[Adonis]

Inno - different approach for sure. I always enjoy the shortened line length way more then long bar, and I think you did that well enough. The pace was quick as shit, just a fluid stream of thoughts and images. City surroundings, song by thought. I dig the concept, and even though you have a solid verse, didn't truly execute at a high level but rather average. I enjoyed the verse but I can also say that it fell a bit short in the grand scheme of things.


So Good - the flow in this piece was very good. You set a tone and pace with a seamless rhyme scheme and continued that throughout. But, the message was missing in the end. I get what you were going for, king up high in all his majesty, malnourished peasants below. OK concept, but the execution on said concept was poor. Sure I get what you were going for, but that's because you spelled it out in the closing lines instead of having any semblance of build up or, ironically, majestic tones about it.


voting Inno