09-09-2016, 11:58 AM | #1 |
Pay Homage
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: La Luna
Posts: 254
Battle Record: 2-3
Rep Power: 0 |
''Different Hues''
[QUOTE=slecht;564407]
I wanted some proper feed on this when possible. ''Different Hues'' She was red. I was blue. We were different hues. Different views. The friction grew, The addiction too, Which we didn't know our limits too. She was a Dark Red, afraid of her surroundings. I was a Carolina Blue. Full energy and always kept pounding. The fiery latina attitude matched her shade of Flame. While I was true blue - Honesty and Loyalty was my main game. Sometimes she was a Lust red, and we felt the passion together Especially when I showed her steel blue. I felt stronger than ever. I wanted to reveal my Royal Blue. Show her my definition of love. Embracing her Maroon while reminding her she will be loved. I always made sure to communicate, even when I was teal. But she remained oxblood, her pride kept her from keeping it real. A dark cloud in my sky blue front. Her feelings were Crimson - all tide up.
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09-10-2016, 08:26 AM | #2 |
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 3,938
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 0 |
For what it is, yeah can't lie thought it was cool...emotion was straight, would of liked a few more multies...like they there but isntvso to speak, flow nice just idk blame the alcohol :P I'll edit when I'm straighter lol.
Liked it though, stay upwards with it. |
09-15-2016, 11:29 PM | #3 |
rhyme capsule.
Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,146
Rep Power: 0 |
your concept cornered you into contrivance.
the premise was cool, though, and you had a couple of good lines there. |
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