vividlyvague

[gitto138]

Yo ive never been to heaven my self, i prefer my gelatine setting level on a beveled shelf, my submachine shells give submarines hell, like eleven queen elves, i have a clean record compared to ur 17-12, ill never need help, just listen to the melody of my enemys yelp, the pea shooter, you couldn't shoot a bb if ya was a real trooper, no rumour but ill maneuver this steal ruler and steal tumour, jus thought id give cancer a dream boudoir, a party pooper ive had a dream like Martin Luther, the past the future, mask the humour, you think ur a mass producer, no u just an ass abuser, a placid mover, sneakin round the block like a masked intruder, not like a rat in sewer that's over reacting dude, ill procrastinate and leave ur ass in Bermuda

[Kin]

Oooo shit...surprised me wit' thiz one....You gotta make that shit easier on the eyez tho' an seperate the lines so it's not all in a paragraph....

setting level on a beveled shelf, my submachine shells give submarines hell
DOPE

ill never need help, just listen to the melody of my enemys yelp
cool


So you got the rhymes down....juz gotta take out a few of the random ones that throw off the content...like Queen Elves....haha if you made that work that's one thing but that was juz somethin' random that threw me off

But you nice wit' finding harder words to rhyme...no doubt

Good shit

[gitto138]

This was for a cypher t diss mcee above haha, random shit,, thanks for feed tho

[ribbit]

Dont know wasnt feeling it i guess the way u wrote it it deffo felt more like a cypher flo verse just wasnt clean enuff for an open mic it wasnt well thot out and it needed to be edited to fuck to standout as an outstanding verse there were parts where the flow felt dope but it lacked substance and it didnt captivate me as the reader still like u said it was meant for cypher section so i would love to c u post somdthing uve had more time to put effort and thot into it