WEEK 4: (2-1) evaD Vs (1-1) Adverse (5-0 EVAD WINS)

[dull boy]

Rules

1 bar minimum 2 bar max per post

Bar(s) must reference your opponent's, either directly or indirectly
(excluding the first bar(s) posted in the battle, obv)

DO NOT post twice in a row

There is NO restriction on how quickly you can respond once your opponent has posted
(failure to respond within 24 hours of your opponent will result in a DQ)

Excessive chatter leading up to your bars could result in a DQ at my discretion. Let your bars do the talking.

If you opened the battle you may not post after 10:59PM EST on Sunday.
This is to discourage last second posting without giving your opponent the opportunity to respond and equal the number of posts in a battle.

Thread will close Sunday at midnight EST

Adverse you're up first. You have 24 hours from the time this thread was posted.

Do me a favor and @ your opponent each time you post. Good luck.

[Adverse]

Fuck them gunbars dawg, I kill u before one clip gets fired
All that 9 iron talk will lose its legs once they find u in a ditch like Tiger
evaD

[evaD]

One lazy tiger bar.. that’s all ur packing this time?
Bro, Resin already made that joke and his actually rhymed.
I’m tiger back in his prime, snap clubs in half on your spine
think ur outta the woods? I grab the putter from my caddy n let fly

[Adverse]

Go ahead n smack my spine with clubs, I still ain’t foldin son
You tryna drive w/ a putter?! I lift the stick n dome ya....that’s a hole in one
Speaking of golf
When I tee off I’m ready to kill shit, best believe we won’t form a truce
When Dave tee off, it’s just his wardrobe preppin for a gay porno shoot


evaD

[evaD]

Ur right.. cuz with the tee off Im stacked but trust
I just can’t seem to find a fairway... to tell you you’re fat as fuck
Fuck this golf shit, Ima hear the colt click when I’ve finished squeezing
That’s one more click than your faggot poet league will get all season
Adverse

[Adverse]

So what I’m a butterball? Your girl think I’m a fuckin star
It ain’t about golf, I’m taking the swings cus ur stroke game wasn’t up to par
Haha...it’s wack that he, think he’s busting gats at his foes
Only time he heard a ‘a Colt talk’ was streaming the Pat Mcafee Show

evaD

[evaD]

Played golf puns are boring, I’m about to start screaming shoot me
Besides Your stroke game is so good.. both sides of your face are equally droopy
And fuck that last reference.. there’s a joke there but you did it wrong
Mcafee shows up on YOUR computer.. every time you start searching kiddie porn
Adverse

[Adverse]

When I start shootin you gon die, let the deuce and the fo’ fly
Dual wielding the steel, could leave you droopin from both sides
Tryna make accusations for a quick laugh but you’re a comical bore
Even if I did watch kiddie porn, I’d never see a dick smaller than yours

evaD

[evaD]

This guys really wilting, Don’t be surprised when I’ve killed him
Not sure what’s worse.. you knowing about MY size or the children’s?
I’m dropping slam dunks in here, your bars just spoilin it, jerk
Only time you even touching the rim is cleaning toilets at work
Adverse

[Adverse]

Legs too weak to be runnin with the best, your punishment is death
The only ‘Wilt-ing ’ I do is coming through to drop 100 on your head
I’m really about the metal, the only thing that you pop off’s jaws
Way I bring two Bulldogs to this bitch u think I’m returnin Gaga’s dogs


evaD

[evaD]

Running with the best? What type of powder you smoking?
If you’re dropping a hundred on a head a gym shower is broken
To hell with your art you were never felt from the start
And If I saw you walk up with two bulldogs I couldn’t tell you apart
Adverse

[Adverse]

Open them lips, yellowed ass teeth n smell like swift decay
You telling me the price of a shower head is rich considering Brits don’t bathe
Speaking of Bulldogs, this unathletic noodle’d never make the team
Kind of ironic cus he about to be catching bullets like AJ Green evaD

[evaD]

Brits don’t bathe? Nah I keep it clean and I get chicks for days
You keeping it clean is your girl fingering your back for nits and flakes
An [insert wide reciever] catching bullets bar just has to be so sad
Last time someone thought that was a fresh concept they wrote it in an actual notepad
Adverse

[Adverse]

It’s over man you should quit, that’s some amateur shit
Most amazing thing about that “keeping it clean” bar was it wasn’t another janitor flip
Talkin football?
You’ll be Madden moments when u find I out I blew out ya girl back then flipped her over
Last time she switched positions for u, it was Madden Moments, pressin X on the controller


evaD

[dull boy]

Consensus

Adverse had at lot of predictable things but I really fucked with his flip of the 'keeping it clean' bar. He's finding his footing but a lot of it was 'see a word dave used -> flip that word' instead of coming at him the way he did at the end.

Dave raped Ad. He is trying just uses some old concepts. Wording is still an issue. Nothing has sting yet.

Dave’s retorts were on another level than Ad’s, but he put up a valiant effort. Individually, their lines were both both equally fine, but the angles Dave hit Ad with seemed to keep Ad on the defensive the entire time, rather than him spinning the rebuttals into hard hitting lines themselves

Adverse had a few poorly worded lines that ran way too long

I think wit-wise, Dave was slightly better, as well. The dick size rebuttal was perfectly executed

Ad was good this battle, but perhaps a little out matched against Dave this week. A lot of judges seem to think Dave is maybe the most dangerous person in the field and he showed why in this battle. Ad was nice, and it's important to give him credit this week, because Dave got a lot of the props, but he really was just on a slightly higher level as far as his consistency with his comedic wording and excellent use of rebuttals.

Verdict

All 5 judges had Dave taking this one, but thought Ad was dope for the most part.

5-0 Dave wins