NBL Season 7 Finals mini-mag

[Sharp]

Introduction

Jesus, what a long season. What would normally take 20 weeks done in like twice that time. Thanks to the battlers that stuck around, and we're looking to have a dope finals all the same. Let's get to it.





Top Punches
In no particular order...


Kwal!ty vs. Karpis
Stealing the bars and still weak.. Are some roids next...?
You better abort or il hide how I get rid of this kid... Worse then Floyd's ex

Karpis vs. Greed
& bring up that L like it means shit but we all know who’s better
Homey ya neck has a hole that even Stritka wouldn’t pay $20 to enter

Bender vs. Karaoke
You should be ashamed of yourself, stop trying to be something that you’re not
your girl is white too & the only bandz tha make her dance are seether and slipknot

Destroyer vs. Karaoke
compared to u, i'm the rookie, but i'm throwing rights, lefts and hooks...see
& none of my punches will miss kare cuz des is taking the life out this pussy

Karaoke vs. Destroyer
We've seen the pics of your crib, stop acting like the shit's to par
When that disgusting hole in the wall might as well be in Strikta's bar

Alvin Karpis vs. Kwality
2nd round murder, covered in blood you’ll get snuffed when I pull it
You’ll see I’m a Wizard w/ the heat & that Gortat you not to fuck w/ my bullets

ill nik-A vs. strikta
but why panic? how the fuck does this guy manage
if talent speaks for itself… urs has a mouth fold & an amputee translating ur sign language

Strikta vs. ill nik-A
No honor dude.. & faggot.. I'ma leave u dead, I promise u
Ur just a spic that needs to come out da closet like Fez in Donna's room

Karaoke vs. Bender
Still reeling from the divorce, probably let another pig snatch your chick
It's ironic that ur a 911 operator when shes the 1 who dispatched u quick





Battle of the Postseason


Destroyer

compared to u, i'm the rookie, but i'm throwing rights, lefts and hooks...see
& none of my punches will miss kare cuz des is taking the life out this pussy
i'll bury u on my own, i don't need assistance to get bitches or cop wins
fuckin bags won't even help me, so i guess me & ur girl got that in common
ur reign on the top will be short, cuz u are just a robber of sorts
& ur name should be Isaiah Thomas... u take so many shots from the board
des stays hectic in violent times, that's why i'm wrecking this guy with rhymes
hear ur a male nurse, so when i'm done with u... u can check ur own vital signs
des is old and scary, with golden swords to hold & parry
i'm detour at a fucking gun rally, the way i take these blades & open kare
des is a plateful, if u heard i'm soft, cats are telling fables
u think u pushed the easy button before this battle, u gonna end up red, with staples


Karaoke

Hi...

Nike's wouldn't be sold to old dudes if it was up to me to choose
Why be a sneaker head at 50? It's not like Jordan makes orthopedic shoes
The hours behind that kiosk isn't bringing in any profits or yields
You're nothing but a faggot, who's taken more balls to the face than Delino Deshields
Can't get your bitch pregnant, u keep shooting blanks when you bone
Must hurt signing people up for family plans when u can't have 1 of your own
We've seen the pics of your crib, stop acting like the shit's to par
When that disgusting hole in the wall might as well be in Strikta's bar
You're trash, the reason y u've never topped the league isn't controversial
Ur an old dude who'll never have a championship, u belong in that Foot Locker commercial
Wife just turned legal, instead of clowning Tyson, we should be laughing at u
I heard of robbing the cradle but damn u took the mobile and stuffed animals too

Bye...



KAR WINS 5-0

Verse of the Postseason

Alvin Karpis vs. Kwal!ty

yo

I saw the tags, then your pic, and it has me forever grinning
Cuz it’s ironic us going head to head is the only battle you’re ever winning
He’ll tell you he seldom raps & he’s not the guy to embellish facts
& he didn't duck destroyer or get clowned off a site he was never welcomed at
That dome is fuckin huge and I’m surprised at the amount of space
Every time you type “SMH” I can imagine the sweat pouring down ya face
Plus typing..like..this..is..fuckin..lame, stop thinkin it’s hot
Homey you’ll never be Bigg K just cuz you’re the King of the Dots
2nd round murder, covered in blood you’ll get snuffed when I pull it
You’ll see I’m a Wizard w/ the heat & that Gortat you not to fuck w/ my bullets
My shits harder & for the dishonor you’ll get slaughtered
I’ll merk you w/out a trace cuz I never forget the gloves like Bridgewater
One look at ya pic and I was like shit homey is dead
I bet ya father called 100 of vic’s cousins just to put a roof over ya head

Outro

In a word, this season was inconsistent. Inconsistent on both sides (battling and modding) which I take plenty of responsibility for. But at the same time, this whole season was kinda weird especially compared to just about every other season before it. Discussion was live with talk about how dead text was while the league needed like 4 more votes to get to the next week and half the guys with experience would sign out for a month every time they lost a battle. But an earnest thanks to all the battlers/voters that consistently showed when they were around (to name a few): @King Karaoke @Bender @Adonis @Greed @Allen Knight @CtrlF4 @KwaL!ty @Tic Tac @ill nik-A @Tettris @Lotto Smirk @Destroyer @Amen @Plot

I'm sure I didnt get everyone, but thanks to all those who did participate and vote. Either way, go re-read karaoke's interview in the opening playoff mag and hopefully i'll see you all in some other battles

[Paradigm]

& bring up that L like it means shit but we all know who’s better
Homey ya neck has a hole that even Stritka wouldn’t pay $20 to enter

rofl

and word at the outro...

[Alvin Karpis]

ha good shit on taking ya time to get this up