WK1: Frank (0-0) VS. Mike Wrecka (0-0) [FRANK WINS, 9-1.]

[Split]

Verses are due Thursday 2/14 at 11:59 PST

Check-in's are not required, but if you do not check you will NOT be granted an extension.

Extensions are to be granted by the opponent before the deadline, and for 24 hours ONLY

You must vote on 3 other battles and post links. For every absent link, you will be deducted ONE vote next week.

If you no-show, you will be removed from next week and have to sign back into the league.


Topic:
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mblwz4RUbg1rz23who1_400.jpg

Good luck!

Mike Wrecka Frank

[Mike Wrecka]

check

[Frank]

moonsault

[Mike Wrecka]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mblwz4RUbg1rz23who1_400.jpg




got the weight of the world on my shoulders, and its makin me grin,
told my girl for her I'd move boulders, now im taking one in/
promised her the stars, the sun, the moon and the sky,
but so far all I've delivered, is reasons to cry/
and as the seasons went by, I started to question and wonder,
do these demons inside grow out of the stress that I'm under/
our home isn't a home, more like a collection of lumber,
since I lost my drive, my motivation, my hunger/
became encumbered, with the doldrums of life,
never consolin my wife until I got some golden advice/
loves an emotional knife, if the marriage is dead,
clouds and thunderstorms will cause damage ahead/
but things left unsaid, never spoke, gave me hope,
after all these years drowning, now im swimming, afloat/
taking a soak in the obvious, a stream of consciousness,
collecting all the pieces from these broken promises/
to my astonishment, she's still waiting, smiling,
so I'm gonna find for her everything that's worth finding/
whether that means climbing or deep sea diving,
from the mountain tops to the depths of the ocean, im trying/
even if it means flying, till me and space are colliding,
im redesigning constellations till our stars are aligning/
catch a ray of sun shining, place it in her hand,
so she understands, lighting up her life is the plan/
im a man with something to prove, a whole new attitude,
lets defy the laws of physics, just to get in the mood/
in an exceptional groove, breeze gives me a lift,
I just lassoed the moon, bringin it home as a gift/
ive roamed continents, we were apart like forceps,
now the fulcrum has closed, as I stand on the door step/
she steps outside and there's no mistakin shes in,
got the weight of the world on my shoulders, and its making me grin/

[Frank]

George Bailey: What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon.
Mary: I'll take it. Then what?
George Bailey: Well, then you can swallow it, and it'll all dissolve, see... and the moonbeams would shoot out of your fingers and your toes and the ends of your hair...


Michael swayed from back stage in a dazzling daze...
He appeared staggered in disarray.
Pupils - dilatingly, passively, opaque.
Everybody in the hallway was goin' crazy - cameras flashing in his face
(Bright light to the sedated mind, basking in the shade)
Trapped into the fame
Media maze, isolating him.
Camera flash and he's awake -
BLAST THE CAMERA
FLASH the camera
distract the masses from the stage!
LEARN this anthem!
BURN this anthem!
in the back of all their brains!
Michael that pressure had to be insurmountable.
Being that popular had to be impossible.
Now I know why you popped the pill in attempt to swallow solitude.
Pass away - We will honor you,
After all that IS the American way
African American veins - florescent skin - embarrassing phase
Clorox hue -
Shell of a man - pale in comparison of his fate.
Parents parents parents were slaves, you were carrying all the strain
You blossomed-you danced-into-the-day and died under Obamas rule
Who was responsible for your charismatic displays?
The king of pop could move... Who choreographed his dismay?
..You know I followed you.. that Double spin-revolving move -
And I still grab my crotch like I'm back in the day.
Because back in the day. I didn't see color. I heard magic and taped.
Back in the day you was my brother. Michael Jackson the great.
Today you covered your face and held your baby off a balcony of the paris estate...
Paris is wearing a Mask - his life is a masquerade..
Your forever changing - what ever happened to your face?
Your full nose - oval afro - your blackness - your race?
Your jack-o-lantern smile amping up the stage-
Flash it in our face!
Now they call you Wacko but they cannot assassinate
Your passion. Even if you are just a black hole plastered in decay.....
Who knows how many noes you had reenacted into shapes -
All I know, is your nose is pointed at the pyramids that backed you in the grave...
Somebody tried to flatten your cosmetic being and crash you out of space
Black or white. Androgynous. Out of wack. Are you insane?
No.... but we were all Lunatics when bad would play.
The whole world glided backwards with you - imagine the sprains lol
You were off the wall, you were a magnet, M.J
I remember the first time you did your anti-gravity lean
My mother said what's all that racket? I mean I had the classiest shades
Hair slicked into Caribbean waves, with a S curl I greased to a flap till it banged
I felt the pain like I was Janet or Jermaine, on that hot summer day you passed away
That night, I spun records around - like you were the only one who mattered and I made
The room move around and laugh - I entertained.
I was raised on your music... and here I was - your tracks, your trace
Your tracks, your pace, no mishap could erase
I know you were there.. Illuminated.. dancing away
Your spirit lives on. It's translucent - the canvas is blank.
The glove is off and the cameras away.........

We all have our darker sides - it's how we handle that phase.
Our light and dark moments foreshadow our change..
Cratered by our imperfections we synchronize as our planet rotates.
Drowning out all but the brightest stars in our massive terrain.
So don't tell me your shining - show me the glint off broken glass on the stage.
Where we are going isn't very far - just A galaxy away.
Man has much farther to go within himself,
So let us travel -let us pray
Understand what it means to be human.
Let us dance.
And let us sang.
One Small Step For Man -

not M.J.


The moon had been observing the earth close-up longer than anyone. It must have witnessed all of the phenomenon occurring and all of the acts carried out on this earth. But the moon remained silent; it told no stories. All it did was embrace the heavy past with a cool, measured detachment. On the moon there was neither air nor wind. Its vacuum was perfect for preserving memories unscathed. No one could unlock the heart of the moon. Aomame raised her glass to the moon and asked, “Have you gone to bed with someone in your arms lately?” The moon did not answer. “Do you have any friends?” she asked. The moon did not answer. “Don’t you get tired of always playing it cool?


Rest in peace to Michael Jackson,

Your friend,
moonwalk

[Split]

i got this later today. still buzzin/ dont wanna vote

[Geno]

This was a really dope battle.

Mike, my G..
You killed the relationship concept. Thought it was well done. Flow was pretty consistent and content held a deep sensitive side that brought a nice effect of realness to your words. Well crafted.

Frank, da god..
Dope verse. Started off a little rough.. was kind of hoping your whole verse was gonna be based on the qoute at the top. Would of been ill, but this shit was nasty regardless. Picked up as I read on and the concepts were prettydope and orriginal. The micheal jackson thing is pretty cliche.. but it worked with the topic I suppose.

This is a tough battle, and it really comes down to preference for me here.
Mikes content is dope, but I didn't like it so much with that picture
Frank went off in a few different areas that caught me off guard and had some real clever shit in his verse, for me.. that's what won this battle. Absolutely nothing against mikes verse, I got this one going either way tbh.. and wouldn't be surprised if its a really close vote count

V-frank

[Coup]

mic W

good fast paced, easy to read and to understand verse. Well balanced across the board in flow, scheme and correct imagery and narrative, which made this pic rep very very good..nice tie ins. I liked this line alot, and it is an example of your pic representation and your writing;

in an exceptional groove, breeze gives me a lift,
I just lassoed the moon, bringin it home as a gift/

good use of inner rhymes, though you were deficient on multies...that would bump this verse to a higher tier if you. could have incorporated more...another thing was that the moods, tones and emotions to the pic were kinda a gmick and I dare say a tad cliche. . . a more sick creative tone would have bumped this.

don't get me wrong I like this verse for it's ease in simplicity, readability and relevance....to say nothing of flow.


Frank--your middle (however long it was) passage was so fresh...it built and progressively got longer and more elaborate. I like the build up even if it was unintentional...rhymes were disco and fun. Now I was not following the opening dialog sequence and the closing...as how I should relate it to what I like about this piece, the middle.

great job reping MJ, he would approve im sure. you hit all the essentials: being yourself, reaming true, your loyalties to him and your ideals that are similar...The thing with using dialog and supporting characters in a verse to help establish context and mood is that it easily dilutes and confuses the piece for the reader if they are dropped and no pay off is there, though you are in expert in this because you wrote it and understand.

v MC

make no mistake Frank had the creativity in this one, that don't ness mean Mic did not. this came down to the wire

[Zen]

Mike Wrecka: Good drop on this one. You portrayed a relationship extremely realistic and in a way that made it seem new instead of the same old relationship shit haha. I thought the verse flowed very well because the inner rhymes but on some of the lines I felt that the multis were forced imo. That would have to be the main problem I see with your verse but still good man.
Frank: You took this a completely different direction. Very good creativity on this piece but I hated the way you structured this piece. I know it was mostly for aesthetics but I would rather just read the lines out plain like Mike's lol. But that's the only negative I have of this piece because to me this was fucking dope. Although it seemed a little too much praise to MJ lol, the flow was good as hell and some dope ass multis. Mad props on this.

Two very different styles in two VERY different directions. But I've got to give this to Frank. This shit is gonna go down to the wire though forreal haha. Good battle yall

[Camp Bell]

man, fuck am i doing?!...lolol

the battles ive saw so far were very detailed, dope writings. This tho. was epic in my opinion because seriously...who wouldve thought to implement the concepts that both of you did....with that picture!

Mike:

i applaud your effort because it was an enjoyable read...but, i think the relationship concept is so common that it's all the same, just put a different way. i dont feel your flow or vocab didnt set you apart from that but i will give you this, the writing was great. It was the most unexpected concept i've seen, in respect to the picture so far. good shit.


Frank:

MJ? Wow man, that was impressive. the structure kinda threw me off but it still read nice, smooth flow. exceptional vocab. i liked the dialogue at the beginning and end, showed exceptional creativity. this was crazy dope, not to mention a topic we can all relate to...micheal jackson.


this was a dope battle, i felt franks verse was the the better verse in all aspects. although, mike did have a solid drop, it just wasn't enough imo...good shit.


vote: Frank

[Geno]

Up

[dead man]

mike -

at first i wasn't sure exactly what you were doing with this, but it quickly became a very clear narrative. i think the idea of bringing the moon home as a token of love, of reconciliation with your wife was a great way to twist the picture. your writing is clear and straight forward - it has a very solid rhythm that skips a beat every now and then so it doesn't become monotonous. i think my main issue was that you sort of stayed surface deep. you outlined this problematic marriage and your chance at rekindling, using an array of literary devices (like the outer space portion) but never actually gave us glimpse INSIDE the marriage.. there was no gritty detail. even a line or two that humanized your characters and made me feel for you a little more emphatically. so much relies on relativity man. you have to break out of the purely allegorical and flesh out some character. i mean, you mastered this verse at a certain level. in the way you performed this type of interpretation, there's not much else to be done in order to make it much better. now you have the potential to dig deeper, and breathe more life into a piece so there's more than 2 sides to it. more than the face of the moon, and the face of your lady. like i said man.. for what it was, you pulled this off skillfully in a way that was fun to read. i really have no complaints on it. but just telling you that won't teach you anything.. and we've all got something to learn..


frank -

when i started reading the quote i was afraid you had taken this in the exact direction as mike. i was wrong. your tribute to michael jackson was, again, a really awesome way to push this pic to it's limits imo. i think what made this battle great was the vastly different approaches to the same image. probably my favorite aspect of these types of matches - assigned topics - is discovering how each writer sees the image for themselves. what it speaks or means to them. a chord it struck. obviously mike had a more interpersonal relationship-driven take on it, while you immediately saw the moon as a symbol for the legacy michael jackson. i mean it's dope man. i would have never thought to take it there and was actually really impressed with your execution. it was multi-faceted and sort of sporadic in classic franklin style. it was melancholy and morose.. it was mourning. it was happy memories and bittersweet laughter.. the summer-day flashbulb memory kind of had me stuck for a minute, because i remember the exact moment i found out myself that summer. there were certain portions, like the paris estate / masquerade bit, that i re-read a few times just because i wound up liking it so much. you have a repetitive tone in much of this piece that did, admittedly, grow a bit tiring because of the lack of your diversity in word-choice, but i felt like you were hammering in a point to some degree and in that sense it was effective. you employ strange devices-like-this-one and others, although its just something i expect from you now. that whatever you produce will be unexpected, but very profound in an odd, harlem subway sort of way. i almost felt closer to mike after reading this as ridiculous as that sounds. maybe it was just how you wrote it that struck a chord. anyway - i hope you continue to show up cause this is going somewhere.

while i thoroughly enjoyed both verses for different reasons,

my vote goes to Frank.


great battle guys. keep doing what you're doing.





1

[veritas]

First off Mike's flow was cool, and that stood out for me. What really stood out for me was the mind of the main character. I resonated alot with that. Being a father and dad, it does feel like the weight of the world is on the the shoulders, so I was feeling this for sure.

Frank came out the gate and at first I didnt see what was going on, and then, I got. How original! What a wonderful story! I personally feel that the story is paramount, and that the content of the story trumps the mechanics, so although I felt mike's was more technically sound, I found the story of Frank' to be more captivating and thus it gets my vote.

Excellent battle.

[Atheist]

Mike - Was very easy to follow as the flow was excellent.
im not normaly one for romantic/love type verses but this
is up there with the best of em that I have read, heres
a couple of lines I enjoyed.

taking a soak in the obvious, a stream of consciousness,
collecting all the pieces from these broken promises/

even if it means flying, till me and space are colliding,
im redesigning constellations till our stars are aligning/


Frank - Yea at the start I wasnt sure where your verse
was going to take me, but it seemed to draw me in the more I read
and in the end left me more than satisfied, nice job.

Because back in the day. I didn't see color. I heard magic and taped.
Back in the day you was my brother. Michael Jackson the great.

Now they call you Wacko but they cannot assassinate
Your passion. Even if you are just a black hole plastered in decay.....
Who knows how many noes you had reenacted into shapes -
All I know, is your nose is pointed at the pyramids that backed you in the grave...


In the end my vote goes to Frank, overall I just enojoyed it more, good
match guys

v/ Frank

[Split]

Frank.
We all have our darker sides - it's how we handle that phase.
Our light and dark moments foreshadow our change..
Cratered by our imperfections we synchronize as our planet rotates.
Drowning out all but the brightest stars in our massive terrain.
So don't tell me your shining - show me the glint off broken glass on the stage.
Where we are going isn't very far - just A galaxy away.
Man has much farther to go within himself,
So let us travel -let us pray
Understand what it means to be human.
Let us dance.
And let us sang.
One Small Step For Man -

not M.J.
the development of the story was spot on, personal touches everywhere, the flow was nice and not too technical but not sloppy. its connection to an icon that glows bright, fades, but you never think will go away. steps beyond a metaphor into practically an allegory. you could probably get that piece published. you could probably get it put on his damn grave.


Mike Wrecka, wrecker of typewritten mics
but things left unsaid, never spoke, gave me hope,
after all these years drowning, now im swimming, afloat/
taking a soak in the obvious, a stream of consciousness,
collecting all the pieces from these broken promises/
to my astonishment, she's still waiting, smiling,
so I'm gonna find for her everything that's worth finding/
word. the flow/ lyricism was your strong suit. you developed your character really well, not on a personal level, that's where Frank got you. some of the end rhymes werent exactly forced but felt artificial almost, idk, but still i hope no one assumes this is a blowout cuz

ive roamed continents, we were apart like forceps,
now the fulcrum has closed, as I stand on the door step/
she steps outside and there's no mistakin shes in,
got the weight of the world on my shoulders, and its making me grin/

can we just appreciate that conclusion


really dope battle. V/ Frank

[Malachi]

Really Nice battle

Mic Wrecka had a really dope stable flow, i enjoyed reading it alot. It went well with the picture. I like the concept he used for it too. I could feel the love in the verse.

became encumbered, with the doldrums of life,
never consolin my wife until I got some golden advice/
loves an emotional knife, if the marriage is dead,
clouds and thunderstorms will cause damage ahead/
but things left unsaid, never spoke, gave me hope,
after all these years drowning, now im swimming, afloat/
taking a soak in the obvious, a stream of consciousness,
collecting all the pieces from these broken promises/

One of parts i really liked, dope

Now for frank at first reading , i could tell your drop was going to be a great read. But when you got into it talking bout MJ and went away from these lines
George Bailey: What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon.
Mary: I'll take it. Then what?
George Bailey: Well, then you can swallow it, and it'll all dissolve, see... and the moonbeams would shoot out of your fingers and your toes and the ends of your hair...

i was kinda confused. But further reading your verse had great flow, and i really liked it. I dont think anyone else wouldve thought of that. You paid respect the right way and with that you came with the better verse

V/Frank

[Rawn M.D.]

Wow @ this style clash...

Mike - I really enjoyed ur story...at risk of being a little cliche, you still pulled off a strong verse...Flow wise it was clean as fuck, content was all on point, remained on topic throughout with some nice allusions relating the two. My one problem with ur verse was some of ur word choices...i feel sometimes you could have used better adjectives to express emotion and/or better scheme rhyme wise...everything was schemed perfectly don't get me wrong, but I just felt that u could have utilized the same scheme and just maybe thought of a better rhyming word, in other words took an easy way out at times (saying this out of constructiveness, and this is strictly a person preference,) maybe incorperated a slant here or there...non-the-less it was a dope verse.

Frank- Man, alright bro, that sht was entertaining, I will not lie. You can captivate. But I'mma be real with u as well...i love your scheming and u know this already, but bro sometimes that sht don't sound right like u off a syllable or suttin and it b fuckin up the way it sounds...and u make this sacrifice for the way u work the aa,bb,c,a,c, sht..but theres gotta b a middle ground...anyways, u took that topic for a ride man. Dope verse, just felt u coulda used a polish..or somethin.

I know both u for mad years now...and i feel the way mike's sht reads is more smooth, while frank's sht just entertains the reader...anyways; just being real w both yall

I gotta go with Frank on this..

[King Ra.]

FRANK WINS, 9-1.