i Just Registered just riffing

[Pharaohs Army]

,

[gitto138]

Lot bark with no bite, you should focus on extensions to detail in a smooth rhythmic structure, so as t fall off yo tongue, just seem very bland and lacking substance, bits if word play here n there,, ok for an introduction i suppose, look forward to more drops,

[JESODIST]

Easy on the guy he just started, What the fuck? We are trying to attract writers not humiliate their work, Give the guy a break he'll surprise you if you just come at him good.
He had some good multies on this piece. Not bad for a first post. Go check other people's posts too and give feedback.

[Pharaohs Army]

Nice community. Cool lyrics.

[Zen]

Don't listen to gitto. This guy just wrote a piece that started off with "vaginal sauna". I know...

This wasn't great. Wasn't really good either honestly, but you wrote it quick so I didn't enter the thread expecting something mind blowing. Glad you, Jeso, and UnbornBuddha made your way here because you seem like you'll stay active with feed and drops. I will read your next piece.

[gitto138]

@Zen how can any one listen to gitto on this TEXT site, go skype some Arabic prostitute, ya big hairy vaginal sauna.. It was an honest opinion Pharo wit potential i cant compare my self to Zen or any of the other top writers but, in tryin lol,, keep writing dude,

[dull boy]

I sorta feel like all these new members are one person.

[gitto138]

I am one person pmsl

[big baby]

tbh i think gittos pretty funny in a subtle way but is new so is dubbed as a bish fag, but thatll ease over if he doesnt get overwhelmed which could happen if i attacked him but he cute with lil numbers in his name lmao!!!!

losah..jk

but srs losah

anyway da piece!

pretty good! i actually have more problems with dull boys commentary than gitto .. of course it is harsh, but the writer has to make what he accepts and what he doesnt accept..if someone horrible leaves you pretty brutal feed, do you accept it like 'yeah that guys totally write' but if shakespeare or bb comes in and gives you brutal honest feed, would yo accept it, or write it off? im about 95% sure that the author has read gittos work and made his own decision as to write it off or accept it...its natural. @Zen

you have a grasp on writing, but you should invoke more emotion without feeling awkward. some lines were okay, others were just filler. if you're going to separate lines, then they should have their own tale of the tape. good job

[dead man]

Originally Posted by dull boy

I sorta feel like all these new members are one person.

[Pharaohs Army]

my line about "3 of the members of the crew are myself", or something, is a joke about personality disorders. I assure you i am one person though, with one membership.

[Witty]

Originally Posted by dull boy

I sorta feel like all these new members are one person.

I think so too....we get one new member every three months, if that, and suddenly we get a bunch of names all registered at roughly the same time.

Something strange is occuring in the hundred acre wood.

Where Christopher Robbin plays.

[Zen]

Originally Posted by big baby

tbh i think gittos pretty funny in a subtle way but is new so is dubbed as a bish fag, but thatll ease over if he doesnt get overwhelmed which could happen if i attacked him but he cute with lil numbers in his name lmao!!!!

losah..jk

but srs losah

anyway da piece!

pretty good! i actually have more problems with dull boys commentary than gitto .. of course it is harsh, but the writer has to make what he accepts and what he doesnt accept..if someone horrible leaves you pretty brutal feed, do you accept it like 'yeah that guys totally write' but if shakespeare or bb comes in and gives you brutal honest feed, would yo accept it, or write it off? im about 95% sure that the author has read gittos work and made his own decision as to write it off or accept it...its natural. @Zen

you have a grasp on writing, but you should invoke more emotion without feeling awkward. some lines were okay, others were just filler. if you're going to separate lines, then they should have their own tale of the tape. good job

No happy birthday, Zen?

That's it fucka we fist fighting.

[big baby]

Originally Posted by Witty

I think so too....we get one new member every three months, if that, and suddenly we get a bunch of names all registered at roughly the same time.

Something strange is occuring in the hundred acre wood.

Where Christopher Robbin plays.

if paid FUCKA attendchin wud !+ zygote BROUGHT NEW MEMBERS OVA HEA FUCKA STUPID AAS FOX OH LEMME AGREE WITH DB TEHEE NO FEED TEHE! Fuck u and zen stupid fucks

[Witty]

Originally Posted by big baby

if paid FUCKA attendchin wud !+ zygote BROUGHT NEW MEMBERS OVA HEA FUCKA STUPID AAS FOX OH LEMME AGREE WITH DB TEHEE NO FEED TEHE! Fuck u and zen stupid fucks

:(

[gitto138]

You cant hit a baby