Intro
What's up guys, Sharp here with some help from Knucklehead and Allen Knight. Props to Joe Metts for some quality passive aggressiveness. The mag's up before the battles are due but if it's really not enough I usually finish up on Tuesday, so take it up with someone else. Let's get started.
Reviews
Packed Graves vs. Letterman
Close as fuck, both guys brought pretty fresh material which is extra impressive since they've battled a ton lately - sorry guys, matchups were all random and I didn't know about that til after the fact.
Both guys had their highs and lows, voters completely split over who won. It came down to who had seen what flip done before and after a lot of back and forth Letterman came out narrowly on top.
Jilti vs. Potatosacklegend
Fairly one-sided. Potatosack's verse was definitely interesting but didn't have any strong punches. Can't say it wasn't a fun read but it felt like a goofy live verse which isn't too effective. Jilti didn't bring a powerful verse but he seemed to know how much he had to do. His Nissan and PS2 flips were nice but the rest was inconsistent. Jilti easily got the KO.
Greed vs. Mercules
Greed's the wildcard of the NBL this was a nicer showing on his part. Luckily Mercules isn't too rusty so it was a fairly even battle, splitting voters 8-4 in favor of Mercules. Despite being close as far as effective bars, voters found Greed's verse to be inconsistent while Mercules tended to have better misses, which was enough for the W.
En Sabah Nur vs. King Karaoke
Nice battle. Karaoke went in on En, pretty much every bar of his was a solid hit except for the jazz line (but he gets bonus points for mentioning me). En was nice too. His Carol flip wasn't played (rare for a Kar flip) and the packed idea was cool. Overall Kar was the clear winner here.
Hush vs. Sike
Cool battle. Both guys went with a quick verse that wasn't up to what they can do but was still good nontheless. Obnoxious' drop dead gorgeous line was nice while Hush had the bloodclot and AK driveway lines. Hush almost had a clean sweep of votes, as most voters had seen some of the personals Sike used before.
Blanco Bishop vs. Defiant
A little one sided here. Blanco's coming into a style but he can be a bit statementish or played at times. Defiant was more aggressive and dropped one of the better verses I've seen from him in a lil while. That said I haven't seen him drop in a minute so his ceiling could turn out to be higher. Blanco's definitely improving though, his Rosetta line was solid but Def outmatched him here.
Tic Tac vs. Beans
Alright battle. Props to Beans for showing even though he was busy. Tic didn't bring the heat we've seen in the newbie tourney finals but still had a nice verse. Escarole was nice, while Beans had his stepping stones line and a few other ok lines but some played shit (gal flips have been done). Tic won pretty handily but good battle nontheless.
Knucklehead vs. E Tha Real
Nice battle but E's rust caught up with him. Knuck was pretty hard-hitting throughout, Wendy's was dope and Onslaught was nice. E was good but not as effective as Knuck. The Karaoke lines were cool but the jew angle's been done pretty thoroughly. Good read, but the voters unanimously gave it to Knucklehead.
Destroyer vs. Joe Metts
BOTW here easily. Both drops were dope. Destroyer surprised me with how effective the lineman and mett nameflip bars were, but Metts had a little more heat and brought some effective old jokes with him. It was pretty close but every voter thought that Metts was the clear victor.
Strikta vs. Iamtheliquorrandy
I have no idea who Iamtheliquorrandy is but props for showing, that's more than I expected from him. That said he wasn't too strong, a few ideas that were personal but execution was awkward. Strik was nice overall, nothing major but still consistent and good. I was a fan of the Marlboro and Maytag lines. Strik had an easy win but hopefully randy sticks around.
Battle of the week
-Destroyer vs Joe Metts-
Destroyer
I wanted metts on a track in the studio, so I messaged him
told Joe the beat was 'so butter' & dude brought a loaf of bread w/him
i'll bury this fat Baltimore fuck deep - at least 10 feet before I stop now
oriole just eat the fucking dirt like he's sliding into home plate on a pop out
u should play football & not rhyme, because when you try? sad.
dude weighs three hundred pounds and we still can't get a good line man?
I know I'm beating a fat horse, I don't want to go out of bounds
I'll chill with the fat jokes now... it's not my fault... I got lots... pounds and pounds...
u wanna throw hands? you're better off going to war with guns
I mean, hell metts, I'd still beat ur head in if u were wearing more than one
ur skills are average at best, u need to let ur shit rest
let me be Frank, so I can honestly say 'bro, u need to quit text.'
Joe Metts
I'm fat, you're old.
Look.
The weather makes this man chatty. The Beretta makes my hands happy
when this nigga hears a pap pap, it ain't his kid's kids looking for their granddaddy
I bet you tan badly but this heat'll leave ya face charred, nigga u ain't hard
the only time you go to war is when you and your grandkids flip over the same card
handle him quick. one punch to his eye'll leave it all damaged and split
..and he'll be leaving with his site in the hands of God like he was namix and shit
swaying every battle. this nigga more frail the the coldest december
how you sound like a broken record but only ever broke the one for oldest member
I don't do them old people tricks n nothing fun is gonna happen instead
so when I say something shiny is behind ya ears. I got the gun to the back of ya head
I'm a legend homie. If you ever thought u'd beat me you a damn fool
my text career is this whole leagues Fantasy
..so no matter who u face next week it's nothing to me but a FanDuel
Interview with Alvin Karpis
Alright, Sharp here with the defending NBL Champ, Alvin Karpis. What's up bro?
Not shit man, busy as usual
Let's get straight to business. Who are you watching right now as potential competition? Anyone you just wanna battle?
Always gotta watch out for karaoke, orc etc, but it's great to see some heads that rarely battle like hush, metts, strikta, etc. AK and swerve are there as well, might be missing some
What do you think your odds are of a repeat title this season?
HA honestly not great, I just hope I can show every week
What would you like to see happen differently this season?
I hope week 1set the tone for the season, if so everything should run smooth. Strikta was kinda right when he said mags will keep heads interested however people still need to acknowledge them so it would be nice to have a weekly mag. Maybe even add a cypher or pic roast, those types of things keep the league active imo
What do you think of your opponent this week, Knucklehead, and how do you think you'll do against him?
Knuck is kinda underrated in my eyes, he can bring some dope lines, I think consistency might be his downfall though, it should be a cool battle
Thanks for doing this interview, I'll give you the last word for shoutouts/callouts/etc.
Shoutout to everyone who recorded a video, fuckin weirdos haha
Top Punches
-In no particular order-
Joe Metts vs Destroyer
I bet you tan badly but this heat'll leave ya face charred, nigga u ain't hard
the only time you go to war is when you and your grandkids flip over the same card
Destroyer vs Joe Metts
i'll bury this fat Baltimore fuck deep - at least 10 feet before I stop now
oriole just eat the fucking dirt like he's sliding into home plate on a pop out
Packed Graves vs Letterman
i dish out beatings, so fuck what the enemy think
if Lettermans Set on winning this, then I'm the tazmanian devil with an energy drink
Defiant vs Blanco Bishop
Need a ghostwriter to not lose to me again, u ain't a threat your done
So it's ironic you go for broke, when it's the same thing your wife done when she met u son
Obnoxious vs Hush
I'm the handsome type, while bitches say you're a sore on the eyes,
Compared to you?
… I'm drop dead gorgeous while your corpse wouldn't attract vultures or flies.
King Karaoke vs En Sabah Nur aka Apocalypse
Dude's awkward and lame, he never touches pretty hoes
This 'Lypse is barely noticeable like the one in Hush's videos
Strikta vs Iamtheliquorrandy
In my drunken state I could take ya girl just to show she's a whore, bruh
Maytag da bitch on top of a washer & watch her mouth open for a load like its door does
Mike Wrecka vs Muff
Ur whole persona is full of lies, god damn it's pitiful
after closer inspection, ur bull don't stand up, like the one in seadads video
Jilti vs Potatosacklegend
come up missing while his whole family tries to search for this fucken bum
they'll even send ur nephew & Nissan Quest to find ya body in the trunk of one
Knucklehead vs E Tha Real
Let's talk punches.. no one feels urs, mine are on top list reports
'Cus Wendy's hit ya stomach.. NC'll get more excited than they did for Orc's