01-31-2013, 07:51 PM | #1 |
Senior Citizen
Join Date: Aug 1997
Posts: 3,871
Battle Record: 4-3
Rep Power: 0 |
Round 1: 1. E2 vs 20. Yuppi
E2:
My Job: Freshman English Composition Teacher Waking up at the crack of dawn, walking over to campus Locking myself in the lab with a lesson plan in hand... it’s Shitty being a teacher when you’re still going to grad school Desperately trying to enforce and obey the class rules There’s few things more difficult than teaching kids to write Especially when you battle with the issues they fight Like how to find your voice and appeal to the reader These kids ain’t that great, but I ain’t that skilled either I only got experience and time on my side A beard on my face and a stride full of pride So why do I teach? Well, there ain’t a lot to do When you been in college so long they’re all watching you Like “Here’s your Bachelors, here's your Masters Some day you’ll get a PhD—that is, if you don’t crack first” It’s backbreaking work but I need the epinephrine Cause it also breaks my heart to put the F in Freshmen I really don’t make a lot but I guess it pays the bills And my health insurance covers me… just in case I’m ill See, academe is funny, just when you think you’re cunning You come to understand that you ain’t in it for the money It’s scary. But not as scary as what truth means to kids I guess it ain’t no wonder they can’t proofread for shit I sit around at office hours waiting for a student But they don’t ever show up—they hate to see improvement Take my former pupil, Dan Podobed—best-selling author It was in my class that he first read some Chaucer But he slacked off, just like most of these teens Thinking college is an extension of their high school dreams For goodness sakes, parents, pass your kids the reigns They grow up to be teachers...so learn from your mistakes It’s the end of the semester, they’re checking for their vitals Did my opponent miss class? He didn’t make the finals. Yuppi: Employment's a blessing but that mart aint where i was planning to stay cause fuck the time clock, i wanted to punch in the manager's face I wanted to vanish but hey, tuition doesnt pay the bucks for itself they dont care my books catchin dust; as long as there's no dust on the shelf my luck doesnt help, needed time off to get in a shorty's trousers- he offered to sell me a new vest after scheduling me for 40 hours toss me a forty ouncer... to smash his skull but I think before I do Gotta thank him for teaching me more then any course from school sorta cool being the manager's favorite; colleagues not standing me All this time spent with these people cant think of them less then family Even the amputees and the crippled bitter jews would bring some glee The way they fight for a penny you'd think it was the jews that lincoln freed Believe me peeps, you wouldn't think this job would have my purity doom Cause Me and rico were good at stocking- the girls from the security room surely I'm screwed, whenever my mom couldn't provide no help Calling people I hadn't speak for months just to get a to ride to hell I'd like to tell stories of great pranks and girls I've fucked on the clock But honestly the worst thing I ever did at work was touching my cock It's funny to ya'll But this is real shit, I'm working at a snug site If I gave Upn a tour, I'd show the exact spots I thought of punchlines Its not thuglife or anything to brag about; I'm more a coward or nerd who'd oversleep or overboard then have to walk an hour to work Things ain't sour ya' heard? For the betterment of education I had to quit Actually If- home is where the heart is, I'm a latchey key kid... |
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