[Adonis]

Puke wrote a solid verse, although I will say I did not fully fall in love with it. The opening bar in particular didn't hold a good enough rhyme to justify it as the OPENER"" per say. The verse from there quickly picked up in flow, but the story didn't pace as much as I would prefer. It progress, so I can't complain there, but it shifted, didn't flow IMO. I did however, really enjoy the character build up as this is a lost art. I felt a slight connection and understanding of this hobo. All in all, decent verse. Not elite but far from the opposite. Enjoyed the read, but didn't love it. This verse played somewhere in that middle ground.


Schwartz wrote a story tying the topic into the closer which was abnormal considering the other reads. I liked that twist, how you simply told a story and ended with the fire rather then making the fire the focal point. I liked the rhymes, you have a knack for using off rhymes or less common ones then most people. The vocab as always, original and to the point. The flow on the other hand, did have hiccups, but its hard to fault you for that when the word usage and placement are vital and rare yet effective enough to at least have a decent flow. Not say the entire verse' flow was just decent, rather just parts. In the end I felt a connection to the character, so you built a character, the same as your opponent but I felt you did one better in drawing in multiple characters and doing so also with a connection to the reader/


I'm voting

Richard

his verse was more complex in writing and I enjoyed his story and cadence a bit more. Close battle, but I got rich