Saint
09-17-2022, 04:04 AM
[MaCe]
……I'm 'Solemnly Seen'…Where 'Neglect' Is 'Replicated' Through The "Bottom Of My Glass"…As My Smile Dims To What's Been Slain…The Pavement Ricocheting My "Fathers Restraints"…Where A "Belt Buckle" 'Symbolizes' A 'Reflection' To My Own "Growing Pains"……
…… Its So Simple And Plain…'Assurance Shot Down' When My "Confidence Was Feigned"…Try Living A Life Without Knowing Who Gave You Your Fucking Name…Your Mind Molds…But Still Nothings Changed…When 'Physical Awareness Dies Out'…Only "Memories Remain"…….
……The 'Tape Behind Divorce' Was Correlated Through "Rewind"…As In 'Time'…Consciously Id Divide…'Identity Check?' A Subject Under Who?…I Cannot Find…When The Meaning Behind 'Visitation Days' Only "Accounted For The Courts Time"……
……Portrayed As A 'Hollow Groom'…Destined To "Marry Pain" In A Process So Soon…'Stationed To Take Punishment'…So 'Southpaws Stayed Tuned' To My Chest Where The Bass 'Left' A 'Bruise'…How Does It Feel Being Worth A 'Check'…Where The 'Payment' Goes To Bottles Of Listerine Chugged From Your Mom Secretly In The Bathroom?……
……So Id Hide…Wondering If I Was The Only One Who Felt This…'Elementary To Issues Resolved'…So The "Problems Grew" Into "Resolute" Pricks Kissing My Fucking Fist…A Younger Sister Wondering What Gives?…When 'Arguments Buried Laughter' With An "Influence Of Hidden Confidence"……
……All I Wanted Was To Smile…Maybe A Pad On The Back For Certain Accomplishments…Maybe An Honored Gift? But No…A Coal Heart Wrapped In A Present Unleashed As A Fist…Thanks Dad…I Can Stare For Hours…Cuz He'd Hit Me Harder If Before He Swung I Flinched……
……A "Family Torn From The Bone" As 'Muscles To Shin Splints'…Resounded Only By Chance Or Realization Of Cause…Yet 'My Fathers Stroke' Was "His Only Hint"…"Evidently"…I Could Have Had An Older Brother…Yet When My 'Mother Yelled Stop'…He "Obviously Didn't Give A Shit"……
……Holiday Relatives…Only Relevant To My Existence When Presents Aren't Cut…Now Drifting Away In Graves…Yet I Could Give A Fuck…Skin Ripped Through Childhood Beatings…A Perplexed Appearance…Expressions 'Engaged To Transgression'…Now A "Mrs. Conduct"……
……I Know You Like A Book…But The Pages Are Stripped…I Still Pick At The Scabs Of A Scarred Life Where Sub-Consciously My Smile Ripped…Still Remember What Running Through The Sprinklers In Boulder Creek Brings…
……A Reality Foreshadowed Through The Shattered Impression Of A Handless Man Pushing Me On My Broken Swings…..
[clark griswald]
.......Fading impressions ..and fake smiles and a nervous laugh to a glance
a shattered mirror, fractured skyline, everlast with the rants............
..I can't really say i'd believe, achieved or i'd need a perfection to 'getting older', I hold my good memories tight around a cool breeze draft circling to a 'ending smoulder' ..
..It's that balence of normal, that crutch, that you lean on completley over the sharp 'edge of the cliff'; with your 'head in a drift' you rely solely on that to ensure your 'bed as a kid'
..........and with sleep brings a new day, the fight washes away only to resurface 'down the road', theres a 'sound..it goes' .. bad childhoods cast the shadow for a lifetime ..
and a lifetime..................is you...............'found your rose'...
...the worst feeling in the world, is not 'having that love', and you've heard about it before through 'cracks in the rug', shining through till your stomach hurts knowing its not you and you 'have to give up'
...and its all better now, for a brief moment, you see since i was old enough i couldn't 'wait to move out', my mothers an angel, but not superhuman and still shed 'stay through the shouts',
and the 'slammed doors',
till 'hands tore', her grip on my good childhood, pulled untill i was 'forced to go along'...
my father wasnt the same, well he never was, i guess i blocked it out, 'of course it was wrong'...
but... 'it's all in a song'....................bad childhoods cast the shadow for a lifetime ..
and everyones got a shadow..........but who 'weathered the storm'?
……I'm 'Solemnly Seen'…Where 'Neglect' Is 'Replicated' Through The "Bottom Of My Glass"…As My Smile Dims To What's Been Slain…The Pavement Ricocheting My "Fathers Restraints"…Where A "Belt Buckle" 'Symbolizes' A 'Reflection' To My Own "Growing Pains"……
…… Its So Simple And Plain…'Assurance Shot Down' When My "Confidence Was Feigned"…Try Living A Life Without Knowing Who Gave You Your Fucking Name…Your Mind Molds…But Still Nothings Changed…When 'Physical Awareness Dies Out'…Only "Memories Remain"…….
……The 'Tape Behind Divorce' Was Correlated Through "Rewind"…As In 'Time'…Consciously Id Divide…'Identity Check?' A Subject Under Who?…I Cannot Find…When The Meaning Behind 'Visitation Days' Only "Accounted For The Courts Time"……
……Portrayed As A 'Hollow Groom'…Destined To "Marry Pain" In A Process So Soon…'Stationed To Take Punishment'…So 'Southpaws Stayed Tuned' To My Chest Where The Bass 'Left' A 'Bruise'…How Does It Feel Being Worth A 'Check'…Where The 'Payment' Goes To Bottles Of Listerine Chugged From Your Mom Secretly In The Bathroom?……
……So Id Hide…Wondering If I Was The Only One Who Felt This…'Elementary To Issues Resolved'…So The "Problems Grew" Into "Resolute" Pricks Kissing My Fucking Fist…A Younger Sister Wondering What Gives?…When 'Arguments Buried Laughter' With An "Influence Of Hidden Confidence"……
……All I Wanted Was To Smile…Maybe A Pad On The Back For Certain Accomplishments…Maybe An Honored Gift? But No…A Coal Heart Wrapped In A Present Unleashed As A Fist…Thanks Dad…I Can Stare For Hours…Cuz He'd Hit Me Harder If Before He Swung I Flinched……
……A "Family Torn From The Bone" As 'Muscles To Shin Splints'…Resounded Only By Chance Or Realization Of Cause…Yet 'My Fathers Stroke' Was "His Only Hint"…"Evidently"…I Could Have Had An Older Brother…Yet When My 'Mother Yelled Stop'…He "Obviously Didn't Give A Shit"……
……Holiday Relatives…Only Relevant To My Existence When Presents Aren't Cut…Now Drifting Away In Graves…Yet I Could Give A Fuck…Skin Ripped Through Childhood Beatings…A Perplexed Appearance…Expressions 'Engaged To Transgression'…Now A "Mrs. Conduct"……
……I Know You Like A Book…But The Pages Are Stripped…I Still Pick At The Scabs Of A Scarred Life Where Sub-Consciously My Smile Ripped…Still Remember What Running Through The Sprinklers In Boulder Creek Brings…
……A Reality Foreshadowed Through The Shattered Impression Of A Handless Man Pushing Me On My Broken Swings…..
[clark griswald]
.......Fading impressions ..and fake smiles and a nervous laugh to a glance
a shattered mirror, fractured skyline, everlast with the rants............
..I can't really say i'd believe, achieved or i'd need a perfection to 'getting older', I hold my good memories tight around a cool breeze draft circling to a 'ending smoulder' ..
..It's that balence of normal, that crutch, that you lean on completley over the sharp 'edge of the cliff'; with your 'head in a drift' you rely solely on that to ensure your 'bed as a kid'
..........and with sleep brings a new day, the fight washes away only to resurface 'down the road', theres a 'sound..it goes' .. bad childhoods cast the shadow for a lifetime ..
and a lifetime..................is you...............'found your rose'...
...the worst feeling in the world, is not 'having that love', and you've heard about it before through 'cracks in the rug', shining through till your stomach hurts knowing its not you and you 'have to give up'
...and its all better now, for a brief moment, you see since i was old enough i couldn't 'wait to move out', my mothers an angel, but not superhuman and still shed 'stay through the shouts',
and the 'slammed doors',
till 'hands tore', her grip on my good childhood, pulled untill i was 'forced to go along'...
my father wasnt the same, well he never was, i guess i blocked it out, 'of course it was wrong'...
but... 'it's all in a song'....................bad childhoods cast the shadow for a lifetime ..
and everyones got a shadow..........but who 'weathered the storm'?