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View Full Version : FB2: RD1 Introductory Magazine (10/3/13) [NSFW]


Strikta
10-04-2013, 03:51 AM
The Long Anticipated...
NChttp://oi42.tinypic.com/20788kn.jpg
II's

..Round One Magazine..
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Introduction

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Well, thanks to everyone for being patient for this.. I have been crazy busy & dealing w/ life away from a computer. First off, a big shot out to everyone who signed up for this.. looking at the roster, it's sure to be one of the best tournaments we've had in a while, well... since last years really. We've got some big names who signed up, including the former champ by NS. We also have the 2x back to back SC champ here.. who is a fave to win it all. We got some small time names too.. but they deserve a shot to get themselves heard. This whole thing promises to be dope.. I encourage everyone to bring their A game & VOTE VOTE VOTE. This one isn't for the weak.. if u don't have bars u ain't gonna make it.

Sn00p has collaborated w/ me on this, as he did last year. It's probably gonna be tradition from this point. His efforts in the tourney are vital, & key, & I thank him for his help as always. He's here for any concerns u may have, as well as myself. Don't hesitate to take things up w/ him if u have questions.. & tho he's a participant in battling in this.. there shall be absolutely NO bias or favoritism shown in this forum shown on his behalf, or towards him.

We promise to bring u the best show possible. Now on w/ it....



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Rules & Regulations Updated **MUST READ PLZ**

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I feel like I have to explain this stuff again, just so everything is clear. There are numerous things that will get u DQ'd.. & the new one is SWAYING, gents... yes, I know in years passed this was just something that was frowned upon w/ maybe a slap on the wrist.. but no real punishment. Tbh this was always something I never understood, it should have always been an enforced rule, in violation causing disqualification. There is 0 tolerance for this in Fall Brawl II.. reason being is that not only is it faggot shit, but it drastically changes the outcomes of battles favoring the swayer.. while the swayee just sits there & gets fucked by pity & hate votes. No more. Next is Biting of course, Recycling, & voting for urself under an alias. If caught breaking any of those rules u'll be out of the tourney.

Also, there is a 6 vote mandatory rule. U have to paste links into the voting link thread so I can see them. Plz be a nice guy & don't make me have to look for ur votes all thru these battles, just save a nigga the aggravation if u could & post em' in the designated thread for me plz, & thanks. For every vote that u have missing, u will be docked 2 in ur next battle.. or if ur a clear cut faggot about voting I may find another punishment more fitting. Either way... it's important to vote, & short bullshit ones w/ no decent explanation won't count as legit either.

Extensions on battles are allowed per the norm. U can be granted up to 48 hours depending on what ur opponent allows. In rare cases, there may be a staff induced extension allowing all or some battles to have the deadline pushed back. If u DO request an ext w/ ur opponent.. make sure ur both in agreement on the new deadline u've set for urselves.

Follow these fairly basic guidelines & u should be good to go fellas.


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Conferences & Divisions

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EAST:

Green Division

Hush
Young Philly
Bags
Patrick
Frank Metts
Knucklehead
Arch.
Gamble


Orange Division

Beyond
God of War
Blue Bayou
Allen Knight
Destroyer
Sintro
Defiant.
Malachi


WEST:

Black Division

Alvin Karpis
Cashius
Joe Metts
ill nik-A
PancakeBrah
Rawn MD
Phuck Yew
Cunt


Gold Division

Orc
Neighbor
Sn00p
Karaoke
Deon
Boredom
Meth
Unfuckwitable


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Power Rankings [1-10]
By Strikta

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1. Alvin Karpis

Imo Karp is the most consistent battler right now & the favorite to win it all. He's a 2 time back to back Classic champion w/ other numerous accomplishments. Anyone getting matched up against him needs to bring their all to win. Plain & Simple. The spot he has in these rankings is a no brainer, & he earned it.


2. Cashius

I give Cash the #2 spot because he's found a certain streak of consistency & I don't see him slowing down anytime soon. When this dude puts in the effort he's near unbeatable.. & one of the most dangerous to go up against. I wouldn't underestimate this dude one bit if u happen to run across him in the battlefield. Cash is as good as they come these days & that's all there is to it.


3. Beyond

Bey gets the 3 spot based off his tournament run last year. For some reason Bey ups his efforts in these things & is a threat to any & everyone. NC's own one eyed bandit is sure to wreak havoc w/ complex ideas & technical wording. Hopefully he can stay motivated & make another run in this one.


4. Hush

Hush lands at #4 because I question how motivated he'll be to write for this. Hush has recently stated he only does this for the nostalgia factor.. which I completely agree w/ & respect. Fact is tho, if he turns it up & actually wants to try.. he can beat anyone imo. BUT that's only if he does. I rank him in the top 5 simply based on his talent level & where he could possibly go in this.


5. Bags

I think Bags will advance far in this if he tries. As of late I'm sure he's underrated, & will also be underestimated. Bags hasn't been the most motivated battler on the site as of late.. but u can't forget how talented he is if he shows up. I think if Bags wins this whole thing there shouldn't be a question as to why he was inducted into the HOF.. this will infact cement it.


6. Neighbor

Another guy that has the talent, but has a question mark hanging over him in regards to motivation & want. Neighbor has to actually WANT to win this.. as I know he's talked about doing this at a smaller level just to exercise them brainwaves. I think Neighbor's extremely talented & can go far, if not win it.. if he tries. We'll see what he does.


7. Young Philly

Young Pissy da god.. haha.. he still gets a spot in this top 10 & I'll tell u why.... Philly went on such a tear last year & into this year, beating top level cats.. that I HAVE to put him in. No question if he brings what I know he can bring he'll wreck kids. I haven't seen him posting that much lately so I'm wondering what kind of effort he'll bring, or if he'll even show up at all. If he does tho, watch out.


8. God of War

GoW makes the top 10 still in light of his GTAV induced absence. He made it to the finals last year & could very well do it again if he resurfaces. I would have ranked him higher if I was sure he'd show... but chances are he will not. GoW has been gone since the day before the release of a popular video game. I still have to give him the benefit of the doubt tho.


9. Joe Metts

Joe gets a spot in these rankings because I know what he can do if he actually tries.. just as it goes for most of the cats I've posted in these rankings.. it's all a question of motivation. Joe can bring humor to high levels in his verses & clown u to death. He brings a fresh approach but can take it old school if need be & punish u w/ punches. Joe can do major things here if he wants to.


10. ill nik-A

Nik is a monster, point blank period. Sometimes u can get the mediocre Nik tho.. & that's what I'm afraid of. BUT outta nowhere Nik can bring some of the best battle verses u could ever read.. it just depends on which cubano u get to show up. Hopefully he focuses in on this tournament & tears shit up like I know he can. We'll see.

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11-20 (in this order): Sn00p, Blue Bayou, Karaoke, Allen Knight, Destroyer, Swerve, Deon, Frank Metts, Knucklehead, PancakeBrah.

I wanted to rank Sintro somewhere.. but I don't know what shape he'll be in when or if he shows up here.


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Taking a Look Back

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Throwback Battles:


Alvin Karpis vs. Deon [NBL Season 1 Playoffs]

Alvin Karpis

Deon loves to deny the rumors, this faggot is stupid
I heard you had a thing for Hensley…..its plastic with batteries included
People say he traded lines with you n I don’t really care if it’s true
Cuz what’s funny is he won a fight night & you probably wanna share that shit too
I heard you also like to ghostwrite but I’m starting to doubt it
Cuz when I said compose for me, you brought a camera & 20 outfits
We all die but guaranteed your death will be from obesity, fag
It’s easy for you to kick the bucket….when your bedroom floor is full of KFC bags
You can't pull bitches, n when you got played, I got laid
Cuz D-wade so much it could of inspired the James n Bosh trade
Ya heart pumps gravy, you should probably go on a diet when
You’re so fuckin fat you put bacon & mayonnaise on ya vitamins
It’s pretty sad in your last battles you thought you could magically win
Props on beating hush when he didn’t try & losing to rupture when YOU actually did
I had to laugh it up cuz he made you look like the saddest chump
You always play childish games so now I’m wondering Candyland a punch

Deon

Cute.

Lets go,
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This flop's got jokes but there's no way he'll top my quotes
Ur style dont just CLASH with Dohpe it looks like Oneduh being dropped by both
Even with losses I made noise while you droppin that quiet shit
I make scoring look easy, U make it look like a glass of wine with a roofie inside of it
Lama just gassed you. I'm wayyy better than this Karpis bitch plz
I was writing lines for Mr. T...while U BARELY made it this far in the league
So comparisons are stupid it's no way U should think that ya nice
U the reason NBL needs a JR. & NOT that shitty mixtape Razah linked on the site
U aint torchin, hoe's all say that this lame bores them
Al couldnt 'have a nice day' with bitches if Mic Foley spit game for him
So its pretty clear that this lame fucker isnt a straight fucker
When a stick shift in a Kar...I bet its date night for him & his gay lover
I already peeped him copy shit, its right there when you droppin spits
U can act like U dont know my style but biting & making it WORSE is so obvious
AK will go in the trunk for even trying to think he's savage
and thats not a Gun line, U not as good as him & even HE couldnt beat me faggot

Winner: Alvin Karpis

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Lefty vs. Beyond [Legacy, from 2010]

Beyond


Fact: you suck. I’m making you pay ‘cause you can’t back it up.
And I’d make sure the check is good, but ^that shit was wack as fuck.
Crybaby bitch, don’t try saying shit or defend your groupies.
Most shit sways in the wind, you sway when you get wind of losing.
Senseless newbie. Alvin ain’t even shit, you’ll never be a boss again.
I mean c’mon.. at least when I beat ‘em, not EVERYONE said I lost to him.
Murder you like Costigan, I’m off the hinge and tough as The Miz.
And just an fyi, Beyonce’ lines are played in whips enough as it is.
I’m all for honoring those that passed, ‘specially who caught the lead.
And Left 4 dead 2, is the only way his game’ll get ‘em a shot at head.
Those predictions are gay as fuck, you’re no Rick James with bitches.
Faggot, the only reason you got Morris ‘cause your dick game is vicious.
My key’s divine. Yours last round was trash, no need to lie.
I swear.. if Left wing’s it, Obama’s approval ratings are at a steep decline.
Read the lines. And realize, chum. That your girl is a real wide cunt.
Your bitch is a whale of a woman who even I wouldn’t fuck Tillikum.
Your punches are hoeish, plus you’re wack and "sort’ve" rap.
Each one of yours just Peppers, mine fucking sack the Quarterback.
Guess swag and flow is "in" now. Damn, text got simple quick.
You won the title, but who the fuck wouldn’t against a Defcon nipple slip.
Get wrecked, ya’ little bitch. It’s time I expose the fronting.
If you’re in DOHpe, the name fits since they must be smoking something.
This dude is a bitch, you got beat last round and I’ma do it again.
With my drive, Leftover from the get-go like fastfood in the fridge.
I’m A-list in this tourney — your seed is laughable, newb.
You got a stronger tie to C than your battle against Gaffle could prove.
I’m baffled by you. Thinking you could beat a legend, kid.
When all that goes to show is that you’d have a loss if Resin did.
Bet I’ll win. Cried ‘cause your Legacy punchline was so newbie-esque.
Mad only people ride-in that Subaru flip are stunt drivers on movie sets.

Lefty


as soon as day's breaking, he’s pacing and stays hatin
fuck vacation this face scraping’ll make Chile look like safe haven
i’m cake chasin and clip thugs. fists that’ll split mugs
any punches Be list look more like the cast of Celebrity Fit Club
you started at Nobody’s Smiling?! wow, dude musta been smitten
sorry it died
but you’ve tried keeping it living with every punch that you’ve written
played lines is a given. read your no show verse, quit rap. a quick fact…
no matter how you dressed up that cum line, it STILL looked straight off the thrift rack
fucking kid’s whack. I haven’t lost and don’t have that event planned
it aint in the bag. those are your net fans dressing like Nets fans
don’t test Left’s hands, I REALLY had a pops in the joint
reading Beyond verses shows you’re pussy if it got to that point
and first round opponents? you still got failing scores
a fucking whole team of FlowD0cs had no shot fixing whats ailing yours
i could give a fuck where you live, i’m known for hoarding guns
i’m in the east, Bey...but your catalogue isn’t something we’d order from
for you it’s more than fun. its young boys you’d die to caress in bunks
i should tank. then it’d be Alien vs. a Predator dateline’s been tryna catch for months
you’ll be stretched in trunks. fucking LOLLLL @ your NBL record, whore
Guns clipped you AND you got hit with the Tsunami hawaii was checking for
dohpe is who im reppin for. check brackets, you werent predicted to merk
I’m rippin this jerk. It’s March, Madness should’ve written his verse
lifting his skirt. fuck your disease, I’ll blind side you with metaphors
baretta’s, 4’s….when I aim the glaucoma’s really what youre headed for
i settle scores, and there’s no way you’ll whoop marcus ass
you literally cant see me, I’d fight you just for the handicapped parking pass
your bars is trash. got no crew, start knockin on veteran’s doors
you need to Snatch lines, both he and his roommate’s are better than yours
getting severed for sure, somebody put a frozen steak on his eye
i’m afraid for this guy. even the Beyond/Lefty matchup’s based on a lie

Winner: Lefty

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Bags vs. Rawnold Macdonyall [Key Grand Prix, from 2011]

Bags

Maybe I'm goin overboard w this but has ne body else noticed it...
Theres talent shortages so each round after sound the easier my opponents get
But u scammed ur way here u gotta be cheatin sumthin does not seem ok
This pussies a cookie cuz We all saw u take the Ginger bread when u robbed pjk
And ill be damned if I'm frontin but beyond was a standard above him
I mean that nigga got one eye,no depth perception and still landed more punches
How many times I gotta rip this geek thisll be 3 since I put up my christmas tree
3rd times the charm ...so run that too ,and don't be runnin ur fuckin lips to me
Bags is a battle arena goon ... They say im weak & feast on noobs
Need more proof? Nobody mentions u,unless its a punch on me.. for beating you

Rawnold Macdonyall


This round Rawn’s checkin bags more than angry flight attendants
What do I find offensive? That I need to construct a verse that has bite protection
I know your make up, only thing you benchmark are bleachers and gay clubs
You’ll never stand a chance, couldn’t advance with a checkin store, a w2 n pay stubs
Get your weight up, I’ll put my little sister in the passenger seat when bags deploy
She’ll laugh with joy, you lack the reach for contact muchless destroy; choirboy
Couldn’t hold a tune on tracks, Mack’ll dog you out quicker then Greyhounds
bags best is only good for one thing - take out, and even that gets laid out
This drop Mack stops the buyers burden; I’ll outclass bags n give him a higher learning
And While your working - don’t show, homo - I woulda rather battled Tyler Durden

Winner: Bags

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Sound vs. Suth [Bad Blood, from 2009]

Sound

last match Ya ducked on me, had nothin written
Ya forfeited instead of no showin!? what's the fuckin difference!?
Ya sensitive. can't take a joke, thats fine i guess
..and truthfully neither can CLASH and that explains why i'm the S
actually wanna battle, nah.. stop he ain't serious
he ain't want no parts of bad blood since he ate his moms on her period
Ya got kicked from Clash, look, nigga ya failed.
now ya left cheerin from the sideline but ya still can't give me an L
Ya in the driverseat. my advise is the safest bet
speed & run a red light with no seatbelt off a bridge..& take a brake from txt
our first battle had raw lines and a helluva flow
sick wording, dope punches & wit..and oh yeah, you never did show
pussy's get fucked with ease n' severed on sight
after this match ya scratched off the list n' can find ya name next to ya wifes
Ya attitude got me baffled so i have to ask guy.
why all of a sudden you became humble.. i mean you ain't even that nice
we been around a while but nobody'll give em' shine
i'll admit Sutherland's seasoned..but its too bad this was my dinner time

Sutherland


Enough of the shit talkin, you suck. Case close & thas the endin
Hush the crappy verse of yours & you'll prolly have a better chance at winnin
^ & if he gave you ammo then hopefully alien will bring useful help
He came w. peace.. now load it up, place to ya head & shoot yourself
On BB you were overratted.Tag tourny was your bigggest step
Now ya career resembles the Sonics- aint done shit since kemp done left
Fuck your fan base here. no matter where we are bitch I own ya
I’ll blacken that “S” in clash again.. & this time he'll suffer in a coma
You & skills don't go together.Couldn't happen if we just pretend
That relationship'll never occur,you wouldn't even get a "Lets just be friends"
Peeped your pic & that wrinkle in your forehead can distract, damn
Hope your face don't light up off that remark cuz then you'd signal The Batman
Bottom line is your ugly.. thas it, i'm not tryin to hurt this fag worst
Besides.. ya forehead's makin waves so imma hope on w.a board & swag surf
My verse a beast sound, but w. yours you should end & stop them
Your versa ‘95 piece of shit.. suffering from transmission & engine problems
Just tryin to be like you.Fuck defcon_5, he's so obnoxious
^& i already got it.. look at how great i made that line trail off topic

Winner: Sound

Posted in loving memory of our dear friend, Sound. (1986-2012, RIP)

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God of War & Mafioso vs. h.t & Allen Knight [Tag Team Tournament, from 2010]

God 0f War+Mafioso


h.t. tryin to up his text game, tho he should be elite since
he spends all day in knight......then they just cuddle in the evenin
and neither is dope, you was both tooken lightly
cuz the only al thats worth reading....has a fuckin bye week
youve never been shit, both of you is slim picks
the only thing thats a riot..........is thinking u can win this
ur whole corps lame, the reason for all the board hate
is allen only thinks hes a fuckin G cuz he cums before H
im runnin shit, there wont be no duckin bitch
H.T. won the nbl last season...n still no one knows u fuckin exist
i bury liars, and you hoes is barely writers
you both act like 18 year old bitches on the net......Mary Shieler
i thought u was both nice, now all my beliefs gon
cuz we only think u should rap battle...since thats the site u should be on
it looks like ur bringin ur worst, so both you should be in the dirt
you only did good with the 1-2- punch cuz thats all we'll see in ur verse
and i battle vets every week, so what makes this clown important
h.t'll spend his whole career in allens shadow.......................al borlen
your the gayest faggots, always lame in this rap shit
the only time you ever ran the street...is when u was told to play in traffic

H.T.+Allen Knight

you two homo's don't stand a chance, I thought you knew better
me and allen are both Killers...You fags just went to see that movie together
mafiaso listen here fag, Your head is the weirdest shape
ya got a poem named an ugly reflection...but when u look in the mirror it breaks
i could take out your whole crew, all you guys drop is shitty bars
I've got links to the Mob...that will show everyone how wack you really are
God of war is lame to me, anyone who plays that game is weak
his alias in the tourney was science fiction...That proves it was made for geeks
both of you faggot's need to get a life or just die off
U called yourselves street politicians...I call ya two bums sittin on the sidewalk
Maf don't front like you ain't someone to sleep on
your just blowing smoke...like in your pic battle with deon
God you are a very average writer, just stop bragging kid
i read your OM Crazy...and that's what everyone is for nominating it
everyone likes to fuck with maf cause the kid is whack
not only are his raps superbad...on rb they gave him mclovin in a celeb pic match
God of war just admit your a con, don't even play kid
U get all your ideas from netcees...concept's from hens and a tourney from david
we all know your a cheating fake that's not fucking worthy
only good story i've read about GOW...was from crud in the topical tourney

Winner: H.T. & Allen Knight


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RD1's Random Battler Profiles

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Knucklehead

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcThqqfe3xjJqdwsv0RcZfZgzvMDsdDSf B0kEnaKwSGBD65mjJyl

Knucklehead is a former NBL champ, Pic & Tag champ in the BA, & won a couple Fight Night events on NC 1.0. Imo Knuck is a contender who can do damage if he puts his mind to it. This soulless battler isn't a favorite to get past the 2nd round more than likely, but he can shock some ppl. MAYBE. It all depends on which Knuck shows up here in FB2. Don't be a faggot ur whole life. ;)

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Beyond

http://i42.tinypic.com/2h6u9i1.jpg

Beyond is known for being one of the most technical text battlers to ever do this hobby of ours. His only real knock is consistency. He's beaten some of the best to ever do it, but had some very bad losses to lower caliber ppl. It's funny really.. u almost have to attribute it to carelessness.. I can't see any other reason why that would happen. Bey's champed & accomplished more shit than I'd like to list right now... he's a seasoned vet & beat the highest form of competition at any given time.. only prob is.. he can also lose to the lowest. Dude made it to the finals & won it by NS last year to GoW. I'm interested to see if he wants to take himself to the finals here & win legitimately to show the site it was never a fluke.

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Swerve aka Patrick

http://i46.tinypic.com/xe3fo1.jpg

The Dove moisturizer man himself, Swervester. This is a cat who I view as highly underrated. A good portion of the battlers here just don't know Swerve's potential & current skill level, & that can work in his favor here if he feels like putting down the Jergens & bringing his best writing. Ha.. but nah, seriously.. when Swerve gives a shit he can crush his opponents w/ wit & pretty decent punches. I'll be keeping a lookout for da kid & see how far he takes himself in this. Goodluck u fearless Canadian. SACLA BLEU bitch nigga.

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Frank Metts

http://netcees.co/image.php?u=6&dateline=1376856740&type=profile

Frank's actually the dude battling the dude I posted above him in this section.. should be a hell of a showing if both drop at their full potential. I haven't seen a whole lot of Frank in general.. very little recently besides the cypher stuff he does.. which I think is pretty good. Apparently Frank has a good reputation writing battle verses & can do damage.. much like his brother. It'll be interesting to see how Frank fares against Swerve, considering the rust factor. Wondering if Frank shoulda been getting some practice battles in the BA &/or NBL before signing up to a major tourney. But who knows... some ppl bring it dope regardless of how long they've been out of it. I'll be looking fwd to his battle w/ Swerve.

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Gamble

http://a2.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/78/1650528480033085ce88c7dcc823454e/l.jpg

There isn't a doubt in my mind that, barring miracle, Gamble makes it past Bags in this first round. I'm sorry.. it just ain't gonna happen for him. This tiny little shit I'm writing right now may in fact be the only clout & exposure he ever gets in a mag, or on this site in general. Only thing that could make Gamble relevant in the battle scene is by pulling off a huge upset win over Bags right fucking now. I wouldn't bet on that happening tho.


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Dat Good Q&A w/ PancakeBrah!
By Strikta

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Here I am w/ PancakeBrah.. an intriguing & highly respected(& well, not so respected) member of the Netcees' community. Cake has become a dominant force in the topical/storytelling/poem leagues.. & is doing a great job as admin for the site as well. Props go out to the young brother.

Strik: Tell me, what are u plans & goals regarding the Fall Brawl.. & how to u plan to redeem urself from ur performance in this tournament last year?? Now I've kept in mind u were just starting out w/ battling this time last year & u were pretty much ONLY known as a troll.

Cake: I plan to win. That's it. Like, the entire tournament. I lost Destroyer last Fall Brawl, but Destroyer sucks. I'm an underdog, I know that. People lack respect for my battling talent due to my boarding nature. But I will destroy my opponents. srs. Fuck everything. Fuck nessy's preconception of who's dope. I'm dope. I will ruin you. Fuck Aero.

Strik: Who are u looking fwd to battling the most in this?

Cake: Bags, Aero, GOW, and Karpis. I will shift the paradigm; they suck. Their grasp of Englsih weak. I'll teach and preach.

Strik: Do u consider urself the best admin of NC?

Cake: It's not a question. Namix is a young man who has confused the fact he can type with the art of being intelligent. Meth is in High School. Knucklehead is Jewish. I'm a fucking monster.

Strik: If given a rematch w/ nik-A.. do u think ud have what it takes to beat the wily veteran again?

Cake: nik gets dickrode to death. he's not good, he just says he is well enough that people believe him, he's an old man who convinces people to think he's relevant.

Strik: Do u think the topical/storytelling side of the site possibly draws as much interest as the battling side?

Cake: obviously not. but i'd rather read the best verse of my topical top 5 than the best verse from my battling top 5. its more nuanced. battlers are faggots."oh shit, personal blah blah blah". fuck off.

Strik: Do u plan on taking ur writing skills & focusing them more into the battling side? From what I can tell u could be a pretty dominant force if u wanted.

Cake: when i focus no one can beat me. im the most intelligent person on this site. i hope everyone votes against me.

Strik: Who are ur favorite battlers on the site? How do u feel about going up against one of them if ur pitted against one in FB?

Cake: my top three battlers are aero, bags, and gow. I could take all of them, though

Strik: What do u think about the state of NC? What can be done to improve things overall? I see u've been doing about everything u possibly can to get ppl to vote lol

Cake: idk. im an admin. shits going well, moreso now that im in a position of power. srs

Strik: Who do u dislike the most on this site, honestly?

Cake: Rawn. Its not close.

Strik: Well Cakester, the floor is urs... speak ur mind on just about any & everything dog...

Cake: Fuck Rawn, respect to Bags and Veritas.

(close)


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"He's Just Misunderstood" ..Rawn MD looks to make his mark in FB2
Article by Strikta

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https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/124_559663522702_6829_n.jpg

When Rawnold Macdonyall isn't swimming w/ sharks, he's swimming in women & money so much that it damn near drowns him. All the late nights.. double shifts at Outbacks & Applebees.. sleep deprivation, PO seeing, gorilla warfare training, street racing, helicopter flying, & lawnwork.. has ALL made this young lad a stronger human being... & secretly, a more crafty & polished writer.

When Rawn isn't strung out or incarcerated, or doing volunteer labor work in the jungles of Colombia.. u can find him in his South Florida apartment w/ his macbook open.. scouring various ridiculous websites for any & all info on absolutely anything this great world has to offer, whether true or false. But no matter.. cuz whatever his brain absorbs & he in turn spits out, is nothing but the motherfucking truth & u have no choice whatsoever but to believe it. Ha.. nah but srs.. truth is really is that Rawn is ready for this tournament & he's gonna give Cashius EVERYTHING he's got... well, he'll have to if he even wants the smallest chance to win. It's been a long time coming for ol' Rawny... who expresses to me that he wants to be now known as more of a battler as well as a storyteller & poet. Personally, I'm a fan of his rhyming mechanics... if he can incorporate some clever dissing & decent punches he just might be someone to look out for.

All I know is this... this first round is Rawn's chance to prove himself as a better, more versatile & all around writer. He needs to try & let some talent shine in so ppl won't have to hate his lying/overexaggerated ass so damn much.

Prove u belong, Rawn MD.. I didn't bring u in here for nothing dog.

OH, btw.. this ain't shark week here nigga.. don't try biting ur way thru these rounds. I'm not saying u would.. but I WILL catch u if u try.


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Remember THIS faggot!? LMAO

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxeRaDe5WBc

This was the one time famous laughing stock of NC, about a year ago I feel like. I happened to stumble back across this just fucking around looking for funny vids.. happened to remember his first name Klaus & typed that along w/ the word 'netcees' in YouTube.. & BOOM!! Funny faggot shit for us all to laugh at. Enjoy.. cuz I bout died when I first saw this!


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Patrick's WTF list is huge, no rawnmo
By Swerve

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WTF’s of the Week
It’s your boy Pat aka Swerve aka Big dick Malloy here with another rendition of the WTF’s of the week. In this section, I’m gonna speak some truths, I’m gonna call Allen Knight a faggot and I’m going to call Bags fat regardless of his new body mass index. So without further ado…
WTF @ Team Rican coming out in full force to support young Reek’s attempt at ghost writing.
WTF @ Gamble being the polarizing text figure that believes he can fill the hole left by Rican the Gawd.
WTF @ every insult coming out of Ricans mouth being something about him getting his dick sucked by a male.
WTF @ this tourney not popping off sooner
WTF @ Strik almost dieing twice
WTF @ it being due to a lung infection and not for his fondness of using the word “nigga” in real life
WTF @ Faggot Allen
WTF @ me having photo evidence of him sucking off a dude named pedro behind Burger King
WTF @ him doing it just for small fries
WTF @ future NCAA EA games being cancelled
WTF @ me not really giving a shit because it was a franchise destined to fail anyway
WTF @ Diode being so full of unroflz posts
WTF @ him having more useful information than anything actually funny. Don’t take that as a compliment
WTF @ Bags trying to pick up using his daughter
WTF @ it not working because no one would ever consider procreate with that slob
WTF @ him even having procreated once before, you know that it involved substances slipped into drinks and I’m not talking curly straws
WTF @ Meth’s power trip
WTF @ me not noticing as it hasn’t affected me and therefore I do not care
WTF @ him being a fat ginger and no amount of admin powers can edit that
WTF @ me saying I’ll do a quick interview and then having to write a section
WTF @ Tostitos
WTF @ them shits be banging with pretty much every kind of salsa
WTF @ Chrit hosting this site
WTF @ no action being taken to fix that situation. We do all recall that Chrit is a shit stain on society, correct?
WTF @ Allen Faggot
WTF @ Fat Bags
WTF @ Eddie losing $5 because his Steelers suck
WTF @ me only betting $5
WTF @ every faggot on the site thinking they can be an arm chair psychologist when they have more problems than the people they are addressing
WTF @ Tic Tac writing in a 2009 style and thinking he’s good
WTF @ “using quotations for your bars”
WTF @ you not also coloring them and throwing in 30 multis too you faggot, if you’re going to commit to it then do it all
WTF @ how much humor I expect out of Bags vs. Gamble
WTF @ me still thinking I’d go in on him harder than Bags
WTF @ it being because Bags is just soft and plushy in general
WTF @ Team Retaliate not picking up any steam. Am I going to have to be co-president again?
WTF @ me battling Frankie
WTF @ that being my boo
WTF @ the tag tourney
WTF @ how nice some of the lines in it are
WTF @ me still being salty about not being in it even though every bar I wrote was quoted in both battles
WTF @ salty swerve
WTF @ Rawn discovering life on other planets
WTF @ his first point of inquiry being if they have leafblowers or any such apparatus he could stick his dick in
WTF @ my annoying ass phone plan
WTF @ Des not hooking me up with some sort of deal yet
WTF @ him being having the career of a 20 year old pimply faced fuck at 40
WTF @ Deon looking like a shorter ruben studdard
WTF @ his text battling name reflecting the man he supports with any paper he makes
WTF @ the Hush/Massai exchange
WTF @ Massai hating on the cartoon shirts
WTF @ that being like half my closet cause I’m immature as fuck
WTF @ there being so much hate on the site recently
WTF @ Pancake not making a positivity thread to counteract it
WTF @ me giving up on my belief of him being the second coming of jacked Ghandi. For shame, you showed much promise
WTF @ Mongolians
WTF @ they breaking down the shitty wall
WTF @ too much southpark, I’m done


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Go get ya criminal enterprise on..

OUT NOW!! Available for Xbox360 & PlayStation3


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FB2 Battle Cypher Details

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http://oi42.tinypic.com/2rf7sb8.jpg%3C/div%3E

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This years battle cypher will work just a slight bit different than last years. I'll be closing it for a few days between rounds to try to keep guys fresh w/ their writing & not burn each other out. I think this potentially COULD be one of the better cyphers the board has seen in recent time, other than the NBL ones. As of late I'd say a favorite to get the #1 spot at the end would be Allen Knight because he simply just gives the most effort in these things. I could be wrong tho, & someone else could definitely emerge as top dawg.

Of course u should know, as I've stated in the rules in it's own thread, that there will be no double &/or back to back posting of bars. Drop 2 lines & move on until someone else can get in & drop their 2 lines. Breaking that rule will get u eliminated/DQ'd from the cypher.. w/ no chance of being judged for a 1, 2, or 3 spot.

I hope this thing can be entertaining for u guys in between rounds, & hopefully not be a failure like the one last year(tho it still had it's dope moments).

The winner of this shall receive an award under their name.

GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE PARTICIPATING!!


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Interview w/ Karaoke
By Sn00p

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Sn00p: Alright, I'm here with my old and totally black friend Karaoke! To start things off, tell us a bit about yourself. Where did you come from, how did you start text battling, where did you do it, how did you choose THAT name, since when have you been black and so on. Basically, give us the rundown of your text career!

Karaoke: Hi...
Lol at totally black friend. First things first, I am black. Faggots came up with the whole he's not black thing because they dont have any personals and I was checking these white boys for saying nigga all the time. I kinda have up on that tho because its a waste of time. They're safe here. Just know that, if they were in my hood and tried to say to my face, it wouldn't end well for them. So, neighbor, strikta and the rest of you faggots can say nigga all I want. I started on ripthemic, moved on to lyrikal war, 411hype, urbanauthentics, prowlers, rm and a bunch of other sites...I choose this name because the most important thing about Karaoke is that you have to watch what you say...hence me using the discussion board against u guys...

That is actually a very clever reason. I didn't know. So, it seems you have been around for a while. I mean, I've been doing this for some years now and I do not know any of those sites except for RM. When exactly did you start? Also, did you always use the current event style you are known for? And did you invent it? If not, who did?

Hi...
I started around 2001. Those sites are gone now. I started doing the current event thing on rm in 2005 because I wanted people to think that I was an alias. At the time, they weren't really feeling dudes they didn't have on their aim lists. So acted like an alias so people could take notice. I had a line that went “ I got big guns and I'll this they'll flare/ when I hit you with a clip longer than Inkwell's hair". If don't get that line just go on prowlers and look up his pic...I don't think that I invented it but I damn sure perfected it...
I was a freshman in college when I actually started battling. Before that, I used to ready battles and think to myself “I'm better than these niggas... I went to school in Harlem. The train ride was abt 2 hrs long so I used to write lines on the train...

So basically what you're saying is, you could never free yourself from your home continent's tendency to make kids take hour long trips just to attain some sort of basic education. That's a sad story to be perfectly honest. And the saddest part is that you and all those other little kids starving with flies in their eyes and worms and germs never had a choice. Well, guess what, now you have a choice. Because this interview is the interview of choice.
What we're gonna do now is sort of a game. I will send you a link. And I will tell you things that link could possibly be. Based on those descriptions, you will either click the link or not. Every time you get so curious you click it, I win. Every time you don't, you win. Okay?
Here's the 1st link (http://i.imgur.com/PR4sT.gif). And it's either a pair of Vintage Tits (NSFW) or two old bald men in a bar. Click or no click?

Hi...
LMAOOO...Man, I could've have gone to another school but the Dominican chicks made me stay...I met the girl that I'm probably going to settle down with at that school so Im not too mad abt it...I trust you Snoop so Im going to click the link and hope that its a pair of some glorious titties...

I've heard Dominicans are the secret tip when it comes to chicks in the US? Never had one in my life, but then again, I haven't been too close to the Dominican Republic either. Okay. So the next link (http://imgur.com/ynzqKyM) is either a bikini girl taking off her top (NSFW) or a surprise chair attack. Click or not?

Hi...
Dominican box is amazing. Dominican chicks are loyal. They love because I look Dominican. I had a Dominican chick who was my side chick for 5 years. She knew that I was never going to wife her and it pained her but she still fucked with me. Im going to trust you again. Don't let me down.

Word. Loyalty is a big thing with chicks. That and trust are the essentials, in my opinion.
This next link (http://i.imgur.com/T3hI6sO.jpg) is either a nice pair of tits (NSFW) or a man hanged for homosexuality (NSFL).

Hi...
Im not clicking that link...Its probably that faggot Bags in a pink tank top or some shit...

Okay, haha. Moving on, we have this link (http://i.imgur.com/V25v6.jpg): Either one girl in two pieces (NSFL) or two girls in one swimsuit piece (NSFW).

Hi...
Im not clicking that either...I was looking at the pics on that site from link 2...theres a pic of either a bloody vagina getting banged out by penis or a bloody penis banging out a vagina...maybe, both...shit was disturbing...I want to cry now...

Your loss. The count is 2-2, by the way. Next up we have this link (http://imgur.com/FErxPNC): Either a suprise cumshot (NSFW) or a suprise Patrick.

Hi...
Im not clicking that either...Wtf is a surprise Patrick? Is it a person or one of those weird sex pranks white boys like doing?
Bye...

Only one way to find out, haha. Anyways, this is our final link (http://i.imgur.com/7BZoMwI.gif): Scumbag Jesus or what might me the greatest tits ever (NSFW).

Hi...
Im going to click the link...Snoop, I swear if Jesus is doing some perverted shit...
Bye...

Hahaha. Okay. Enough with the links. But more choices: If you could pick one person in the tournament that will not be in the top 5 lists but that you can see doing well anyways, who would it be?

Hi...
Im going to say you...I would say Deon but hes facing me unfortunately...Not saying that you aren't dope or anything like that...But when it comes to top 5 on the site I think you and I are slept on...The lists are always Beyond, Neighbor, Dominate, Hush etc...But you and I have beaten most of them...Not to take away anything from them cuz theyre all dope...If Ive beaten you, u shouldn't be ranked higher than me...Which reminds me, you owe me a rematch in the near future...

Yeah, I really think that people have been underrating you a lot lately. They seem to forget that you've popularized the current events style that they are using.
But also, who do you think is overrated in this tournament? Or rather, whom can you see getting upsetted, when people would not really expect that?

Hi...
Exactly, Im not going to toot my own horn but I remember one time I battled Karp and won...the next time we battled, his whole verse was basically a flip of my verse from the previous battle...I posted a fresh verse and beat him again...But as far as overrated, I think Bags is ridiculously overrated...He was never good...But people on this site confuse discussion board comedians/trolls with the dope battlers...Not saying that you cant be both...but just because you MAKE FUNNY POSTS THAT LOOK LIKE THIS!!!...It doesn't mean that your bars are dope...Im here to battle, not socialize with you fuck niggas...I have friends offline...Don't get me wrong, some of you guys are cool but a lot of these dudes on here are corny as hell but niggas are quick to comment "roflzzzz" and "lulz" at that corny shit...Knock it off
Bye...

Shots fired. Lulz commented. Friends acquired.
Anyways, one last question: Which is your battle to vote on this round? Which battle should no one dare forget? What's the must-read?

Hi...
This one round is pretty much one sided imo...Closest battle is probably Frank vs Swerve...Blue Bayou vs Sintro should be decent if Sintro isn't rusty... Me and Deon should be good too...
Bye...

Alright. That concludes our interview. As a last choice, you can pick one person on netcees and either wish them death or a long prospering life. Who do you choose and what do you wish them?

Hi...
Malachi is the future of text...I wish the young lord a long and prosperous life #NoTyson...
Bye...

Haha, word. Pz, man.


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Look 4 nik-A to Grill the Competition..
Article by Strikta

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http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g307/Asanchez305/9330DB88-71CA-458D-8D4A-FE56EA5224FB-1542-00000113C67D60D6.jpg

Truth be told, even after everything nik has accomplished.. he's still underestimated & doesn't get the respect he truly deserves.

I've had a chance to witness nik's verses over the past decade+ & watch him beat some of the best competition text has to offer, the same goes for the current day too.. yet still.. ppl don't shake in their boots when they see themselves matched up against him.

Why?

Cuz Nik-A takes losses from lack of trying. I suffer from the same thing as a writer myself. This is something I look for the elder to correct in this tournament, & start crushing his opponents all thruout it. I mean hell, outside of this thing he practically carries his tag team.. & I've seen him knock off some decent names too. We all know what the dude is capable of.. it's just whether he wants to bring his A game to the table or not. I think he should.... & could.. & doing so would solidify & cement his legacy as a battler + have his HOF doubters clamoring for his overdue induction.

GET EM' NIK!! DO THIS ONE FOR CUBA!

....or the Dolphins & Ryan Tannehill lol


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Faggot of the Month [For the month of Sept.]

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http://oi44.tinypic.com/2irvy46.jpg


U guessed it, folks.

Hitman 5 aka Veritas!

Congrats, V... u did it man!

Good for u, faggot!! :)


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RD1 Predictions
By Sn00p, w/ Sn00p vs. Boredom prediction by Strikta

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Outlaw aka Neighbor vs. Meth

Neighbor is the man who needs no introduction around here: Having been around for several years (most of them suffering from chronic encephalitis unfortunately), finishing more than one tournament unbeaten, excelling at keystyle battles and the swagger & flow technique all the while showcasing his amazing multi-syllabic rhymes, there is absolutely no denying that he is indeed and by any means a text battler. But that description would do the rich social life of our hero no justice, for he not only has a girlfriend, he also possesses a multitude of pictures of said significant other, which he is keen on passing around text sites as if they were Bags' password or rumors about sexual orientations leaning towards the younger public. Yes, we're looking at you, Tyson. Anyways, as I said, Neighbor has never been one to need an introduction. He is battling Meth, who is another member of this site. Trying to predict this battle's outcome, all one has to do is look at Neighbor, for if Mr. Roid-Rage is not stuck in a wall with both his hands (we shall not dare ask him how they got there), he should remain victiorious in this bout. Meth has never been a pushover, but he has never been one to score upsets, either. Thus, my pick here is Neighbor. He has better wording, better concepts and better multies. Good luck to both contestants!

Cashius vs. Rawn MD

This is an absolute clash of styles: In the red corner, we have netcees.co's very own hermit crab, a man so hellbent on avoiding the discussion forum, one has to wonder what's hidden inside this peculiar animal's shell, and in the blue corner, we see our personal homeless guy, who chimes into any discussion with posts along the lines of "When I was your age, young grasshopper..." or "Well, it was about that time that I notice that girl scout was about eight stories tall and was a crustacean from the Paleozoic era..." or "Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering." Anyways, as interesting as this match-up is character-wise, as one-sided it is talent-wise. Cashius has been known as a top contender for many months now, while Rawn has been known to drink too much and disturbing the order by urinating in public when sleeping outside. In other words, Cashius is a very proficient battler, while Rawn still has a lot to learn. As much as I'm a fan of the underdog, I do not see any area of battling that Rawn exceeds Cash's capabilites in. Thus, I am pretty sure Cashius will win, but here's hoping for a surprise.

Alvin Karpis vs. Phuck Yew

With all my magical powers, I foresee this battle to end in a DQ. On the real, I would have predicted Alvin to win anyways. He's a better battler, and Phuck still needs to get a grip on the basics, which is well-illustrated by his swaying post, which showed he didn't even get the lines he was ranting on about. Yew, I think Alvin has understood that you are, in fact not Bayou. But maybe, he was merely saying that you are Bi, Yew. Anyways, it's all said and done, so let's move on.

Orc vs. UNFUKWITABLE

Can Orc fuck with the Unfukwitable? Well, judging from Un's votes and verses, he probably can. Un is still lacking the basics of text battling. Since he is rather new, that is, of course, to be expected, but it still means that he's the sitting duck in this battle. Or rather, the lying potato: He is slowly starting to grow, with sprigs sprouting out of his seemingly life-less body of text verses, but in the end, Orc will eat him like the proud Irishman he is. Conclusively, this is a rather one-sided battle, which will see Orc advance with a near 100% probability, but maybe we will see Un bloom in the future.

**Apparently Orc withdrew himself from competition after battles were posted**

Victor aka Hush vs. Knucklehead

Now this is a classical battle of the old against the new, the conservative against the liberal, the old and shrewd Jew with his fortune amassed from interest-mongering and selling children and eating children against the young and urbanized Dominican with monetary funds won in a lottery sufficient to buy a brand new car, not buy an own house AND hire a thpeech therapitht. All jokes aside, this could be one of the best battles of the round: Even though Knucklehead doesn't get as much credit, he has some notable wins under his belt and is actually good at text. He has also scored some upsets in his career. Here, he will need to do exactly that again, going against no one else than the netcees.com & netcees.co Hall of Famer Hush, who is known to have hard-hitting punchlines with very impactful wording, able to compete against the very best and easily dispose of lesser foes. Hush has once been described as not so much a text battler, but a comedian (I think it was David Lama who said that), and that seems to be very true: Few battlers can ridicule an opponent in such a devastating manner. However, if Knuckle can come with wording that in on par with Hush's, this will come down to a clash of styles, with Hush's comedy on the one side and Head's regular, holistic approach to battling on the other. And in that case, I can see voters favoring Knucklehead over Hush. Those are a lot of prerequisites however, so the safe pick is surely Hush.

ill nik-A vs. Cunt aka namesake

As some of you may or may not know, ill nik-A is rather old. In fact, some say that the statues on the Easter Islands were formed after nik's disappointed facial expression seeing how bad voting had gotten among the Mayans. Others say that the kings used to wear robes of red simply to symbolize their win in the pink slip battle of dominion (the actual color of pink wasn't available for clothes until a much later date). Be that as it may, he is also a very good text battler. At times, he is a little inconsistent, but in the tag tournament he has once again proven that he is a technically-proficient fighter, able to dish out haymakers like his 'no signs of hope' line. Cunt is rather unknown here. He is also new. I am not sure that I've seen him battle, but I think I do and I think he wasn't too spectacular. I could be mistaken however, and Cunt could score an upset because of that. But in the end, I predict nik-A to win rather easily. I will for sure read this battle though, to see if I was actually right about Mr. Cunt.

Blue Bayou vs. Sintro

This is one to stir up a lot of controversies: Some of you probably don't know, but these two had a really good and also really controversial battle back on the old netcees, which ended with Sintro being DQ'd for swaying. I do not remember details, but if I recall the situation correctly, it wasn't a clear decision that lead to much discussion. Anyways, Blue Bayou is a good text battler. On the other hand, he is also Canadian. But he does have really good wording. His wording is, in fact, one of his absolute strengths. It is very harsh and very direct, making his lines hit. He is also pretty creative and known for fresh wordplay. Sintro was also known as Medichi and has been around for ages, even though he tends to disappear for months or years. He has a very old school style of texting, but that is not at all a bad thing. He is also pretty raw with his hits. If both come up to their full potential, this will be a 50/50. However, we do know that Blue is not rusty whatsoever because of his battle against Neighbor in the NBL. We do not know how rusty Sintro is. That's why I'mma have to give it to Blue. I wouldn't be surprised by any other outcome, though. This will be one to watch. Potential battle of the week. Make sure to vote on this.

Bags vs. Shogun Dinero aka Gamble

The bully vs the bullee. The Brooklyn Boy vs the battler that has multiple personality disorder when it comes to voting on his own battles. The most dickridden battler to (somehow) hit the Hall of Fame vs the most hated antagonist of the whole txt world. Jokes aside, this should be interesting. We all know that Bags isn't actually that bad at text once you take his loyal group of dickriders away. (Sometimes I do like to imagine them as a pack of wolves, with Bags being the alpha male, preserving his position solely by the use of caps lock, as the five of them scavenge through the woods, sniffing for blood, preferably the blood of a black woman or a pregnant woman or some other sort of fetish woman that Bags can then persuade to copulate with him by the use of seductive text messages crafted with the help of the whole pack.) But we also know that Gamble has some sort of deep hatred for Bags. And that might motivate him to try his absolute best. And if he does, I can actually see him having a shot at winning here. So if all goes normally, Bags will win, but this one battle for upsets. Watch out.

J. Metts aka Joe Metts vs. PancakeBrah

The introvert quarterback versus the extrovert that'd sprain his back if he were to reach down for a quarter. And by extrovert I mean parts of his body hanging out. Pancake is in my opinion the nerdiest person on netcees. He likes weird music, he likes to be elaborate, he probably visits art shows with his fiancée of three and a half years and then spends the night playing Scrabble, winning by elongating her 'rim' into 'acrimony'. And Joe Metts is probably one of the people on netcees most likely to punish a nerd in real life. The question is, however, will he be able to punish him in the realm of nerds that the internet is? And the answer is yes. Yes, he will. Simply because he's always been a battler a lot better than average, while Pan has been an extraordinary boarder that never really felt at home in battles. While Pan typically excels in Topical Matches and has quite some swag & flow, he is just decent with punchlines. And Joe could hold his own when the greats of txt like Resin or Frac or Hens were still around. Thus, my pick is Joe in a rather one-sided battle.

Swerve vs. Frank Metts

The older Metts brother is no one to be taken lightly either. ... Yes. Yes, that was a fat joke. Anyways, as I said, Frank can come with it. He has humor and he can turn that into suprisingly creative punchlines. He might be rusty however, not having battled in a long time. And Swerve is a very polished battler that could take advantage of that fact easily. Which is why I'll have to go with him here. You can never count humor out, though. So make sure to read this, because this has the potential to become the battle of the round, if both come with it.

Karaoke vs. hotdogvendorman aka Deon

Jim Karaoke vs Celine Deon. Karaoke has been catching a lot flak lately for a style he was praised for on the old netcees. Also, a lot of people doubt he's black. Funnily enough, no one doubts that Deon is black. But that's probably due to the fact that he is a lazy ass janitor who takes shits on the company clock. Anyways, this has the potential to be one of the best battles of the round. Deon has been slouching from time to time, but when he comes with it, he has some of the nicest concepts around and good wording too. Karaoke on the other hand is really consistent and never drops the ball with good wording. In the end, this comes down to Deon trying. Judging from the performances he's given lately, he isn't too motivated, so we will probably see the more consistent battler come out on top. And that is Karaoke. This is a close battle though and can go either way. A must read for the round.

Beyond vs. Malachi

What Beyond lacks in depth perception, he makes up for with legal weed. Yes, that was an eye joke... but y'all must've seen that coming. Anyways, Beyond is great at text. He's very technical, but in a good way. Malachi is still new and still struggling to find his own style. I'm really hoping he will get there soon, as he shows a lot of potential, but it won't be enough here. Bey should take this rather easily.

God Of War vs. Defiant.

I'm surprised I don't remember these two going at it before. Especially, because they have similar styles to me. But maybe that's just both of them slaughtering the English language in ways that probably inspired Shakespeare to write “By mine honour, if I were but two hours younger, I’d beat thee. Methink’st thou art a general offence, and every man should beat thee.” GoW typically does it with his typos, Defiant with his wording. Anyways, these two are both good battlers. General perception sees GoW as slightly superior, though, because his typos do not actually affect his bars, while Def's wording hinders the impact of his otherwise nice concepts. And that very weakness will be the deciding factor here, in my opinion. Def's wording has been holding him down for some time now and especially in a big battle such as this, it will come into effect. Hence, I got God.

Philly vs. Arch. aka Solomon Grundy

Philly is known for his win streaks. Funnily, he is also known to dodge battles against top tier opponents. Even more funnily, he is known to piss his pants when drunk. And I don't think I remember people saying they've seen Arch piss his pants yet. Which gives him an immediate advantage, in my opinion. In fact, the ability to not piss your pants when drunk is heavily underrated. I'd even put it right up there with the ability to see with both eyes. Which is another thing Arch can do, unless I'm mistaken. So as you see, the advantage lies with him clearly. On the other hand, Philly is actually a really good battler. If he shows up, he'll be the favorite. Not by much though, because if Arch shows to his full potential, he can take on pretty much anyone on this site. But he seems to slack a little lately. Which is why I got Young Pissy despite all his glaring weaknesses. I wouldn't bet against Arch here, though.

Allen Knight vs. Destroyer

The automatic rifle against the behind of a goddess. Allen is a great boarder. Grimey though. And he's a good battler too, especially when he can convert some of that grime into punchlines. Because in that case, he comes with some relentless bars that just hit. Sometimes he gets lost in somewhat subpar wording though. Destroyer on the other hand is just not too good at anything he tries, for example his career. In battles, he's doing okay most of the time, but complaining all the time. Just like nik. Does that come with age? Anyways, Destroyer's got some bars and he's consistently good, but seldomly wowing. Which Allen can be. So on a good day, Allen can take this easily. On a bad day, this will be very close, a toss up even. And all jokes aside, these are two funny and skilled battlers, that'll make this worth the read, no matter who ends up winning. I got Allen though. Good luck to these two and all other contestants!

Sn00p vs. Shank Sinatra aka Boredom aka Alphabet

These 2 should be able to put up a really good show if both come correct. Boredom has been known to show flashes of good talent from time to time, tho I'm not too sure if he's actually beaten someone notable here.. I know he won a newb tourney a year or 2 back.. but that was then, & w/ lower level competition. Here against the big dogs he'll have to step it up if he wants to advance in rounds. Fact is tho, Sn00p is the all around better battler & has more experience, so I have to give him the nod based off that. Boredom is a sure underdog who has the capability to surprise some ppl here if he gives it everything. Hmm, bottom line tho... is that I've got Sn00p winning fairly easy tbh. We'll see tho. Show me something Alphabet.


________________________________________________


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Karpis eyes back to back majors in 13'
Article by Strikta

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http://i39.tinypic.com/eg6728.png

Ole blockhead himself... aka Bags' worst fucking enemy... aka 2 time SC champion, working on champing another big tournament.

Say what u want about Alvin Karpis, but dude got bars.. & bars for days might I add. I really haven't seen this guy lose really at all in the past time span of about a year.. it's like he's got a star in Mario that never runs out & he's just bowling thru the competition. Something tells me he'll get far in this tourney & most likely even win it given his consistency. Now don't get me wrong, he has threats.. but not many. The only thing I see hurting Alvin Karpis is.. well... Alvin Karpis.

If he drops how we know he can, he'll run thru everyone he's matched up w/ until he reaches the finals. THAT part I do know.. he'll DEF make it to the finals(Imo).. it's just whoever he faces when he gets there.. might just be the one to knock him off.

His run here will be more than interesting to watch.

Goodluck Karp!


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Strikta
10-04-2013, 03:51 AM
A Lil' Jessica Kylie aka MissRabbit Dedication

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http://www.hiphopstan.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Jessica-Kylie.jpg

http://www.hiphopstan.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Jessica-kylie-2.jpg

http://rapsandhustles.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/jessica-kylie-01.jpg

http://remingtonsangels.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/jessica-kylie-dynastyseries-52.jpg

http://i50.tinypic.com/15rjclj.jpg

http://i50.tinypic.com/2qxwdvq.jpg

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cO3T9QwxFFU/T-zz3R_seSI/AAAAAAAARR8/8VfUJau2eYI/s1600/jessicakylie-aka-missrabbit-1.jpg

http://www.plusbeauxculs.com/images/pics/jessica-kylie3.jpg

http://i2.wp.com/www.jessicakylie.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/Jessica-Kylie-Studio3103_RR.jpg

http://cdn.niketalk.com/c/ce/350x700px-LL-ce05f494_tumblr_m6kh9hQPnk1r02iemo10_500.jpeg

http://25.media.tumblr.com/52ba99d4a26a532b2d246695d53d8b63/tumblr_mh4v8wHTwd1rjb86co1_250.gif

http://www.thatshitbang.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Screen-shot-2013-04-19-at-4.27.25-AM-1-370x370.jpg

http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb414/Davian_Almonte/Jessica-Kylie-10.gif

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3032/3062518168_46053c5a34_o.jpg

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3163/3061678593_164e22be33_o.jpg

..Well, that's enough lol.. just thought I'd post some of her cuz she's a top 3 favorite for me. Exquisite feet & toes too. This bitch a 10, no brainer.


_________________________________________________




Sn00p's 50/50 Game
By Sn00p

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The Rules are easy: I will provide a link and give you two options what that link might lead to. If you click, I win; if you don't click, you win. WARNING: Images might be disturbing (think anime_boners or worse). They are labeled (NSFW=not safe for work; NSFL=not safe for life), so you know what awaits you. Choose carefully. Here's to curiosity!

EITHER what happens when an Elephant steps on your foot (NSFW) OR a bear's failed attempt to scare another bear (http://i.imgur.com/4WBo34L.gif)

EITHER an infected Spider Wound (NSFL) OR a sneaky Bunny Attack (http://i.imgur.com/WSqKPt8.gif)

EITHER girl on girl (NSFW) OR camel on camel (http://imgur.com/jLkZ5ua)

EITHER Anne Hathaway going topless (NSFW) OR a man jumping into an oncoming subway car (NSFL) (http://i.imgur.com/myKqPGW.gif)

EITHER a cute brunette posing naked (NSFW) OR a girl with a large penis (NSFW) (http://i.imgur.com/W3ARYUc.gif)

EITHER 4 sets of jiggling jugs (NSFW) OR 4 Napalm Victims (NSFL) (http://i.imgur.com/0hNxHJo.gif)

EITHER a brown and red corpse (NSFL) OR brown and red lovers (NSFW) (http://i.imgur.com/Hphh2.jpg)

EITHER a backseat shotgun suicide (NSFL) OR the beautiful Yvonne Strahovski (http://i.imgur.com/WAjGPRv.jpg)

EITHER Spongebob Squarepants giving himself a blowjob (NSFW) OR Sandy Cheeks dancing on the beach (NSFW) (http://i.imgur.com/XzTX3hN.jpg)

EITHER Superman's dick (NSFW) OR Superman's a dick (http://imgur.com/r/superman/YGZSUFb)

EITHER breast-bouncing smiling Katy Perry wearing Elmo (NSFW) OR Spatula-wielding amputee midget sexing Elmo (NSFW) (http://i.imgur.com/YcAyNtR.gif)

EITHER a trio of monkeys riding dogs OR a man getting his head cut off (NSFL) (http://i.minus.com/ibfP5f7JZChD13.gif)


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Current News & Events + Sports

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Miriam Carey identified as woman shot by police near Capitol

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1388658/thumbs/a-CAPITOL-BUILDING-404x304.jpg
Courtesy of AOL.com, click here! (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/03/miriam-carey-capitol-shooting_n_4040115.html?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing8%7Cdl1%7Csec1_lnk2%26pLid%3D386195)

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Tropical Storm Karen Taking Aim at USA

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1387699/thumbs/a-TROPICAL-STORM-KAREN-404x304.jpg
Courtesy of HuffPost, click here! (http://weather.aol.com/2013/10/03/tropical-storm-karen-forming-in-gulf-of-mexico/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing8%7Cdl7%7Csec1_lnk2%26pLid%3D385893)

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Browns new QB Hoyer Sprains Right Knee

http://a.espncdn.com/photo/2013/1003/nfl_a_hoyer_b1_200x300.jpg
Courtesy of Espn.com, click here! (http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/9766799/brian-hoyer-cleveland-browns-suffers-sprained-knee-buffalo-bills)

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Houston Texans' Reed & Foster Criticize "Shady" NFL

http://a.espncdn.com/combiner/i?img=/photo/2013/0930/mag_book-01jr_203x114.jpg
Courtesy of Espn.com, click here! (http://a.espncdn.com/combiner/i?img=/photo/2013/0930/mag_book-01jr_203x114.jpg)

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Senior Couple Charged in Decades old Cold Cases

http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/dam/assets/131002044036-dnt-kspr-couple-charged-with-murder-00000225-story-top.jpg
Courtesy of CNN.com, click here! (http://www.cnn.com/2013/10/02/justice/wyoming-cold-case-arrests/index.html?hpt=hp_bn1)

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Alabama Banishes Their Star Player, & Coach

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1388426/thumbs/a-HAHA-CLINTONDIX-404x304.jpg
Courtesy of SportingNews.com, click here! (http://www.sportingnews.com/ncaa-football/story/2013-10-03/ha-ha-clinton-dix-suspended-accepted-money-from-assistant-coach-alabama-nick-saban?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing8%7Cdl9%7Csec1_lnk2%26pLid%3D386164)

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Dwayne Wade Regrets Having 2002 Knee Surgery to Remove Meniscus

http://dy.snimg.com/story-image/2/1/4529513/182427-330-0.jpg
Courtesy of SportingNews.com, click here! (http://www.sportingnews.com/nba/story/2013-10-03/dwyane-wade-regrets-knee-surgery-heat-marquette-erik-spoelstra-lebron-james)

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Drake Debuts at #1, & More News to Note

http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/dam/assets/131002164442-drake-september-2013-story-top.jpg
Courtesy of CNN.com, click here! (http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2013/10/02/drake-debuts-at-no-1-and-more-news-to-note/)

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Tony Romo calls out Bronco's Secondary for Rough Play

http://www.gannett-cdn.com/-mm-/bea1383a34df0b999ff6b49fc18498352bb94b0c/c=0-0-2081-1561&r=x404&c=534x401/local/-/media/USATODAY/test/2013/10/02/1380763694000-USP-NFL-Dallas-Cowboys-at-San-Diego-Chargers-001.jpg
Courtesy of USAToday.com, click here! (http://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/nfl/broncos/2013/10/02/tony-romo-dallas-cowboys-denver-broncos-secondary/2912851/)

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50 Cent Imitates Lil' Wayne's Deposition Video

http://cdn.hiphopdx.org//images/news/1-1-50_Cent-Lawsuit-hhdx.jpg
Courtesy of HipHopDX.com, click here! (http://www.hiphopdx.com/index/news/id.21932/title.50-cent-imitates-lil-waynes-deposition-video)


_______________________________________________

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________________________________________________



Media &+ Vids

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Runner Runner Official Teaser Trailer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyboDr1e2xI

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Hunting the Radioactive Beasts of Chernobyl

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INAlUGn0RYg

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Gravity: Official Main Trailer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiTiKOy59o4

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2 Chainz, Feds Watching ft. Pharrell

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NttlPwNKd_M

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Meek Mill's Levels

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rh13do7fig

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Devin the Dude, What I be on (2010 CUZ I CAN LOL)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Vemm9YWqgk


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My few WTF's of da Week

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WTF@U niggas having 0 compassion for ur fellow NCG(s)
WTF@Washington DC right now!!
WTF@Swerve making this a section & just doing 1000 of em'.
WTF@Me letting some of these cats in
WTF@Me thinking Orc was a okay guy
WTF@Him being a stone cold faggotbox
WTF@GoW being rendered a mashed vegetable by a video game
WTF@All these pussy ass niggas up in here
WTF@The NY Football Giants.. Bwhahahahahaahaha
WTF@New England undefeated w/ no real talent on O other than Tom
WTF@How long this shit took
WTF@My Skins :(

Ehhhhhh WTF AM I STILL DOING UP FUCKING W/ THIS BULLSHIT!!


_______________________________________________




Outro

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I want to thank everyone who took the time out to be a part of this, or help out.. either or. Props to ya'll on that. Hopefully we can continue to bring u quality magazines over the course of the next rounds, in a more timely fashion. For this I apologize, but I'm not feeling too sincere when I say that. Forreal u niggas a bunch of thirsty assholes.. but it's cool.. I understand, I guess.

To the battlers, I wish all of u the best of luck here.. hopefully all our efforts combined can make for the best text tourney we've had since last years installment. I have faith & confidence that all of u can * will write to the best of ur abilities in hopes of bringing home that FB2 Championship title.

Peace, & G/L to u all.

__________________________________________________

© NCGs Strik n Sn00p Enterprises 2013

All rights to fuck ur mother reserved

Orc
10-04-2013, 05:25 AM
This was dope. My laptop smashed so haven't got access to show up which is why I dipped

ill nik-A
10-04-2013, 07:03 AM
Dopeness but I'm not trying

Key through the end

Ghost1
10-04-2013, 07:05 AM
This shit is super dope. Havent read it all yet.

namix
10-04-2013, 07:12 AM
really intense mag. lot of work. good shit.

Cunt
10-04-2013, 07:43 AM
without a doubt the best mag I've read on NC... Props.

Cashius
10-04-2013, 08:08 AM
Best mag ever. Props to all involved.

Sn00p
10-04-2013, 08:16 AM
Woah, goddammit, Strik. I didn't know you would do this much. Mad props forreal.

Strikta
10-04-2013, 08:36 AM
Thanks guise.
Orc, I remember u saying that. I thought I did something to u to piss u off. My bad man.

Yo, Sn00p lol them vids I have towards the bottom of the mag won't show for some reason.. the youtube ones. I have that Klaus Baudelere(Sp?) faggots video in the middle of the mag too.

They won't embed for me, & iono why.

Could u make those show up plz bro?

Sn00p
10-04-2013, 08:52 AM
Thanks guise.
Orc, I remember u saying that. I thought I did something to u to piss u off. My bad man.

Yo, Sn00p lol them vids I have towards the bottom of the mag won't show for some reason.. the youtube ones. I have that Klaus Baudelere(Sp?) faggots video in the middle of the mag too.

They won't embed for me, & iono why.

Could u make those show up plz bro?

Nope. Sorry. They've changed it. I don't know how to do it anymore. I'd go into the Admin CP and code some custom tags, but I'm not an admin anymore. Gonna need Meth, Knucklehead, or PancakeBrah in here.

Split
10-04-2013, 08:53 AM
sick mag.. whats up with the ads tho

Strikta
10-04-2013, 08:57 AM
The ads were to give it an authentic magazine feel is all.. just for fun.

Fuuuck Sn00p.. sucks because those videos are vital imo.

How are not admin anymore??? Ur like the best admin ever next to Bags when he tries.

StarFaggot
10-04-2013, 08:59 AM
without a doubt the best mag I've read on NC... Props.

This. And with Bags video mag this mag is epic. Love the NSFW pics.

Props to all involved with the mag.

Will leave detailed feed later

Sn00p
10-04-2013, 09:02 AM
The ads were to give it an authentic magazine feel is all.. just for fun.

Fuuuck Sn00p.. sucks because those videos are vital imo.

How are not admin anymore??? Ur like the best admin ever next to Bags when he tries.

I wasn't around much I guess? But it's really weird, because putting url tags around it should automatically display the video. It doesn't however. Hmm. I'll try something else and see if that fixes it.

Strikta
10-04-2013, 09:04 AM
Someone got it!

Shit.. every vid except for the one in section "Remember THIS faggot??"

If someone could get that for me plz. :)

Sn00p
10-04-2013, 09:04 AM
Okay, I've figured it out and it's fixed now, Strikta.

Strikta
10-04-2013, 09:11 AM
Nice.

Thanks bro.

Neighbor
10-04-2013, 09:19 AM
Amazing work

Best mag ever

Destroyer
10-04-2013, 09:31 AM
when you guys talk about my career, it hurts my feelings

Sn00p
10-04-2013, 10:48 AM
when you guys talk about my career, it hurts my feelings

On the real, weren't you some kinda freelance photographer not too long ago? Why'd you stop doing that? Because from an outside point of view, it sounds way cooler.

Strikta
10-04-2013, 10:52 AM
Shit, I forgot all about Des' photography skills.. he had some beastly snapshots I saw about a year or 2 ago on here.

Yeah wtf happened w/ that?

Swerve
10-04-2013, 10:55 AM
If taking shots of your junk and then sending it to bitches is freelance photography, sign me up.

Meth
10-04-2013, 11:32 AM
Skimmed it.

Good shit.

Read on full when home

Strikta
10-04-2013, 12:01 PM
If taking shots of your junk and then sending it to bitches is freelance photography, sign me up.

lol damn son.

King Karaoke
10-04-2013, 01:55 PM
Hi...

Good mag...
My fault abt the typos, I was heading home...

Bye...

Destroyer
10-04-2013, 05:54 PM
I still do that shit

Dominate
10-04-2013, 06:50 PM
Wow, Strik...


Best mag ever, .... like ever ever


Actually gonna take me a few sessions to read all of it... like a real mag


Great fucking job

Sho Money EMG
10-04-2013, 07:32 PM
Dope shit Strik. Lmao @ that pic u had of me, WTF where did u find that.

Nice work tho man.

Strikta
10-04-2013, 07:37 PM
Word, thanks.

Just googled Gamble Netcees & clicked images.

Ur ugly ass pic popped right up. lol

Sho Money EMG
10-04-2013, 11:04 PM
Word, thanks.

Just googled Gamble Netcees & clicked images.

Ur ugly ass pic popped right up. lol

Rodlll.. Haha that easy huh? Wow.
That pic was from like 5 years ago if not more lol. But thanks dog for the little paragraph made about me.. Didn't expect it honestly that was a cool gesture brotha... Great work

Alvin Karpis
10-06-2013, 02:27 PM
nice mag