soulstice: probably sounding like a broken record here, but I gotta echo the previous sentiments here. The writing itself was great, and the structure of exploring different layers of the world through different animal guides was a wonderful approach, very reminiscent of archetypical fantasy worlds. But like everyone else, I really couldn't connect the verse to the picture at all, which gives it an air of being unfair since you (seemingly) shirked the constraint of the given topic. There were loose, veiled connections no doubt, but those came off as tacked on; they looked like afterthoughts.
Uh-oh: the characterization was entertaining and fun. the verse dipped its toes in some social commentary, but no real insight was laid out really. All in all, it was enjoyable, but it felt like a cliff's notes version to me - it was such a brisk journey through this character and his world and how it carved him into who he was, it was hard for me to come away with much of a feeling or anything. I just didn't get much from it, other than the pure enjoyment from reading it (which is a fundamental aspect of good writing that shouldn't be trivialized).
Vote: Soulstice had the better writing no doubt here, but in the name of being fair, I just can't bring myself to give him the vote simply off the fact that it was so disconnected from the picture. So I vote for Uh-oh.
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You should be water
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