Certain
03-11-2014, 06:28 PM
http://i.imgur.com/uAJesXX.png
Season 3, Edition 3
Fully Regulated
INTRODUCTION by Certain
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6df0rha_Opw
Now we're off and running. Sure, our numbers have dwindled, but I think that could be a good thing. As I write this, all but one competitor has checked in for Week 3. (Where art thou, neutral?) Last week, we only had three no-shows and every non-shutout drew more than 10 votes. Moreover, the competition was fierce. After a lot of expected results in Week 1, there were a number of upsets in Week 2. The names of people to watch out for this season are starting to become evident. Hopefully this magazine will deliver on the successes of Week 2 and the potential of Week 3. In honor of story leads, every track listed here will be a great storytelling rap verse. We've also got my take on how to approach this week's topics, battle reviews, Just Write on no-show shine duty, oats handling power rankings and my previews. So let's dig right in.
WRITER'S BLOCK by Certain
Your humble moderator goes solo to give some tips on how to write to story lead topics.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRhSTOFCqDU
Way back before the term "topical" had even been coined, there were storytelling battles on these sites. This is going back to before I even joined up, back to the late 1990s when the entire text rap scene was in its infancy. And for these storytelling battles, the impetus was to put the writers in a specific situation and see what they could cook up with those writings.
As things evolved, storytelling became less straight-forward and more nuanced. The Slick Rick imitations gave way to a higher degree of complexity, though they never completely left and never should completely leave. Topics became more general and storytelling less of a requirement. Phrase topics were introduced, followed by pictures and quotes. But when I first joined the RSTL, which once stood for RapMusic.com Storytelling League instead of RapMusic.com Story and Topical League, there only were story lede topics. This was an era dominated by Jowelz's downhill raucus and Peril~Eyes' unfailing creative twists and lyricism.
I'm not one for regression, not in the sense of organizing a long-bar battle in 2014 or anything like that. But story leads were disappearing from the topical fore even when I was getting out of the game last time, in 2005 and 2006. And that's a shame because they provide a specific type of engagement and foster a specific type of creativity that vague phrases and quotes simply don't. So when I decided to run this season of the Art of Writing League, it was important to me to bring back the story lead.
But since most of you probably have little experience writing at a high level to these types of topics (or even to selecting your own topic rather than being assigned one for a battle), I figure a few hits could help people out. So here's some general advice that you can take or leave from someone who happened to be pretty successful on the story lead front in a past life.
Every voter knows the topics.
I cannot stress this enough: Don't spend an extended period of time setting up the scenario already laid out in the topic. That's wasted space that won't show your creativity. You have to move beyond the topic's confines to create your own characters and plots. Make this your own story, not the one I wrote out in the topic thread.
That also means your readers should come away with something more than the prerequisite of the topic when they think of your verse. Here's a chance to build some social commentary. Or it's a chance to use the topic as a starting point for a wild and creative plot full of twists. Or it's a chance to flesh out characters within a defined, unique context.
Mixing topics can be brilliant — or dangerous.
Back when the RSTL was all about story leads, starting with one topic and revealing a second at the end of your verse was a frequent trope. I did it myself plenty. It was a way to show your brain patterns and gain some points from voters for creativity, even though it was done so often that it really might not have been as creative as well all thought it was.
But it can backfire in all sorts of ways. Mostly, mixing topics usually requires at least some form of end-of-verse twist, and if you're trying to tell a straight-forward narrative while withholding key information, you risk losing readers. But there also is the aspect of defining your verse too much by the topics you were handed. If you combine two topics, you still need to make sure you're handling my first piece of advice and allowing the verse to be more than either or both of the topics.
Don't be afraid to step outside of the story formula.
The first verse ever to really open my eyes to what could be done in topical battling was one by Peril~Eyes in an RSTL title match against TaLi. He took the topic, "You are a Jew during the Holocaust," and flipped it into this atmospheric, deeply personal and emotional piece. And the entire time, he was foreshadowing a major twist at the end, that his character was a Jew masquerading as a Nazi and standing guard.
He developed this character spectacularly well, but he never actually told a story. A lot of people get locked in to the thinking that a story lead means they need to write like Slick Rick, stripping back all the things that make them unique writers and instead just going head-first into a plot. That's not a bad strategy, particularly if you could use a change of pace in your writing. But it's not the only one. Be open-minded in how you write to these topics, and be open-minded in your voting.
Come up with a world for your story.
This is true for any story, but it rings especially true when you're handed the beginning of your plot. As with all fiction writing, you have to frame your stories so that the characters' actions and reactions make sense. You can set the story in 2014, in the town you are from. But you still need to establish that world a little bit. This will be a deciding factor in some battles.
And with that said, taking your characters out of the contemporary world actually can yield great results, if you know how to do it. El Pancake, Lars and ZYG do this particularly well, establishing setting beyond the basics in order to tell more fleshed-out stories. If you're writing about a killer robot, perhaps a future setting makes more sense. If so, you'll need to establish what type of future we're living in for this verse.
In the same vein, you should consider the voice of your narrator. Maybe a 13-year-old about to take his first hit off a joint has a different style of diction than a Millennial who is part of a strange online dating story.
Don't be afraid to try something new.
This kind of runs counter to the third piece of advice. Writing to topics is meant to challenge us, and exploring new ground is a great way to better yourself in the long run. While I let these topics be open for you to choose, in the future (possibly for Week 7 and definitely by Week 11), story lead topics will be assigned to battles.
So I think this is a great time to try out something you might never have done otherwise. And remember, this is supposed to be fun.
Week 2 Rewind
BATTLE REVIEWS by Certain
Song lyrics week produced a ton of really outstanding verses, probably the highest quality week of competition I've seen on this site (excluding the second round of The Winter Topical, since that was a tournament). The battles were close and often excellent.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J5KB8vYOFw
1. Just Write beats El Pancake 9-1. | The Cure, "Disintegration"
BATTLE OF THE WEEK! Both of these assholes were complaining about the topic. Then they both came in and killed it. But, as Frank said in his vote, Just Write "elevated a tier with this one." That's the best way to put it. Just Write took on the Season 2 champion and came out swinging with a moving verse about friendship. He stayed true to his style, which many don't do when faced with tough opposition, and showed remarkable confidence. His verse was the best of the week, which is about the only reason El Pancake lost. El Pancake came in with a rich, heavy dystopian future verse that was told with excellence. The ending was a bit pat for something of his, as he normally prefers more unusual closure. But the verse displayed remarkable depth in its interpretation on predestination. I'm very much on the side of nature over nuture, so I connected with his verse despite the lack of character development. Ultimately the thing that hurt him was length; this was a story that could have been told well in 6,000 words instead of 600.
2. oats beats ZYG 5-0. | Aceyalone, "Keep It True"
Not many this week took advantage of my offer to give more feedback here on verses posted by Thursday, but I knew I could count on ZYG. The man is remarkably quick on the keys (and aided by his Australian time zone). He's also remarkably good with them, even despite his shutout loss. ZYG's strongest asset is his aproach to this game; he might be the best I've ever seen at deconstructing a topic, then piecing it back together to form something that fulfills that topic's potential. I really liked what he did this week, but my guess is part of the reason he lost is the voters' youth. None of us remember 1969, and most of us don't remember the Soviet Union. As a history buff, I appreciated what he did with the topic, but I think he needed to contextualize the traumatic feeling of a Soviet flag being stuck into the surface of the moon more to draw a stronger emotional reaction from the voters. One way to help this would have been providing a bit more fleshed-out characters, perhaps by writing a stanza on a failed mission instead of only giving us the successful one. oats hit all the right notes to beat ZYG. I don't know if he wrote with his opponent (or even opponent's verse) in mind, but his verse provided a deep social commentary on the race to be great while adhering to rigorous mechanical structure and clear wording. That combined with his more approachable content led to the easy win, but this battle was very good on both sides.
3. sacrifice beats Objective 6-5. | Common, "In My Own World (Check the Method)"
For the second week in a row, sacrifice has been a bit underrated by voters, in my opinion. His rhyme schemes are so deft and complex that perhaps they are flying over some heads, especially on quick reads. But the complexities of his verse, both in mechanics and content, are thrilling to read closely. Here he took on drug addiction and relapses in a very smart take on the topic. Objective took the more direct approach in every regard and churned out something that nearly took down the heavy favorite. That says a lot about how far Objective has come, though he always has been a strong storyteller when he keeps things tight. He does need to clean up his writing, as there were numerous subject-verb errors and other hitches, which is a big problem when your writing already lacks much flourish.
4. Vividlyvague beats Mike Wrecka 6-5. | Bruce Springsteen, "Adam Raised a Cain"
I don't think I've ever seen a voting swing quite like this one. Mike Wrecka had a 4-0 lead at one point, one vote away from a shutout victory. His verse on being a dead person in a coffin was creative and extremely polished. The reveal-based ending seemed to have caught readers' attention. Then Vividlyvague stole the momentum, reeling off four votes in a row after being down 5-1. He, too, had a reveal-style ending, and while some voters weren't thrilled about the incestual end, he wrote with enough emotion and deft rhyming to pull through in the end. I had to cast the final vote here, and whil ethis battle was not better than the three above it, it was by far the closest of the week in my mind.
5. Adonis beats Diode 9-7. | Neil Young, "On the Beach"
And the prize to weirdest topical battle I've seen in a while goes to this one. First Adonis comes in with a fucking diss verse. And the weird thing is, it's brilliant. Seriously, this is one of the best verses I've ever seen from Adonis, and the entire impetus is how much of a lame dude Diode is. These Internets breed this weird knowledge, and Adonis and Diode have known each other for about a decade, from what I've gathered. So there is Adonis, taking down this guy he's known for years and whose site he's run tournaments and leagues on for years, and he's doing it with all this specificity that is really funny. And then he combines it with this scattershot flow that really grew on me throughout the verse, and his word choice was tight. This is a one-off verse, which makes it kind of hard to comment on. But I think that flow, heavily grounded in a staccato rhythm, could be built on for the future. And I'd love to see more humor from everyone, though Adonis admittedly was a surprise candidate. Then Diode came in with an introspective verse that seemed a bit strange and almost like a counterpoint in the wake of reading Adonis' verse. I think Diode could have pulled this win out with a bit more creativity simply because it seemed a lot of people were underwhelmed by Adonis' approach. But I thought it was really fun. This can be fun, guys.
6. Pinot Grij beats fresh 5-0. | Royce da 5'9", "Death is Certain, Pt. 2 (It Hurts)"
In theory, I owe fresh some extensive feed. But he's banned for losing a pink-slip match to Diode, so I'll say this: He was blown out of the water largely because the first half of his verse was nonsense. He needed to pull back quite a bit on the vocabulary, as he alienated his readers instead of drawing them in. And fresh was blown out of the water because Pinot Grij is that kind of writer. I said last week that Pinot Grij is the best storyteller on this site (though he might not have the best stories consistently), and I'm sticking by that after his showing here. His wording was pitch-perfect the entire way despite a bevy of rhymes. He's a force, and if he sticks around for long enough, he can take the title.
7. timeless beat TYSON 6-0. | Nas, "What Goes Around"
After last week's conceptual brilliance, timeless took a step back this week. He went for a rather direct attack on the meaning of life, which can work in the right hands. Had dead man handled this topic in the same way, for instance, the results probably would have been brilliant. But to pull no punches, timeless' writing probably is not at the level of complexity required to assertively handle such a direct approach against a better opponent. It's not one specific area as much as everything that needs to be developed, which isn't an insult at all. timeless is adequate in every field, but he could use a bit higher complexity as a rhymer and in his diction, and that comes only with practice and reading. TYSON had a verse with an interesting story line that was made difficult to follow because of his clouded diction. He wrote about a child obsessed with sex among adults, which seems appropriate for the noted board molester. But it couldn't beat timeless' more coherent effort.
8. patrown beats Cereal_Killa 5-0. | Eyedea & Abilities, "Man vs. Ape"
This was a strange battle featuring two centered verses. patrown clearly dug deep for his verse and had a lot of interesting thoughts conveyed on what all we're doing here and the value of truth in a world that seems starved of it. But he has in the past struggled to unify someof his denser verses, and I thought that issue came across here quite a bit. He introduced two characters mid-verse, gave us a few lines about each, then ditched them to return to the abstract. He never tied his laces, so to speak. But he brought together a strong enough ending to leave the reader satisfied that the verse had a purpose, even if that purpose could have been made more explicit. The rhymes were sloppy at times and excellent at others, but that probably comes from the grandiose concept he was attempting. Mostly, though, he won so easily because voters couldn't get into Cereal_Killa's verse. For one, it wasn't a complete story, but even that story itself was elusive and difficult to follow. So yes, this was a strange battle.
9. Frank wins via Clockwerk quasi-no-show. | Jay Z, "Blueprint 2"
One of Frank's favorite things is to imbue a quote topic with wordplay, so here, he turned "defeat" into "the feet" and wrote about waiting in line for a new pair of Jordan sneakers. That was a creative twist on the topic for a 12-line verse. He never made any headway into where things were going, but he did more than Clockwerk, who posted numbers to get a no-show victory in case Frank failed to post in time. Frank almost always posts on time, though, and when I warned Clockwerk of this, he said he simply didn't have any time this week. Hopefully he'll be back.
10. Vulgar wins via H4ZE no-show. | Bob Dylan, "Absolutely Sweet Marie"
You knew Vulgar was behind this verse from the opening line, which simply read "3,000 B.C." That was a bit misleading, it turns out, as the story was set closer to 300 B.C., in the era of the Damara. (Admittedly, there were plenty of mixed references here, but I only learned that because I looked some stuff up, as I alwasy do while reading Vulgar verses.) The story was basic but creative: The feudal landlords of the era (whichever it was) were trying to one up all established order and force people to pay exceedingly high taxes or risk losing their land. They had as their claim to power a fine print of sorts claiming that the villagers had signed away their rights. As a result, the people revolted. It was a creative take on the idea of honest among outlaws, though it admittedly was a bit distancing because of the lack of defined characters. H4ZE ended up not being able to make it because of offline commitments.
11. neutral wins via maths debate no-show. | Ras Kass, "Reelishymn"
Though we still don't know who neutral is, the obvious conclusion from reading his first two verses is that he's talented and British. Everything about his two verses dropped thus far suggests both of those things. This week he took on a topic about exploitation in a very direct manner, after alienating some with his abstractions last week. He described a selfish king in one stanza, then had a really long line through the middle of his post before writing about a farmer who works hard for so little in the next. The lack of a link between the stanzas was probably the biggest problem the verse had; they never felt unified, even at the end. There was some clunky word choice, paritcularly in the first stanza, where on several instances he chose to not rhyme the last syllable of each line and instead build his multiple-syllable rhymes off the penultimate syllables. There also were a few instances of strange usage, such as "piece the delicious fish" as a way of describing dividing a meal. But the deft rhyme schemes were evident, and the verse was another example of why neutral could be a threat if he sticks around. maths debate popped in Thursday to say he couldn't make it, and I'm not sure if he realized verses were due the next day.
12. Ink wins via Greed no-show. | The Who, "Behind Blue Eyes"
After talking a little trash last week at this week's opponent, Ink ended up not having much time this week apparently. His verse was fine but definitely not as polished as his effort against YDK. He took the "bad guy" quote in a logical but creative route, writing about the wide-eyed new boss at a toy store who eventually stops being so nice to his employees as he tires of their competence. The concept was good, and the writing was clean and smooth. But the narrative fell a bit flat because of the lack of a singular guiding set of reference points. Ink never completely involved the reader in the story because he never set the scene up properly and he jumped time twice, accentuating that issue. Still, this was a good display and probably would have beaten Greed, who didn't show and then complained about their not being extensions even though he hadn't even asked for one.
13. dyedinthewool wins via dull boy no-show. | Nirvana, "Drain You"
dyedinthewool got through 12 rather interesting lines but said she couldn't finish her verse. Her take on the topic was spot-on, writing from the perspective of Marie Antoinette to tackle a wonderfully narcissistic quote from Kurt Cobain. She showed good writing fundamentals yet again, but this time had the concept down pat, too. Now all she needs to do is come up with the time in her busy schedule to write a complete verse. Still, I enjoyed this submission, though I have to admit that I'm not entirely sure where it was going. dull boy no-showed again after again seeming like he might show.
14. YDK wins via WZA no-show. | The Beatles, "Yesterday"
So WZA has not logged into his account here since dropping his Week 1 verse back Feb. 24. It suffices to say he no-showed. YDK intially seemed conflicted on whether or not to drop a verse, but I think we all should be writing regardless of wins or losses. This isn't a battle league, where good punchlines can be saved. If you're writing on topic, that verse should not be reusable at a later date in most cases. Anyway, YDK dropped a relatively short, rhyme-heavy personal verse about everything he's overcome. YDK definitely has had an interesting life, but I think he would be well-advised to consider broadening his scope more often or even coming up with more creative ways to deliver his own stories. The rhymes here were forced, but that happens often in quickly written verses.
15. Innovator wins via Totoro no-show. | The Clash, "The Call Up"
I was hoping Totoro would go this season without a no-show. Alas, it's Week 2. Innovator was worried about not having time to show as well but did carve out enough to write a very abstract verse on the subject of life and death. The verse was very unbalanced, but there were some flashes that showed that if he took his time and polished it, there was something there. It just seemed like it might have been written by phone and very hastily read over, if at all. There were a bunch of mistakes, and a lot of the thoughts and rhymes never connected. I know Innovator is capable of much better than this, but I'm glad he showed. I think he has the shell of something he could develop further, if he chooses.
16. King Ra. wins via Exoduzt no-show. | Led Zeppelin, "No Quarter"
Knowing his opponent would not show, King Ra. posted a short little ode to the topic itself, discussing what he might have done had he written a story. He may have done so, actually, but he didn't show it to us. Exoduzt no-showed, then complained about not getting feedback in Open Mic.
NO-SHOW SHINE by Just Write
Since he votes on every battle, Just Write decided to step up and give some feedback on the completed verses he couldn't vote on.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwVLMJrwKyM
Welcome gentlemen, and dyedinthewool. It was another week of absolutely amazing talent and a pretty good turn out. I believe I read Certain say that we had only 7 people no show out of 32 which is a pretty great for only being week two of the AWOL. Hopefully everybody stays involved throughout this league and we can make this the best season yet. Ok so this section is dedicated to those who put time and effort into a piece only to have been no showed by some asshole who was either too intimidated to write against these people or just plain lazy. I mean come on, these really isn't an excuse to not write when you have five days. I will not be including people who tried to crunch out a win by pussily submitting a few lines of bullshit a couple minutes prior to deadline, you people suck. For the people no-showed, I strongly suggest they post their pieces in the OM, for those of you who have i will include a link to your piece and the rest of you should go feed these guys for their hard work. I purposely haven't read anyone's piece who was no showed yet, so without boring you any longer and in no particular order lets jump into this
Innovator | "He who will die is he who will kill." — Joe Strummer
This was a pretty deep piece to me, i actually enjoyed it quite a bit. Sometimes when im reading pieces that are not just straight to the point i find myself getting bored and just trying to rush through it and then end up having to reread it again to find its meaning. This was not the case with this piece such as pieces from zygote, vulgar ect. And that not a diss to them but it's a compliment to innovator. I think as a writer it's your job to make something beautiful, yet still understandable to the reader/voter. Perfect example was Ck's piece this week. A fucking beautiful piece yet i didn't know what the hell he was talking about. Innovator kept a classy while still simple if that makes sense. My only gripe is maybe he tried to do TOO MUCH in some area's as far as multi's i believe some words were thrown in just for rhyme sake which is fine, we all do it but sometimes too much makes the flow imo seem a little choppy and that's what i noticed in a few spots here. Overall good read though
Ink | "No one knows what it's like to be the bad guy." — Pete Townshend
Lol, so this was a really cool story, with the third verse being the most entertaining. My only thing is i didn't like the word fisticuffs (though i know its a netcee thing and brings personality to the piece) i just feel it was odd in this piece. But it was also probably thrown in there to get a smile out of the reader which it did so bravo i guess. And the chris brown line also seemed out of place but made me laugh as well. I dug your take on this topic and have been there myself. I remember when i was younger and I got promoted and treat all my employees like just friends, smoked with them on lunch breaks ect. Big mistake, after awhile they lose all respect for you than you have to turn into an asshole (the bad guy) before you can get any work out of them. Really great job on this one ink, flow was butter, mechanics on point. Didn't really like the one month later, three months later bit but i also see why it was necessary. better than last week as far as tackling the topic imo. Shame it was no showed
neutral | "Exploitation is the world's oldest occupation" — Ras Kass
Natural, neutral.. one of you need to change your name cuz that shits fucking confusing am I right? You know where you fucked up, posting your verse so early, you literally scared the shit out of maths debate til he just quit... 2 days prior to deadline lmao. Nah but for real this piece was NICE. Now one question, who are you? Obv alias. Split perhaps? I noticed he just disappeared all weird and gay like. I miss millhouse. Anyways yea i really dug this piece, it was very very mechanically sound and definitely made me want to read more from you so props. There were a few instances where you kind of made hypocritical statements (maybe hypocritical isn't the right word) but for example first you say fuck god, then a few lines later you're praying to him but that's just nitpicking to the extreme. This was probably my favorite out of the no shows I've read so far. Stay in the league man. I'm excited to see you write some more
Vulgar | "To live outside the law, you must be honest." — Bob Dylan
Man i don't want to even read your piece, we all already know it was some groundbreaking philosophical piece that would have ethered haze out of existence.. no but for real. Nice fuckin piece man, there really isn't anything negative i can say about this piece so i was planning on quoting some lines i thought were fire and when i was trying to copy and paste i just kept extending lines till i copied the whole fucking piece so that should just tell you how great this piece was. Your obviously a talented dude with a vast knowledge of many subjects. Yea this is turning into like a "praise vulgar" paragraph now so Im going to just stop... now.
YDK | "I'm not half the man I use to be." — Paul McCartney
Damn man, the last couple weeks you've really came alive. I enjoyed this piece so much because i can relate to a lot of it as i'm sure many others can too. It just had a very sincere feel to it. Like a pouring out of the heart.. we all try to add emotion to our pieces but its rare that real emotion is felt and thats exactly what i felt throughout this piece. It was short but very effective and I commend you for that. Props my man, looking forward to seeing what you have this week
Ok everybody thanks for tuning into my little corner of the mag. It's my first time doing this so if it wasn't up to par my bad. No fuck that i did this all from my phone so give me my god damned props faggots haha jk, no but seriously. And i want to tell certain props as well for doing this shit every week without even participating. Appreciate the dedication bro. Til next time people. Im out.
Week 3 Preview
POWER RANKINGS by oats
One of our most noted contributors tackles the task of ranking the best in this league in an arbitrary order and probably does a better job than your humble moderator.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zEcbSYjDZ8
Oats here, coming at you with this week’s power rankings. As a preface, I used a number of different data points to lead me to an otherwise arbitrary hierarchy. I used last week’s rankings as the starting point, as well as record, verse quality, strength of competition, and cumulative vote differential. In the case of no-show wins, quality of verse supplanted competition and differential. I also excluded people who signed out, as well as myself, since it’s a conflict of interest. SHIT IS REAL PROFESSIONAL ROUND HERE.
10. Pinot Grij (1-0)
Last Week: Not ranked, beat unranked Fresh 6-0
Vote Differential: 6-0
Pinot is an interesting writer. He has flashes of top-tier showings, but I’ve never seen him stick around enough to make any serious dents. If he does show up consistently, there’s no doubt in my mind that he will be a contender. Shutting out Fresh was a good start, but this week he will have to step-up to the always game Mike Wrecka.
9. ZYG (1-1)
Last Week: Ranked third, lost to No. 9 oats 5-0
Vote Differential: 8-7
Zyg’s momentum was halted last week by the oatmeal buzz saw, but he still remains a force to be reckoned with. As a former champ and widely revered topicalist, Zyg is expected to rebound back into contention sooner than later. Whether or not he will place himself back into the top 5 will be greatly influenced by his performance this week against newcomer Neutral.
8. Timeless (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked 10th, beat unranked Tyson 5-0
Vote Differential: 11-0
Timeless is in a class of his own, as the only person who has had two matches go to votes without dropping a single one. While impressive, he’s done so against lesser competition, both of whom he was expected to steamroll. He’s steadily carving a name out for himself, and a win against oats would be a big statement of his arrival.
7. Ink (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked eighth, won via no-show by unranked Greed
Vote Differential: 9-8
Ink squeaked by a tough YDK in week one, but got a breather last week when Greed no-showed. He still dropped a strong verse that proves he has a conceptual potency to his writing. He will need to bring his A-game in all areas to remain undefeated, as a bout with heavyweight Frank looms.
6. Patrown (2-0)
Last Week: Not ranked, beat unranked Cereal_Killa 6-0
Vote Differential: 6-0
Patrown got his chance to flex his ability last week, besting the tough journeyman Ceral Killa. Patrown has been around for a while, though has yet to make a splash in the topical pools here on NC. With an upcoming match against the streaking Just Write on the horizon, Patrown will have an opportunity to raise his stock and slide into a contender match with a W.
5. Adonis (2-0)
Last Week: Not ranked, beat No. 7 Diode 9-7
Vote Differential: 9-7
Underdog Adonis surprised a lot of people with his win over highly-touted Diode last week. The surprise wasn’t him winning, but rather how he won, with a pseudo-diss verse against his opponent that tied into the given topic. This outside-of-the-box thinking should serve him well in his upcoming match with Vulgar, a battle that provides yet another opportunity for Adonis to turn some heads if he wins.
4. Vividlyvague (1-1)
Last Week: Ranked seventh, beat unranked Mike Wrecka 6-5 but was one vote shy of the requirement
Vote Differential: 6-5
Vivid escaped Mike Wrecka last week in the closest match of the week, rallying from a 4-0 deficit. Vivid made a name for himself last year, and is looking to build upon that and become a legit contender. He faces another stern test this week, with the formidable King Ra standing in his way from a spot in a contender match.
3. Just Write (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked fifth, beat No. 1 El Pancake 9-1
Vote Differential: 15-1
No one seems to work as hard as Just Write. Not only is he voting on every battle, he’s absorbing any and every piece of advice he can get his hands on. Last week he impressed with a flattening of top-ranked Pancake, an upset that surprised most. This week will be an interesting test, as he swaps roles and becomes the favorite against dark-horse Patrown.
2. Vulgar (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked fourth, win via no-show by unranked H4ZE
Vote Differential: 5-0
Vulgar is a perennial heavyweight in the topical community, regarded for his imaginative imagery and creative concepts. One of the early favorites to champ the league, Vulgar will have to get through the unorthodox Adonis to cash in on that expectation. While still the favorite this week, Adonis is a definite step-up in competition from weeks 1 and 2.
1. Frank (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked second, win via quasi-no-show by unranked Clockwerk
Vote Differential: 11-1
There isn’t much to say about Frank that isn’t already archived somewhere. He’s somewhat of a controversial figure for his antics on the board, but he is still undeniably dope. After thrashing topical legend Sacrifice in the first round, he faced no resistance in week 2 as his opponent posted a no-show verse. After a disappointing loss in last season’s finals and an early exit in the Winter Tourney, Frank looks to be in championship form again.
Notable Newcomers
Witty: In my mind, Witty is perpetually underrated. He has a poetic touch of language and top-tier rhyme schemes, with the ability to bend topics into engaging stories and clever metaphors. He’s proven that on any given day he can beat anyone, but he still needs to prove his consistency. Starting off with a week 1 no-show didn’t help his case, but should he stick around, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him crash into the top 5.
Rawn MD: For all the guff he gets for being a ridiculous persona and all but proven pathological liar, Rawn is actually a good writer. He excels with rhyme schemes and fluid rhythms, and when a topic suits his preferences he can do a good impersonation of an elite writer. He’s still unproven in the topical arena, as he is prone to criminal deviances, alien abductions, Ivy League lectures, and vehicular kidnappings. In the event that the world takes it easy on him for a week, he has the potential to surprise people.
PREDICTIONS by Certain
Without knowing who would pick which topic, these predictions were more difficult than normal. Without big baby to help, these predictions are less funny than last week. Deal with it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5efvUqH5Oo
Frank (2-0) vs. Ink (2-0)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! These are two storytellers in that traditional sense. They both have shown they like to approach even open-ended topics with story bents, so they should be natural fits for the more defined and linear nature of this week's topics. Still, I tend to give the advantage to Frank just about all the time, and I think Ink is going to have to tighten his mechanics considerably here to win this battle. Frank is very creative, but Ink still can win the originality battle if he comes up with the right blend of hitting the topic while bringing something new to it. But can he outwrite Frank? Prediction: Frank 60-40.
Vulgar (2-0) vs. Adonis (2-0)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! This should be the most esoteric battle of the week, at the least. It'd be really weird if these two both came with concrete stories set in the real world without any overarching aspirations, and it'd be a bit disappointing at the same time. So the question is, does Adonis have what it takes to beat Vulgar? Yes, to be blunt. But that doesn't mean he will. Vulgar has been on point lately, showing a consistency through The Winter Topical and the first two weeks of this season that he lacked last season. And letting him pick his own poison will make it very difficult for Adonis, who otherwise might have benefited from a topic that played into his hands. This might be the first Season 2 rematch, and their Week 1 match was close, though Vulgar prevailed. Prediction: Vulgar 62-38.
oats (2-0) vs. timeless (2-0)
One of the things I've always liked, even when on the wrong end, about topical battling is that the best writer does not win every time. So yes, timeless does have a shot to advance to 3-0 even as he faces off with perhaps the most polished writer in this league. That hope comes in the fact that oats has not shown the same grip on straight-forward storytelling as he holds on topical writing. timeless needs to deliver a pitch-perfect approach to whichever topic he chooses, though, because oats is very reliable. I anticipate oats will find some way to write about the beach. Prediction: oats 69-31.
Just Write (2-0) vs. patrown (2-0)
How many times have I used the word "grounded" so far? Well, patrown might succeed this week because the story leads will ground him a bit and tie down his tendencies to go way too big, unless he decides to go against my warning anyway. Just Write is on a hot streak and writing the best material I've seen from him, forming his own voice and place among the better writers on this site in the process. But Just Write thrives in part because his opponents don't connect the same way he does, with the audience or with the topic. patrown needs to nullify that. Prediction: Just Write 56-44.
Pinot Grij (1-0) vs. Mike Wrecka (1-1)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! These two staged a pretty memorable battle once already, way back in the Writing Challenge League last fall. Mike Wrecka won that with one of the best verses I've read from him, a ridiculous and ridiculously creative take on ventriloquism that earned my vote. Can he duplicate it? He again will need to come up with the better, more creative story here because he doesn't have the mechanical prowess Pinot Grij shows in every verse. But you cannot count out Mike Wrecka, as he has shown plenty of times on this site. He's a rock. Pinot Grij is one of those guys who gets favored against just about anyone, and Mike Wrecka is one of those guys who can beat any favorite. Predictions: Pinot Grij 52-48.
Vividlyvague (1-1) vs. King Ra. (1-1)
Vividlyvague is coming off a big win (which he hasn't received credit for yet, hence the record) against Mike Wrecka, while King Ra. has a loss to Vulgar and a no-show win. But this is a rather evenly matched battle. King Ra. has an edge in experience and consistent fundamentals, while Vividlyvague's bombastic storytelling has tightened up this season, and he's improved his mechanics a bit. That takes a lot of the advantages away from King Ra., but we all know what he can do when he puts his mind to it. Vividlyvague is the hot hand, though, so I've got to favor him. Prediction: Vividlyvague 55-45.
neutral (1-1) vs. ZYG (1-1)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! The foreigns! I don't know that neutral is a foreigner, but he writes like it. ZYG is from another planet, so that qualifies. His verse already is up, but I haven't read it. I would be surprised if neutral didn't, though I always advise people against peeking at opponents' verses before writing themselves. Story leads really fit ZYG's style, and I think he would have been my preseason pick to win it all in a league with only story leads. But he might be at a slight disadvantage in a scenario in which everyone can choose their own topics because he loses some of that creativity edge. neutral has shown adept at mechanics but hasn't interested me with his content yet. Will that change when he can pick his fate? Prediction: ZYG 59-41.
Zenland (0-0) vs. cyph her (0-0)
I have absolutely no clue what will happen here. Zenland has been known to submit swag and flow verses for topical battles. He's been known to write in paragraph format despite knowing voters generally dislike it. cyph her, to the best of my knowledge, has dropped one verse on this site, in the Diss The Emcee Above You cypher. It was a bit rough mechanically, but I don't want to hold that brief contribution against her. Still, Zenland is the known commodity, and he can write very well when he wants. Prediction: Zenland 64-36.
Witty (0-1) vs. Rawn MD (0-1)
I refuse to acknowledge this battle until they both show.
dyedinthewool (0-2) vs. Innovator (0-2)
Both of these 0-2 records could be 1-1 if they do the extra voting allotted, so don't look at this battle just as a pair of bad records. dyedinthewool has impressed me a lot with her wording and rhyme schemes, but she also has failed to carve out enough time to commit to a verse and content in the first two weeks. Innovator also says time is an issue, and he has long been one of the most up and down competitors around. This battle is exceptionally difficult to pick, but I'm going to favor the person whose submissions have impressed me more this season, based on quality rather than quantity. Prediction: dyedinthewool 51-49.
YDK (0-2) vs. Objective (0-2)
Like dyedinthewool and Innovator, YDK turn one of his losses to a win if he does some extra voting this week. But Objective simply has been on the wrong end of a pair of tough battles, against Just Write and sacrifice. These are two very different writers, with YDK showing more polish while Objective has a more active imagination. I tend to think this set of topics should be an advantage to the natural storytellers, but then you also get someone like YDK, who has shown he can tell a story when he's forced but too often avoids it against his own good. Here he can pull away from his own internalized thoughts and give us a structured story, and if he does that, he can win. Objective might be too creative for him, though. Prediction: Objective 52-48.
Until We Meet Again
CONCLUSION by Certain
I hope you all enjoyed this edition of the Art of Writing League's weekly periodical. Thanks to Just Write and oats for contributions. big baby and mustachio are honeymooning in Lake Minnetonka right now, and who knows when they'll be back. I'm always looking for help, particularly with giving no-show verses their due respect, so if you'd like to give some feedback, let me know. Thanks, and let's have another great week.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3Sd2gDkSV8
Season 3, Edition 3
Fully Regulated
INTRODUCTION by Certain
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6df0rha_Opw
Now we're off and running. Sure, our numbers have dwindled, but I think that could be a good thing. As I write this, all but one competitor has checked in for Week 3. (Where art thou, neutral?) Last week, we only had three no-shows and every non-shutout drew more than 10 votes. Moreover, the competition was fierce. After a lot of expected results in Week 1, there were a number of upsets in Week 2. The names of people to watch out for this season are starting to become evident. Hopefully this magazine will deliver on the successes of Week 2 and the potential of Week 3. In honor of story leads, every track listed here will be a great storytelling rap verse. We've also got my take on how to approach this week's topics, battle reviews, Just Write on no-show shine duty, oats handling power rankings and my previews. So let's dig right in.
WRITER'S BLOCK by Certain
Your humble moderator goes solo to give some tips on how to write to story lead topics.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRhSTOFCqDU
Way back before the term "topical" had even been coined, there were storytelling battles on these sites. This is going back to before I even joined up, back to the late 1990s when the entire text rap scene was in its infancy. And for these storytelling battles, the impetus was to put the writers in a specific situation and see what they could cook up with those writings.
As things evolved, storytelling became less straight-forward and more nuanced. The Slick Rick imitations gave way to a higher degree of complexity, though they never completely left and never should completely leave. Topics became more general and storytelling less of a requirement. Phrase topics were introduced, followed by pictures and quotes. But when I first joined the RSTL, which once stood for RapMusic.com Storytelling League instead of RapMusic.com Story and Topical League, there only were story lede topics. This was an era dominated by Jowelz's downhill raucus and Peril~Eyes' unfailing creative twists and lyricism.
I'm not one for regression, not in the sense of organizing a long-bar battle in 2014 or anything like that. But story leads were disappearing from the topical fore even when I was getting out of the game last time, in 2005 and 2006. And that's a shame because they provide a specific type of engagement and foster a specific type of creativity that vague phrases and quotes simply don't. So when I decided to run this season of the Art of Writing League, it was important to me to bring back the story lead.
But since most of you probably have little experience writing at a high level to these types of topics (or even to selecting your own topic rather than being assigned one for a battle), I figure a few hits could help people out. So here's some general advice that you can take or leave from someone who happened to be pretty successful on the story lead front in a past life.
Every voter knows the topics.
I cannot stress this enough: Don't spend an extended period of time setting up the scenario already laid out in the topic. That's wasted space that won't show your creativity. You have to move beyond the topic's confines to create your own characters and plots. Make this your own story, not the one I wrote out in the topic thread.
That also means your readers should come away with something more than the prerequisite of the topic when they think of your verse. Here's a chance to build some social commentary. Or it's a chance to use the topic as a starting point for a wild and creative plot full of twists. Or it's a chance to flesh out characters within a defined, unique context.
Mixing topics can be brilliant — or dangerous.
Back when the RSTL was all about story leads, starting with one topic and revealing a second at the end of your verse was a frequent trope. I did it myself plenty. It was a way to show your brain patterns and gain some points from voters for creativity, even though it was done so often that it really might not have been as creative as well all thought it was.
But it can backfire in all sorts of ways. Mostly, mixing topics usually requires at least some form of end-of-verse twist, and if you're trying to tell a straight-forward narrative while withholding key information, you risk losing readers. But there also is the aspect of defining your verse too much by the topics you were handed. If you combine two topics, you still need to make sure you're handling my first piece of advice and allowing the verse to be more than either or both of the topics.
Don't be afraid to step outside of the story formula.
The first verse ever to really open my eyes to what could be done in topical battling was one by Peril~Eyes in an RSTL title match against TaLi. He took the topic, "You are a Jew during the Holocaust," and flipped it into this atmospheric, deeply personal and emotional piece. And the entire time, he was foreshadowing a major twist at the end, that his character was a Jew masquerading as a Nazi and standing guard.
He developed this character spectacularly well, but he never actually told a story. A lot of people get locked in to the thinking that a story lead means they need to write like Slick Rick, stripping back all the things that make them unique writers and instead just going head-first into a plot. That's not a bad strategy, particularly if you could use a change of pace in your writing. But it's not the only one. Be open-minded in how you write to these topics, and be open-minded in your voting.
Come up with a world for your story.
This is true for any story, but it rings especially true when you're handed the beginning of your plot. As with all fiction writing, you have to frame your stories so that the characters' actions and reactions make sense. You can set the story in 2014, in the town you are from. But you still need to establish that world a little bit. This will be a deciding factor in some battles.
And with that said, taking your characters out of the contemporary world actually can yield great results, if you know how to do it. El Pancake, Lars and ZYG do this particularly well, establishing setting beyond the basics in order to tell more fleshed-out stories. If you're writing about a killer robot, perhaps a future setting makes more sense. If so, you'll need to establish what type of future we're living in for this verse.
In the same vein, you should consider the voice of your narrator. Maybe a 13-year-old about to take his first hit off a joint has a different style of diction than a Millennial who is part of a strange online dating story.
Don't be afraid to try something new.
This kind of runs counter to the third piece of advice. Writing to topics is meant to challenge us, and exploring new ground is a great way to better yourself in the long run. While I let these topics be open for you to choose, in the future (possibly for Week 7 and definitely by Week 11), story lead topics will be assigned to battles.
So I think this is a great time to try out something you might never have done otherwise. And remember, this is supposed to be fun.
Week 2 Rewind
BATTLE REVIEWS by Certain
Song lyrics week produced a ton of really outstanding verses, probably the highest quality week of competition I've seen on this site (excluding the second round of The Winter Topical, since that was a tournament). The battles were close and often excellent.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J5KB8vYOFw
1. Just Write beats El Pancake 9-1. | The Cure, "Disintegration"
BATTLE OF THE WEEK! Both of these assholes were complaining about the topic. Then they both came in and killed it. But, as Frank said in his vote, Just Write "elevated a tier with this one." That's the best way to put it. Just Write took on the Season 2 champion and came out swinging with a moving verse about friendship. He stayed true to his style, which many don't do when faced with tough opposition, and showed remarkable confidence. His verse was the best of the week, which is about the only reason El Pancake lost. El Pancake came in with a rich, heavy dystopian future verse that was told with excellence. The ending was a bit pat for something of his, as he normally prefers more unusual closure. But the verse displayed remarkable depth in its interpretation on predestination. I'm very much on the side of nature over nuture, so I connected with his verse despite the lack of character development. Ultimately the thing that hurt him was length; this was a story that could have been told well in 6,000 words instead of 600.
2. oats beats ZYG 5-0. | Aceyalone, "Keep It True"
Not many this week took advantage of my offer to give more feedback here on verses posted by Thursday, but I knew I could count on ZYG. The man is remarkably quick on the keys (and aided by his Australian time zone). He's also remarkably good with them, even despite his shutout loss. ZYG's strongest asset is his aproach to this game; he might be the best I've ever seen at deconstructing a topic, then piecing it back together to form something that fulfills that topic's potential. I really liked what he did this week, but my guess is part of the reason he lost is the voters' youth. None of us remember 1969, and most of us don't remember the Soviet Union. As a history buff, I appreciated what he did with the topic, but I think he needed to contextualize the traumatic feeling of a Soviet flag being stuck into the surface of the moon more to draw a stronger emotional reaction from the voters. One way to help this would have been providing a bit more fleshed-out characters, perhaps by writing a stanza on a failed mission instead of only giving us the successful one. oats hit all the right notes to beat ZYG. I don't know if he wrote with his opponent (or even opponent's verse) in mind, but his verse provided a deep social commentary on the race to be great while adhering to rigorous mechanical structure and clear wording. That combined with his more approachable content led to the easy win, but this battle was very good on both sides.
3. sacrifice beats Objective 6-5. | Common, "In My Own World (Check the Method)"
For the second week in a row, sacrifice has been a bit underrated by voters, in my opinion. His rhyme schemes are so deft and complex that perhaps they are flying over some heads, especially on quick reads. But the complexities of his verse, both in mechanics and content, are thrilling to read closely. Here he took on drug addiction and relapses in a very smart take on the topic. Objective took the more direct approach in every regard and churned out something that nearly took down the heavy favorite. That says a lot about how far Objective has come, though he always has been a strong storyteller when he keeps things tight. He does need to clean up his writing, as there were numerous subject-verb errors and other hitches, which is a big problem when your writing already lacks much flourish.
4. Vividlyvague beats Mike Wrecka 6-5. | Bruce Springsteen, "Adam Raised a Cain"
I don't think I've ever seen a voting swing quite like this one. Mike Wrecka had a 4-0 lead at one point, one vote away from a shutout victory. His verse on being a dead person in a coffin was creative and extremely polished. The reveal-based ending seemed to have caught readers' attention. Then Vividlyvague stole the momentum, reeling off four votes in a row after being down 5-1. He, too, had a reveal-style ending, and while some voters weren't thrilled about the incestual end, he wrote with enough emotion and deft rhyming to pull through in the end. I had to cast the final vote here, and whil ethis battle was not better than the three above it, it was by far the closest of the week in my mind.
5. Adonis beats Diode 9-7. | Neil Young, "On the Beach"
And the prize to weirdest topical battle I've seen in a while goes to this one. First Adonis comes in with a fucking diss verse. And the weird thing is, it's brilliant. Seriously, this is one of the best verses I've ever seen from Adonis, and the entire impetus is how much of a lame dude Diode is. These Internets breed this weird knowledge, and Adonis and Diode have known each other for about a decade, from what I've gathered. So there is Adonis, taking down this guy he's known for years and whose site he's run tournaments and leagues on for years, and he's doing it with all this specificity that is really funny. And then he combines it with this scattershot flow that really grew on me throughout the verse, and his word choice was tight. This is a one-off verse, which makes it kind of hard to comment on. But I think that flow, heavily grounded in a staccato rhythm, could be built on for the future. And I'd love to see more humor from everyone, though Adonis admittedly was a surprise candidate. Then Diode came in with an introspective verse that seemed a bit strange and almost like a counterpoint in the wake of reading Adonis' verse. I think Diode could have pulled this win out with a bit more creativity simply because it seemed a lot of people were underwhelmed by Adonis' approach. But I thought it was really fun. This can be fun, guys.
6. Pinot Grij beats fresh 5-0. | Royce da 5'9", "Death is Certain, Pt. 2 (It Hurts)"
In theory, I owe fresh some extensive feed. But he's banned for losing a pink-slip match to Diode, so I'll say this: He was blown out of the water largely because the first half of his verse was nonsense. He needed to pull back quite a bit on the vocabulary, as he alienated his readers instead of drawing them in. And fresh was blown out of the water because Pinot Grij is that kind of writer. I said last week that Pinot Grij is the best storyteller on this site (though he might not have the best stories consistently), and I'm sticking by that after his showing here. His wording was pitch-perfect the entire way despite a bevy of rhymes. He's a force, and if he sticks around for long enough, he can take the title.
7. timeless beat TYSON 6-0. | Nas, "What Goes Around"
After last week's conceptual brilliance, timeless took a step back this week. He went for a rather direct attack on the meaning of life, which can work in the right hands. Had dead man handled this topic in the same way, for instance, the results probably would have been brilliant. But to pull no punches, timeless' writing probably is not at the level of complexity required to assertively handle such a direct approach against a better opponent. It's not one specific area as much as everything that needs to be developed, which isn't an insult at all. timeless is adequate in every field, but he could use a bit higher complexity as a rhymer and in his diction, and that comes only with practice and reading. TYSON had a verse with an interesting story line that was made difficult to follow because of his clouded diction. He wrote about a child obsessed with sex among adults, which seems appropriate for the noted board molester. But it couldn't beat timeless' more coherent effort.
8. patrown beats Cereal_Killa 5-0. | Eyedea & Abilities, "Man vs. Ape"
This was a strange battle featuring two centered verses. patrown clearly dug deep for his verse and had a lot of interesting thoughts conveyed on what all we're doing here and the value of truth in a world that seems starved of it. But he has in the past struggled to unify someof his denser verses, and I thought that issue came across here quite a bit. He introduced two characters mid-verse, gave us a few lines about each, then ditched them to return to the abstract. He never tied his laces, so to speak. But he brought together a strong enough ending to leave the reader satisfied that the verse had a purpose, even if that purpose could have been made more explicit. The rhymes were sloppy at times and excellent at others, but that probably comes from the grandiose concept he was attempting. Mostly, though, he won so easily because voters couldn't get into Cereal_Killa's verse. For one, it wasn't a complete story, but even that story itself was elusive and difficult to follow. So yes, this was a strange battle.
9. Frank wins via Clockwerk quasi-no-show. | Jay Z, "Blueprint 2"
One of Frank's favorite things is to imbue a quote topic with wordplay, so here, he turned "defeat" into "the feet" and wrote about waiting in line for a new pair of Jordan sneakers. That was a creative twist on the topic for a 12-line verse. He never made any headway into where things were going, but he did more than Clockwerk, who posted numbers to get a no-show victory in case Frank failed to post in time. Frank almost always posts on time, though, and when I warned Clockwerk of this, he said he simply didn't have any time this week. Hopefully he'll be back.
10. Vulgar wins via H4ZE no-show. | Bob Dylan, "Absolutely Sweet Marie"
You knew Vulgar was behind this verse from the opening line, which simply read "3,000 B.C." That was a bit misleading, it turns out, as the story was set closer to 300 B.C., in the era of the Damara. (Admittedly, there were plenty of mixed references here, but I only learned that because I looked some stuff up, as I alwasy do while reading Vulgar verses.) The story was basic but creative: The feudal landlords of the era (whichever it was) were trying to one up all established order and force people to pay exceedingly high taxes or risk losing their land. They had as their claim to power a fine print of sorts claiming that the villagers had signed away their rights. As a result, the people revolted. It was a creative take on the idea of honest among outlaws, though it admittedly was a bit distancing because of the lack of defined characters. H4ZE ended up not being able to make it because of offline commitments.
11. neutral wins via maths debate no-show. | Ras Kass, "Reelishymn"
Though we still don't know who neutral is, the obvious conclusion from reading his first two verses is that he's talented and British. Everything about his two verses dropped thus far suggests both of those things. This week he took on a topic about exploitation in a very direct manner, after alienating some with his abstractions last week. He described a selfish king in one stanza, then had a really long line through the middle of his post before writing about a farmer who works hard for so little in the next. The lack of a link between the stanzas was probably the biggest problem the verse had; they never felt unified, even at the end. There was some clunky word choice, paritcularly in the first stanza, where on several instances he chose to not rhyme the last syllable of each line and instead build his multiple-syllable rhymes off the penultimate syllables. There also were a few instances of strange usage, such as "piece the delicious fish" as a way of describing dividing a meal. But the deft rhyme schemes were evident, and the verse was another example of why neutral could be a threat if he sticks around. maths debate popped in Thursday to say he couldn't make it, and I'm not sure if he realized verses were due the next day.
12. Ink wins via Greed no-show. | The Who, "Behind Blue Eyes"
After talking a little trash last week at this week's opponent, Ink ended up not having much time this week apparently. His verse was fine but definitely not as polished as his effort against YDK. He took the "bad guy" quote in a logical but creative route, writing about the wide-eyed new boss at a toy store who eventually stops being so nice to his employees as he tires of their competence. The concept was good, and the writing was clean and smooth. But the narrative fell a bit flat because of the lack of a singular guiding set of reference points. Ink never completely involved the reader in the story because he never set the scene up properly and he jumped time twice, accentuating that issue. Still, this was a good display and probably would have beaten Greed, who didn't show and then complained about their not being extensions even though he hadn't even asked for one.
13. dyedinthewool wins via dull boy no-show. | Nirvana, "Drain You"
dyedinthewool got through 12 rather interesting lines but said she couldn't finish her verse. Her take on the topic was spot-on, writing from the perspective of Marie Antoinette to tackle a wonderfully narcissistic quote from Kurt Cobain. She showed good writing fundamentals yet again, but this time had the concept down pat, too. Now all she needs to do is come up with the time in her busy schedule to write a complete verse. Still, I enjoyed this submission, though I have to admit that I'm not entirely sure where it was going. dull boy no-showed again after again seeming like he might show.
14. YDK wins via WZA no-show. | The Beatles, "Yesterday"
So WZA has not logged into his account here since dropping his Week 1 verse back Feb. 24. It suffices to say he no-showed. YDK intially seemed conflicted on whether or not to drop a verse, but I think we all should be writing regardless of wins or losses. This isn't a battle league, where good punchlines can be saved. If you're writing on topic, that verse should not be reusable at a later date in most cases. Anyway, YDK dropped a relatively short, rhyme-heavy personal verse about everything he's overcome. YDK definitely has had an interesting life, but I think he would be well-advised to consider broadening his scope more often or even coming up with more creative ways to deliver his own stories. The rhymes here were forced, but that happens often in quickly written verses.
15. Innovator wins via Totoro no-show. | The Clash, "The Call Up"
I was hoping Totoro would go this season without a no-show. Alas, it's Week 2. Innovator was worried about not having time to show as well but did carve out enough to write a very abstract verse on the subject of life and death. The verse was very unbalanced, but there were some flashes that showed that if he took his time and polished it, there was something there. It just seemed like it might have been written by phone and very hastily read over, if at all. There were a bunch of mistakes, and a lot of the thoughts and rhymes never connected. I know Innovator is capable of much better than this, but I'm glad he showed. I think he has the shell of something he could develop further, if he chooses.
16. King Ra. wins via Exoduzt no-show. | Led Zeppelin, "No Quarter"
Knowing his opponent would not show, King Ra. posted a short little ode to the topic itself, discussing what he might have done had he written a story. He may have done so, actually, but he didn't show it to us. Exoduzt no-showed, then complained about not getting feedback in Open Mic.
NO-SHOW SHINE by Just Write
Since he votes on every battle, Just Write decided to step up and give some feedback on the completed verses he couldn't vote on.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwVLMJrwKyM
Welcome gentlemen, and dyedinthewool. It was another week of absolutely amazing talent and a pretty good turn out. I believe I read Certain say that we had only 7 people no show out of 32 which is a pretty great for only being week two of the AWOL. Hopefully everybody stays involved throughout this league and we can make this the best season yet. Ok so this section is dedicated to those who put time and effort into a piece only to have been no showed by some asshole who was either too intimidated to write against these people or just plain lazy. I mean come on, these really isn't an excuse to not write when you have five days. I will not be including people who tried to crunch out a win by pussily submitting a few lines of bullshit a couple minutes prior to deadline, you people suck. For the people no-showed, I strongly suggest they post their pieces in the OM, for those of you who have i will include a link to your piece and the rest of you should go feed these guys for their hard work. I purposely haven't read anyone's piece who was no showed yet, so without boring you any longer and in no particular order lets jump into this
Innovator | "He who will die is he who will kill." — Joe Strummer
This was a pretty deep piece to me, i actually enjoyed it quite a bit. Sometimes when im reading pieces that are not just straight to the point i find myself getting bored and just trying to rush through it and then end up having to reread it again to find its meaning. This was not the case with this piece such as pieces from zygote, vulgar ect. And that not a diss to them but it's a compliment to innovator. I think as a writer it's your job to make something beautiful, yet still understandable to the reader/voter. Perfect example was Ck's piece this week. A fucking beautiful piece yet i didn't know what the hell he was talking about. Innovator kept a classy while still simple if that makes sense. My only gripe is maybe he tried to do TOO MUCH in some area's as far as multi's i believe some words were thrown in just for rhyme sake which is fine, we all do it but sometimes too much makes the flow imo seem a little choppy and that's what i noticed in a few spots here. Overall good read though
Ink | "No one knows what it's like to be the bad guy." — Pete Townshend
Lol, so this was a really cool story, with the third verse being the most entertaining. My only thing is i didn't like the word fisticuffs (though i know its a netcee thing and brings personality to the piece) i just feel it was odd in this piece. But it was also probably thrown in there to get a smile out of the reader which it did so bravo i guess. And the chris brown line also seemed out of place but made me laugh as well. I dug your take on this topic and have been there myself. I remember when i was younger and I got promoted and treat all my employees like just friends, smoked with them on lunch breaks ect. Big mistake, after awhile they lose all respect for you than you have to turn into an asshole (the bad guy) before you can get any work out of them. Really great job on this one ink, flow was butter, mechanics on point. Didn't really like the one month later, three months later bit but i also see why it was necessary. better than last week as far as tackling the topic imo. Shame it was no showed
neutral | "Exploitation is the world's oldest occupation" — Ras Kass
Natural, neutral.. one of you need to change your name cuz that shits fucking confusing am I right? You know where you fucked up, posting your verse so early, you literally scared the shit out of maths debate til he just quit... 2 days prior to deadline lmao. Nah but for real this piece was NICE. Now one question, who are you? Obv alias. Split perhaps? I noticed he just disappeared all weird and gay like. I miss millhouse. Anyways yea i really dug this piece, it was very very mechanically sound and definitely made me want to read more from you so props. There were a few instances where you kind of made hypocritical statements (maybe hypocritical isn't the right word) but for example first you say fuck god, then a few lines later you're praying to him but that's just nitpicking to the extreme. This was probably my favorite out of the no shows I've read so far. Stay in the league man. I'm excited to see you write some more
Vulgar | "To live outside the law, you must be honest." — Bob Dylan
Man i don't want to even read your piece, we all already know it was some groundbreaking philosophical piece that would have ethered haze out of existence.. no but for real. Nice fuckin piece man, there really isn't anything negative i can say about this piece so i was planning on quoting some lines i thought were fire and when i was trying to copy and paste i just kept extending lines till i copied the whole fucking piece so that should just tell you how great this piece was. Your obviously a talented dude with a vast knowledge of many subjects. Yea this is turning into like a "praise vulgar" paragraph now so Im going to just stop... now.
YDK | "I'm not half the man I use to be." — Paul McCartney
Damn man, the last couple weeks you've really came alive. I enjoyed this piece so much because i can relate to a lot of it as i'm sure many others can too. It just had a very sincere feel to it. Like a pouring out of the heart.. we all try to add emotion to our pieces but its rare that real emotion is felt and thats exactly what i felt throughout this piece. It was short but very effective and I commend you for that. Props my man, looking forward to seeing what you have this week
Ok everybody thanks for tuning into my little corner of the mag. It's my first time doing this so if it wasn't up to par my bad. No fuck that i did this all from my phone so give me my god damned props faggots haha jk, no but seriously. And i want to tell certain props as well for doing this shit every week without even participating. Appreciate the dedication bro. Til next time people. Im out.
Week 3 Preview
POWER RANKINGS by oats
One of our most noted contributors tackles the task of ranking the best in this league in an arbitrary order and probably does a better job than your humble moderator.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zEcbSYjDZ8
Oats here, coming at you with this week’s power rankings. As a preface, I used a number of different data points to lead me to an otherwise arbitrary hierarchy. I used last week’s rankings as the starting point, as well as record, verse quality, strength of competition, and cumulative vote differential. In the case of no-show wins, quality of verse supplanted competition and differential. I also excluded people who signed out, as well as myself, since it’s a conflict of interest. SHIT IS REAL PROFESSIONAL ROUND HERE.
10. Pinot Grij (1-0)
Last Week: Not ranked, beat unranked Fresh 6-0
Vote Differential: 6-0
Pinot is an interesting writer. He has flashes of top-tier showings, but I’ve never seen him stick around enough to make any serious dents. If he does show up consistently, there’s no doubt in my mind that he will be a contender. Shutting out Fresh was a good start, but this week he will have to step-up to the always game Mike Wrecka.
9. ZYG (1-1)
Last Week: Ranked third, lost to No. 9 oats 5-0
Vote Differential: 8-7
Zyg’s momentum was halted last week by the oatmeal buzz saw, but he still remains a force to be reckoned with. As a former champ and widely revered topicalist, Zyg is expected to rebound back into contention sooner than later. Whether or not he will place himself back into the top 5 will be greatly influenced by his performance this week against newcomer Neutral.
8. Timeless (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked 10th, beat unranked Tyson 5-0
Vote Differential: 11-0
Timeless is in a class of his own, as the only person who has had two matches go to votes without dropping a single one. While impressive, he’s done so against lesser competition, both of whom he was expected to steamroll. He’s steadily carving a name out for himself, and a win against oats would be a big statement of his arrival.
7. Ink (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked eighth, won via no-show by unranked Greed
Vote Differential: 9-8
Ink squeaked by a tough YDK in week one, but got a breather last week when Greed no-showed. He still dropped a strong verse that proves he has a conceptual potency to his writing. He will need to bring his A-game in all areas to remain undefeated, as a bout with heavyweight Frank looms.
6. Patrown (2-0)
Last Week: Not ranked, beat unranked Cereal_Killa 6-0
Vote Differential: 6-0
Patrown got his chance to flex his ability last week, besting the tough journeyman Ceral Killa. Patrown has been around for a while, though has yet to make a splash in the topical pools here on NC. With an upcoming match against the streaking Just Write on the horizon, Patrown will have an opportunity to raise his stock and slide into a contender match with a W.
5. Adonis (2-0)
Last Week: Not ranked, beat No. 7 Diode 9-7
Vote Differential: 9-7
Underdog Adonis surprised a lot of people with his win over highly-touted Diode last week. The surprise wasn’t him winning, but rather how he won, with a pseudo-diss verse against his opponent that tied into the given topic. This outside-of-the-box thinking should serve him well in his upcoming match with Vulgar, a battle that provides yet another opportunity for Adonis to turn some heads if he wins.
4. Vividlyvague (1-1)
Last Week: Ranked seventh, beat unranked Mike Wrecka 6-5 but was one vote shy of the requirement
Vote Differential: 6-5
Vivid escaped Mike Wrecka last week in the closest match of the week, rallying from a 4-0 deficit. Vivid made a name for himself last year, and is looking to build upon that and become a legit contender. He faces another stern test this week, with the formidable King Ra standing in his way from a spot in a contender match.
3. Just Write (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked fifth, beat No. 1 El Pancake 9-1
Vote Differential: 15-1
No one seems to work as hard as Just Write. Not only is he voting on every battle, he’s absorbing any and every piece of advice he can get his hands on. Last week he impressed with a flattening of top-ranked Pancake, an upset that surprised most. This week will be an interesting test, as he swaps roles and becomes the favorite against dark-horse Patrown.
2. Vulgar (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked fourth, win via no-show by unranked H4ZE
Vote Differential: 5-0
Vulgar is a perennial heavyweight in the topical community, regarded for his imaginative imagery and creative concepts. One of the early favorites to champ the league, Vulgar will have to get through the unorthodox Adonis to cash in on that expectation. While still the favorite this week, Adonis is a definite step-up in competition from weeks 1 and 2.
1. Frank (2-0)
Last Week: Ranked second, win via quasi-no-show by unranked Clockwerk
Vote Differential: 11-1
There isn’t much to say about Frank that isn’t already archived somewhere. He’s somewhat of a controversial figure for his antics on the board, but he is still undeniably dope. After thrashing topical legend Sacrifice in the first round, he faced no resistance in week 2 as his opponent posted a no-show verse. After a disappointing loss in last season’s finals and an early exit in the Winter Tourney, Frank looks to be in championship form again.
Notable Newcomers
Witty: In my mind, Witty is perpetually underrated. He has a poetic touch of language and top-tier rhyme schemes, with the ability to bend topics into engaging stories and clever metaphors. He’s proven that on any given day he can beat anyone, but he still needs to prove his consistency. Starting off with a week 1 no-show didn’t help his case, but should he stick around, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him crash into the top 5.
Rawn MD: For all the guff he gets for being a ridiculous persona and all but proven pathological liar, Rawn is actually a good writer. He excels with rhyme schemes and fluid rhythms, and when a topic suits his preferences he can do a good impersonation of an elite writer. He’s still unproven in the topical arena, as he is prone to criminal deviances, alien abductions, Ivy League lectures, and vehicular kidnappings. In the event that the world takes it easy on him for a week, he has the potential to surprise people.
PREDICTIONS by Certain
Without knowing who would pick which topic, these predictions were more difficult than normal. Without big baby to help, these predictions are less funny than last week. Deal with it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5efvUqH5Oo
Frank (2-0) vs. Ink (2-0)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! These are two storytellers in that traditional sense. They both have shown they like to approach even open-ended topics with story bents, so they should be natural fits for the more defined and linear nature of this week's topics. Still, I tend to give the advantage to Frank just about all the time, and I think Ink is going to have to tighten his mechanics considerably here to win this battle. Frank is very creative, but Ink still can win the originality battle if he comes up with the right blend of hitting the topic while bringing something new to it. But can he outwrite Frank? Prediction: Frank 60-40.
Vulgar (2-0) vs. Adonis (2-0)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! This should be the most esoteric battle of the week, at the least. It'd be really weird if these two both came with concrete stories set in the real world without any overarching aspirations, and it'd be a bit disappointing at the same time. So the question is, does Adonis have what it takes to beat Vulgar? Yes, to be blunt. But that doesn't mean he will. Vulgar has been on point lately, showing a consistency through The Winter Topical and the first two weeks of this season that he lacked last season. And letting him pick his own poison will make it very difficult for Adonis, who otherwise might have benefited from a topic that played into his hands. This might be the first Season 2 rematch, and their Week 1 match was close, though Vulgar prevailed. Prediction: Vulgar 62-38.
oats (2-0) vs. timeless (2-0)
One of the things I've always liked, even when on the wrong end, about topical battling is that the best writer does not win every time. So yes, timeless does have a shot to advance to 3-0 even as he faces off with perhaps the most polished writer in this league. That hope comes in the fact that oats has not shown the same grip on straight-forward storytelling as he holds on topical writing. timeless needs to deliver a pitch-perfect approach to whichever topic he chooses, though, because oats is very reliable. I anticipate oats will find some way to write about the beach. Prediction: oats 69-31.
Just Write (2-0) vs. patrown (2-0)
How many times have I used the word "grounded" so far? Well, patrown might succeed this week because the story leads will ground him a bit and tie down his tendencies to go way too big, unless he decides to go against my warning anyway. Just Write is on a hot streak and writing the best material I've seen from him, forming his own voice and place among the better writers on this site in the process. But Just Write thrives in part because his opponents don't connect the same way he does, with the audience or with the topic. patrown needs to nullify that. Prediction: Just Write 56-44.
Pinot Grij (1-0) vs. Mike Wrecka (1-1)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! These two staged a pretty memorable battle once already, way back in the Writing Challenge League last fall. Mike Wrecka won that with one of the best verses I've read from him, a ridiculous and ridiculously creative take on ventriloquism that earned my vote. Can he duplicate it? He again will need to come up with the better, more creative story here because he doesn't have the mechanical prowess Pinot Grij shows in every verse. But you cannot count out Mike Wrecka, as he has shown plenty of times on this site. He's a rock. Pinot Grij is one of those guys who gets favored against just about anyone, and Mike Wrecka is one of those guys who can beat any favorite. Predictions: Pinot Grij 52-48.
Vividlyvague (1-1) vs. King Ra. (1-1)
Vividlyvague is coming off a big win (which he hasn't received credit for yet, hence the record) against Mike Wrecka, while King Ra. has a loss to Vulgar and a no-show win. But this is a rather evenly matched battle. King Ra. has an edge in experience and consistent fundamentals, while Vividlyvague's bombastic storytelling has tightened up this season, and he's improved his mechanics a bit. That takes a lot of the advantages away from King Ra., but we all know what he can do when he puts his mind to it. Vividlyvague is the hot hand, though, so I've got to favor him. Prediction: Vividlyvague 55-45.
neutral (1-1) vs. ZYG (1-1)
BATTLE OF THE WEEK CONTENDER! The foreigns! I don't know that neutral is a foreigner, but he writes like it. ZYG is from another planet, so that qualifies. His verse already is up, but I haven't read it. I would be surprised if neutral didn't, though I always advise people against peeking at opponents' verses before writing themselves. Story leads really fit ZYG's style, and I think he would have been my preseason pick to win it all in a league with only story leads. But he might be at a slight disadvantage in a scenario in which everyone can choose their own topics because he loses some of that creativity edge. neutral has shown adept at mechanics but hasn't interested me with his content yet. Will that change when he can pick his fate? Prediction: ZYG 59-41.
Zenland (0-0) vs. cyph her (0-0)
I have absolutely no clue what will happen here. Zenland has been known to submit swag and flow verses for topical battles. He's been known to write in paragraph format despite knowing voters generally dislike it. cyph her, to the best of my knowledge, has dropped one verse on this site, in the Diss The Emcee Above You cypher. It was a bit rough mechanically, but I don't want to hold that brief contribution against her. Still, Zenland is the known commodity, and he can write very well when he wants. Prediction: Zenland 64-36.
Witty (0-1) vs. Rawn MD (0-1)
I refuse to acknowledge this battle until they both show.
dyedinthewool (0-2) vs. Innovator (0-2)
Both of these 0-2 records could be 1-1 if they do the extra voting allotted, so don't look at this battle just as a pair of bad records. dyedinthewool has impressed me a lot with her wording and rhyme schemes, but she also has failed to carve out enough time to commit to a verse and content in the first two weeks. Innovator also says time is an issue, and he has long been one of the most up and down competitors around. This battle is exceptionally difficult to pick, but I'm going to favor the person whose submissions have impressed me more this season, based on quality rather than quantity. Prediction: dyedinthewool 51-49.
YDK (0-2) vs. Objective (0-2)
Like dyedinthewool and Innovator, YDK turn one of his losses to a win if he does some extra voting this week. But Objective simply has been on the wrong end of a pair of tough battles, against Just Write and sacrifice. These are two very different writers, with YDK showing more polish while Objective has a more active imagination. I tend to think this set of topics should be an advantage to the natural storytellers, but then you also get someone like YDK, who has shown he can tell a story when he's forced but too often avoids it against his own good. Here he can pull away from his own internalized thoughts and give us a structured story, and if he does that, he can win. Objective might be too creative for him, though. Prediction: Objective 52-48.
Until We Meet Again
CONCLUSION by Certain
I hope you all enjoyed this edition of the Art of Writing League's weekly periodical. Thanks to Just Write and oats for contributions. big baby and mustachio are honeymooning in Lake Minnetonka right now, and who knows when they'll be back. I'm always looking for help, particularly with giving no-show verses their due respect, so if you'd like to give some feedback, let me know. Thanks, and let's have another great week.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3Sd2gDkSV8