insomniatic, she wrote

[dead man]

murder





cigarette electric. diminutive, my intro: introspection
salutations Mr. Black. meet Mrs. Misconception
this is a test. it's been an honor. time to go, goodbye
tie a rope. you're Robert Paulson. fight until you die
hyper focused, isotopic, rhyme consultant, why
do i spark with twice the voltage only trying half the time
watching others follow til it almost seem cliche
to write away your pain. hey, farewell, auf wiedersehen
honey's home. i waited, shrinking children in my comfort zone
rushing home from social events to catch a buzz alone
nothing new, but nothing old. lunchables and tea for 2
after all, it's me and you. cafe cups and vehicles
landing where the eagle flew. bask in my ineptitude
asking for recluse while i imagine standing next to you
breakfast food is symbolistic of a happier place
pancakes and bacon. nostalgia is my dragon to chase
pencil graphite arrangement. rubber pads to erase
passive mistakes. sweaty palmprints masking your face
make me your fate. it's already late, i'm already close
to falling from grace. make it okay, make me your ghost
i'll follow your notes. melody plays, harmony floats
we are one. beyond bipartisan votes. carbon and codes
artist's remorse. garbage or gold? scrap it or post
i am jack's dual lives. insomniatic, she wrote





deadman

[NYCSPITZ]

this nigga posts in a thread about pancakes, witnesses niggas smoking fake stogies and watches fight club youtube clips then posts a nice lil collage about it. lmao!!!

[dead man]

nyc i think you are my spirit animal

[Wise Wiggles]

lol..

slide

[dead man]

you/
don't know where i've been, Lou/

[dead man]

you/
don't know where i've been, Lou/

[big baby]

watching others follow til it almost seem cliche
to write away your pain. hey, farewell, auf wiedersehen
honey's home. i waited, shrinking children in my comfort zone

stellar

[PancakeBrah]

big baby only liked that part because of the foreign language part to try and seem uber smart.

he only liked the uber part of this post.

[Destroyer]

I like this

[NYCSPITZ]

word...the fuck is auf weidershen my nigga...

[dead man]

its ok.. his au revoir/warped cigar sort of inspired that anyway

pancake did you ever play return to castle wolfenstein

[PancakeBrah]

idk what that is bro. your allusion is lost on me.

[Certain]

stop posting this

its just about my least favorite of your verses

[Certain]

I'm kidding, though.

[dead man]

i get it

pancake it was a ps2 game with difficult bullshit enemies called uber soldats or literally "super soldiers"

[NYCSPITZ]

[QUOTE=NYCSPITZ;230999]word...the fuck is auf weidershen my nigga...[/QUOTE

auf wiedershe n akjhdslehwkjbsdkj da fuck it mean

anybody doesnt have to be dead man black diabetes

[dead man]

goodbye

[NYCSPITZ]

dawg thats 2 words tho germans r weird nazis imo

[Wise Wiggles]

cigarette electric. diminutive, my intro: introspection
salutations Mr. Black. meet Mrs. Misconception
this is a test. it's been an honor. time to go, goodbye
tie a rope. you're Robert Paulson. fight until you die
hyper focused, isotopic, rhyme consultant, why
do i spark with twice the voltage only trying half the time

^ butt‘r

Although I felt the Bob part was a tad lazy.. The muh‘fucka was running and got dome blasted. Lol not a big deal. I know you probably didn't take all that much time on that line..

[big baby]

big baby only liked that part because of the foreign language part to try and seem uber smart.

:o

its ok.. his au revoir/warped cigar sort of inspired that anyway

:)

The following line of what I quote I liked as well.

[big baby]

I'd like to think my snippet about comfort zone in another thread about you is what also lead a little off kilter, but particularly well written deadman in this writing.

[dead man]

es posible

[NYCSPITZ]

yo lmaooo !!

[CopyPat]

blackness. great post dude.

hyper focused, isotopic, rhyme consultant, why
do i spark with twice the voltage only trying half the time

haha that was too sick. for some reason i have a feeling that was ur least favorite section in this verse though, but its dope.

always good, you know whatsup, not much more i can say that u havent heard already, keep posting!!

[Certain]

Like a lot of your recent verses, this verse is scatterbrained but occasionally beautiful. I like that you've incorporated a better blend of specificity and concrete imagery alongside the more aloof and conceptual writing.

As far as the words themselves, I didn't like the line "breakfast food is symbolistic of a happier time" because it preceded a much more effective and evocative line that relayed the exact same concept. There were one or two spots were the cadence shifted slightly, but for the most part that was right on your mark of expertise.

I am pretty sure there will be a topical tournament held to start 2014, and I hope you will join to refocus your writing a little outside your own world. Stuff like this and another recent one seem to reflect the stasis you have found in your writing. The content here seemed almost sad for itself, which is not an insult but rather a charge, that maybe it's time to turn another corner.

[FR33KtheG33K]

when i was reading this my mind was going bonkers, sporadic, but i like it .. just my cup of tea. good vocabulary too bruh, no filler..thats pure peruvian fishscale.

[oats]

breakfast food is symbolistic of a happier place

1. thanks for the cosign
2. symbolic?
3. dope verse, per usual