Week 3: Zenland (0-0) vs. cyph her (0-0) \\ Zenland wins 6-0

[Certain]

http://i.imgur.com/uAJesXX.png

Season 3



The Basics | Read the full rules here (http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=54688).

Verses are due Friday at 11:59 p.m. PT. THERE ARE NO EXTENSIONS.

Votes are due Sunday at 11:59 p.m. PT.

Verses may not exceed 48 lines or 650 words unless agreed upon by the opponent.

Voting on three battles is required. If you win and don't vote, you will receive a loss instead. If you lose and don't vote, you will receive a one-week suspension. Please post links to your three votes in this thread (http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=58003).

Topics this week are available for your choosing here (http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=58004).

Good luck, Zenland and cyph her.

[cyph her]

This is going to be a bit off-topic. My friend of 20 years just jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge and that’s really all I can think about so happy to take the L. Rematch with you when the tourney is over, k? You can choose the topic.

We always talk about it because it’s due life and who’s right?
I mean, I don’t know if I would have made a difference, but I’d choose to
And why would you jump into those rocks and let them bruise you?
A beautiful doctor, graduated from Berkeley and it noosed you?
I’m confused who wasn’t there? I was around, you could’ve called..
I would’ve told you what a great friend you were and at least saw you off
But instead I’m here with your friends and family and not a dry eye near
Instead I sigh and sneer, you left me in shambles but no crying here..
Your cries were left defying ears because you didn’t say anything!

That’s all I’ve got in me. Going to get drunk.

[Zen]

I won't drop my actual verse in here. It wouldn't seem right. Here's a key on losing the ability to talk.


Nouns are just sounds.
Verbs are new tricks found for nerds with loose lips
bound to the curb without the urge to do shit.
Action solves, but sadly we've evolved to give worth to the useless.
Even this text is nothing that we accept as something.
Why? Do you think there is depth in this? Funny.
This is empty. I've written this, but YOU make the meaning.
So you have the choice to take it or leave it.
I've left it to live out in the highlands about to begin my vow of silence.

[timeless]

Ok im gonna approach this "vote" as best as I can... Cyph, mad respect to you fr actually putting forth an effort while dealing with something as hard as what youre going through. I know exactly how you feel, ive had many friends fall victim to their own minds and let it go, close family too. Its rough. I feel weird trying to say anything about what you wrote, feel its unneccesary you know? But you captured your emotions up well abd spilled it down, that takes strength and lots of courage. Hope tomorrows a better day for you.

zen, also props on what you did here, you obviously couldve easily won and you chose not to. Good shit man. Your piece was cool, the last line was my favorite.

I dont want to cast a vote, tbh.

Vote - tie.

[zygote]

This short contest was great from both competitors. Cyp her had a good direct use of language but slacked a little in the mechanics of multiple rhyme etc. Not normally a problem, but it did not compare well against Zenlands advanced display. Good use of emotion but some repetitions of words like cry/crying/cries was not perhaps effective or particularly good at capturing the power of the emotions felt. Zenland's submission had a light quality, beginning with 'Nouns are just sounds.' but moving to a more philosophical part later on 'This is empty. I've written this, but YOU make the meaning.' - kind of a take on Vygotsky and theories where language meanings are shaped by the social/cultural experiences people attach to them. Would have made for a good starting point for an extended discussion, but it was a good display of Bushido code to keep it short. Voting for Zenland.

[Just Write]

Both of these little write ups were decent, obviously zen is more polished but I also know zen didnt go full force and cyph we all feel for ya. Stay up and join back into the league when you can.

Mvgt=zen

[Adonis]

Cy- like the idea didn't mind that you went off topic. But the Verse wasn't heavy in rhyMe nor compact emotion so I'm not the biggest fan of its work.

Zen- this was actually a really dope verse on many levels. Dispersed train of thought that had solid end rhymes start to end.

Vote Zenland

[YDK]

this was actually kinda cool with how short they both were.
Cyph i'm sorry ta hear your friend dyed sincerely I know too many ppl that committed suicide so I feel your pain. you really expressed a ton of emotion and honestly did convey the exact thoughts me and many other ppl have when somebody kills themselves so props on how well you displayed that with such a short verse. I wish I heard the whole story as to what else happened and more of what caused it but i'm sure you'd like to know more than I.
Zen tight lil piece here man not nearly as much emotion as cyph but you had the technical shit down ten times better. really this is a battle of emotion against writing skill itself and with a heavy heart I gotta vote for Zenland because this is a topical battle and I feel zen had more qualities involved other than emotion.
good battle guys

[e11even]

Cyph- keep your head high. Celebrate their life as you mourn. Talk to someone close if you have to. Stay strong. Your piece was very heartfelt. I felt the aNxiety, anger, and confusion you displayed in your words. I think if you pour your soul out in ink it could serve as good therapy. Hope to see you next week. Be safe.

Zen- Even when you hold back you display above average. I liked all but that last line. I hope you post full in the OM because I actually was anticipating the read. I hope you show next week.

In closing, if Cyph's mechanics matched emotion, they would have the W in my opinion. I'm a fan of feelings and emotional conveyance in pieces. But it, understandably, came up short. MVGT Zen.

[Mike Wrecka]

ok weak showing due to lack of effort by both parties here


cyph - short emotional story verse. the mechanics and rhyming were decent enough

zenland- you took a huge gamble posting that little keystyle. well you took this W but barely. good rhyming good mechanics good flow


vote - zenland