how come yyou experience more obstacles when you REALLY need to take a shit?!

[Badweather]

Every single time, without fail. I'm driving up to MD, and about 5 minutes into the drive I get gurgles. 15 minutes in, I gets to the point where it's now safe to panic. No worries, I'm 2 miles from my exit. Boom, there's mad traffic cause people can't merge when construction is going down. I'm flipping out, my dog starts whimpering and scratching at the back of my seat. 10 minutes of ridiculous focus and meditation, I find mc donald's. I storm in with my belt off, and there's a non English speaking mother fucked taking a shit in the only stall. I'm like "fuuuuuck." I bend down and start thinking of a plan b. After 3 minutes the toilet flushes twice and Spanish dude comes out all "sorrrrry sorrrry." I'm almost done.

[Objective]

If shit like that didn't happen to you it would bring shame to your name.

In all seriousness: When you're stressed I guess the stomach can start acting up or if you've been working/been busy and you start to ease up the body starts working on other stuff. Idk, I'm no doctor, but that's my guess. The road construction stuff can happen, it just seems so much worse because of the situation. The dog starts to whimper because it senses you panicking. The inconvenience at McDonalds was just bad luck, still, I bet it was the best shit you've taken in a while.

[Masaii]

Yeah always happens. Murpheys law.

You couldve taken a shit 40 minutes ago but if ur with a chick you damn well know your colon is being a scumbag purely for its own lols.

[El Muffin]

One time I took a shit in the woods and wiped my ass with newspaper stolen from my next door neighbors driveway

True story

I turned around n prodded my turds with a stick

I had no other alternative

Long story

[Batty]

shitting at McDonald's mere seconds after a foreigner bombed it out tho....

You must've done some dastardly deeds in your past lives to deserve this fate.

[Badweather]

shitting at McDonald's mere seconds after a foreigner bombed it out tho....

You must've done some dastardly deeds in your past lives to deserve this fate.

I was thinking the same thing. Saturday morning I fell into a cantered manhole cover. Up to my knee in mystery water. Smh. I'm paying for something.

[big baby]

Well, it's not that it's more obstacles. You're just panicking so you notice these things more, it's called observational awareness, in which the user usually goes through a series of things but only is aware when the situation has a high sense of urgency or priority. These events usually happen but since your priority is second to none anything that happens will be considered a nuisance.

[Witty]

I rarely need to shit this bad...i dunno why, I can just keep it in until I have the time to go and it usually isnt difficult to do so.

I have regularly scheduled poop breaks, I go at the same time every day...u should try it.

[Batty]

When you look at Masaii's avatar in the context of this thread, it makes sense.

[CopyPat]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-wwWMkkp5g

Lil Dicky, the illest ever, sums it up perfectly

[Neighbor]

The shit has taken over

[El Muffin]

Lol @ lil dicky

Parts of that was raw af tbh

[Neighbor]

Lil Dicky da gawd

[uh-oh]

keep mcdonalds bags in your car

shit in bag, take napkins out FIRST. use those for toilet paper

launch bag out on freeway

[El Muffin]

How do you shit inside a bag whilst in a car?

Dsnt seem like a smart thing to do

[Strikta]

In traffic it can be done.

[El Muffin]

Lol.