Week 12: 9. zygote (8-3) vs. 10. Vividlyvague (6-4) \\ zygote wins 6-0

[Certain]

http://i.imgur.com/uAJesXX.png

Season 3



The Basics | Read the full rules here (http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=54688).

Verses are due Friday at 11:59 p.m. PT. THERE ARE NO EXTENSIONS.

Votes are due Sunday at 11:59 p.m. PT.

Verses may not exceed 48 lines or 650 words unless agreed upon by the opponent.

Voting on three battles is required. If you win and don't vote, you will receive a loss instead. If you lose and don't vote, you will receive a one-week suspension. Please post links to your three votes in this thread (http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=71391).


Topic


http://i.imgur.com/9fNYId4.jpg


Good luck, zygote and Vividlyvague.

[zygote]

THE 6 HORSEMEN OF THE POSTMODERN WARHOLIAN APOCALYPSE.

PESTILENCE: Low-fat yogurt - 99% sugar-free.
No added preservatives. Lite, Light, Healthy. Vitamins A – Z.
Source of fibre. Total carbohydrate. Great source of energy.
Negative trans fats. GMO free. Lactose, gluten, soy bean friendly.
Labor aware coffee. Ethnically sensitive espresso.
The ABC seal of approval. Humanely processed in a free range meadow.
Low-fat yogurt - Aspartame-1, Hydrogenated sodium caseinate.
Diopotassium Phosphate, Acesulfame Potassium, Sodium Aluminosilicate.

WAR: Touchdown! Homerun! It’s a battle out there John Madden!
Offhanding the pigskin, he body slammed him! He’s down? What happened!?
Yeah he’s a real fighter, this young kid it looks like a fatality.
It’s a war out there, our prayers go out to his family.
Meanwhile… In recent news, [number] died in [location] in an [event].
At the News, we don’t just report the news we sensationalize death.
This summer… PG13 flashes of gore with a catchy score.
Starring ACTION STAR in “WAR ACTION 4: THE ACTION WAR!”

CONQUEST: “Hi my names Cliché! And I’m your perfect dream girl!
Wow I love that too! We met petting the sea urchins at sea world!
I’m so cute when I’m awkward, so awkward and cute!
Funny, interesting and cool and smart! I’m a novelty too!
And Heyy my names Generic Love Interest! And I’m a sexual object!
My purpose is to solely exist for your eventual conquest!
I don’t get the concept! Girls respect your body, but shake that booty!
And watch your mirror like it’s your favorite movie!

FAMINE: Eat it up. Stay in tune with the fashion.
LOL. A picture of a cat with a humorous caption.
Ten seconds have passed without being amused and distracted.
LOL. A picture of a cat with a humorous caption.
I need an instant update for this IPOD farmville game.
The information is here. Time to update my social network status page!
Am I feeling up or down? - Where am I now? - What did I just eat? –
Isn’t this constant stream of every single little tiny little thing just so really very neat?
I must let everyone know that I don’t feel alone.

RHETORIC: “The recipe for preparing your lover as a cannibal banquet: feel free.”
For brevity, tear it asunder at the actual fabric, see me –
A speciality - the terror of thunder and laughter of magic: TV.
Essentially, carelessly blunder and be hyperactive dramatic: E.T.!
Really, rarely I wonder… Step up your game. Irrelevant. Name.
Unfettering each decadent, decorative phrase within a specialist frame.
The precipice of excellence. A pre-requisite claim to feign impressionist elegant claims.
A pendulous flame with incredible range. Are you not entertained?

DEATH: I rang my home.
My boy answered,
he didn’t recognize my voice,
I clutched his plush toy in my hand,
I told him it’s me - dad.
He said DAD!
So I talked with my boy on the phone,
Asked him how was school,
He said it was nice and he got to take the guinea pig home overnight.
I asked him if his mom was there,
he said no she’s out again.
I said did she leave you there alone?
Yeah.
I said what are you doing now?
Just watching TV.
I told him me too,
And then I asked what channel are you watching?
He told me channel 8 so I turned on the TV and switched to channel 8.
And for a minute, I listened to him laugh as he watched the cartoons.
I didn’t know how to tell him the news.

[e11even]

The enigmatic cinematic of life.
Reels, polaroid fills, stills- all of classic device...
Raped. Pillaged, outlasted in trite
form. In the mind's eye, the blasphemous type.
Overblown, underworked, overproduced,
overtoned, wonders hurt from misuse.
Somber homes mourned. Liza Min-refuse,
Marilyn Monstrocities, Elviral Pres-releases. No excuse.
Matter-of factly compacting wounds
with nonsensical wit in pale, plastic rooms
In front of sensationists and social baboons.
What is that which is born out of perception?
Answer: not something born out of a womb.
Inception through social congregation: reflection.
Reception. Ovation. Acceptance. Neglect wins.
Who loses? We all. We fall together: the next trend.
Respect instrospection, the facade of social inspection,
The mirage of global collection. Resolve to save all the remnants-
coveted erections, originality rejected, portraits of mortality's nexus.
The eternity of love and passion: our depiction of art.
The infinity captured in a shapely scripture with fragmented parts.
These are real, genuine. No rehab. Refinish.
No acquisition to reposition. Nothing deminished.

"Art is what you can get away with..."
Fuck those galleries and everything in them.

-Anonymous

[timeless]

I feel like I've read Zyg's piece before. I know you had one up a couple weeks back, against frank? And then took it down and put up a different one. Overall I don't know how to feel about it, mostly your ending and how it relates to the rest of the read. Was a treat to see you come more flow and rhyme heavy this week opposed to essay form. War and Famine sections were dope. Was it vivid who said he's sick of hearing people say you write like cake? Either way I sense a chris black style this around. Like Zyg's, I don't know how to feel about this. I get what you were going for just felt it needed to be longer to match up to Zyg this week. Last bar was cool. Particularly this : "Who loses? We all. We fall together: the next trend.//Respect instrospection, the facade of social inspection." Not a bad read though, content wise. Vivid left me feeling incomplete, I have to give it to zyg for the more entertaining and well-rounded read.

V.Zygote

[Cereal_Killa]

Zygote:
Smashem out the f’n park ace.. seriously “title” BOOM
and i had no idea you had this pic when i checked in, otherwise fact i would not have dropped that ish in there PERIOD..

1# OFF THE SHELF.. my ex was 2nd year bachelor of health science, hitting honors twice..
That ish flowed like butter..

2# not to be fucked with “syndicate wars” R rating.. wtf - “sensationalize death.” Hells yeh

3# And Heyy my names Generic Love Interest! Sold - And watch your mirror

4# Step up your game

Hugh breath.. massive – kinda like say you gave me a mouse trap clipped it to my penis everytime i turned on my tv.. and then and then i realized you didn’t give me a mouse trap, pop culture is divinity.. Also you’re a legend.. That is all

Vivid:
Enigmatic cinematic
cold shivers,
Reels, polaroid fills, stills- all of classic device...
Mate – straight to the point OK when a writer can dot point syllable to syllable – and catch every single drop of someones attention.. Mind blown..
The chop of the names, of what are labelled as great but are published in a manner of torture and glamour; was an ice pick with a lobotomy like stasis..
The clot.. heroin with plastic spoons – omg
“Neglect” smeared like a fucken scarlet letter

Vote = Zygote

now this is all the way down the line and my hand should not have been in this pot, and i apologize to the fullest..
Here voting on this was crazy, i went for fast paced running with the bombardment of everything all at once, instead of the dot point factor in the overwhelming sense of things.. which both had..
Brilliant guys..

[Frank]

Doing these votes from my phone. Pardon the brevity of the following well thought out vote.


Zygote,
Buffet of an assortment of ideas. A interesting approach giving each skull a small commemoration like banquet. You could have continued each stanza out into an indulging full course meal like verse but you wrote little appetizer stanzaz. Each stanza was distinct in tonality showing off your versatility to the max. Really diversified character sketches - A brady bunch box of personality. I personally enjoyed the famine paragraph the most. The yogurt section would have been interesting to read in its entirety. Would have also like to see a conclusion stanza wrapping it all up. You seem to have difficulties with ending your submissions on definitive notes. They anticlimactically end without much gusto or triumph. They simply stall towards the checkered flag and crawl to the finish line. You wrote really well that one week, and ended the verse with major momentum. Work on creating memorable last lines and you'll elevate a little further.

Vividlyvague
A dry dialogue deprived verse. Maybe your most tame piece yet. I think tampering with what works for you in a high stakes match up may not have been the wisest decision. If you fell into the trap of reading Zygs verse before hand I can totally see why you were off the mark this week. Once you read your opponents submission you wrote for your opponent rather than yourself. Manipulating mistake.

MVGT Zygote

[Three-Planes-Aligned]

Zygote - I liked the topical framework of your approach, simple yet expressive (the social commentary was at times pretty toxic). The callback LOL cat line was fantastic.

Vividlyvague - I liked what you did in the scope of this limited span - elegant tie-in to the picture with a good balance of the unsaid and the intuitively logical

I vote Zygote because it was just an all around polished product executed with high proficiency

[Soulstice]

zyg - very nice. flow wasnt as tight as usual but the poetic contrast vs your usual voice was cool, it didnt reach a traditional conclusion but it left me with a sense of clarity regardless

vivid - good flow, pretty phrasing, but rather unencompassing to me. imagery couldve been developed more to strengthen your attack and give a more focused approach to the topic

sorry for the short votes

v - zygote

[King Ra.]

Zyg, you've been rolling, especially the past couple weeks. This week, no exception. A humorous take on the image. Rhymes were on point as was the content. Very creative approach and it worked well here. No major qualms with your piece. Vivid, I'm pretty shocked. Im used to reading very detailed narratives from you but you went the topical route this week. Not saying this was bad, it was written well. But it feels very dry though. I thought there were some strong phrasing and the ending was a nice conclusion but it really lacks much depth. I feel you maybe didn't have any complete idea to gow ith the image, and just decided to go a basic route, which is something we definitely are not accustomed to when reading your work.

The decision is pretty clear here. I felt Vivid didn't really put a complete effort in this match up, and his piece didn't pack that extra kick like it usually does. Zyg dropped one of the better pieces this week, a creative and humorous piece and that gives him my vote in this one.

MVGT: Zygote. Good job by both competitors.