Week 1: Pent uP vs. Echo -- PENT UP WINS BY NS

[Adonis]

Verses will be due Thursday Oct. 2nd at 11:59 p.m. Western / 2:59 Am Eastern / 7:59AM UK. There are no Extensions. No Exceptions.

Verses must be a minimum of 10 Lines and maximum of 48 Lines or 650 words unless agreed upon by both competitors.

Votes will be due Sundays at 11:59 p.m. Western / 2:59 Am Eastern / 7:59AM UK .

View Other Rules Here (http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=96884)

Goodluck

Pent uP Echo


Topic:

http://i.imgur.com/llgHGRG.jpg

[Pent uP]

I had a check in, here you go alias person

[Echo]

Very well..

[Pent uP]

Let me get on my soap box for a minute.
Shout outs to uh-oh - I wrote this to Sleep Walking.
Not so much for rhythm but that vibe man...this shit is beautiful

check me out.

Waterworld
http://i.imgur.com/llgHGRG.jpg

As a kid I swung from the tire swing until it was tiring.
I'd gaze at portrait landscapes while the breeze would inspire me.
I was rooted in the feeling when watching the grass pass underneath,
but never felt grounded as I ran passed summer eves.
This backyard homed my imagination and freedom
while opening up fantasy places where we'd run.
A nursery of innocence blended with beauty and nature
that allowed the mind to peruse the universe, moon and creators.
Here, friendships gained decorative scratches and cuts
without acknowledging that growing up was rather abrupt.
While our bones mended and turned more solid than ever,
the place and the tire swing grew to become a squandered endeavor.
- But every now and then - After a rain or a storm
I would revisit its afterglow for my brain to adorn.
Life is just a set of feelings that society reflects
like the bottom of a sneaker to a puddle when violently upset.
The summer is dry and hot, slow and relaxed -
like the swing creaking with the breeze flowing to match.
Autumn is serendipitous and usually too soon gone,
but it teaches us to remember the beauty and move on.
Winter is too long, and remains a lesson in itself:
the warmth we're forced to release keeps our pessimism checked.
Lastly, spring showers are about growth and rebuilding.
I wish I could say it was about attitude and forwardly thinking -
But its not. It's about overcoming, overrunning, and staying dry.
It's about finding a cliche in the muckiest, grayest skies.
It's about staying on the rope when your yard is flooded,
because you grew up here before the garden suffered.
Each year our responsibilities grow and resilience changes -
while our feelings reflect another inch of rain sent.

The elements are existential threats here to mark our words,
and our personalities fight to make a rainforest from a water-world.

[Adonis]

Pent uP I read it so I figure I should say my short thoughts. This verse as usual, highly descriptive. The seasons made for a nice touch, and the emotion surrounding this verse was extremely serene. This entire week wasn't all that great regarding top notch verses from the league, but I think this one, copy pat and Certain and nyc were the only real good ones. You connected me to an emotion rather character, something your good at. In the end though, it didn't feel revealing, or lacked a sense of...."wow" or "it's all wrapped up". Good shit though