Scrypt

[Immolate]

the more sober i get, the meaner i become. Nobody knows me here, so when I act short and grumpy, they don't know I'm just sober.

so last night i stayed up drinking with the sun, asking, "what happened to my my heart"

i guess my dad died, started drinking too hard. & the drugs i got make me feel better. but it's not compatible with keeping my life together, and adulting. yet it keeps me alive. what do?


and mom's been thinking too hard, grieving til dark....maybe that's why i drink so much, stumble from the park to the yard & always pass up a good girl for a broken bitch with a golden heart

uhmm, Joe passed me the rum. I just mixed it with vodka

my belly said "nah son", so i vomit in a goblet. kitchen sink. had to move the food catch. but even if i didnt, could've fed it to the dog. she's eaten my puke a few times. i really don't want that at all, but at that pint...as if i could move.


start slurring some nonsense

like "i coulda had a son! but i aborted!"

"i think she woulda been a good mum!

..if we got off all the drugs & out the horror shit"

& i didn't mind the whoring shit.

some nights i get drunk & make a fortune

some nights she owes me one & i pay 10 years of tears for 1 abortion

& tomorrow, there's some court shit & some courtship with Miss Misery @ the Holocene are u kiddin me

but i met courtney at the cashier's counter, i had 3 bottles of whiskey, 2 pints of vodka, & mixed drinks & she smiled & said "where's the party at? i wanna go to it"

& i'm riding in a hearse but i'm gonna go for it


happy new years

[uh-oh]

9/10