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View Full Version : AOWL WK12: cakecakecake (0-4) VS. Figurative (0-0) [FIGURATIVE WINS BY NO SHOW.]


King Ra.
05-11-2013, 12:50 AM
16 lines minimum, 48 lines maximum. (if agreed upon by both participants, you may go beyond the limit at your own risk.)

Verses are due WEDNESDAY 5/15 at 11:59 PST.
Extensions are due THURSDAY 5/16 at 11:59 PST.
(There is a 6 hour grace period following the end of the extension deadline. If you fail to post anything by the end of the grace period time, you will be given the no show loss.)

You must vote on at least 4 other battles and post links in the Voting Thread. For every absent vote, you will be deducted ONE vote next week.

Voting ends MONDAY 5/20 at 11:59 PST.(Unless otherwise it may be extended another day at the most.)

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If you no-show, you will be removed from next week and have to sign back into the league.

NOTE:
Swaying, excessive freeposting, voter fraud etc. are grounds for vote deductions at discretion of the moderators.
Editing your verse after the grace period, after your opponent posts, or after the first vote (especially this)- as well as biting- are grounds for disqualification at discretion of the moderators.


TOPIC: Your job this week is simple.... you can either use the title of the book or the image on the cover as your main idea for your piece this week. Whatever you are able to come up with.

http://i40.tinypic.com/5leasn.jpg




Good luck to both participants. Figurative cakecakecake

Fig
05-11-2013, 11:42 AM
Checkkk

PancakeBrah
05-15-2013, 02:31 PM
I'm writing now.

PancakeBrah
05-15-2013, 09:24 PM
Ext?

I've got 16 written. I'd like to refine and expand it.

Fig
05-15-2013, 10:26 PM
For sure, I need one too possibly.

Fig
05-17-2013, 05:15 AM
The aches are gone now. There is time till they hit back.
Play time sounds best, since I skipped nap.
There’s a lot of games that me and mom like to play in the ships shaft,
But only one can make all the sick pass.
I hate the sick, it hurts, but Mr. Zero g s’wy it lasts
And mommy says he lives in the thick black.
Now I get into her arms, she gently toss’ me ‘cross ship fast,
Then I float, kick the end, and I swim back...

It’s best if we played forever, but right before that, she always quits
I've never seen time, but mommy tells me he’s awfully quick
I guess today I’m six, but five is what I have always been
“Can I be five again tomorrow?” she doesn't answer at first, just softly grins.
“Honey, I’d keep you this old if I could, but know that everyone ages”
She rubs my head, then hears static. It’s a call from the station.
I hide in my bunker, cuz those voices are too rough and too scary
But Mommy takes the call and answers. I don’t know how she’s bearing.
Fingers in ears. The aches are back. Eyes start to tear.
Laid flat on my back. Stomach cramps. Heart is in fear.
My brain knock knock knocks, like it wants to escape.
Every bone in my body quivers. I don’t like when I shake.
I shut my eyes, roll into a ball, and pray out to God
Suddenly, I’m lifted up, and Mommy’s singing me songs.
Her voice, it stops the aches and all the shivers at first
Then the tears, sick, and pain go away with her words.
I only need this sound. No ship or black space
Just silly stories of heaven, God, and the bad place.
Or my favorite tale of all, the one that I hear the most
It’s the one that I heard today, while mommy cradled me close.
“Remeber all of the times that I spoke about home,
where there are animals and people , so you’re never alone?”
“Earth” I said, “Yes, very good, now understand,
that in a day we’re headed there, as always was planned.
Now all I ask is that you manage to be my little man,
because the things you see and hear will be quite hard to grasp.
Things may seem harder at first, as it will be to stand
walk, and breath, so for a while, we may live in a lab.
But one day, I promise you, we will visit the lands,
and the ocean, so I can teach you how to really swim back...”

When we landed, the ship shook harder than I do.
The safety belt kept me still, but I couldn’t move if I tried to.
Mommy looked at me, gave a smile, then climbed loose,
Then she unbuckled me as I thought, why is the sky blue?
The ship opened up, and right away I panicked.
“That’s not supposed to happen!” “But baby, we’ve landed...”
There was so much light, I dug my head in her shoulder.
Sometimes I think I am hurting her by how tighlty I hold her.
With one arm she carries me, the other one waves.
The noises hit me right away, and hum in my brain.
There’s so many... Im not sure of what, but there’s plenty.
I wish the voices were loud enough to be deafening.
We head into a tall rock where it’s way more quiet.
At first, just me and mommy sit in our own silence.
Then these men walk in, and they seem so tall.
They start speaking, sounding just like the radio calls.
“Rickets and frail bone structure of substantial measure.
Enlarged skull, by-product of intracraniul pressure...”
Mommy talks to them, then at the end she says,
“Baby, these men are here to get to running some tests.
Now look, it’s alright to be scared a little,
But these men are here to help, cause’ you’re so frail and brittle.
I wont be far, only right down the hall,
So if you need me for anything, give mommy a call.
I love you baby, and I’ll see you tonight, but for now, I must leave”
And so she did, for the next 522 weeks.

I bet in real homes, people don’t have to sit in despair.
But i guess, what is a home but just a gloryfied chair?
An electric one, preferably. Just something that’d murder me.
Well I don’t think I’m suicidal. Nah, they’re all just words to me.
Now words to me, they’re everything. They make a persons temperament.
So figure my feelings being dubbed “the worlds greatest science expirement”.
Now aint that something? Wouldnt mommy be proud?
I wish that voice projected on me from the height of the clouds.
At least now I know she lived out all of her harder days,
Cause’ this world looks so much better when you’re physically far away.
Mentally, I couldn’t do it, every voice is reminder
Of one that had some healing power, lighter words and was kinder.
All I get spewed at me are test results. Pure insanity
how we use the same language, but they speak chalk full of apathy.
We cant be the same. I am not of this planet.
Yeah we can share some DNA, but I wasn’t born here, damnit.
Alone, they sent my mom into the great up above.
Artificial insemination, so I wasn’t concieved out of love.
They didn’t know if I’d make it, but boy they sure lucked up.
Got an ample little sample. AND I’M SURE FUCKED UP!
The fluid pressure on my eyes made me partially blind,
On top of that, I formed with discs misalligned in my spine.
Why they keep me here, I’ll never know; prolonging death.
They’ve gotten everything they needed out of me with their tests.
I’m sure they plan to get to me, as they did with my mother.
Can’t have a soul to attest to cruelties they keep undercover.
But I’ll be damned if they do, I won’t fight death, but I’ll have it my way.
First comes the easy part, that’s to plan the escape.
Most of the day, I’m here alone. There’s many shots for a get away.
So I wait til there’s a clearing, then I reach for my metal cane.
Stumble off the premesis, now I am city bound.
It takes about an hour at the speed that I get around.
I call out for a cab, and I’m surprised no one recognized me.
Don’t you all know? I’M A FUCKING CELEBRITY!
He takes me to the sea, and of course I don’t pay.
The driver’s yelling at me now. Just more words full of hate.
I limp to the edge of the pier, very ready for fate.
For the first time in a decade, there’s no presence of aches.

I fall in. Every single bone was broken on impact
But I’ve never been that complete since my ship past.
My senses, they sink fast. Now I’m away from all the masculine syntax
And at this depth, I see no reason to swim back...

King Ra.
05-17-2013, 06:58 AM
FIGURATIVE WINS BY NO SHOW.