C Raw.

[C Raw]

for a few weeks my minds on repeat
I barely speak but only to the monsters in my sleep
The demons out im wantin to scream and shout
Take the seanic route while im bleedin out
Im feinin clout with weapons drawn
All pest get stepped on im in the upper, upper echeilon
Rips from the bong keep me calm.
Who the fuck are you to judge me
Im Bun B, amy winehouses last shot
The bullet that killed tupac
Riding in JFK's cadillac daddys back
Crack the whip im floatin on slave ships you played bitch
Track the clip that ruined batman premier
That badmans in here reckin gear with black mask
Shot glass full of gas light a fire under your ass
Keep it simple stupid im a common nusance
With two chicks with 4 tits and 2clits runnin shit
Fuck you, you, you, and your bitch ill dump a clip
Reload and drop the other bitch. Dont play me.
Im worse than Aids and TB, gays and fecies

Its C Raw bitch.

[Split]

Originally Posted by C Raw

for a few weeks my minds on repeat
I barely speak but only to the monsters in my sleep
The demons out im wantin to scream and shout
Take the seanic route while im bleedin out
Im feinin clout with weapons drawn
All pest get stepped on im in the upper, upper echeilon

Im Bun B, amy winehouses last shot
The bullet that killed tupac

haha those quotes were pretty cool, yo. upper echelon one stood out for some reason, it was just a clutch rhyme. woulda been cooler to see some more complex shit but this was nice either way. keep keyin

[C Raw]

Thanks, preciate it.

Edit: My spelling <<< fuckin phone.

[Dope girl]

is was pretty cool so far, next time add more complexity & creativity.

[C Raw]

Ill work on that. Thanks.

[Zen]

Drop feed on other posts in the OM.
To the feed on this piece, the scheme was very basic. I'd like to see more complex ideas and wording thrown in here. It was a flex piece so it doesn't have to be complex but that's what I'd like to read instead of someone just flexing. Peep other people's posts in the OM and see what they're doing and try to implement it in your style. It helped me so I'm sure it'll help you as well. Stay active man.

[Natural]

This was aight. It seems very audio oriented to me. For text your gon have to do much better than that. I see definite potential though.
Stay uo

[Fig]

This felt like something ready to spit. It was fresh, but pretty basic for just text. When it comes to text, you gotta change it up. Stronger concepts, structure, wording etc.

Dont get me wrong though, i really liked it, it just aint a great text piece ya know? If you rap though, id love to hear it.

[grindin]

think of punchlines my dude!! they always livin up verse's keep doin ur thing tho

[Breh321]

fell off to the end tbh

idk if this'll help, but for me, i keep those fire openers all in one verse, so like i'll go in maybe 8 bars and then stop, then after that i'll get another 8 bars i would've used for another "verse" opener so my shit doesnt get stale

if you keep goin with the flow through free/keystyle in my experience, you hit about a good 6-8 bars of filler before hittin another punch/dope thought

keep bangin tho

[Just Write]

this was a cool flex, i think if you used comma's and periods it would help the reader find how you want it to flow more. just remember its hard for the reader to catch how the writer wants it to be read so sometimes those little things help guide the reader. this was cool though, ill look out for your next drop