King Ra.
04-13-2013, 04:48 PM
AOWL Magazine
presents....
"The 2nd Coming"
[End of Season & Playoff Outlook]
***Week 9 Edition***
Putting in work once again, welcome to the week 9 edition of the AOWL magazine, the hottest mag on the net. We're only a few more weeks til the end of the season & the playoff race is looking hot. Competitors are jockeying position and there could be some epic match ups & daunting upsets in this final stretch. Who will be crowned the first ever regular season champ? Get ready for the biggest magazine of the YEAR. Holler.
http://youtu.be/c9mmBD_54M8
OPEN MIC FEATURE #1
"America.. The Land Of The Not So Free" (Ft. Aesthetic & nO GoOd!+)
written by Just Write
Desolate lands, turmoil, spastic catastophes
"Land Of The Free.. Love, Sex, Pain, and of Agony".
Nothing to gain confusing compassion w/apathy,
state tightens their reigns applying shackles to hands n feet.
Can it be real? Poison enters our digestive systems
A generation of chem trail and pesticide victims.
Exploits of micro-electroids stay coursing our blood,
how are we to stop a process that has already begun?
High strung Politicians with their volatile missions,
control the populace; a fraction in coffins or prisons.
Are we really sick, or is it government inflicted conditions?
Conspiracies to truths its all still pestilence driven.
Im sick of being lied too, 9/11 I despise you.
Gotta Ruby Ridge mindset too ride too.
Swine flu? How the fuck does the strain mutate?
im sick of being told too Contemplate Fuck that, I oughta meditate.
Either accept or disrupt this fucked F.e.m.a. mindstate.
Shit journalists cant investigate; they dissipate.
Implicate a higher stature; one with love minus the actor
Why the fuck would I support a nuclear reactor.
When nuclear testing got half Nevada wit cancer.
Where's the love, we getting fucked with compassion.
Osama bin ladin largest emotion manipulation.
Im tellin you; ignore stipulations.
wish these active elitists would say something n actually mean it
instead of promising action then passing us grievance
recite the mantra of heathens, that "do unto others"
the only land where a man will turn his back on a brother
we used to have compassion of mothers, now its void of its fathers
no trust in our sons, I see corruption in daughters
this is an ode to the land of the free.. home of the brave
the only nation where we sell our own souls for some praise
despicable slaves, you make me sick to my stomach
you're only free till you realize the grip of our government...
our nations on black out, running with broken lamps
and the only way to stop it is to get off our asses and make a stand.
I'm sick of the actions of government agencies,
cloaked in secret factions. Lies from a to z
its crazy, see people are deserving the truth,
I step aloof around the topic, like a bird on a roof..
the youth is diluted, so seek the truth if you choose it
this is real life son and my proof is in music..
Ive seen and experienced the worst of ways
people can suffer, as I've thrown the dirt in graves.
Listen, its a mission I'm on to see it through
and it affects everyone I talkin with, be it you.
I'm a soldier see, known to be cold as ice,
fuck the government, reach for your dreams...
and hold it tight..
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc1wxrLwtd1rpk8vu.png
BRING THAT BACK!!! (A Recap of Week 8's Match ups)
While there were many one-sided victories in week 8, we saw 3 very interesting match ups go down to the wire. So in this edition of 'Bring That Back!' we will take a closer look at those match ups & do a quick round robin of the others. Keep up with me.
Adonis (4-1) got back on the winning side of things with a pretty solid 7-1 win over Nigma (4-2), who for the first time in as many weeks, got involved in a match up that was decided by votes & not a no show. Pretty surprised at what Adonis was able to put together despite mentioning that the topic was pretty unfavorable. Readers felt he crafted a nice piece though & a few Nigma mishaps may been what hindered him from getting more votes. Adonis now has a 2-match lead in the White division & is competing in a #1 contenders match once again this week. Nigma remains in the lead in the purple division having the same record as myself & a tiebreaker edge because of the NS win over me as well.
fenix osiris (1-0) & Just Write (0-1) both made their debuts last week with fenix pulling off the knockout, 7-0. Just Write did completely the opposite of what his alias says- well, he BARELY wrote anything. Though many stated that they saw much potential from the little they read. With both joining so late in the season, they have a lot of work to do in order to get in the playoffs. Fenix is on the right track. A few more wins & he may just catch Red glare or even overtake Cereal_Killa for 2nd place in the Orange division. Just Write is in a tougher position, with Adonis, Vulgar, a fast improving Zenland & still a potential threat in Kuja (now known as Atheist) far ahead.
Cereal_Killa (2-1) came out with the pink to hand Witty (3-3) a 6-3 loss. If the color of carnation can get you a win, then I would just have to type every piece I do in pink from now on. No lie. But seriously, this battle was somewhat surprising. How so? This had BOTW potential but honestly fell pretty short. That's not to take anything from both pieces, but they both can come even better. So don't sleep. In the end, CK was able to draw the readers to his side with a very well written, deep story. And the story seemed to be where Witty didn't pack enough of a punch, though it is one of his better strengths. Witty remains in 2nd place in the Green division, which looks like Frank will take. His playoff hopes aren't dead, but he will need to put together a solid stretch to land a spot. Cereal_Killa is now only 3-matches behind Red in the Orange division. With a win & a loss by Red this week, that lead will cut down to 1.
Split (4-3) picked up a much needed victory last week over c.d.m. (2-6) with a smooth 6-2 win over the Mental Assassin. It has been that kind of year for c.d.m. even though he has put together some really great pieces of writing. This match, Split was far too superior and for the first time this season, I believe we witnessed Split at nearly the top of his game. While he got the majority of votes, some readers stated that his piece was a bit too "wordy" or "complex". But it didn't knock the amazing idea he was able to put together to get the victory. Split is currently 3rd place in the Red division, behind new AOWL champ, Zygote & high riser, IAmBenT, who has been on a tear. His playoff hopes are still very much alive. c.d.m. is in a more difficult situation, but still has a chance to make a late run. He is 3rd behind TopicalDood5 & division leader pohfig. If there is a writer who can still contest from far behind, Veritas is that writer.
TopicalDood5 (3-0) is starting to really pick up steam. I guess now we wonder how far can he go? He picked up a 7-0 knockout victory over the Zenmaster (4-4) & remains unbeatened. Despite the one-sided gap in votes, readers were highly impressed with Zen, and from the beginning of the season, he has steadily improved. Dood's verse was just more better, very well written, deep with strong schemes & word choice. Dood has quickly put himself in a good position to overtake pohfig in the Yellow division. A win this week will put him in first place & more than likely a #1 contenders match. Zenland is still in the thick of the playoff race. Despite being in 3rd in the White division, if he manages to pull off 3 wins, he will secure a guaranteed spot in the playoffs & with his skills improving every week, it shouldn't be difficult.
Aesthetic (0-3) returned to the topical scene only to lose once again to Objective (2-2), 6-3. Not many readers were impressed with the stories provided, but Objective managed to put together a much more solid piece to take the win. A more emotional piece with solid mechanics, OBJ topped the storytelling of Aesthetic, who had a great idea/concept, but poor word choice hindered him from taking this match up. His shot at making the playoffs will be difficult, especially with 3 very polished writers ahead of him in his division (Frank, Witty, ZeeDee). But he could play the role of underdog and pull off some upsets. Objective is second place in the Blue division, in which he & Mike Wrecka look to be the only active members barring more new writers joining the league. If Mike loses in this weeks championship match & Objective pulls off a win, he will only be .5-matches behind for the division lead.
Vulgar (2-0) managed to get past Ink (3-2), in a tight 7-4 victory which featured two of the best pieces written in week 8. Vulgar was able to get 4 straight votes to take a 4-1, lead, before break away in the end to hold on. It's very hard to go up against V but you have to like the valiant effort Ink brought to the table to make this match a good one. It was Vulgar's strong concept & top-notch word choice & imagery/detail that gave him the edge at the end which overcame a few mistakes from Ink. Ink, however, is in sole possession of first place in the Black division, ahead of dead man & TYSON (who returns to action this week) & Vinzr (3-2), who is one a hiatus & who knows when he will return. If things continue the way they are, Ink will solidify one of the top spots come playoff seeding. Vulgar is off to a hot start. He trails Adonis (4-1) in the White division by 2-matches. He will return back to action week 10.
All reigns eventually come to an end. This one nearly kept going though. Frank (6-1, 3x AOWL champion) finally suffered his first loss of the season, losing the championship match to zygote (6-1) in a very close rematch in which Frank won previously. The votes went back & forth for the majority of the time, but zy managed to get enough down the stretch to dethrone our 3x champion. This match featured two very good writers, both of whom are very consistent as well, which made this such a intriguing read. It really came down to preference & zygote, on this second time around, was able to put together a story that gave him that slight edge over Frank. Frank remains at the top of the Green division & is the Titanium Conference's current #1 seed. Don't be surprised if he manages to make his way back into a championship match. zygote is the Red division leader as well as the Platinum Conferences #1 seed.
So now, we will present to you our BOTW & VOTW. Congrats to all involved in the voting & to those who received this weeks nominations.
BATTLE OF THE WEEK
Red glare (5-2) over pohfig (4-2)
pohfig has done nothing but contend against some of the best writers in the league this season & each time it has been close. This time however, Red glare was able to get the last two votes & secure a much important victory. pohfig actually took a 5-3 lead late & one or two more would have got him the win, but in the last moments, Red got 4 votes in a row. The storytelling by both of these gentlemen was ridiculous. Not only that, but they both did very well mechanically while having strong imagery & word choice. No wonder this went back & forth. Let's revisit both of these amazing pieces.
POHFIG's VERSE:
"My reminiscence.
A cyclone of high hopes and tight-throated gasps -
Reigning my parade of restraints leaving the sights overcast.
Internal turmoil that leaves your sides broke and black -
forcing a physical spasm that would make a blind hostess mad.
A sigh - forced and drab - no ones as passive as you, pal.
Hesitant movements prove the gap between action and morale.
Your masking, with your laugh, how tedious it feels
to be someone that gained himself the measliest appeal.
Two sides of the brain and both believe that its surreal -
Your own mind can't remember when the evil was revealed.
A Dr. Jekyll proctor vessel to a frolicking beast
that's tangled in his own mess worse than Socrates' beard.
I always thought that for such a lovely river, the name is mystifying:
Cape Fear.
Spring Break. A crisp lake - or was it a river that we're on?
I can't differentiate because you opened the liquor back at dawn.
Whiskey - black - we're bombed just here to sit relaxed and gawk.
Floating in an inner tube - provoking chicks in rafts in thongs
to flash their titties at us some. You'd give'em flack or yawn
if they didn't have the gall - since when was your gift of gab that strong?
Yelling at drunk dudes like you know Kung Fu - while you move like a beast.
So tossed you think you could take on Sun Tzu and the Zhou Dynasty.
The dudes might just beat you quietly if you keep moving that mouth -
and why's your chest so puffed up when you usually slouch?
Cape Fear - where your fears are caped while you're boozing about.
Where the fork in the road causes misdirection if you're tuning it out.
When the only thing to fear on those enchanted summer nights was that the magic would end and real life would come crashing in." Cape Fear, 1991.
Back at bay - a scant escape - an ass to chase on the beach.
A body so tight your lungs close..with thighs that can make the release.
So much debauchery across the scene you'd be crazy to leave
but this is your last night here so act like you beat a major disease.
You can't fake the deceit - the alcohol muddles your judgement and sense
until your dressed in lies that tomorrows sun will undress.
When you return home you'll be replaying conversations under your breath
that you wish you could relive next summer recess.
Hunched and regressed back to the characterless life that you know -
where you runners high comes from having to sigh as you go.
You live a life in the open - confined to your hopes
and going nowhere slowly within a mind you've outgrown.
HIGHLIGHT VOTE- by Split.
Pohfig. initially thought you went overboard accentuating the tiredness/ hesitation. good structure, not wordy. interesting word choices all around. I like how the diction mirrors the idea that youre basically, chasing the desires of pastime in the present, but since you're older you dont realize you have outgrown them. i dont think theres some nuts metaphorical relationship between the lake and and the story. i didnt catch one at least, but you used the quote well.
strange contrast between first stanza and second. I tend to not like multi-sectioned verses because theyre so jumpy and feel more like theater than a story or a song. but ok.\
When you return home you'll be replaying conversations under your breath
that you wish you could relive next summer recess.
Hunched and regressed back to the characterless life that you know -
where you runners high comes from having to sigh as you go.
haha okay i see how you pulled it together here.
i guess, also, that the serenity of the river that seems to hold still is also like, usurped by the suspicion that it can kill swallow you whole. which is a dope connection to the subject matter which may have been intentional.
even if you dont deconstruct it that much, i loved how this was packaged.
RED GLARE's VERSE:
The weight of the world is almost featherless; for a seven year old - strown with benevolence.
A super imagination, he honed, all alone in his desolate catacomb of repressiveness.
The dark hole of eccentric bliss.
Where ideas light up - glow degenerate - zones of censorship,
Cold fluorescent mist.
The wandering thinkers' slow stroll through sentiments.
His 7 steps through the flashes of brilliance - bulbs from the genesis.
The beautiful home of intelligence - now under my control of the red abyss.
The frontal lobe. A funneled globe. Spun below rove of the mega ships.
Heaven sent roads from the cerebellum closed for connectedness.
Construction workers along the information highway - place orange cones in concession
Spikes thrown with deterrence.
The wheels turning; but the minds slow to detect the strips.
We are tired; worn out; run down; flat.
But we continue to roam directionless -
Unknown elements float into my domes nebulous.
Droves of pestilence latch on - rode through exodus.
My craft is departing - leaving behind ideas; Dust bowls of irrelevance.
The old testament of recklessness the stories of redemption; told by the treacherous
Get on the phone with the president.
Tell him the future is full blown in blemishes.
"Today America lightens the load;
The world as we know it is crashing in; we are moments from detriment.
A large abstract structure approaches earth - prone for prevalence.
A million light years traveling through our galaxy - a boulder of detritus.
You have less than an hour before comatose, in it's eminence.
Evacuate on my command" he states in his low baritone of emphasis.
"These scientist say an eroding edifice can be heard barreling towards us with bestowing resonance."
We are the tumor - the node of negligence.
The presidents voice could be heard now, bold and tremulous.
The Blank expression on the mans face shows no embellishment.
"God bless your soul; and may your spirit uphold the blessedness"
The ideas gathered; frozen in restlessness
In their humble abode; looking for leadership -
When the main idea rose from the residents.
"Who will be the Big Idea chosen to settle this?"
The thoughts looked around at each other - noble - but hesitant.
"The world needs us more than ever; now who'll be the last hope for Centaurus?"
A 7 year old Clark Kent; stood amongst the men lowly; depressed
His mother said;
"My son can save the world; he is the heir to the throne of Persepolis..."
A preadolescent figure came forward, shown no acceptance.
The world was seconds from it's first mode of progression.
"The human race is fucked as we know it - cloned for it's celibance."
The Ideas turned off the T.V. and threw the remote at the television.
The 7 year boy was left to grow up in his moment of excellence.
His chromosomal genetics defied the codes of kinetics.
The devastation hit earth - sending strobes as it's messages.
As it is told... Super-Man had flown like Pegasus.
Cape draped over his shoulder;
S - golden yellowish.
HIGHLIGHT VOTE- by Mike Wrecka
red glare - another sick verse. your multis and complex structure is really impressive. you bounced back from last weeks verse, which I thought was your weakest so far in this league. this one was back up to that elite level.
Where ideas light up - glow degenerate - zones of censorship,
Cold fluorescent mist.
The wandering thinkers' slow stroll through sentiments.
His 7 steps through the flashes of brilliance - bulbs from the genesis.
The beautiful home of intelligence - now under my control of the red abyss.
The frontal lobe. A funneled globe. Spun below rove of the mega ships.
Heaven sent roads from the cerebellum closed for connectedness.
pretty insane stuff right there. I was recently writing a verse using black abyss as a multi and its interesting to see the different words that can connect to red abyss. anyway. ya only criticism, cause for some reason I always point out the one thing I don't like, your work right here wasn't as accessible as some of your past work. and that's a big thing to me. as far as im concerned the average reader should be able to grasp it right away. not feel a bit perplexed by the verbiage. which im a bit embarrassed to say , I was at times in this verse. I had to read some parts twice and was like ahhh. but ya , the complexity of the structure and flow you used was leaps and bounds above most. and that impresses me. good work..
VERSE OF THE WEEK
Only one verse stood out from the rest & it came down to Adonis & Cereal_Killa. After reading both verses, I made the tiebreaking selection & I must say, this verse really had me captivated from beginning to end. So without further delay, this weeks VOTW goes to: Cereal_Killa. Congrats, man. Let's take a look:
"Symbolization"
by Cereal_Killa
A gangster knows the true meaning of life and death, hurt n release
As the attitudes from several ages saw women’s arousal in terms of disease
Please
Take your seat
..
He graces his fingers across my thighs, brushing my senses on fire
Light rays of frayed desire break to align as my flesh perspires
Nervous, nerves of steel to shield but with a will I wield on purpose
Strong, a battle field of love or lust.. Uncertainty feels so worthless
Hurting before insertion, but too young to know any better
He gropes in pleasure, wetter yet aware of the scarlet’s letter
He kisses me, I’m eased releasing in a sea of my endeavors
Measuring the man.. not his physic but by how he guarantees “forever”
Infinite promises of promised-land, dreams in which their fulfilled
A scenic scene of cosimc colours schemes that seem so real
Perfect placement with his urging tips as my fingers link to embrace it
Racing membranes, face to waist with his tongue untamed.. I taste it
Changing pace, a mild percussion, a slow bass with violins
A soft ballad of balance builds right as I’m hit by the choirs hymn
A violent spring of vibrant pinks that quiver from out my lips
The sound so fierce it pierces skin, deep beneath his hips
My lids are closed but my hearts exposed within the trust he clutches
Dominance rushes, my wrists are restrained before my cheeks stop blushing
Wait! I proclaim in vane yet he unbuckles his belt and starts thrusting
Crushing, blow for blow even though my vagina shrinks he keeps fronting
Face fucking me; sight glued to any all signs of the truth festering
That I am scared, that I feel weak, that I seem less deserving
I bite down, I bleed as I have screamed NO so many times its faded
Jaded, lying in a pool of secretions trying to survive its bathing
He unleashes
Baby, look I just don’t know what got into my
My pride internally whispers
I couldn’t have fought harder to protect my virginity
..
I’m destined to create or to be raped by the common man
A pure black rage or the elements needed for this land
My infection is a label.. stamped with frailty and delivered in spite
My name is Vesica Pisces and even as a “WOMAN” I live for Wuthering Heights..
I am often misrepresented by an archaic rapture for tortured minds
“The day I became a WOMAN” derives from mans shame.. in female pride
I am dignified past this label
As I,
I am LIFE
are you?
HIGHLIGHT VOTES:
by fenix orsiris
wow this was an emotionally powerful piece. it was compelling to read on, it had enjoyable diction and strong imagery. the flow was smooth, and i enjoyed the rhyme scheme through out, no complaints there - there seemed to be few multis, but many internals throughout with a good use of assonance. whether it was supposed to be a twist or i just didn't catch on, but i enjoyed the fact that i originally perceived the piece to be just about a sexual experience, then i thought the boyfriend or husband just went on longer and rougher than she hoped. and then it all came together and suddenly i felt great empathy for the character in this piece. great work. your writing reminds me of another writer i know, but i hadn't seen their writing in a while to match the styles to be able to guess whether you're the same person or not.
by Red glare
Nothing more gangster then pink mate. That reminds me of the Legend Of The Term Paper. Have you heard the story? A teacher asks her classroom of 40 or so students to define the word Courage. One student writes about standing up to a bully; getting beat down and getting back up again. Another student writes about a lioness; Her feminine strength inside the pack. But one student hands her a paper with just the word "Courage" on it. Courage indented at the top left corner of a loose leaf paper in Times New Roman font size 12. The teacher is appalled by this students audacity: Stamps A in a furious manner. He defines courage. Thats kinda what I think about while reading your verses; they are sonnets of sap. Difficult to trudge through, but once you do, wow - you are so fucking drenched in torment it's not funny. Man of color, A peacock of flamboyant behavior. If you are Black; this would be a tremendous testament, a compelling comparison to the struggle felt today in society. As it stands - I see pink and I am in the mood for vanilla ice cream. You are in a lane all your own. Color brought out your something.
by pohfig
wattup. im so happy to be off work I dont even care that I'm spending my 'spare time' voting. The verse was cool at the beginning. I have a problem with the middle there - your imagery wasn't up to par with what it shouldve been but i'll get to that, and also the ending was slightly sloppier then I think you're capable of - but we'll get there too. First I'd like to say that the beginning was FIRE. I dont mean the prologue I mean the
"Nervous, nerves of steel to shield but with a will I wield on purpose
Strong, a battle field of love or lust.. Uncertainty feels so worthless
Hurting before insertion, but too young to know any better
He gropes in pleasure, wetter yet aware of the scarlet’s letter
He kisses me, I’m eased releasing in a sea of my endeavors"
just the way that whole that segment rolls off the tongue is dope, and (in my experience) part of your signature style. Anyways - im gonna stop brooding on specifics so much -- Your wording was excellent up until the scene of the...forceful entry. I felt like you wanted to keep it vague but make it vulgar - and that to me is a contradiction in writing. I think the diction there shouldve been raw and powerful and fucked up. Either go for it and make me sick or..you know..dont touch on the subject - that's my two cents. The problem I had with the ending was that you tried to characterized the woman right before the ending. It's like I spent the whole time getting set up to feel for this woman, and I almost did (or i did and dont wanna admit it lol) and then its like MY NAME IS VENERIAL DISEASE and i was like WTF DUDE I DONT WANNA LIKE YOU NOW. that's how I felt...but I'm giving you a 50000FT view of how I felt because it seems to be easier. I mean in the end the closer was still dope but the way you wrapped it up wasnt fluid with the story build. It went from fun to intense to negatively intense and then a HUGE drop to psychoanalytical without a smooth transition. Iono thats where I'm at. Cool commentary. Cool verse, gay font color faggot. lol.
presents....
"The 2nd Coming"
[End of Season & Playoff Outlook]
***Week 9 Edition***
Putting in work once again, welcome to the week 9 edition of the AOWL magazine, the hottest mag on the net. We're only a few more weeks til the end of the season & the playoff race is looking hot. Competitors are jockeying position and there could be some epic match ups & daunting upsets in this final stretch. Who will be crowned the first ever regular season champ? Get ready for the biggest magazine of the YEAR. Holler.
http://youtu.be/c9mmBD_54M8
OPEN MIC FEATURE #1
"America.. The Land Of The Not So Free" (Ft. Aesthetic & nO GoOd!+)
written by Just Write
Desolate lands, turmoil, spastic catastophes
"Land Of The Free.. Love, Sex, Pain, and of Agony".
Nothing to gain confusing compassion w/apathy,
state tightens their reigns applying shackles to hands n feet.
Can it be real? Poison enters our digestive systems
A generation of chem trail and pesticide victims.
Exploits of micro-electroids stay coursing our blood,
how are we to stop a process that has already begun?
High strung Politicians with their volatile missions,
control the populace; a fraction in coffins or prisons.
Are we really sick, or is it government inflicted conditions?
Conspiracies to truths its all still pestilence driven.
Im sick of being lied too, 9/11 I despise you.
Gotta Ruby Ridge mindset too ride too.
Swine flu? How the fuck does the strain mutate?
im sick of being told too Contemplate Fuck that, I oughta meditate.
Either accept or disrupt this fucked F.e.m.a. mindstate.
Shit journalists cant investigate; they dissipate.
Implicate a higher stature; one with love minus the actor
Why the fuck would I support a nuclear reactor.
When nuclear testing got half Nevada wit cancer.
Where's the love, we getting fucked with compassion.
Osama bin ladin largest emotion manipulation.
Im tellin you; ignore stipulations.
wish these active elitists would say something n actually mean it
instead of promising action then passing us grievance
recite the mantra of heathens, that "do unto others"
the only land where a man will turn his back on a brother
we used to have compassion of mothers, now its void of its fathers
no trust in our sons, I see corruption in daughters
this is an ode to the land of the free.. home of the brave
the only nation where we sell our own souls for some praise
despicable slaves, you make me sick to my stomach
you're only free till you realize the grip of our government...
our nations on black out, running with broken lamps
and the only way to stop it is to get off our asses and make a stand.
I'm sick of the actions of government agencies,
cloaked in secret factions. Lies from a to z
its crazy, see people are deserving the truth,
I step aloof around the topic, like a bird on a roof..
the youth is diluted, so seek the truth if you choose it
this is real life son and my proof is in music..
Ive seen and experienced the worst of ways
people can suffer, as I've thrown the dirt in graves.
Listen, its a mission I'm on to see it through
and it affects everyone I talkin with, be it you.
I'm a soldier see, known to be cold as ice,
fuck the government, reach for your dreams...
and hold it tight..
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc1wxrLwtd1rpk8vu.png
BRING THAT BACK!!! (A Recap of Week 8's Match ups)
While there were many one-sided victories in week 8, we saw 3 very interesting match ups go down to the wire. So in this edition of 'Bring That Back!' we will take a closer look at those match ups & do a quick round robin of the others. Keep up with me.
Adonis (4-1) got back on the winning side of things with a pretty solid 7-1 win over Nigma (4-2), who for the first time in as many weeks, got involved in a match up that was decided by votes & not a no show. Pretty surprised at what Adonis was able to put together despite mentioning that the topic was pretty unfavorable. Readers felt he crafted a nice piece though & a few Nigma mishaps may been what hindered him from getting more votes. Adonis now has a 2-match lead in the White division & is competing in a #1 contenders match once again this week. Nigma remains in the lead in the purple division having the same record as myself & a tiebreaker edge because of the NS win over me as well.
fenix osiris (1-0) & Just Write (0-1) both made their debuts last week with fenix pulling off the knockout, 7-0. Just Write did completely the opposite of what his alias says- well, he BARELY wrote anything. Though many stated that they saw much potential from the little they read. With both joining so late in the season, they have a lot of work to do in order to get in the playoffs. Fenix is on the right track. A few more wins & he may just catch Red glare or even overtake Cereal_Killa for 2nd place in the Orange division. Just Write is in a tougher position, with Adonis, Vulgar, a fast improving Zenland & still a potential threat in Kuja (now known as Atheist) far ahead.
Cereal_Killa (2-1) came out with the pink to hand Witty (3-3) a 6-3 loss. If the color of carnation can get you a win, then I would just have to type every piece I do in pink from now on. No lie. But seriously, this battle was somewhat surprising. How so? This had BOTW potential but honestly fell pretty short. That's not to take anything from both pieces, but they both can come even better. So don't sleep. In the end, CK was able to draw the readers to his side with a very well written, deep story. And the story seemed to be where Witty didn't pack enough of a punch, though it is one of his better strengths. Witty remains in 2nd place in the Green division, which looks like Frank will take. His playoff hopes aren't dead, but he will need to put together a solid stretch to land a spot. Cereal_Killa is now only 3-matches behind Red in the Orange division. With a win & a loss by Red this week, that lead will cut down to 1.
Split (4-3) picked up a much needed victory last week over c.d.m. (2-6) with a smooth 6-2 win over the Mental Assassin. It has been that kind of year for c.d.m. even though he has put together some really great pieces of writing. This match, Split was far too superior and for the first time this season, I believe we witnessed Split at nearly the top of his game. While he got the majority of votes, some readers stated that his piece was a bit too "wordy" or "complex". But it didn't knock the amazing idea he was able to put together to get the victory. Split is currently 3rd place in the Red division, behind new AOWL champ, Zygote & high riser, IAmBenT, who has been on a tear. His playoff hopes are still very much alive. c.d.m. is in a more difficult situation, but still has a chance to make a late run. He is 3rd behind TopicalDood5 & division leader pohfig. If there is a writer who can still contest from far behind, Veritas is that writer.
TopicalDood5 (3-0) is starting to really pick up steam. I guess now we wonder how far can he go? He picked up a 7-0 knockout victory over the Zenmaster (4-4) & remains unbeatened. Despite the one-sided gap in votes, readers were highly impressed with Zen, and from the beginning of the season, he has steadily improved. Dood's verse was just more better, very well written, deep with strong schemes & word choice. Dood has quickly put himself in a good position to overtake pohfig in the Yellow division. A win this week will put him in first place & more than likely a #1 contenders match. Zenland is still in the thick of the playoff race. Despite being in 3rd in the White division, if he manages to pull off 3 wins, he will secure a guaranteed spot in the playoffs & with his skills improving every week, it shouldn't be difficult.
Aesthetic (0-3) returned to the topical scene only to lose once again to Objective (2-2), 6-3. Not many readers were impressed with the stories provided, but Objective managed to put together a much more solid piece to take the win. A more emotional piece with solid mechanics, OBJ topped the storytelling of Aesthetic, who had a great idea/concept, but poor word choice hindered him from taking this match up. His shot at making the playoffs will be difficult, especially with 3 very polished writers ahead of him in his division (Frank, Witty, ZeeDee). But he could play the role of underdog and pull off some upsets. Objective is second place in the Blue division, in which he & Mike Wrecka look to be the only active members barring more new writers joining the league. If Mike loses in this weeks championship match & Objective pulls off a win, he will only be .5-matches behind for the division lead.
Vulgar (2-0) managed to get past Ink (3-2), in a tight 7-4 victory which featured two of the best pieces written in week 8. Vulgar was able to get 4 straight votes to take a 4-1, lead, before break away in the end to hold on. It's very hard to go up against V but you have to like the valiant effort Ink brought to the table to make this match a good one. It was Vulgar's strong concept & top-notch word choice & imagery/detail that gave him the edge at the end which overcame a few mistakes from Ink. Ink, however, is in sole possession of first place in the Black division, ahead of dead man & TYSON (who returns to action this week) & Vinzr (3-2), who is one a hiatus & who knows when he will return. If things continue the way they are, Ink will solidify one of the top spots come playoff seeding. Vulgar is off to a hot start. He trails Adonis (4-1) in the White division by 2-matches. He will return back to action week 10.
All reigns eventually come to an end. This one nearly kept going though. Frank (6-1, 3x AOWL champion) finally suffered his first loss of the season, losing the championship match to zygote (6-1) in a very close rematch in which Frank won previously. The votes went back & forth for the majority of the time, but zy managed to get enough down the stretch to dethrone our 3x champion. This match featured two very good writers, both of whom are very consistent as well, which made this such a intriguing read. It really came down to preference & zygote, on this second time around, was able to put together a story that gave him that slight edge over Frank. Frank remains at the top of the Green division & is the Titanium Conference's current #1 seed. Don't be surprised if he manages to make his way back into a championship match. zygote is the Red division leader as well as the Platinum Conferences #1 seed.
So now, we will present to you our BOTW & VOTW. Congrats to all involved in the voting & to those who received this weeks nominations.
BATTLE OF THE WEEK
Red glare (5-2) over pohfig (4-2)
pohfig has done nothing but contend against some of the best writers in the league this season & each time it has been close. This time however, Red glare was able to get the last two votes & secure a much important victory. pohfig actually took a 5-3 lead late & one or two more would have got him the win, but in the last moments, Red got 4 votes in a row. The storytelling by both of these gentlemen was ridiculous. Not only that, but they both did very well mechanically while having strong imagery & word choice. No wonder this went back & forth. Let's revisit both of these amazing pieces.
POHFIG's VERSE:
"My reminiscence.
A cyclone of high hopes and tight-throated gasps -
Reigning my parade of restraints leaving the sights overcast.
Internal turmoil that leaves your sides broke and black -
forcing a physical spasm that would make a blind hostess mad.
A sigh - forced and drab - no ones as passive as you, pal.
Hesitant movements prove the gap between action and morale.
Your masking, with your laugh, how tedious it feels
to be someone that gained himself the measliest appeal.
Two sides of the brain and both believe that its surreal -
Your own mind can't remember when the evil was revealed.
A Dr. Jekyll proctor vessel to a frolicking beast
that's tangled in his own mess worse than Socrates' beard.
I always thought that for such a lovely river, the name is mystifying:
Cape Fear.
Spring Break. A crisp lake - or was it a river that we're on?
I can't differentiate because you opened the liquor back at dawn.
Whiskey - black - we're bombed just here to sit relaxed and gawk.
Floating in an inner tube - provoking chicks in rafts in thongs
to flash their titties at us some. You'd give'em flack or yawn
if they didn't have the gall - since when was your gift of gab that strong?
Yelling at drunk dudes like you know Kung Fu - while you move like a beast.
So tossed you think you could take on Sun Tzu and the Zhou Dynasty.
The dudes might just beat you quietly if you keep moving that mouth -
and why's your chest so puffed up when you usually slouch?
Cape Fear - where your fears are caped while you're boozing about.
Where the fork in the road causes misdirection if you're tuning it out.
When the only thing to fear on those enchanted summer nights was that the magic would end and real life would come crashing in." Cape Fear, 1991.
Back at bay - a scant escape - an ass to chase on the beach.
A body so tight your lungs close..with thighs that can make the release.
So much debauchery across the scene you'd be crazy to leave
but this is your last night here so act like you beat a major disease.
You can't fake the deceit - the alcohol muddles your judgement and sense
until your dressed in lies that tomorrows sun will undress.
When you return home you'll be replaying conversations under your breath
that you wish you could relive next summer recess.
Hunched and regressed back to the characterless life that you know -
where you runners high comes from having to sigh as you go.
You live a life in the open - confined to your hopes
and going nowhere slowly within a mind you've outgrown.
HIGHLIGHT VOTE- by Split.
Pohfig. initially thought you went overboard accentuating the tiredness/ hesitation. good structure, not wordy. interesting word choices all around. I like how the diction mirrors the idea that youre basically, chasing the desires of pastime in the present, but since you're older you dont realize you have outgrown them. i dont think theres some nuts metaphorical relationship between the lake and and the story. i didnt catch one at least, but you used the quote well.
strange contrast between first stanza and second. I tend to not like multi-sectioned verses because theyre so jumpy and feel more like theater than a story or a song. but ok.\
When you return home you'll be replaying conversations under your breath
that you wish you could relive next summer recess.
Hunched and regressed back to the characterless life that you know -
where you runners high comes from having to sigh as you go.
haha okay i see how you pulled it together here.
i guess, also, that the serenity of the river that seems to hold still is also like, usurped by the suspicion that it can kill swallow you whole. which is a dope connection to the subject matter which may have been intentional.
even if you dont deconstruct it that much, i loved how this was packaged.
RED GLARE's VERSE:
The weight of the world is almost featherless; for a seven year old - strown with benevolence.
A super imagination, he honed, all alone in his desolate catacomb of repressiveness.
The dark hole of eccentric bliss.
Where ideas light up - glow degenerate - zones of censorship,
Cold fluorescent mist.
The wandering thinkers' slow stroll through sentiments.
His 7 steps through the flashes of brilliance - bulbs from the genesis.
The beautiful home of intelligence - now under my control of the red abyss.
The frontal lobe. A funneled globe. Spun below rove of the mega ships.
Heaven sent roads from the cerebellum closed for connectedness.
Construction workers along the information highway - place orange cones in concession
Spikes thrown with deterrence.
The wheels turning; but the minds slow to detect the strips.
We are tired; worn out; run down; flat.
But we continue to roam directionless -
Unknown elements float into my domes nebulous.
Droves of pestilence latch on - rode through exodus.
My craft is departing - leaving behind ideas; Dust bowls of irrelevance.
The old testament of recklessness the stories of redemption; told by the treacherous
Get on the phone with the president.
Tell him the future is full blown in blemishes.
"Today America lightens the load;
The world as we know it is crashing in; we are moments from detriment.
A large abstract structure approaches earth - prone for prevalence.
A million light years traveling through our galaxy - a boulder of detritus.
You have less than an hour before comatose, in it's eminence.
Evacuate on my command" he states in his low baritone of emphasis.
"These scientist say an eroding edifice can be heard barreling towards us with bestowing resonance."
We are the tumor - the node of negligence.
The presidents voice could be heard now, bold and tremulous.
The Blank expression on the mans face shows no embellishment.
"God bless your soul; and may your spirit uphold the blessedness"
The ideas gathered; frozen in restlessness
In their humble abode; looking for leadership -
When the main idea rose from the residents.
"Who will be the Big Idea chosen to settle this?"
The thoughts looked around at each other - noble - but hesitant.
"The world needs us more than ever; now who'll be the last hope for Centaurus?"
A 7 year old Clark Kent; stood amongst the men lowly; depressed
His mother said;
"My son can save the world; he is the heir to the throne of Persepolis..."
A preadolescent figure came forward, shown no acceptance.
The world was seconds from it's first mode of progression.
"The human race is fucked as we know it - cloned for it's celibance."
The Ideas turned off the T.V. and threw the remote at the television.
The 7 year boy was left to grow up in his moment of excellence.
His chromosomal genetics defied the codes of kinetics.
The devastation hit earth - sending strobes as it's messages.
As it is told... Super-Man had flown like Pegasus.
Cape draped over his shoulder;
S - golden yellowish.
HIGHLIGHT VOTE- by Mike Wrecka
red glare - another sick verse. your multis and complex structure is really impressive. you bounced back from last weeks verse, which I thought was your weakest so far in this league. this one was back up to that elite level.
Where ideas light up - glow degenerate - zones of censorship,
Cold fluorescent mist.
The wandering thinkers' slow stroll through sentiments.
His 7 steps through the flashes of brilliance - bulbs from the genesis.
The beautiful home of intelligence - now under my control of the red abyss.
The frontal lobe. A funneled globe. Spun below rove of the mega ships.
Heaven sent roads from the cerebellum closed for connectedness.
pretty insane stuff right there. I was recently writing a verse using black abyss as a multi and its interesting to see the different words that can connect to red abyss. anyway. ya only criticism, cause for some reason I always point out the one thing I don't like, your work right here wasn't as accessible as some of your past work. and that's a big thing to me. as far as im concerned the average reader should be able to grasp it right away. not feel a bit perplexed by the verbiage. which im a bit embarrassed to say , I was at times in this verse. I had to read some parts twice and was like ahhh. but ya , the complexity of the structure and flow you used was leaps and bounds above most. and that impresses me. good work..
VERSE OF THE WEEK
Only one verse stood out from the rest & it came down to Adonis & Cereal_Killa. After reading both verses, I made the tiebreaking selection & I must say, this verse really had me captivated from beginning to end. So without further delay, this weeks VOTW goes to: Cereal_Killa. Congrats, man. Let's take a look:
"Symbolization"
by Cereal_Killa
A gangster knows the true meaning of life and death, hurt n release
As the attitudes from several ages saw women’s arousal in terms of disease
Please
Take your seat
..
He graces his fingers across my thighs, brushing my senses on fire
Light rays of frayed desire break to align as my flesh perspires
Nervous, nerves of steel to shield but with a will I wield on purpose
Strong, a battle field of love or lust.. Uncertainty feels so worthless
Hurting before insertion, but too young to know any better
He gropes in pleasure, wetter yet aware of the scarlet’s letter
He kisses me, I’m eased releasing in a sea of my endeavors
Measuring the man.. not his physic but by how he guarantees “forever”
Infinite promises of promised-land, dreams in which their fulfilled
A scenic scene of cosimc colours schemes that seem so real
Perfect placement with his urging tips as my fingers link to embrace it
Racing membranes, face to waist with his tongue untamed.. I taste it
Changing pace, a mild percussion, a slow bass with violins
A soft ballad of balance builds right as I’m hit by the choirs hymn
A violent spring of vibrant pinks that quiver from out my lips
The sound so fierce it pierces skin, deep beneath his hips
My lids are closed but my hearts exposed within the trust he clutches
Dominance rushes, my wrists are restrained before my cheeks stop blushing
Wait! I proclaim in vane yet he unbuckles his belt and starts thrusting
Crushing, blow for blow even though my vagina shrinks he keeps fronting
Face fucking me; sight glued to any all signs of the truth festering
That I am scared, that I feel weak, that I seem less deserving
I bite down, I bleed as I have screamed NO so many times its faded
Jaded, lying in a pool of secretions trying to survive its bathing
He unleashes
Baby, look I just don’t know what got into my
My pride internally whispers
I couldn’t have fought harder to protect my virginity
..
I’m destined to create or to be raped by the common man
A pure black rage or the elements needed for this land
My infection is a label.. stamped with frailty and delivered in spite
My name is Vesica Pisces and even as a “WOMAN” I live for Wuthering Heights..
I am often misrepresented by an archaic rapture for tortured minds
“The day I became a WOMAN” derives from mans shame.. in female pride
I am dignified past this label
As I,
I am LIFE
are you?
HIGHLIGHT VOTES:
by fenix orsiris
wow this was an emotionally powerful piece. it was compelling to read on, it had enjoyable diction and strong imagery. the flow was smooth, and i enjoyed the rhyme scheme through out, no complaints there - there seemed to be few multis, but many internals throughout with a good use of assonance. whether it was supposed to be a twist or i just didn't catch on, but i enjoyed the fact that i originally perceived the piece to be just about a sexual experience, then i thought the boyfriend or husband just went on longer and rougher than she hoped. and then it all came together and suddenly i felt great empathy for the character in this piece. great work. your writing reminds me of another writer i know, but i hadn't seen their writing in a while to match the styles to be able to guess whether you're the same person or not.
by Red glare
Nothing more gangster then pink mate. That reminds me of the Legend Of The Term Paper. Have you heard the story? A teacher asks her classroom of 40 or so students to define the word Courage. One student writes about standing up to a bully; getting beat down and getting back up again. Another student writes about a lioness; Her feminine strength inside the pack. But one student hands her a paper with just the word "Courage" on it. Courage indented at the top left corner of a loose leaf paper in Times New Roman font size 12. The teacher is appalled by this students audacity: Stamps A in a furious manner. He defines courage. Thats kinda what I think about while reading your verses; they are sonnets of sap. Difficult to trudge through, but once you do, wow - you are so fucking drenched in torment it's not funny. Man of color, A peacock of flamboyant behavior. If you are Black; this would be a tremendous testament, a compelling comparison to the struggle felt today in society. As it stands - I see pink and I am in the mood for vanilla ice cream. You are in a lane all your own. Color brought out your something.
by pohfig
wattup. im so happy to be off work I dont even care that I'm spending my 'spare time' voting. The verse was cool at the beginning. I have a problem with the middle there - your imagery wasn't up to par with what it shouldve been but i'll get to that, and also the ending was slightly sloppier then I think you're capable of - but we'll get there too. First I'd like to say that the beginning was FIRE. I dont mean the prologue I mean the
"Nervous, nerves of steel to shield but with a will I wield on purpose
Strong, a battle field of love or lust.. Uncertainty feels so worthless
Hurting before insertion, but too young to know any better
He gropes in pleasure, wetter yet aware of the scarlet’s letter
He kisses me, I’m eased releasing in a sea of my endeavors"
just the way that whole that segment rolls off the tongue is dope, and (in my experience) part of your signature style. Anyways - im gonna stop brooding on specifics so much -- Your wording was excellent up until the scene of the...forceful entry. I felt like you wanted to keep it vague but make it vulgar - and that to me is a contradiction in writing. I think the diction there shouldve been raw and powerful and fucked up. Either go for it and make me sick or..you know..dont touch on the subject - that's my two cents. The problem I had with the ending was that you tried to characterized the woman right before the ending. It's like I spent the whole time getting set up to feel for this woman, and I almost did (or i did and dont wanna admit it lol) and then its like MY NAME IS VENERIAL DISEASE and i was like WTF DUDE I DONT WANNA LIKE YOU NOW. that's how I felt...but I'm giving you a 50000FT view of how I felt because it seems to be easier. I mean in the end the closer was still dope but the way you wrapped it up wasnt fluid with the story build. It went from fun to intense to negatively intense and then a HUGE drop to psychoanalytical without a smooth transition. Iono thats where I'm at. Cool commentary. Cool verse, gay font color faggot. lol.