as you dont smell bad, your personality can make up for your physical cons. i've met super beautiful guys before that immediately became ugly to me because their personalities sucked me dry. and just cuz you're big, doesnt necessarily mean you're bad-looking. chris farley has always been cute to me, and he got huge before he died.

kevin james, the dude from king of queens, he's not bad looking at all and he's a big guy. but then again, both him and chris farley both have loveable personalities.

[Strikta]

It's funny.. I actually knew the mom of this girl first.. for like yeeears lol

I went to school w/ the girl tho.. I just never noticed her really.. but the mom I ended up working w/ when I was like 18... I didn't meet her daughter(again) til I was like 22-23.

I ended up being friends w/ the girl & coming over & partying w/ her & her family at their house.. like alot.. after work.. days off ect. We'd drink, smoke, do blow, cookout, just whatever.. PARTYING our asses off. Well me & the girl been going at it in the bedroom for a few weeks... mom knows this... she enlisted my services one night over 2 bottles of red wine & a gram of some reeeal good coke.. I couldn't bust so I was hitting it like allll night & morning til we had to go to work ina few hours.

After that, things weren't the same for me & hanging out w/ that family. Somebody ran they damn mouth.

[Strikta]

Word Joe I see ur type, I don't knock the big mans hustle lol ...do u.

I remember graveyard shift at 7-11... talk about the jumpoff forreaaal.

We used to rob the shit outta that place too.

Niggas fired me for stealing rolls of lottery tickets. wtf kinda shit is that?

[SiK]

smh

[Joe Metts]

http://imageshack.us/a/img42/7633/34018101502252006452575.jpg



Im sexy bodey. When i don't have my duck dynasty beard anyway lol

[Strikta]

So when'd u start fuckin' w/ photoshop, Joe?

[Joe Metts]

I don't get the question lol

[Bodey]

yeah, the beardlessness works for you, for sure. i can so see the big guy game

[Strikta]

U did something to that picture.

Ur face is thin.

rofl

[Joe Metts]

It's going soon. Tired of looking like i don't care how my face looks haha

[Joe Metts]

Nah man, would never stoop to that. Kinda offended. Like i aint a real g.


Here's the original pic.


http://imageshack.us/a/img210/4430/l7f2437c27b394d74bf4bf4.jpg

[Strikta]

Bro I am j/f w/ u. lmao

Come on now.

[Joe Metts]

That shit gets on my nerves lol

[uh-oh]

metts dont lose the beard bro

i feel like samson losing his hair whenever i trim mine

[Strikta]

What gets on ur nerves?

[Joe Metts]

This site acting like im permanent bedrest fat lol

And i got to uhoh. Pussy game literally has been doo doo since i grew this thing. Might get my first ever chin strap.

[Strikta]

lmsssoo

Dead@Bedrest fat for one.

For 2.. don't get a Cronus bro.. but if u do.. don't make it ultra thin & see thru.. it will look homo as fuck.

[Joe Metts]

My barber is the truth. He'll know what to do.

[Strikta]

Word.

Joe how bout them Wizards?

[uh-oh]

cavs ftw

my dude kyrie with the game winner earlier

but yea metts i feel you but at the same time these ho's dont know whats good for em. gotta go grizzly adams with it

i had the chinstrap for the longest before i went full beard. it was effective. you got the jaw for it. it only looks dumb on skinny weirdo's with the slackjaw. keep a neat stache and chinstrap and your good.

[Fart]

Same shit with me. Plus dudes who cook and shit...women can't resist. I've had multiple females tell me "men cooking is like porn for women" - exact words from all

hows the catering shit tho?

[Strikta]

Fuck the Cavs uh-oh

@Art, catering shit going alright.. I'm more hands on inside the restaurant tho.. running the kitchen. The owners are starting to give me more responsibility so it's all good.

But word I hear u on that bitches like a dude that can cook.

[God Of War]

joe u look like bubba sparxxx a bit rofl

[Joe Metts]

Action Bronson with the grizz. Bubba without. I can dig it.

And word Strikta ..5 game home winning streak. Wall starting again. Looking alright.

[uh-oh]

lmao strik still mad from the lebron era

he used to eat the wizards in the playoffs

CAVSSS

its all good tho. cavs got like the worst record in the league last i heard

[Joe Metts]

Yea but kyrie is gonna be elite man. He'll leave though lol

[uh-oh]

i hope not

i remember dudes saying waiters would beast. smh. i called his bum when the cavs picked him. im speaking from ignorance tho for all i know he averages 20 a game. i havent watched shit this year. i did catch irving single handedly beat the raptors tonight/last night tho. but thats not saying much lol

[Joe Metts]

Waiters needs burn. He played one year at Syracuse and wasn't a starter.


Needs minutes. That's all.

[veritas]

this thread has led me to invent proposition1....aka cry for help.

prop1.

[Strikta]

Veritas wtf are u talking about?

& I have a feeling the Wizards & the LeBron led Cavaliers rivalry isn't over.. there will be a rivalry renewed in a few years.

Kyrie is a problem tho.

[veritas]

this is what I am talking about Tim:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=loIUe0iCHBE

[Strikta]

That just ruined me. lmfao

[veritas]

That is the mind of Crunchy Dick Mouse.

now grow up.