Underappreciated.

Certain · 08-05-2013, 04:36 AM

My spark plugs are blown. Is someone home?
I'm trying to get my life up and goin'.
From dusk 'til gloam, I'll bust my butt and roam,
trying to function alone
with nothing but a crusted bone and this fucking poem.
Ready to cut a throat like a young Capone.
Trying to better my reach as I work to touch the throne.
Predators creep ahead of the weak, but I serve and protect.
So let's settle this beef with a murderous bet.
Yes, I'd prefer to the death. I'm winning either way
and would certainly get the perfect event if the tourniquet bled.
I deserve some respect, yet I work and I sweat
and take the perks of each check to the Perkins for eggs.
I'm always here, Mr. Dependable with the irreversible debt
and a landlord who isn't curbing the rent.
About to burst with regret.
Would that nervousness end with a funeral?
No one ever forgets the beautiful.

Kold Breeze · 08-05-2013, 10:12 AM

I fukken loved it! ill! Keep it up

BWHAHA · 08-06-2013, 02:12 PM

wow! You're really snappy with words mister Serpent.

I liked the switch and variety of flow comparable to the subject matter at hand without sacrificing literary elements in a safeguarded stanza.

They don't forget the beautiful, that is true.

Brian Bryan · 08-08-2013, 08:40 AM

Yeahhhhhhhhhh, loved it, slick flow, buttersmooth, reminded me of early Em in parts around the "reverse this debt" section - which is no bad thing, just happened to notice it.

short and sweet. real enjoyable read

our styles are madd similar though - we should collab, bro.

keep that pen moving!

Geno · 08-08-2013, 07:48 PM

was gonna say the same thing, very reminiscent of slims 'rock bottom' track

had a slow start and then went pretty nuts. good read, im a fan

Vulgar · 08-09-2013, 02:15 AM

Sgt. Serpent, much like you to bring an opaque offering to this sturdy aquarium. Just solid content all around. Not rough around the edges.

08-05-2013, 04:36 AM	#1
Certain Mad fucking dangerous. Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 12,066 Battle Record: 40-19 Champed - AOWL Season 3 - Art of Writing League (2x) Rep Power: 85899406	Underappreciated. My spark plugs are blown. Is someone home? I'm trying to get my life up and goin'. From dusk 'til gloam, I'll bust my butt and roam, trying to function alone with nothing but a crusted bone and this fucking poem. Ready to cut a throat like a young Capone. Trying to better my reach as I work to touch the throne. Predators creep ahead of the weak, but I serve and protect. So let's settle this beef with a murderous bet. Yes, I'd prefer to the death. I'm winning either way and would certainly get the perfect event if the tourniquet bled. I deserve some respect, yet I work and I sweat and take the perks of each check to the Perkins for eggs. I'm always here, Mr. Dependable with the irreversible debt and a landlord who isn't curbing the rent. About to burst with regret. Would that nervousness end with a funeral? No one ever forgets the beautiful.

08-08-2013, 07:48 PM	#5
Geno White Earl Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Philly Cat. Posts: 12,354 Battle Record: 10-15 Accomplishments - Open Mic HOF (4x) Champed - Netcees Writers League - Write Week I - Write Week 8 Rep Power: 50036761	was gonna say the same thing, very reminiscent of slims 'rock bottom' track had a slow start and then went pretty nuts. good read, im a fan __________________ *-A.bove T.he R.est*

08-05-2013, 10:12 AM	#2
Kold Breeze Nokyo Genosyde Join Date: Aug 2013 Location: South Side Posts: 14 Rep Power: 37	I fukken loved it! ill! Keep it up

08-06-2013, 02:12 PM	#3
BWHAHA Sophomore Member Join Date: Aug 2013 Posts: 176 Rep Power: 4754293	wow! You're really snappy with words mister Serpent. I liked the switch and variety of flow comparable to the subject matter at hand without sacrificing literary elements in a safeguarded stanza. They don't forget the beautiful, that is true.

08-08-2013, 08:40 AM	#4
Brian Bryan BITER Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: England Posts: 620 Battle Record: 4-0 Champed - Gimmick Battle League Rep Power: 0	Yeahhhhhhhhhh, loved it, slick flow, buttersmooth, reminded me of early Em in parts around the "reverse this debt" section - which is no bad thing, just happened to notice it. short and sweet. real enjoyable read our styles are madd similar though - we should collab, bro. keep that pen moving!

08-09-2013, 02:15 AM	#6
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Sgt. Serpent, much like you to bring an opaque offering to this sturdy aquarium. Just solid content all around. Not rough around the edges.