ITT: I tell you how I would murder you in cold blood

[Fig]

Gugugugoooooooooo

[Wise Wiggles]

Blast off

[Certain]

You wouldn't. Would you?

[Witty]

Me.

[Wise Wiggles]

I want you to really take your time and think it through. Don't half ass this.

[PancakeBrah]

?

[veritas]

Come at me.

[Fig]

Blast off

Me and you would be huffing wd-40 behind a Lowes, then I would smash your whole frame into the ground with a brick until you were flat like a pancake. Then I would have sex with your sister and her slutty friend from the 90's on top of your body

[Sharp]

go for it

[Fig]

You wouldn't. Would you?

I would follow you around for the rest of your life, and every time you made a grammar mistake, that same night I would carve the correction into your flesh. It'd be like tatoos except all scaby and done with a spoon.

[Fig]

Me.

Witty I.would hog tie you up while 40 little midgets dressed as leprechauns ran train on you. then during rest periods, I'd feed you lucky charms with the marshmallows carefully picked out, and cut your fingernails way too short for it to be comfortable. Eventually, I would end you by peeling at your leg skin like string cheese until you died from the pain

[Witty]

I feel strangely aroused.

[Fig]

?

I'd give you a jack daniels enema then trick you out as a sperm bank for some tribe ass African bitches. Their nipples are as callused as your urethra will be once you're pumping out 200 - 300 loads a day, and all the children you make will grow up to pump the same amount of seed into you until you drown in it.

[Fig]

Come at me.

Id kill all your animals at night and in the morning, you'd catch me butt naked in your yard, chained up and tryna act like a dog. You'd go to call the cops, but a throwing knife would whizz past your head and stick into the side of the house. You'd look at me, and I would be fully clothed again but holding your head, which upon noticing you would die instantly

[big baby]

me

[big baby]

also loling @ the certain one

[big baby]

Id kill all your animals at night and in the morning, you'd catch me butt naked in your yard, chained up and tryna act like a dog. You'd go to call the cops, but a throwing knife would whizz past your head and stick into the side of the house. You'd look at me, and I would be fully clothed again but holding your head, which upon noticing you would die instantly

repped. figs on point this past week. He takes BOTW. Beat me out considerably this past month. loling.

[Fig]

go for it

I wouldn't kill you. I'd be like, go home kid, then keep fucking your mother

[Fig]

me

I would have old gypsy women with long fingernails and penises rub your dick with Rogaine, until it grows a mustache, then id higher jeff Dunham to make it look like it was talking by opening and closing your foreskin. If you do not have foreskin, one will be provided for you. Then id have a death metal drummer beat your nuts around with the double bass pedals like the levers on a pinball machine, until eventually you threw up your whole skeletal frame

[Frank]

Shoot

[Certain]

If you do not have foreskin, one will be provided for you.

[Fig]

Frank I would pm you like a whiny bitch until you died from exhaustion

[Frank]

Kill yourself

[Fig]

Kill yourself

how

[El Muffin]

you wouldn't. dare

[Fig]

you wouldn't. dare

id eat your moms cooch so rough and ferocious like that it would somehow create a time warp that get contained in her puss. you would physically be pulled through the air, no matter where you were, and back into the womb of your mother. itd be beautiful

[big baby]

HOF thread

[Vulgar]

id eat your moms cooch so rough and ferocious like that it would somehow create a time warp that get contained in her puss. you would physically be pulled through the air, no matter where you were, and back into the womb of your mother. itd be beautiful

Black hole cunnilingus

[anime_boners]

God damn this thread is powerful. Sad I missed it.

[Split]

kill me like one of your little French girls

[StarFaggot]

Tell me Fig

[Fig]

kill me like one of your little French girls

I'd split open the seam of your nut sack, and sow it into mine, then I'd swing us on a merry-go-round until you separated and bled out on the school blacktop.

[Fig]

Tell me Fig
I would cross breed your seed with a goat, and raise the child in a secluded area where I convince him that we're the only people, besides you. You would wake up to this emotionally unbalanced goat man in your bedroom, with your families blood soaked in his matted hair. Despite this, you'll realize that he's all you have now, and I'll wait until your attached to him to murder him, leaving you with nothing. Wouldn't kill you. That's too easy.

[Vulgar]

dead

[oats]

please say it will be with the food of your people

[Certain]

oats, if you go at Mexican food, you go at me.

[oats]

I go at mexican food like it's life or death. I was saying if I could be murdered, I'd like to be murdered with mexican food somehow. pools of hot sauce at my feet. Certain aren't you puerto rican?

[Certain]

Nope.