View Single Post
Old 06-12-2013, 01:09 AM   #11
IamBenT
SuPreaM Lyricyst
 
IamBenT's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: San Antonio, TX
Posts: 704
Battle Record: 9-6



Rep Power: 412355
IamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant futureIamBenT has a brilliant future
Default

Great battle between two legit heavy weights, great to see a Witty verse after soo long.

Quotes

Mike:

Whole intro read smooth, was a great beginning, and so superbly written.

that's part of plan/
to expand, towards the horizon, seeking, searching,
- lack of an article between of and plan threw me but i get it

Your scheme through most of this is so impeccable, even in places where
it seems it will fall off, you have internals to hold it up without too much forcing,
this is an enviable verse bro

word gets back to the people, they feel calm inside,
they have a bigger population, to push on, survive/
raise an army of their own, the enemy will be here soon,
plan to defend by launching harpoons from hot air balloons/

-love the attention to detail and the effortless imagery and rhyme coalescing to form the tragedy that
hits its high note at the end, and the cyclical destruction that had them surviving in the first place.


------------------------------------------

Witty:

Demons soar with ease above the stormy seas
Immortal beasts here to torture, contort and freeze
Earth's core until she lays dormant ever more...deceased

- So cool and fun to read, reminds me a bit of Nigma with the wicked trademark flow

Your story progression is tried and true, a veteran touch thats unmistakable, and you build this all
with great details very nicely

The people try to resist, but they're weak and exposed
Humanity weeps as the scarlet sky glows deep as a rose
- getting a bit vague here, would have liked a more specific zeroing in, simile was cool but could have been made stronger?? maybe

I went back and forth with this one. Although I felt that Witty showed amazing technical prowess and told a solid tale, he could have been strengthened by using a bit more specific and active language. Mike's story, although it lacked some of the flash in Witty's verse, was a strong display of classic storytelling in a fantastic environment with a resonating moral, and verses like that strike me a bit stronger.

Vote -MikeWrecka

Great battle, fellows.
__________________
A.bove T.he R.est
IamBenT|Genocide|MikeWrecka|Objective|Vulgar|Witty |Rawn MacDon
IamBenT is offline