08-02-2018, 07:32 AM | #1 | |||||||
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 3,986
Battle Record: 11-6
Rep Power: 5633913 |
1-2 PUNCH WEEK 7 MAG: THE COMEBACK EDITION
Welcome to the 1-2 Punch Mag Introduction Whats up fellas, we're back for another week of the 1-2 Punch League and this is DEFINITELY the beginning of a recovery. Last week I admit I dropped a pretty boring mag, and I apologize. However, there were a high number of no shows last week which almost drove me to not dropping a mag this week. Regardless, I usually keep to my word and here I am again ready to deliver something a bit unique this week - and something different for the people. I'm looking forward to some new sign ups and dope bars, as well as starting up the LR again next week. We have some dope sign ups for next weeks LR so far, and I'm eager to see how people do. And now... Battle Reviews LIGHTNING ROUND: Destroyer (4-1) vs. Flow (3-3) Well this was a one sided battle from the very beginning, the people weren't really feeling Destroyers punch which was "Flow on a kanvas like a lesbian haircut.....". I think this is one of those lines that someone decides to drop as sort of a joke like "tehehehe let me drop some complete bullshit and see if people are stupid enough to actually vote for it." Well Des, it didn't work this time. I'll admit, it has worked for you brilliantly in many of your other battles this season but nobody fell for it this time. Flow on the other hand had a nice personal against Des, and the crowd reacted accordingly. I personally feel bad about dissing someones hardships like that but I cant lie, it was a good punch man. Flow one this in a blowout. Props. LIGHTNING ROUND: Blue Bayou (5-1) vs. Killing Spree (2-2) Blue came with his usual wordplay induced punch and dropped a wordplay that nobody has apparently seen before. "Pisan"..........peas on.......pee sign......pee's on.......ugh. I'm personally growing really tired of wordplay as a whole, and its honestly something that is becoming a thing of the past. Everyone was getting hate the past couple years for trying to incorporate gunbars and similes into their verses, and now it seems like the trend has changed. More people are adopted that style, and more and more are doing away with the wordplay bars; with the exception of a few. Nonetheless, Blue's bar here was definitely original and worded good - making the impact hit with solidity and creampied his opponent. Spree had a punch that was worded poorly due to ummmmm time restraints I guess? Nah, Killing Spree....bro.....lack of time is not a scapegoat for you anymore, you're given way more than enough time to finish verses, yet alone punches....extensions for you should be fuckin forbidden at this point tbfh. Your bar was something about a seersucker which I have no idea wtf that is, then you said you're blowing brains on cotton sheets. Maybe this could have been nice with cleaner wording/execution but it fell up short buddy. No hate but the fans liked Blue's bar more. Blue WON! LIGHTNING ROUND: Infiltrate (2-1) vs. Aero (0-1) Idk man, I'm beginning to take things a bit personal when dope battlers drop really weak punches in a 1-2 battle. This battle was a pure example of that imo. Aero had a punch about moving without a basketball like Ray Allen, and had to follow up with it in his sig with a Ray Allen gif smh. I hope this is not a new trend thats going on. I'm mad at Aero because I know he's dope and can definitely drop better, so things like this get me heated sometimes. Infiltrate is another one whos got the sauce but didn't drop anything special in this battle. AND HE REQUESTED TO BATTLE AERO!!! Like come on fam, if you request somebody, it should mean you have a hot bar lined up for the guy....not some dog shit puddlepunch out of lake shitty kaka. Aero won this by a slim margin here. LIGHTNING ROUND: BodySnatcher (2-2) vs. Defiant (0-3) Defiant the no show goddess had a pretty awful line here about forklifts and 3 other people lol like what? Not sure what on earth you were aiming for here bro, but it didn't turn out well and oh guess what you also no showed your reg battle this week so kiss my ass pussy you're done for the season. Body had a pretty solid punch here that the crowd reacted well to. "get on my knees with the pistol in my hands and make cute remarks about your face". Yeah dope bar bra bra, it got you the win and helped solidify your spot in the contenders, props. LIGHTNING ROUND: Diablo (2-0) vs. Jabari Black (3-2) ISSA DRAW! Yeah this battle was set sort of last minute because Lars is impatient and demanding as all hell and just couldnt wait for the next weeks LR. I'm surprising this got as many votes as it did, but being because it was set up way too late in the day, we werent able to generate enough votes which caused this to end in a draw. Both of these guys had good lines and the votes definitely showed it. Diablo had a Marvin the Martian line that seemed to resonate well with the crowd, and Jabari had a Sonic line that was a solid hit as well and really gave voters a run for their money. Props to both of you, and maybe you'll see each other again. Flow (4-3) vs. Amen (2-1) This battle really made me laugh lol LOL. Not because Flow destroyed Amen, or Amen destroyed Flow, but because Amen got mad that someone dissed his wife again lmao 3 times in 4 weeks or something like that. And the worst part is that Flow's bar wasnt really even a diss on the wife, it was more of the mocking the whole underarmour thing lol. Flows bar ended up getting praised, while Amen had a bar about Flow helping Lars get a job.......NEWSFLASH IDIOT LMAO IT WAS MMLP WHO GOT SRAL A JOB, NOT FLOW....smh, just because they're all brits and they all look like idiots and talk like idiots doesnt mean they are all the same person. Regardless of how Amen thought the bar would do, the people were not feeling it and Flow ended up getting the win. Props. Ryno (0-0) vs. Viper (0-0) This battle was decent imo, both of these guys are definitely alias' and I have my suspicions on who they are but I cant pinpoint it. Ryno had a punch about Dodge Viper which definitely had potential to be a great bar, but it ended up not having the amount of impact it should have. Viper had a pretty dated flip that was suspicious for being a bite but nobody could come up with any evidence or whatever. I think its a played concept for sure, but I dont think its a bite. The line was decent overall. Viper won it here, but Ryno has good potential. Props guys. Jabari Black (3-2) vs. Plot (3-2) I was personally really excited for this battle because I think both of these guys have been doing phenomenal so far this season, and the winner could have been anyones call really. Plot has been surprising folks week in and week out with some nice bars and concepts that make you say "owwie". Jabari has been dropping good bars all season, definitely in the Top 5 bracket compared to the bullshit a lot of other people have been dropping. JB had a good line here about doing Plots hair at a beauty salon with the heat under the dimmadome, and Plot had a line about a Lunar eclipse that didn't quite get the recognition he was hoping for. JB won this, props to both. Contenders Match: Blue Bayou (6-1) vs. Destroyer (4-2) This was a pretty cool battle according to the people who voted. I personally either didnt like the bars or didnt understand them so I couldnt give my own 411 on it. Blue had a bar about Nissan Armadas docking onto a cruise ship and having a jolly old time. Des had a bar about letting bygones be bygones and not telling them things wistfully, must be extremely rude to bygones or else. Not too many people voted on this and I'm 200% sure I could guess why, but we'll leave it alone for now and just mention the fact that it was a close one but Blue edged it out at the end. Blue now faces Cashius in what can be the battle of the season thus far, definitely excited for that one. Champ Match: bleak (5-0) vs. Cashius (4-1) bleak has had a great run thus far in the 1-2 and had shown tremendous amounts of growth and elevation. Props to the homie bleak for improving the way he did, and turning a lot of heads like a phat ass walking by. Now this battle was definnitely gonna be some wishful thinking for bleak to win it against Cash, and thats exactly how it went. Cashius ended up coming out with a skunk on bleak 10-0, and dropped a hot bar to seal that. bleak also had a cool bar but it was certainly outdone by Cash's. Props to both but we have a new champ. Congrats Cashius! Predictions Allen Knight (1-0) vs. Ryno (0-1) Allen was no showed last week by that pussy ghosting fagit Useless, and came up with the NS win. I bet money he would have logged into drop a bar against someone like Ryno, Viper or Em Kay Gee but he saw he was against someone he couldn’t beat and he flaked. Came back last minute on Sunday night like “omg sorry guys I had no idea this was happening!” Stfu. Ryno is coming off a loss last week, and it looking to improve his record to 1-1 but might have trouble getting the W this week. Allen is the big favorite here so I’m guessing he’ll take it. Allen Knight 75/25 Em Kay Gee (1-0) vs. Viper (1-0) EKG is also coming off a NS victory last week, and is eager to claim a real win for himself. Not sure who he is but he’s definitely cool in my books because he’s active and he votes. Good job bro. Viper had a decent win last week against Ryno, but I’m guessing it’ll be a lot closer this week than last. I’m gonna go with EKG here because I think he has some surprises for us. Em Kay Gee 55/45 Killing Spree (3-3) vs. Twodrop (3-3) This has potential to be a pretty cool battle. Some weird shit happened last week where Twodrop had a complete breakdown and went crazy being gay in a bunch of battles and threads smh. I personally like Twodrop and think he’s a cool and funny dude, but leave the lame stuff outside of battles my man. Killing is coming off a NS win and is hoping to improve to 4-3 and inch himself closer to a Contenders Match. This is gonna be close and can be anyone’s call. KS has better concepts, but Twodrop has better wording and execution. I’m gonna go with Twodrop in a slight toss. Twodrop 55/45 Plot (3-3) vs. DynamiCz (2-2) I like the sound of this match up right here. Both of these guys have been doing great this season and never seem to disappoint too often. Plot has some making up to do for dropping a below average bar last week which caused for a loss, and DynamiCz is looking to take a clean win to improve his hopes for a Contenders shot. Could be anyone’s game because DynamiCz is dope but Plot is a 1-2 specialist. DynamiCz 60/40 Chyeahhh!!! (4-2) vs. Destroyer (4-3) This battle is already in progress, both competitors have dropped their bars and votes are rolling in....slowly, but surely. I’d like to give more of a prediction here but I won’t want to sway any votes, although it does look like Des is currently in the lead. Destroyer 60/40 DMS (3-0) vs. Barcotic (3-2) This is another battle that’s already in progress. I like DMS a lot, I feel like he’s a lighter version of Lenox without all the drama and depression issues. I feel bad for Lenox because he’s a cool kid and has potential to be a good writer but he has to deal with inner demons first before he can blossom into the next Strikta. Barc is a top tier cat who is looking for some vengeance in the league and is aiming for a shot in the Contenders. Well guess what fellas, the winner of this battle will definitely see themselves in next weeks Contenders Match. Barcotic 65/35 bleak (5-1) vs. Jabari Black (4-2) This right here is my pick for a low key battle of the week, and I’m eager to see what both of these guys can bring to the table. Bleak is coming off a loss in the champ match against our new raining champion Cashius, and I’m sure bleak is mad and wants to get another shot soon. Jabari is gunning for the title as well, dropping consistent dopeness in his battles and always coming clutch with good votes and integrity. JB has also had a rather tough schedule this season and I believe that’s helped him improve his game for the better. This can be close but I’m going with JB here. Jabari Black 60/40 Contenders Match: Flow (5-3) vs. BodySnatcher (4-2) Here is another dope battle for the week, Flow has been dropping some fireeee lately and is seeming like he’s coming for peoples heads out here! Body is definitely looking for a championship appearance and wants to get a 1-2 accomplishment under his belt. This is really anyone’s call and I predict it’ll go down to a narrow margin of votes. I’m calling it an even toss up a 50/50 Champ Match: Cashius (5-1) vs. Blue Bayou (7-1) Now this is shaping up to be battle of the season so far. These guys met once already in the beginning of the season and Blue ended up snagging the W in a hard fought matchup. Cashius has been on his game for a good minute now, and he’s gonna be hard to beat. Blue definitely has what it takes to defeat Cash but the question is “what kind of line will he drop?” Going to be tough here but I’m gonna day Cashius takes it. Cashius 55/45 Throwback Thursday Quote:
Quote:
http://www.netcees.org/showthread.ph...light=Barcotic Top 5 Top 5 (Punches of the Week) Number 5 I'll bodyslam ur corpse fgt. b's got the Pumphandle/this guy is a fairy. showing you true POWER.bombs hit'n ur crib got u in a Fireman's Carry - bleak Number 4 Since this jive turkey fight dirty, its by any means if Jabari is startin’ broom to the back of Black head leave him lookin like Marvin The Martian - Diablo Number 3 Old age left you witta shrivelled dick - feel for who you married She hasnt pulled something that small an limp out of her since she miscarried - Flow Number 2 The toolie get drawn...put it under ya chin then I’m shooting you, son/ Headshot! I’ll sit you down with the heat under the dome like beauty salons/ - Jabari Black Number 1 Yo, in that pic battle... ...we seen them man boobs, release the damn spoon...that shit is the worst Guarantee all your clothes fit tight as shit...but you still a dude who be ‘Swimmin’ in shirts’ - Cashius Top 6 Battler Rankings (Currently Signed In) 6. bleak - bleak gets the number 6 spot this week due to getting dethrowned from the champions circle and as per Netcees tradition, he gets knocked down a few ranking spots. bleak has done fantastic so far this season and has shocked many people, but he has to keep up that momentum if he wants to see a champ appearance again. Props bleak! 5. Flow - Flow gets the number 5 spot because he’s been pretty damn consistent these past few weeks and has gotten himself a Contenders Match with some nice wins under his belt. He’s definitely a force to be reckoned with right now and people need not sleep on the Brit. 4. BodySnatcher - Body comes up at Number 4 because I feel he low key has the potential to champ this entire season. He’s a sleeper in the league and has a style that you have to fuck with in order to enjoy. Personally I think he’s dope and he’s done enough to get himself into the contenders Match. Props on earning the spot bro. 3. Jabari Black - Jabari is one of my favorite text battlers to read right now, hands down. When I go into a JB battle thread I already know I’m gonna end up seeing BARS that I can relate to and make the sour face to. Every so often some of his lines may go over peoples heads, but typically he drops dope and provides us with exciting punches to read and not snooze to. 2. Blue Bayou - Blue is a vet who’s been taking every opportunity possible to improve his overall record and make some appearances in the contender/champ matches. He’s been dropping some consistently nice lines throughout the weeks, especially in the LR. He’s been killing the Lightning Round battles hands down and it’s always a pleasure to see him drop bars. Props on the number 2 spot my man. 1. Cashius - Cashius is killing shit right now, in all leagues. He’s proven to be the top contender right now due to the fact he’s already taken out most of the top battlers in the league. Dropping solid personals and fire punches every week, Cashius is the newly crowned champion of the league and it’s gonna be very difficult to take that belt from him. Honorable Mentions: Barcotic, DynamiCz, DMS, Destroyer Letters from big baby Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Outro I actually wanted to do a lot more for this mag but this week has been very hectic with a lot of schedule changes and catching up on reports. My biggest thing is that I hate writing mags when it feels like an obligation or something. You guys have to make me WANT to do this shit. No showing in your battles and acting uninterested isn’t going to make me wanna do shit, it’s like if you guys don’t put in the effort, why should I? But it’s whatever, I’m looking at last week as a letdown but I’m hoping we bounce back and get some solid battles posted and revamping the LR again next week. Let’s get it! Last edited by For Battling; 08-02-2018 at 08:15 AM. |
|||||||
08-02-2018, 07:41 AM | #3 |
Bags will be avenged
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 12,622
Battle Record: 85-58
Accomplishments - 50+ Wins
Champed - Gimmick Battle League
- 1-2 Punch League (5x)
- Fight Night LXXIX
- Fight Night 4
- Netcees Battle League (2x)
- NPL Roast
Rep Power: 84181418 |
The hate is palpable
See you soon, lippy |
08-02-2018, 07:44 AM | #4 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 3,986
Battle Record: 11-6
Rep Power: 5633913 |
|
08-02-2018, 07:50 AM | #5 |
The Biggest
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 3,254
Battle Record: 67-32
Accomplishments - Gun Bar King
Champed - Fight Night 3
- Fight Night 10
- Fight Night 12
- Battle Arena League
Rep Power: 85899380 |
Dope mag fella.
|
08-02-2018, 07:56 AM | #6 |
As-salamu alaykum!
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 8,470
Battle Record: 19-8
Champed - 1-2 Punch League Season 6
Rep Power: 0 |
Zelph - you're retarded. Like legit retarded. My bar had nothing to do with flow helping Lars get a job and everything to do with Lars giving Flow bars.
Maybe you shouldn't vote anymore because clearly, you're retarded and can't comprehend basic shit. |
08-02-2018, 07:59 AM | #7 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 4,439
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 37645695 |
Seersucker is a type of thin fabric generally cotton.
Jesus Anyways nice mag |
08-02-2018, 08:00 AM | #8 |
Bags will be avenged
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 12,622
Battle Record: 85-58
Accomplishments - 50+ Wins
Champed - Gimmick Battle League
- 1-2 Punch League (5x)
- Fight Night LXXIX
- Fight Night 4
- Netcees Battle League (2x)
- NPL Roast
Rep Power: 84181418 |
Yeah, you probably know it as theerthucker
|
08-02-2018, 08:08 AM | #9 |
As-salamu alaykum!
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 8,470
Battle Record: 19-8
Champed - 1-2 Punch League Season 6
Rep Power: 0 |
Lmfaoo, Fucking Destroyer, man.
|
08-02-2018, 08:11 AM | #10 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 3,986
Battle Record: 11-6
Rep Power: 5633913 |
Lmao!
|
08-02-2018, 08:16 AM | #11 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 4,439
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 37645695 |
|
08-02-2018, 08:23 AM | #12 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 3,986
Battle Record: 11-6
Rep Power: 5633913 |
|
08-02-2018, 08:23 AM | #13 |
GOAT
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 4,826
Battle Record: 14-17
Champed - Site Diss Competition
- Tag Tournament III
- Lyric Olympics
- Tag Tournament: "Omicron Variant"
Rep Power: 0 |
Great mag. Look forward to working with you on future projects.
__________________
Too Rich IRL to Be Here. I'm Out.
|
08-02-2018, 08:28 AM | #14 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 4,439
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 37645695 |
|
08-02-2018, 08:32 AM | #15 |
Needs no introduction
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Toronto
Posts: 4,494
Battle Record: 29-31
Accomplishments - Hall of Fame
Champed - Survivor Tournament
- Pros vs. Joes
- Key Grand Prix
- Fight Night XX
- NBL Tag Team
- NBL Picture League
- Battle Arena
- Battle Arena Pics
- BA Tag Team (2x)
- 1-2 Punch League (2x)
- BAL Battle Royale
- NPL Roast
Rep Power: 3061965 |
lmao @ "ppl are scared to vote against ppl like barc"
u sir are retarded & clearly dont read any battles other than that cool mag
__________________
Dummies finna die if they coming into mine boastin Twin glocks'll spark. Waterpark; everybody running when the slides open |
08-02-2018, 08:37 AM | #16 |
GOAT
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 4,826
Battle Record: 14-17
Champed - Site Diss Competition
- Tag Tournament III
- Lyric Olympics
- Tag Tournament: "Omicron Variant"
Rep Power: 0 |
I just got that Cashius bar. Lololololol
__________________
Too Rich IRL to Be Here. I'm Out.
|
08-02-2018, 08:38 AM | #17 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 3,986
Battle Record: 11-6
Rep Power: 5633913 |
|
08-02-2018, 08:46 AM | #18 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 4,439
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 37645695 |
Weather permitting maybe I’ll do one
|
08-02-2018, 09:00 AM | #19 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 3,986
Battle Record: 11-6
Rep Power: 5633913 |
Weather permitting
|
08-02-2018, 09:36 AM | #20 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 600
Battle Record: 15-16
Champed - Write Week 9
Rep Power: 9768088 |
Dope mag FB, LOL all us brits do lookalike I guess :|
|
|
|