Broken halo vs master rock[MR WINS]

[Inno]

NWL:Season I: Week VII



Verses ares due: SUNDAY at 11:59 PM EST

Voting ends: TUESDAY at 11:59 PM EST

Line Limit: Minimum:10 lines, Max: 30

Voting on 2 battles is required.


TOPIC:


https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcQDIejJ5bmGQseyyRK1z5J69v1ZXj9 coM5-Lvcy41iLeLtQU8Qp

Master Rock brokenhal0

[brokenhal0]

Back stabbed rats are scared packed the chandeliers
Random stares cool breeze standing fan style a rare
Leg of lamb waves expand take your land
story of abraham same fate that weighed his man
loud smelling like roasted aubergine life is a trampoline
Pulled a knife out my back hand you the wrath of me
Take a stab i cant wait to plan i dont need a chair
I cant wait to stand no matter where i turn
The wounds have to burn i earn like a big fish
Real money gold fractalized in deep six
Speak code speaks glyphs secrets
Eat shit incomplete bitch encrypted
Ecleptic traphouse smelling like demons in it

stabbed in the back
Be aware of the fact
Shadowman wants you to react
put a end to the answers you ask

[Master Rock]

guards down susceptible to pain
sedated by loves vision
borderline insane
strained displaying weakness open wounds
in a sight that is plain
you got my back...yeah right
left existential life
treated as a device plugged in powered by where one shall plunge the knife
pain and agony shattered relationship proscription construct of cavity question creation's catastrophe
deception of what one may deem as reality but yet in truth it all remains a fallacy
who's really my friend awkward smiles and pretend shall I reached out for the hand that lends
change face to face the music I'll return the blade take another stab then
trust is gone but it's all I ever had two faces which one do I choose heads tails either way 50/50 I lose
covered up what I trust two sides leaning towards the wise choose
my back a target for target practice but the fact is you're the reason I cry best friends become strangers combined with anger dispised
what a waste of time I been used abused deserted in the dark then you question my wounds
memories trust vanquish in the end who is the one that will lose
meanwhile, I'll take a seat and sing the blues

[Exis]

guards down susceptible to pain
sedated by loves vision
borderline insane
strained displaying weakness open wounds
in a sight that is plain

^^Chea...

I really like Halo, & in all seriousness never heard of Master...but he took this.What I quoted was nice imo.

V / MR...

[Adonis]

I read each three times, and I gotta be honest, I don't get either verses underlying meaning, I'm sort of lost here in terms of concept. So with that said, Halo wrote in a strange style, very cryptic, which I didn't like much. It makes the read less enjoyebale in my eyes.


v/M. Rock

To me he had the better writen verse in terms of flow and overall content as far as I can tell, but again, a bit hard to decipher either for me this week. sorry.

[Razah]

Hmm. Both pieces are pretty random.

brokenhal0's verse was something I couldn't put together. I actually really dig the flow / rhyme scheme, it read off pretty nicely, it just didn't make sense to me. I couldn't piece any of it together to how it related to the picture besides the references of the actual picture. All in all, I really like the flow behind this. It was pretty smooth, it was just.. hard to understand. If you could streamline a concept to a scheme like that, it should make for a really enjoyable read.

Master Rock's verse was the better of the two to me. Conceptually, it made a little more sense to me than brokenhal0's. What I got from it, essentially, was fake friends pretty much.

"guards down susceptible to pain
sedated by loves vision
borderline insane
strained displaying weakness open wounds
in a sight that is plain"

The opening was pretty cool. I didn't like the, in a sight that is plain. Like, I get it, in plain sight, but- don't force the wording of something for the sake of a rhyme. Besides that, I would work on the structure of your verses to make for a smoother flow. Also, there was a couple of grammar mistakes. The correct usage of a word, along with comma's in the correct place, etc.. will make for a much better read.

Thanks for showing guys, I'm going to have to go with Master Rock on this one.

vMaster Rock