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Old 04-21-2014, 03:24 AM   #1
Certain
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Default Week 9 contender match: 3. zygote (6-2) vs. 4. Frank (6-2) \\ zygote wins via no-show


Season 3




The Basics | Read the full rules here.

Verses are due Friday at 11:59 p.m. PT. THERE ARE NO EXTENSIONS.

Votes are due Sunday at 11:59 p.m. PT.

Verses may not exceed 48 lines or 650 words unless agreed upon by the opponent.

Voting on three battles is required. If you win and don't vote, you will receive a loss instead. If you lose and don't vote, you will receive a one-week suspension. Please post links to your three votes in this thread.


Topic


“Let It Slide”


Good luck, @Frank and @zygote.
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Old 04-21-2014, 03:45 AM   #2
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Round 5

FIGHT
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Old 04-21-2014, 07:24 PM   #3
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BATTLE RAP 10
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Old 04-22-2014, 03:16 AM   #4
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BASEBALL SPORT: LET IT SLIDE TO HOMEBASE TO WIN THE GAME.

The pitcher nods twice. Adjusting his cap.
He lets a slider go, the kind of throw that’ll twist you up in your tracks.
Chearleaders are near, jumping up jacks.
The drummerman plays - rumtumtumbraat! rumtumtumbraat!
Wall to wall in the stadium atrium all customers packed,
Guzzling snacks, peanuts and wieners – munching on franks.
The buzzing hum of their chat sounds like some ancient tongue in a chant.
They all hush for the champ.
The Yucatan Slugger is back, fresh from his ban to play in his one hundredth match.
As he appears cheers become a rumbling clap,
Commentators stumbling - jumbling facts.
Yucatan emerges from the shadows, half blubber- half fat.
He spits his gum out the back. Missing a tooth, substance abuse and misuse of drugs will do that.
He walks out to the mound with his foot touching the bat.
Yucatan steps up to the slab.
Bouncing up and down his number one bat,
the lucky homerunner all rugged and wrapped, scotch tape covers the patch where he filled up a crack.
He rubs it for luck, Tap, Tap, rub and then Tap.
The pitcher let’s fly a wide chaser, Yucatan tried to slug at the trap,
STRIKE ONE! His timing is wrong, all dumb out of whack.
The pitcher lets another slider go,
STRIKE TWO! This motherfucker tried to bunt it? What’s up with that?
A young punk in the back tells his buddies – “This guy’s done it. He’s had.”
“Yeah he’s washed up and lost. Someone toss that dumbass a map.”
Yucatan burps, then yawns, he’s all mucked up with gas.
The Physio’s out waiting for the big lug to collapse.
The coach leaves the dugout and snaps, all - Fuck you Yucatan, Fuck this and Fuck that!
Yucatan has one last ultimate chance.
The pitcher winds up – he throws another slider, but this time it thumps into the bat with a thunderous CRACK!
A highball, wide left with the sun at its back,
The outfielder rounds nearer and lifts up his glove for the catch…
but he muffs it! No catch! The ball pops out like a juggling act.
Youths watch with rub on tats and colorful hats,
The elderly watch too, mumbling, swearing like an old lovers spat.
Yucatan drops his bat, a tumbling dash as he runs for the gap,
Rounding base one in under a flash,
Rounding base two before the ball was picked up off the grass,
Hitting base three as the ball was dispatched, a brilliant turn as he spun on the bag,
He feels like he’s under attack and his lungs will collapse,
but Yucatan remembers when he was young and in love with the track.
Just running so fast. In the press box – journalists stop to type up on the tops in their laps,
While outside photographers watch - flabbergusted gobsmacked,
For those that aren’t screaming or cheering, all others gasp, watching stumped and aghast.
The Yucatan slugger is back.
Homeplate is in sight, can he make it? He might! It will be done in a snap.
The Catcher is waiting, all bunched up and camped.
The ball arrives as Yucatan slides, kicking up muck as they clash, dust covers the mat.
Then he hears the cry that will validate his life. SAFE!
THE SLUGGER IS BACK!

Last edited by zygote; 04-23-2014 at 02:43 PM.
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Old 04-23-2014, 07:43 PM   #5
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What ever happened to your "let it be" verse fagbot

Funny shit.

Go fuck yourself.

Cricket watching faggot
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Last edited by Frank; 04-23-2014 at 07:48 PM.
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Old 04-26-2014, 03:03 AM   #6
Certain
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@Frank, you have five minutes from now to post a verse.

There's your extension.
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Old 04-26-2014, 03:04 AM   #7
Frank
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- AOWL Season 6
- AOWL Season 10

Rep Power: 3853344
Frank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant futureFrank has a brilliant future
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I need until 5 Eastern Time tomorrow

@Zyg
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Old 04-26-2014, 03:06 AM   #8
Certain
Mad fucking dangerous.
 
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12,072
Battle Record: 40-19


Champed
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- Art of Writing League (2x)

Rep Power: 85899403
Certain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond repute
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frank View Post
I need until 5 Eastern Time tomorrow

@Zyg
No. This thread closes at 3:09 a.m. ET.
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